A Hope Renewed
by Hopesparkles
Summary: A misunderstanding leads to a forced marriage between Bella who is caring for her ailing father after losing their home, and Edward who has recently inherited his uncle's estate and has no intention of taking a wife.  All Human/Regency era fic.
1. Unending Rain

BPOV

Dropping the mass of fabric into my lap, I rested my head against the back of the chair, closed my eyes and took a deep breath. It was the second time I had mended this dress and it was becoming threadbare and faded. I slowly opened my eyes and looked around the quiet room. The candles were low. I would need to check our supply and make sure we had enough to get through the colder months. The days were getting shorter now and we would use more candles. It would not be pleasant to run out when the walk into town was more than four miles. I should also get the extra blankets from the storage chest in the barn. As I began to make a mental checklist, my father came into the room with a book in his hand. It was the same book he read every evening after supper and he never seemed to finish it. At least he has not finished it in the last three and a half years that we have lived in the little cottage. He rereads the same five pages each evening, never remembering that he read the same pages the evening before. I envied him that, the not remembering.

"How long until supper?" he asked, sitting down at the table.

"Papa, we had supper almost two hours past. Do you not remember, or are you still hungry?" Perhaps he had not eaten enough. I did not notice how much he ate at supper. I suppose I should probably keep a watch on that as well.

"I must have forgotten. I am not hungry. Perhaps I will head up to bed as well. Could you have Smith take care of the fire in the library for me?"

"Of course, Papa. Good night."

"Good night, my dear."

James Smith had not been in our employ for nearly four years. He had left us shortly before the bank took our estate. Papa had been forgetting things and apparently neglecting payments as well. By the time I knew what was happening, we were so far in debt that there was no possibility of recovery. Smith had left our home suddenly and we were left to inform the rest of the staff that we no longer had the means to pay them. I spent many hours trying to find employment elsewhere for them. The bank manager took pity on us and left us a small cottage at the edge of the estate for us to live in. I think he understood my father's health issues and did not want to leave us on the streets. I was only sixteen when we lost our home.

The cottage was small. Two bedrooms, an open kitchen/living area and a water closet. We had a small barn that housed our chickens. The eggs were our best source of income and I walked into town every other day to sell them in the marketplace. Life was drastically different from what it was just a few years ago, but we were healthy and had enough to eat, and we had a roof over our heads. It was more than many others had and I found I could not complain.

Thunder sounding overhead pulled me from my memories as I blew out the candles. I could hear the gentle thrumming of the rain on the roof and walked back into the kitchen to retrieve a large bucket. Placing it on the floor near the fireplace, I turned to quickly tend to the fire. With the rain and wind it would be cold tonight. As I finished up, I glanced over to see the first few drops of water fall into the bucket. I would need to add patching the roof to my ever growing list. Picking up the candleholder I made my way to my bedroom and quickly stripped off my dress. It too was in need of mending and was becoming threadbare. It was in these moments alone before bed that I missed my old life. I missed the parties, the rides in carriages, the beautiful dresses, hats and ribbons, the possibility of a future with a husband and household of my own. Now, with none of these things and certainly no dowry, there was no hope for that future. It was that hope that I missed most of all.

EPOV

It was raining again. It had been raining since I arrived two days ago. The estate, Collingsworth, was truly beautiful. My uncle purchased it at auction a few years back and intended to use it as a summer home. He and my aunt were loved the area and I suspect they would have used it far more than just a summer escape. However, when both took ill and passed unexpectedly a few months ago it sat empty until the papers were signed and it was presented to me by my father. He was to inherit the estate but quickly passed it to me in the hopes that I would finally settle on a wife and take over running the estate. I was not opposed to this idea, but I have no desire to marry for the sake of marrying alone. Thankfully my parents had made no arrangement for me and I would eventually choose a bride for myself. But I am certainly in no rush to do so.

I spent much of the last few days hiring staff for my estate and making preparations to set up a household here. I knew very little about the history, only that the owner prior to my uncle had apparently squandered his fortune on unknown expenditures and had lost his home to the creditors. I have no knowledge of his fate or his family.

"Sir, is there anything else that you require of me this evening?"

I had not noticed that Mr. Tyler had entered the library. "No Tyler, I believe I am ready to retire for the evening. Will you see that my carriage is ready in the morning? I would like to go into the town and perhaps call on some of the neighbors."

"Of course. Good night, Sir."

"Good night, Tyler." I turned back to the window as Tyler left the room. I hoped the rain would end before morning. There were still parts of Collingsworth that I had not seen and much of the outlying area around the estate as well. There were also several small homes that belonged to the tenant farmers and field hands. It was my hope to offer them any assistance as their success would also certainly benefit Collingsworth.

I had no illusions that running an estate would be easy. I knew there would be much hard work, especially in the beginning, but I also knew that in the end I would have a profitable and very prestigious estate. I turned to head up to my rooms and encountered Tyler in the hallway. He informed me of the readiness of my carriage and driver in the morning and bid me goodnight once again before he went into the library to turndown the oil lamps and see to the fire. I continued on to my rooms as the thunder continued to roar outside. I had high hopes for the future, but tonight I was tired and ready for a good night's rest.


	2. Eggs and Memories

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and alerted this story. I can hardly believe I finally had the courage to post it, but you have all made me glad I did!**

**I should probably also say that I own nothing, but that Edward definitely owns me.**

**So…. Let's get to know Bella a little better….**

BPOV

I woke to bright light streaming into the room from the window. This could only mean two things. The first, that it was not raining for the first time in days, and the second, that I had certainly overslept. I sat up and looked around the room in the morning light. Small chest in the corner with a wooden bowl and pitcher perched on the top. One wooden chair in the opposite corner with a faded floral pillow resting on the seat. I rarely used this chair as it wobbled horribly when sat upon. Though it did balance out the room well, as aside from the chair, there were only the chest and my small bed to decorate the room.

I rose from bed dressing quickly and heading into the main room of the cottage to tend the fire. Putting on a pot of water for tea, I cut a few slices of bread and placed them on a plate with some dried apples. This would make a simple breakfast for my father while I gathered the eggs and readied myself to go into town. I emptied the bucket of the rain water that had leaked into the cottage overnight and replaced the bucket to the cupboard. Picking up my basket, I made my way to the barn.

It was definitely getting colder as fall was quickly passing and winter would soon be upon us. I wondered how many chickens we would lose this winter. They seemed to be hearty, but we had lost nearly half last year. Of course, I was getting better at this life. Mrs. Webber, the pastor's wife, had taken pity on me that first year and taught me how to do the most basic of things. Things that our household staff had always done for us – starting and tending a fire, baking bread, planting, tending and harvesting a simple garden, and how to put up vegetables and fruits for the winter months. She also taught me how to mend clothing and to care for the chickens. I believe we would have certainly perished that first year if not for Mrs. Webber's guidance. I will always regret the tantrums I had in response to her efforts at first. I was preparing for my first season and thinking only of the formal balls and parties that I would never be part of because of our change in social status. I am ashamed to admit that I behaved so selfishly toward her when she only wished to help us survive. I am forever in her debt.

"Well, what have you for me today, little chicks?" I reached under the hen closest to the end and began our morning ritual. I would lift them from their warm perches with my cold hands and they would protest loudly.

Once all the eggs were gathered, I set the basket on the floor and tossed out a few handfuls of feed. I would need to purchase enough to last us through the winter while in town later. I picked up my basket and headed back into the house. I would need to hurry to make it into town and back before dark.

My father looked up from the fire as I entered the house. His brow furrowed and a stern look crossed his features. He leaned one hand on the mantle and put the other in his pocket when he spoke. "I do not know what it will take to get you to stop doing the work we pay others to do, Isabella! Let the staff do their jobs. It will not do for you to labor so if you wish to ever catch a husband."

"Yes, Papa." I had no other answer for him. In his mind, he was still living in our manor and could not comprehend of his daughter doing manual labor. It was as though something in him snapped and his mind dimmed to the reality around him when our circumstances changed. I wished that I had that escape as well.

"Papa, I am heading in to the market. Will you be alright if I have lunch set out for you?"

"Of course. I am not helpless, my dear. Are you off to find new ribbons or perhaps a new gown for the Winter Ball? Take one of the staff to help you carry your packages."

"Yes, Papa."

The Winter Ball was an event I had looked forward to my entire life. As a child, I watched my mother prepare for the Ball and create the most beautiful floral arrangements from flowers grown in her own garden. She attended to every detail and nothing escaped her notice. I could hardly wait to reach an age to attend. The very year we lost our estate was to be my first season in society. My father was nervous and worried about it all. My mother had passed away as a result of a sudden illness only two years earlier and he was certain he could not oversee me properly into society without the help of a woman. He had asked Mrs. Mallory to see to it that I had the proper attire and etiquette to ready for the events of the season. Her daughter, Lauren, was my closest friend. She was to have her first season that year as well. It was only a few weeks later that the creditors had taken our home, as well as my hope for the season.

Well, it would do me no good to dwell on those memories now. I gathered up some bread, cheese and some dried fruit and left them on the table under a cloth for my father's lunch. Gathering the rest of the eggs, I placed them in the basket with the others and placed the basket by the door. Walking into my bedroom, I closed the door behind me and opened the top drawer of the chest in the corner. Picking up the bundle of handkerchiefs, I unwrapped the items inside. Laying aside the sapphire and diamond pendant that belonged to my mother, I held the only other item in my hand. It was a ruby hair comb that belonged to my grandmother on my father's side. It would be much easier to part with than the pendant that had so often adorned my mother's neck. They were all I had left of the few items I had taken from the estate when we left. Each year I sold one item to a merchant in town. It would make up the difference in what we needed to survive the winter. Eggs would only afford us so much.

I wrapped up the comb and placed it in my basket with the eggs. Gathering my shawl and my basket, I left for town. The four mile walk was not so bad when the sun was shining as it was today. Perhaps I would even have enough time to see Pastor and Mrs. Webber before needing to head home.

* * * A H R * * *

"I am afraid it will not bring as much as you desire, child," Mr. Banner held the comb gently in his hand as he looked it over. He leaned in closer before adding, "but I will give you more for it than it is worth if you promise not to tell Mrs. Banner."

"I could not ask that of you." I whispered.

"You did not ask, I offered. Now, tell me what you need and we will make our exchange."

I told him of my need for grain for the chickens, oats and flour and various other kitchen staples and nails for the necessary roof repairs. He gathered the requested supplies and gave me the remainder of my income from the eggs and the comb. It was then I realized that next year I would have to trade my mother's pendant and would have nothing else of hers or anything to tide us over for the winters following. A moment of panic set in and I knew Mr. Banner was worried by his wide eyes and slight gasp.

"Are you well, Miss Swan? Shall I get Mrs. Banner to attend you?"

"No, please. I am well. I just need some air. Thank you."

"I will have my man deliver your order to your home this afternoon. Will you need any assistance getting home?"

I assured him I would not and after thanking him again for his kind generosity, walked out into the sunlight. I took a deep breath and tried to calm my nerves. I gazed out across the street and saw Mrs. Mallory and Lauren. Lauren smiled and waved. Mrs. Mallory immediately took notice and turned to Lauren and spoke furiously, waving her hands in the air around her. I could not hear her words, but I could guess given her countenance and the sadness with which Lauren glanced my way. Looking down at the ground, I turned and began to stroll down the street toward the Webber home. Stopping to allow two children to pass in front of me, I glanced in the shop window nearest me.

It was the dressmakers shop and was easily the busiest shop on the street today. Many ladies and young girls were inside, no doubt looking for dresses for the Winter Ball. In the window was the most lovely blue gown. The exact color of the sapphire in my mother's pendant. I allowed myself a moment to dream about what it would be like to wear that gown and pendant to the Ball. To have my dance card filled for the evening. To sleep until noon the following day to recover from exhaustion. To have a gentleman caller after that to compliment my father on successfully bringing his daughter into society and to seek a chaperoned audience to further our acquaintance….

I took a deep breath to clear my head and looked up to cross the street. However, the breath left my body in a rush as I looked up and saw a gentleman exit his carriage in front of me. He was the most handsome man I had ever seen. Stunning green eyes scanned the street in front of him and as he looked my way, I turned my head slightly to watch him in the window. He had a strong jaw and the most beautiful bronze colored hair that was in a windblown disarray. He was tall and had broad shoulders.

I was immediately embarrassed and I am certain I flushed bright red. I had the irrational fear that he would somehow learn my thoughts and know of my attraction to him. It was then that a profound sadness washed over me. He was completely unattainable to me, socially. It would not have been so only a few short years ago, but now, there was no hope that I would ever have a husband, or that it would be someone like this beautiful stranger.

I no longer felt like visiting with the Webbers, so I turned and started the long walk back home. If I made good time, perhaps I could patch the roof before nightfall.


	3. Town and Tenants

EPOV

None of it made any sense. I had been looking over the accounts for the estate for the last ten years and everything seemed to be in order and extremely profitable until about four years ago. There were large amounts of money missing from the accounts and no receipts for expenditures. The gentleman, a Mr. Swan, had taken great care to record even the smallest of household and personal expenses, yet there were suddenly very large discrepancies in the income and expenditures. I spent the early morning trying to make sense of it. My uncle had kept immaculate records as well and the estate had flourished under his management. My head was beginning to ache and I was beyond ready for a change of scenery. Closing the books, I stood from my desk in the library and called for Tyler to let him know I was ready to leave.

My carriage had been loaded with small baskets full of simple gifts for the tenant farmers. I was planning to visit as many of their homes as I was able before evening. Before I could make those visits, however, I needed to take care of some business in town. Apparently, my uncle had discovered that Collingsworth Hall had been host to a large ball every winter and he made the mistake of passing that information along to my mother and sister. They were thrilled with the prospect of planning such an event on my behalf to "introduce me to the local society" in my new home. I was under no illusions as far as my mother's intentions. She was looking for a wife for me, plain and simple. It was my duty this morning to gather as much information regarding this event and the past preparations so that when my family arrived next week for their first visit my mother could begin planning the ball.

"Mr. Cullen, your carriage is out front. Is there anything more you require for your trip today?"

"Thank you, Tyler. That will be all. I should return for supper this evening."

"Very well, Sir."

Tyler was quickly becoming a man I could easily trust to oversee my household. He was trustworthy, honest, and kind. I had no qualms regarding the integrity of his character. Perhaps he would be the best to handle hiring the rest of the staff I would need for the estate.

"Tyler, you know many of the families in the area. Would you be comfortable interviewing prospects for the staff?"

"It would be my honor to do that for you, Sir. Would you like to review before actually hiring those I choose?"

I thought about this for a moment. If I trusted him to interview, I could trust him to hire. "No. I trust your judgement, Tyler. Please get references for anyone you consider."

"Yes, Sir. And thank you for your confidence."

"Very well. I'll leave you to it." With that, I climbed into the carriage and tapped my open hand against the side to let my driver know he could proceed into town.

* * * A H R * * *

Several hours into the day and I had finally finished my business in town and was headed toward the outlying areas of Collingsworth when I saw a small dress shop. I knew Alice would love a new shawl or ribbons and had the driver stop so I could see to it.

Stepping out of the carriage, I was singularly focused on the entrance to the shop when a woman stepped into my path.

"Good afternoon, Sir. I do not believe we have met. Are you new to the area? Do you have family here?" She was speaking so quickly I could not get a word in. When she finally drew breath, I answered.

"Good day, Madam. Edward Cullen, and yes, I am new to the area. I have recently acquired property here and was just making some acquaintances in town. And might I have the pleasure of your name?"

She smiled widely and pulled a young woman from behind her as she answered. "I am Mrs. Mallory and this is my daughter, Lauren. Our residence is Worley Hall, just south of town. Would you be available this evening for supper, by chance?"

Young Lauren was lovely, but the predatory look in her mother's eye had me on guard immediately. She was surely on the hunt for a match for her daughter. "Thank you for your kind offer, but I am already engaged for the meal this evening. My days for the foreseeable future are quite busy as I am settling into my new home as well as preparing for a visit from my family next week. Perhaps another time?"

I had no reason to inform her that my supper companion would be a book from the apparently extensive collection in my library. I was looking forward to the quiet evening ahead.

"I will hold you to that, Mr. Cullen. It is a pleasure to meet you. Come, Lauren." And with that, they walked away. I had met Mrs. Mallory's type before. She was looking to find a husband of better standing for her daughter. I had given her nothing to work with in regards to my social standing or fortune, so I was certain she would begin to seek answers on her own as to my ability to provide the life she wanted for her daughter.

Shaking my head, I walked into the shop and sought out some help in choosing something for my sister.

* * * A H R * * *

By the time afternoon began to turn to evening, I had been in the homes of six families who tended my land. The tenant farmers were kind and generous and it was evident that they respected my uncle. I had given gifts to each household and had received several in return. Fruit, honey, nuts, and handmade lace handkerchiefs that I had no use for. Perhaps Alice or my mother would enjoy them. I had one more cottage on the way back to the manor for supper and my book by the fire.

As we pulled to a stop in front of the tiny house, it appeared there was no one home. I exited the carriage and walked up to the door, knocking gently. They had all looked the same, but this one seemed devoid of the sound of children, the smell of an evening meal cooking or horses neighing in the barn. After a few moments, I knocked again when there was no answer.

Wanting to leave my gifts, I walked back to the carriage where my driver was holding the basket. It was then that movement caught my eye from the side of the house. Stepping back, I walked around the corner and came upon a woman climbing down a small ladder from the side of the house.

"Good afternoon, Miss," I called out, not wanting to surprise her. However, she must have been a bit startled as she missed the next to last step. I leapt forward with my arms out, not wanting her to fall to the ground. It was my appearance that caused her misstep after all.

She cried out in surprise when my arms caught her. After just a moment, she was steady and turned in my arms, placing her small hands on my chest, and looked up, meeting my gaze.

I was speechless. She was stunningly beautiful. Soft brown curls framing her face and rich, deep brown eyes that seemed bottomless. Her pink lips parted ever so slightly as she took in a quick breath.

"Are you well?" I whispered, afraid to speak too loudly and break the spell I had so quickly fallen under.

"Yes. I am so very sorry. I must have lost my balance and was – " Her words were abruptly stopped by the sound of an older man bursting through the door. It was only then that I realized that I still held her firmly with my hands wrapped around her tiny waist. I released her and turned toward him only to be staring down the barrel of his revolver, which was aimed squarely at my head.


	4. Misunderstandings and a Wedding

**I still own nothing, but I do own a house that is now covered in Christmas lights.**

**I can't say THANK YOU enough to those of you who have alerted, favorited, and reviewed this story. You are beyond kind with you words of encouragement.**

**Let's hear a little more from Bella, shall we? It will get a little bumpy, be prepared.**

BPOV

Once I returned home from town, I prepared a simple soup and left it to simmer until it was time for supper. I knew that possibility of rain was always looming, so while I still had daylight on a sunny day, I set about patching the roof. I gathered the small mallet and a small piece of wood from the barn as well as the nails that I had purchased earlier in the day. Lifting the small ladder from the wall of the barn on my way out, I dropped the nails in my apron pocket. As I exited the barn, I heard the distinct sound of carriage wheels.

Coming around to the front of the cottage, I was greeted by Pastor and Mrs. Webber and their daughter, Angela. She ran ahead of her parents and wrapped her arms around me in a tight embrace.

"I thought you would come to visit today. I have missed you dearly, Isabella."

"I had planned on stopping in, but the day has just gotten away and there were so many chores left that needed my attention. But do tell me, what has brought you all the way out here?" I asked as I reached out to grasp the hand of Pastor Webber.

He took hold of both of my hands and took a deep breath before responding. "As you know, Mr. Cullen's passing has left Collingsworth Hall vacant for a few months." I nodded in understanding and he continued. "His nephew has inherited the estate and I have been informed that he has taken residence in the manor and has planned to see to the management himself. He will be making the rounds to present himself to the tenant farmers in the very near future. I thought you would like some time to prepare."

I knew what he was saying. The cottage we lived in was previously inhabited by tenant farmers on Collingsworth. Once Mr. Cullen's nephew knew of our circumstance, he could demand that we either work the land, sharing the profits with the estate, or vacate the property so that it could be inhabited by someone who would be willing to do so.

I closed my eyes and took a long breath to steady myself before asking, "Do you know what sort of man he is?"

Pastor Webber's brow drew together in a frown and he was thoughtful for a moment. Finally, he looked up and answered, "Isabella, if you are asking me if he will be understanding to your plight, I have no way of knowing. He may be compassionate and allow you to stay. His uncle was a kind and generous man. I have to believe he is of the same form and will be kind to you as well. But the truth of it is, I cannot say with any assurance what sort of man he is."

"Thank you, Pastor Webber. I suppose only time will tell and there is nothing to be done until we have met him. Please, come have some tea and visit with my father. I know he will be overjoyed to see you."

I led them into the house for tea and my father and I spent the better part of the afternoon laughing and enjoying some sweet moments with my friends. Just before suppertime, the Webbers took their leave, insisting that their own supper was waiting at home. I promised to call in on them later in the week when I came into town with my eggs.

I decided to wait supper just a short while longer and tend to the patch on the roof while there was still daylight. Going back outside, I quickly placed the ladder next to the side of the cottage and climbed up, board in hand. Placing it over the worn area, I quickly nailed it in place and dropped the mallet to the ground before stepping down the ladder.

Just as I reached the last few steps, I heard a man's voice behind me. I jumped, startled that I had not heard him approach and missed the last steps. I braced myself, expecting to land hard on the ground. I am certain I let out a yelp when I was caught up by the arms that I assumed belonged to the voice that startled me to begin with.

I turned and looked up and was met by the same shocking green eyes that I had encountered in the marketplace earlier in the day. It seemed all the air had vacated my lungs and I quickly gasped in a breath.

"Are you well?" he whispered. I desperately wanted him to speak fully. I was sure his voice was as beautiful as his countenance.

I finally found my voice and answered, "Yes. I am so very sorry. I must have lost my balance and was – " My words were interrupted when my father came bursting through the door of the cottage and leveled his firearm at the man who held me tightly in his arms.

I turned quickly and looked at my father, who was staring down the barrel of his revolver at the man standing beside me. "Papa, please." I begged him breathlessly.

"What are your intentions, young man?" My father growled out.

To his credit, the man remained calm as he addressed my father. "Sir, clearly there has been a misunderstanding. I have no intention of – " His words quickly stopped when my father stepped closer and raised the revolver to just inches from the man's face.

"You have no intentions? You come here and place your hands on my daughter and expect me to allow you to walk away and disregard her reputation and place in society? You are no gentleman, sir!"

I was stunned at my father's boldness to not only insult this stranger, but to report to him a standing in society that was certainly much more than we enjoyed at that moment. This man certainly knew we were not his social match, but I suppose that when you are confronted with a firearm, you have no care for society's rules of standing.

I understood in that moment that my father firmly believed that we had never lost our estate and that he was truly defending the honor of his daughter who was still a lady. Because of this, I knew beyond all doubt that this stranger, this beautiful man beside me was in great danger. If my father thought he was going to bring me dishonor, he would not hesitate to shoot to defend me. I needed to do something quickly to protect this man.

I turned and immediately addressed the stranger. "Sir, please, just agree with whatever he says. He will not hurt you if you comply with his demands."

He looked bewildered and I had no idea if he understood how precarious his situation was. I leaned closer and whispered, "Please, I will explain everything. Just agree with whatever he asks."

"I have no demands, save one. You, Sir, will make an honorable woman of my daughter, or you will suffer the consequences." My father was livid and his face was becoming more crimson by the moment. I began to fear for his health. He turned to address the driver who had remained silent during the entire exchange.

"You there, what is your name?" My father was shouting now.

"Yorkie, Sir. Eric Yorkie." The poor driver was glancing quickly between my father and the man at the point of his gun. I am certain he was weighing the possible outcomes should he attempt to aid his employer.

"Ready that carriage. We will all ride together to see the Justice." With that, my father turned and climbed into the carriage and looked at the stranger and I expectantly. After observing our hesitation, he once again raised the revolver toward the man beside me. I was stunned when the man took hold of my wrist and pulled me behind him, placing himself between my father's firearm and me.

"It will not do to have you put in harm's way, Miss." He stated this so quietly and I was devastated by his desire to protect me while his own life was threatened by my father.

Slowly, we began to walk forward. Placing his hand under my forearm, he helped me up into the carriage where we all took our seats. I sat beside the stranger as my father sat in the center of the opposite seat, not allowing a space to share it. I thought he could surely hear my heart beating. It felt as though it would beat out of my chest.

I glanced up at my father, who smiled indulgently at me then turned to watch the passing scenery. There was no doubt that he believed he was rescuing my honor from a man whose name I did not even know. I glanced sideways at this man and saw him staring intently at my father's revolver. It was then that he turned his gaze on me and spoke quietly.

"Might I at least learn the name of my intended?"

I could not meet his gaze as I whispered, "Isabella, Sir."

"Well, Isabella, I would say that it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, however, since I have every fear for my life in this moment, you will have to allow me to reserve judgment until a later date."

I had no idea how to respond to his words, so I remained silent. It was only a few minutes until we arrived at the home of the Justice. The man climbed down from the carriage under the watchful eye of my father and his firearm and raised his hand to assist me from the carriage as well. Once we were all dismounted, we made our way to the door, which was already open and we were greeted by Mrs. Clearwater, the Justice's wife.

"Mrs. Clearwater, we are in need of your husband's services this fine evening. My Isabella is to be wed!" My father seemed thrilled at the thought, while I was afraid of falling to tears. I had not cried since we had lost our estate and did not wish to start again today. Tears were of no use when your survival depended on strength of character and keeping your wits about you. Becoming overly emotional would not be helpful in this moment.

Mrs. Clearwater's brow immediately shot up nearly to her hairline as she turned to me. "Would you like to come with me and freshen up, dear?"

"Yes, please."

I felt terrible about leaving the man alone with my father, but thought this may be my only chance to seek assistance from someone who could stop this madness. Mrs. Clearwater led me into a smaller sitting room and called for Justice Clearwater to join us.

"Isabella? What has transpired? How is it that you come here to be wed, of all things?" They both looked expectantly at me and I tried my best to answer her questions, telling them all that had happened this evening.

"What shall we do? I fear my father will do him harm if we do not proceed?"

Justice Clearwater thought for a moment before finally pulling out a marriage certificate and a quill. He began writing the information in the proper spaces as he spoke.

"We will proceed just as we would for any other wedding. When the ceremony is over, we will instruct the gentleman that he is not to sign the document. It will be just as if it were a rehearsal of sorts. There will be no legal binding of the marriage. I will make certain your father sees the certificate with our signatures witnessing the marriage and will make it appear that the gentleman is signing within your father's sight. After all is done, I will see your father home and my wife will return you to your home by breakfast in the morning. Will this suffice?"

"Sir, I think it is our best hope. Thank you. His memory is worse by the day and I believe you are correct that by morning, he will have forgotten the events of this evening altogether."

After a few more moments to straighten my hair and remove my apron, we re-entered the larger sitting room where my father and the stranger stood immediately. Justice Clearwater quickly began placing us for the false ceremony.

"Isabella, you stand here, facing me. And you, Sir…"

"Edward."

"Yes, Edward, stand here next to Isabella. Very well, let us begin."

Edward. Edward. It was a fitting name. He looked like an Edward. My mind registered that there were words being spoken in the background and that there were actually other people in the room, but all I was able to truly comprehend were his even breaths next to me. At one point, he gently took my hand and turned me to face him. I stared intently at his hand holding mine as I recited words without really knowing what I was saying. It was that brief moment that I allowed myself to believe that this was real. That he truly wanted to marry me and build a future with me. That I had a future to offer him. I turned my face up to his, finally gathering enough courage to meet his eyes. He was gazing intently at me, but as our eyes met, his gaze seemed to soften somewhat. He released one of my hands and gently ran his thumb across my cheek, wiping away tears I had not even known were falling.

I found it almost difficult to breathe. He was showing such gentleness to me in that moment. I felt a horrible weight of guilt for the imposition he was facing. My father had caused him great discomfort because of me. He had no idea of the plan that had been set in motion between myself and Justice Clearwater. I could only hope he would be understanding.

Only a few moments passed and were were turned to face the only three in attendance to witness my humiliation: my father, Mrs. Clearwater, and the carriage driver. We were pronounced husband and wife. Thankfully, there was no declaration of Mr. and Mrs. Justice Clearwater was a wise man in making no such public announcement.

Immediately, my father gathered me into his arms and held me tightly to him. "There is no father more proud of a child than I am today. You have become a beautiful woman and I have no doubt you will be a good wife to your husband."

I was stunned at his words. My father was kind and loving, but the words were rare to fall from his lips. It was sorrowful that they were spoken in the face of a false event. He would not remember in the morning, and our lives would continue on. But for this moment, I knew my father was proud of me.

I was handed off to Justice and Mrs. Clearwater who embraced me and whispered their assurances that all would be well. It would be explained to the gentleman once my father was gone. Mrs. Clearwater pulled me by hand to the next room to give me the revolver that my father had relinquished to her husband. He was insistent that a wedding was no place for a firearm and took it from my father's hands to ensure the safety of all involved.

"Are you well, Isabella? Would you care for some water?"

"Yes, Mrs. Clearwater, I would very much like some water. I have never been more frightened for anyone in my life. I am certain he will despise me for this imposition."

"Now, now. Just keep yourself calm, dear girl. Justice Clearwater is surely now allowing your father to see the document and will send him home with our driver momentarily. Once he is away, we will take this matter in hand and I am sure all will be understood and forgiven."

She seemed so certain and calm. I could not help but be hopeful that she was correct in regards to the gentleman's… Edward's response to our situation. She brought me a glass of water, which I sipped gratefully, and then gestured for me to walk ahead of her into the sitting room.

As we entered the room, the heads of the Justice, the carriage driver and Edward turned quickly in our direction. Their expressions were unreadable. Edward glanced toward his driver, and gaining his attention, nodded once. As the driver headed outside, Edward immediately turned his eyes back to me. They were no longer warm and gentle as they had been this afternoon. They now seemed cold and distant. His mouth was set in a hard line. He stepped forward and held his hand out toward me before asking, "Are you prepared to leave now, _wife_?"

The way he spoke, with the stern set of his jaw, caused my blood to run cold. I had no knowledge of this man, or why he was prepared to leave with me. Justice Clearwater embraced me and placed his cheek against mine before whispering, "He signed the document, Isabella. He signed it immediately before you even left the room with my wife. I am afraid there is nothing to be done, at least not this evening. I will make inquiries in the morning regarding an annulment. I am very sorry."

I felt the panic set in as I realized I was truly married to this man. Only minutes ago, I had fantasized about that very thing and now it seemed a nightmare. I would be leaving this house with my … husband, and joining him in his carriage. I had never been with a man unchaperoned. I am certain the fear I felt was evident on my face as I met his angry eyes.

"Come. I am tired and want to be home and done with this day. Let us go now." He was still holding out his hand toward me. With a last glance at Mrs. Clearwater's nervous face, I reached out and placed my hand in his. He immediately closed his fingers around mine and pulled me toward the door. "Thank you for your services this evening, Justice. I am certain we will see each other soon." And with that he pulled me out into the night.

We had been traveling by carriage for a few miles when the silence became unbearable. I finally found my voice. "Sir, you should know, my father's actions this evening – " He spoke before I could finish.

"You have accomplished what you set out to do, no?" He asked angrily.

"I do not understand."

"Were you lying in wait for me to come to you? Or perhaps the opportunity presented itself and you simply chose to take advantage of it rather than waiting me out? Either way, you should know, I shall have papers drawn up to prevent you from obtaining anything other than what you have now." He was clearly upset and I worried that I was only provoking him. I sat quietly for the moment.

It was only when we turned off the main road and onto the lane leading up to our destination that I felt the gravity of the situation. Panic set in and I was finding it difficult to breathe once again.

"This is your home?" I asked, hoping I was mistaken.

"You know it is."

I shook my head and looked back at him. "You are Mr. Cullen's nephew." I whispered when I felt like screaming. It was not a question, but a statement of realization. Had I not heard his full name earlier? Had I been so preoccupied with the circumstance that I had not even known the name I now carried as well?

He turned his cold eyes back to mine. "Yes. Edward Cullen, son of Carlisle and Esme Cullen, nephew to Robert Cullen, former owner of this estate. You conveniently neglected to inform me of your name as well, Ms. Swan. It does not escape my notice that this evening's events have benefitted you and your father greatly. You will forgive me if it takes some time to refer to you as a Cullen, since we rarely show the kind of deception and manipulation that you have this day."

I knew then that he believed I had somehow trapped him into this to regain the estate. Certainly he would know who we were after learning our surname. I must find a way to prove my innocence and to make amends for the inconveniences we had caused him. I sat back in my seat, saying nothing more. It would do no good to continue this conversation while he was so angry. Only moments later I looked up to see a sight I had not laid eyes on in nearly four years.

My childhood home.

Collingsworth Hall.


	5. Answers and Questions

**Still don't own anything.**

**This chapter is a little shorter than I wanted, but thought I would go ahead and get it out and write the rest of it into the next chapter.**

**Okay, so I should probably clarify a couple of things since a couple of you have commented about it. I am writing Charlie at about 48-50 years old. He is not physically incapacitated at all, but is just not quite all there mentally. In the last chapter, he threatened Edward with a loaded gun, while Edward was unarmed and feared for his life as well as others. This chapter should help with where his mind was during that whole mess.**

**Soooo….. hope that helps. As always, thank you so much for reading this little tale and for letting me know what you think. Your words are like gold and I can hardly contain my excitement when my phone chimes letting me know another review/favorite/alert has come in. Thank you for encouraging me.**

EPOV

Swan. Her surname was Swan. Isabella Swan, daughter of Charles Swan, previous owner of Collingsworth Hall. My mind was having difficulty comprehending all that had happened in just a few short hours.

When Mr. Swan emerged from the cottage with that firearm, my concern was immediate for not only my own life, but that of my driver and this lovely young woman in my arms. He had no claim on me as a match for his daughter. Even if we had been caught in a truly compromising position, he could make no demand on me to marry his daughter because of his social placement. He obviously was depending on his past fortunes to demand a marriage. Having no way of knowing if he was a violent man, I worried that she may be harmed if I left her behind. However, I was completely unprepared to go through with a ceremony. She had seemed sad and resigned during the vows and I could not help but wipe the tears that fell before she quickly recovered herself. It was as though I could see her construct imaginary walls to protect herself from sadness and pain. I wondered what exactly it was that she had been forced to endure.

Immediately following the ceremony, she was escorted into another room by Mrs. Clearwater and I quickly signed the document. I had every intention of leaving as soon as she emerged. I was frustrated and worried about what else may transpire before I could be gone. It was only when signing the certificate that I had learned the truth of her identity. I was instantly overcome with anger, believing that there had been some plotting for this outcome.

Now, as I watched her fingers twist and pull at the folds in her dress I knew there was no truth to my suspicions. She seemed worried and perhaps even frightened. Not at all the demeanor of a woman who was calculating and manipulative. I certainly had no idea what to think of her. How was it that I could be so furious with her for the outcome of this day, and yet so taken with her beauty that it seemed every glance her way would steal the breath from my body.

But as I sat across from her in my carriage, the one nagging questions remained. Could they have known my identity? Could they have plotted this? Was she truly innocent and as overwhelmed as I was? I could find no answer, and my frustration only added to the anger. I was relieved when we finally reached the manor.

Tyler was waiting and immediately opened the carriage. I stepped out and held my hand out to Isabella, wondering if she would accept my assistance. After a moment's hesitation she reached forward and placed her small hand in mine. I quickly noticed how cold it was. I had been inattentive to her. She was cold and yet asked for nothing. As angry as I might be, I would still be a gentleman, especially in dealing with my… wife.

"Come. You are chilled. I believe you have missed your evening meal and must be hungry as well. We will have some food and get some rest."

She simply nodded and followed beside me into the house. I led her into the library where the fire was waiting for my return this evening. It had certainly ended differently than I had expected.

"Sir, we were not aware we needed to prepare for guests. What would you wish for accommodations for the young lady?" Tyler was looking quickly back and forth from Isabella to me and back again.

Running a hand through my hair, I took a deep breath before addressing him. "Tyler, it would seem that I have acquired a wife today. Please inform the staff that there is now a Mrs. Cullen in residence. As far as accommodations are concerned, I will allow Mrs. Cullen to choose for herself which rooms she prefers. In the meantime, please have a light supper delivered to us here as well as some tea for the lady as quickly as you can. She is cold from the night air and could do with the warmth."

"Certainly, sir." With that, Tyler left the room, presumably to retrieve the tea.

I stood with my back to her looking into the fire and trying uselessly to determine how we were to proceed. Lost in thought for some time, I was a bit startled when I heard her speak.

"I am not sure what I should say or do, Mr. Cullen. I fear anything I say at this moment will cause you further frustration and anger. And as I do not know what sort of man you are, I must admit that I am frightened." She looked at me expectantly.

Turning to face her, I took in her wide, dark eyes, her tightly clenched fists, her stiff stance and the fear that seemed to radiate off of her.

"Isabella, it has been a long day. I would understand if you prefer to not speak of it tonight. You must be exhausted."

I am very tired, Mr. Cullen, but – "

"Edward."

"Pardon me? 

"Edward. We are now husband and wife, Isabella. I would much prefer it if you called me by my given name."

"Of course. I am sorry Edward. As I was saying, I would sleep much better if I could clear up some of the misconceptions between us." I nodded and waited for her to continue.

"Edward, you must know that I had no idea who you were at the time we met. I had not even known that Collingsworth had been occupied until only a few hours before you arrived at our cottage. As for the wedding, Justice Clearwater had a plan in place, but it somehow was overlooked. You were never supposed to sign that document. It would make the vows incomplete without your signature and you would be as free to go from the Clearwater's home as you had been when you woke this morning. Please, you must understand that it was for your safety I feared. There have been other incidents involving my father that have not had good outcomes. I desperately wanted to spare you that difficulty."

She spoke with such earnestness, I could not help but feel the last of my anger melt away. I realized the foolishness of my rash behavior toward her this evening. I now had to find the words to set this right. Taking a deep breath, I offered her my hand. She looked at it briefly before finally raising her head and looking into my eyes. I could only assume that she was trying to discern whether or not I was to be trusted. After a moment, she carefully placed her hand in mine. I was pleased to find that it was no longer cold, but only trembled slightly. I grasped her hand gently and led her to the chair nearest the fire. As she lowered herself into the chair, I knelt before her keeping her hand in mine and my eyes on hers.

"I must ask your forgiveness, Isabella. In my anger and frustration, I have made horrible assumptions and accusations that I know were false. I have heard and believe every word you have said. I have placed you in a very difficult situation."

At my last statement, she began shaking her head vehemently. "Edward, it is I who have caused you difficulty. I am sor – "

I quickly placed a hand up to stop her. "Do not tell me you are sorry. We are both struggling to find our way in this. I am seeking your forgiveness for my treatment of you in the midst of this evening's events. It was unacceptable for me to cause you fear. Will you grant it?"

She lowered her eyes and whispered a quiet answer, "It has already been given. Thank you, Edward."

I tugged gently at her hands to pull her up from the chair. "Come. Tyler has brought food and tea. Eat something before you retire and we can sort this out in the morning."

As we sat at the small table in the center of the room, I uncovered dishes containing some sort of meat pies and vegetables. She poured tea for us both and placed the cloth napkin in her lap. She looked at the plate in front of her and then quickly up at me.

"Isabella? What is it? Do you not care for this? I can have Tyler bring something else if you prefer." She looked down quickly as her brow furrowed and her chin and lower lip began to tremble. "Tell me, please."

She recovered herself quickly, not letting a tear fall and quickly closing herself off as she had during the ceremony earlier. I was almost desperate to know what she was thinking. Finally, she looked up and smiled a weak smile that did not reach her eyes.

"I cannot remember the last time I had a feast such as this. Especially one that I did not have to prepare. Our meals have been much simpler for quite some time. Thank you."

I was stunned. I had not even considered that part of her life. What had given them income? And what sort of life did that afford them? These thoughts led to questions about her father, but I knew she must be utterly exhausted and would be too worn emotionally to have that discussion. I decided to answer her simply.

"You do not have to thank me. This is once again your home. Please make yourself comfortable and ask for anything you need from the staff."

We ate in silence, the only sound being the occasional snapping of the fire and soft clinking of silver on china. When Tyler came to see to the fire and clear away the dishes, Isabella asked where she was to retire. I quickly reminded Tyler that she was to have any room she wished. I turned to Isabella to give her some reassurance before she left the room.

"I will be completing some work in my study before retiring for the night. Please rest as long as you need in the morning. I will have some tea and breakfast sent up for you whenever you wake. As for the rest, well, I suppose we should spend some time tomorrow to determine how we should proceed."

She nodded and answered, "Justice Clearwater will be making inquiries in the morning regarding the possibility of an annulment. I know it will take some time to receive an answer, but I thought perhaps you might like to know. Thank you again for your kindness and understanding, Edward. Good night."

I watched her walk away with Tyler before closing the door and walking over to stand in front of the fire. Watching the embers glow below the yellow and orange flames, I thought about how drastically my life had changed in the course of this day. My mind was full of questions that I still had no answers for. Why had her father pushed to the point of violence for her marriage? What had happened to their fortune that caused their current circumstance to be so dire? How had they been surviving? And possibly the most surprising question: If an annulment was granted, would I even want it? Could I let her go?

I was struck again by the strange need I felt to protect her. To provide for her. When she spoke of the lack of food in their home, I wanted to run to the kitchen and bring back for her every morsel I could find. The thought that she could want for anything was overwhelming. I wanted to give her everything. That thought was the most ironic. I had accused her of plotting to take what I have, when I would gladly give it to her. I was somewhat frightened by the intensity of what I felt.

Knowing that tomorrow would be a long day, I made my way to my study to try and get my mind on something other than the beauty sleeping upstairs. I was hoping that perhaps I could continue looking over the last decade of financial reports for the estate. If the means to track the loss of funds was there, I was sure I could eventually find it. After two hours, I had made no more progress and decided to go to bed. Pushing back my chair, I stretched as I stood and picked up the candle from the edge of the desk and blew the others out.

Once upstairs, I noticed the door at the other end of the hall from my room was closed and knew that she had chosen the room I had believed to be her childhood room. I hoped it would bring her some comfort this night and that she would be able to rest.


	6. Morning and Evening

**I own nothing, but I wish I did.**

**As always, I am so very grateful for the support this story is receiving. Thank you to all of you who have reviewed, favorited and/or alerted this little tale. It is thrilling to know that you are enjoying it. It is also incredible to see the names of writers whose stories I have loved and to know that they are reading my words now. THANK YOU!**

**So, I know you would rather hear from her….**

BPOV

Walking into what had been my rooms for so many years brought back a flood of memories. Almost everything was exactly the same. When the creditors took the estate, we had only a short while to gather a few personal items to take with us. Everything else, including clothing and furnishings were left behind. I could only guess that Edward's uncle had not had the opportunity to redecorate the unused rooms and for this reason, all of my things were still contained in this room.

I ran my hands along the coverlet on the bed, over the footboard and posts, onto the seat placed at the end of the bed. Taking a step forward, I sat down and slowly looked around the room. Soft light coming from the candles and wall sconces, pale blue curtains waving in the gentle breeze at the window, and on the bedside table, sat the small cloth doll my mother had given to me for my 6th birthday.

I could remember bits and pieces about my mother, but she was more involved with society and the latest fashion. She had little time to spare me most days. My father, however, was always available to me. I spent more time with him in his study and the library than I ever spent with my dolls and hairbows, much to my mother's disappointment.

My father. How was he faring? I had not been there to prepare his supper, nor would I be for the meal in the morning. Was he awaiting my return? Did he even realize I was gone? I had no answers and began to worry for him. Perhaps tomorrow I could go to the cottage to retrieve my personal things and check on him.

Morning. I would meet with Edward in the morning to discuss our circumstance and make some plans. I was nervous for what he might be thinking. Suddenly, exhaustion overtook me and I was absolutely worn out and desperately needed some sleep.

Standing, I unbuttoned my dress and slipped it off, along with my shoes and stockings. When I was left in only my chemise, I stretched my body across the bed and fell into a deep, but fitful sleep.

Morning came quickly, and for just a moment as I woke, it seemed the last few years had never happened. However, those thoughts were quickly recovered and I rose from the bed to ready myself for the day. I had only the dress I was wearing yesterday, and I reluctantly put it back on. After spending some time on the rest of my personal needs and appearance, I made my way out to the stairs.

Heading down to the large sitting room on the first floor, I passed the library. It was empty, but had a fire burning brightly. The study a few doors down was empty as well. I wondered whether Edward was awake yet, or if he was a late riser. Entering the sitting room, I was a little surprised to find Edward and another gentlemen in quiet conversation.

Edward was standing near the windows and seemed to be pacing a regular pattern as he spoke. The other man was sitting near the fire and waited patiently for Edward to finish putting his thoughts together. Both men stood and turned in my direction as I stepped into the room.

Edward immediately spoke, "Jasper, this is Isabella Cullen, formerly Swan. Isabella, this is Mr. Jasper Whitlock, my brother in law and closest friend."

I stepped forward into the room and grasped his outstretched hand, which he immediately brought to his lips. Placing a soft kiss on the back of my hand, he spoke to Edward first. "She truly is a beauty, Edward. Isabella, it is a pleasure to meet you."

Of course, I blushed profusely at his words and turned my eyes to the floor in embarrassment. I knew full well how plain and simple my appearance was. I was grateful for his kindness in any case.

Mr. Whitlock was very tall, with blond hair and piercing blue eyes. I wondered if everyone in this family was as handsome as the two men with me in this room. I was uncertain as to how to address Mr. Whitlock. "The pleasure is mine, sir." I had no idea what Edward had told him regarding our situation. He had introduced me as Isabella Cullen, so I was sure that Mr. Whitlock had been informed of our marriage. I turned to glance at Edward for direction on how to proceed with Mr. Whitlock.

Edward was standing directly in front of the fire and was staring intently at me as though he were trying to see my very soul. I cleared my throat and addressed him. "Good morning, Edward."

He seemed to break from his thoughts, meeting my eyes. "Good morning, Isabella. I trust you slept well?"

"Yes, thank you."

There was an awkward silence that followed until Mr. Whitlock finally spoke. "Edward, will you be prepared to leave this morning, or will you need to postpone until this afternoon? I really must get back to my correspondence so that I may bring it to post today."

At his words, Edward shook his head and turned back to face the fire as he answered. "I will be ready this morning. Please inform Tyler that Isabella will be ready for breakfast momentarily and I will join you in the carriage at midmorning." Mr. Whitlock nodded before turning to leave to finish his letters, I presumed. "Oh, and Jasper, please remember to bring my sister's shopping list. Heaven forbid she should arrive and not have all that she requires. I will have my driver take care of it while we are in town."

Mr. Whitlock laughed aloud at this and turned toward the door, calling for Tyler as soon as he exited. As soon as he was gone, Edward spoke. "Isabella, I must go to town this morning to finish some business. I have instructed Tyler that we are not receiving any callers today. I thought it might be easier to figure this out without having to entertain curious neighbors. I have told no one of this situation, save for Jasper, but I have no knowledge of your father's discussions. Do you suppose he has announced our marriage?"

I had not thought that Edward would draw this conclusion. "No, I can assure you that my father has told no one. He does not go to town or speak to anyone except Pastor Webber or Justice Clearwater. But I must admit, I was uncertain how to address our situation with Mr. Whitlock, so I am agreed that it would be easier to not have the worries of entertaining."

Edward nodded and gestured toward the chair indicating that I should sit down. I did so and waited patiently for him to voice his obvious concerns. He brought his hand up and rubbed it roughly across the back of his neck. Finally he looked up and met my eyes. "Isabella, I am uncertain as to how we should proceed. I fear that either way, your reputation will have sustained irreparable damage. If we remain married, it will be assumed that we were caught in a compromising position. If we are granted an annulment, it might appear that I have been displeased with you as a wife and cast you aside. Neither option is particularly beneficial for you."

I could not contain the look of shock I am sure he saw on my face. "Your concern is for my reputation? Sir, you have been threatened with bodily harm and forced into a marriage that you did not want at the possible risk of your reputation and good name, how is it that you can be concerned for mine? My good name ceased to be of any importance when my father and I left this estate to reside in a farmer's cottage. My integrity and conscience have required that I remain pure and blameless, but to my knowledge, it matters to no one else."

He stared intently at me for a moment before finally speaking. At first his voice was quiet, but his words were clear. "It matters to me."

The room was silent for a few moments as I had no words with which to respond. He crossed the room to stand closer as he began to speak again.

"The repercussions are much more far reaching for you, Isabella. If my good name were soiled, I could simply return from whence I came with little care as to the matters here. However, I am not that cold and unfeeling and I cannot help but worry about how you would fare in the aftermath of this."

Listening to his words, I could not help but wonder what it would have been like to have married him without the surrounding circumstances. He was a gentle and caring man and would certainly make a loving husband. I would almost have rather he'd been cold and unfeeling. It would make the separation bearable when the time came. However, knowing the sort of man he was, I feared greatly that I might lose my heart to him. I could feel the thickness build in my throat and the sting of tears in my eyes. I quickly stood and walked toward the window to get myself under control before he noticed how close to breaking down I had been. It would never do to be reduced to tears in front of him. Taking a deep breath, I turned to face him.

"Until we have spoken to Justice Clearwater, there is nothing more to be done. I am hopeful that he will have some word for us today. So until then, enjoy your day with Mr. Whitlock and if you are agreeable, I would very much like to look about the house and grounds. I have missed many things about this house, especially the library."

He smiled widely and nodded. "Please. As I said last night, this is your home for as long as need be. Enjoy all it has to offer. Now, go have some breakfast, and I will return for the evening meal. Perhaps we will have new knowledge by then. And if not, we can simply enjoy each other's company and get to know more about one another."

I smiled in return at his mood and bid him have a good day. He returned the sentiment and left to meet Mr. Whitlock at the carriage. I found Tyler in the dining room and had a bit of breakfast before retrieving a basket and filling it with the remnants of my unfinished morning meal. With basket in hand, I set out to walk the two miles to the cottage to look in on my father.

* * * A H R * * *

Arriving at the cottage in the late morning, I immediately noticed the fire had nearly died out and only a few faintly glowing embers remained. The soup I had prepared for dinner sat untouched still in the pot, and my father was nowhere in sight. Making my way out the back of the cottage, I called out for him. After a few minutes he walked out of the barn, his face breaking into a wide grin.

"There you are, my dear girl. Have you been shopping this morning? You were out early, but I assumed you went to town when I realized the carriage was gone."

"Yes, Papa. I have been out. Are you hungry? I have some fresh bread and fruit inside."

I brought him back inside and set out the items from my basket as well as some tea. As he ate, I gathered the eggs from the barn and tidied up the cottage. I also put away the ladder and mallet that had been left in such a rush the evening before. Returning to the house, I prepared a simple meal and left it on the table ready for my father when he deemed it time for supper this evening. I sat with him for a short while by the fire. He was reading his book while I was mending one of his shirts and the mindless quiet was almost too much for me after the turmoil of the previous day.

As was his routine, my father soon fell asleep by the fire. I put away the mending and scribbled a quick note telling him I was going out and would be back later. He had no concept of time it seemed, so 'later' would be tomorrow when I returned and he would be none the wiser. Quickly gathering my other two dresses, my underclothing and my mother's necklace, I placed them in my basket and made my way out of the cottage. Closing the door gently behind me, I left the cottage and began walking toward the manor.

As I walked, I tried to work out how I could continue to care for my father while living at the manor. My being there was already enough of an imposition, I could not ask Edward to take my father in as well. The only possibility I could entertain was a daily repeat of this day. I would rise and have breakfast with Edward. I would be careful to leave enough of my breakfast that it would provide food for my father as well. I would wait for Edward to attend his business for the day, then go to the cottage to care for my father and the needs of his household. I could take the eggs to town only twice per week and return in the evenings so that Edward was none the wiser. I did not think he would be pleased to know that I was daily caring for the man who had forced him at gunpoint to marry a woman he did not love. But I also could not bring myself to tell him of my father's circumstance. It would be dishonoring to my father and we would be even more pitied in Edward's eyes.

It was that thought that was most disturbing to me. I did not want Edward to pity me. I wanted him to see my strength and know that I would be fine regardless of the outcome of our situation. I wanted him to look upon me with pride and admiration. I wanted him to … It was at that thought I stopped myself from thinking what I might want from Edward. It would come to no good and I would end up hurt. I had spent almost four years now bracing myself against what others thought about me. I could not be vulnerable to Edward's thoughts toward me. I resolved that I would guard against his kindness, gentleness, his mesmerizing green eyes, his soft smile, the way he…. No! I must stop this.

Shaking my head to clear my thoughts I entered the front door of the manor. Closing it behind me, I made my way up the stairs. Inside my room I poured some water from the pitcher into the basin and removed my dress and undergarments. Quickly bathing, I redressed in a clean dress and brushed through my curls before pinning them up again. Checking my appearance one last time, I returned to the first floor and quietly entered the library. Edward was sitting behind the desk across from the fire concentrating on several sheets of what appeared to be accounting information. I watched him study the papers as his brow furrowed and his hand ran repeatedly through his hair. After a few moments, he scrubbed both hands over his face and stood up. As he did, he noticed me standing there for the first time.

"Isabella! I did not hear you enter."

"I did not wish to disturb you."

"You have not disturbed me, but have provided a wonderful distraction. Come and sit and tell me about your day."

I froze. I had no idea what to tell him. I could not tell him I had been to the cottage. He sat on the small sofa and patted the space next to him and waited. I walked over and sat beside him while I tried to think of something to say. His next statement made it obvious he knew where I had been.

"I see you are wearing a different dress. I gather that you retrieved some things from the cottage?"

I nodded and still could not find my words.

"So tell me, how is your father today?" I could not tell if he was truly interested or if he was simply making conversation. I kept my answer simple.

"He is well. We had tea and a short visit."

"I am glad. Please give him my regards when you visit again." I was a little stunned at his words.

"How is it you can be so kind toward my father?"

Edward gave me a small smile and shrugged his shoulders as he answered. "I could not be certain I would not do the same were it my daughter. He deserves at least the benefit of my understanding."

With that simple statement, I felt another piece of my heart left me for him. I knew if I were not careful, it would take very little time before Edward Cullen owned it entirely.


	7. A meal and an Option

EPOV

She was gazing at me with the most wondrous expression. While it was a little unnerving, I resolved I would do almost anything to keep that look on her face. She was a beautiful creature with a strength of character I was only beginning to understand. I found myself anticipating an evening of conversation. I wanted to uncover every bit of knowledge about her. I could only hope that the gentle expression she wore was an indication that she was as intrigued as I was.

Breaking into the quiet moment, Tyler cleared his throat discreetly as he entered the room. "Sir, Mr. Whitlock has sent word that he will be dining with an acquaintance in town this evening. He also would like for you to be informed that he has received correspondence from Mrs. Whitlock stating that she and, in fact, the entirety of your family has been delayed and will arrive on Saturday next. As for supper this evening, it is being prepared to serve as we speak."

"Thank you, Tyler." Turning to Isabella, I offered her my hand. "Are you ready to dine?" Smiling, she took my hand and I led her to the dining room. As soon as we entered, I noticed the placement of the china. Sitting eight chairs on either side from one another would make for difficult interaction over the meal. Pulling out the chair nearest mine at the head of the table, I waited for Isabella to take her seat. She seemed puzzled, but sat

gently in the chair and blushed profusely as she did so. I remembered observing that blush this morning when Jasper had kissed her hand. It was a simple, gentlemanly gesture, but I found myself intensely jealous that his lips had made contact with her skin, even if it was only her hand. I had not had the pleasure of a kiss and she was my wife – even if it was in name only.

I quickly made my way to the other end of the table and retrieved her place setting, laying it again on the table in front of her. She whispered a quiet, "Thank you" and before I could resist, I leaned in close to her ear from behind as I placed her silver and whispered in response.

"You are very welcome, Isabella."

The reddening of her cheeks spread quickly to her neck and below and I found myself imagining just how far that blush reached. She was mesmerizing. Shaking my head, I took my seat and pulled the napkin into my lap.

For the remainder of dinner, I asked her every question I could think to ask. I craved information and was not disappointed. She spoke of being raised in this manor and all of the hiding spots she knew as a child. How she had loved to ride her horse in the late mornings after her lessons, and spent her afternoons in the rose garden pruning and picking the flowers to perfection. How she loved to open a book and lose herself in the pages, being transported to times and places she had never experienced. How she had lost her mother at the tender age of 14, and then her home only two years later.

"Isabella, do you have any knowledge about your father's business affairs?"

"None at all. My father felt it was not the place of a young lady to know the business affairs of the estate. He said I only need concern myself with pretty dresses and ribbons. The first moment I knew something was amiss was the day we were escorted from the estate. I had a very sudden introduction to the financial responsibilities of running a home."

I was perplexed to say the least. Did she mean that her father simply ceased to take any responsibility for the welfare of himself and his daughter? "I am not sure I understand your meaning. Was your father incapable of seeing to the financial requirements of your home?"

Her eyes darted to mine, widening briefly before she looked down at the table, frowning. When she looked up, her face was once again a controlled mask covering the emotion beneath. "I simply meant that it was easier for me to take on the responsibility. There was no longer any need for me to concern myself with ribbons and finery."

She was more reserved in her answers after that and I knew that somehow I had caused her distress. After a while, we retired to the library. Sitting across from each other before the fire, I found great enjoyment in watching her choose a book and settle in to begin reading. Her eyes were alight with excitement and occasionally her brow would furrow, then a smile would tug at the corner of her mouth. She was as animated in her expression as she was in telling a story.

A knock at the door startled us both and we turned to see Tyler once again in the doorway.

"Sir, Justice Clearwater has arrived and asked to see you. I have informed him that you were not receiving callers, but he insisted you would see him as it was a matter of some importance."

I had already begun waving him off as he finished speaking. "It is fine, Tyler. We have been expecting to hear from him. Please show him in and bring some tea."

I glanced over to where Isabella had been sitting. She was now up and pacing in front of the hearth. I knew she was nervous, but I had no words of comfort for her in that moment. It seemed the silence was eternal until finally Justice Clearwater entered the room followed by Tyler carrying the tray with the tea service. Placing it on the table near the fire, he quickly retreated, closing the door behind him.

Isabella spoke first. "Justice Clearwater, would you care for some tea?" She asked as she poured a cup and held it out to him. He smiled and nodded his thanks, taking the cup and saucer from her. She poured another and offered it to me. I reached for it with one hand, giving her fingers a gentle squeeze with my other hand before gesturing for her to sit. She poured herself a cup and sat down on the sofa. Waiting until our guest had seated himself, I sat beside her. I could feel her slight tremble as her nerves seemed to get the better of her. Finally, Justice Clearwater began to speak.

"I apologize for intruding on your evening, but I have some information regarding your, ah, situation. I have heard from the County Justice. He has declined the annulment." At his words, I heard the soft gasp next to me and felt the trembling increase. Her cup was rattling noisily on the saucer. I reached over and took it from her hands and placed it on the table beside the sofa. She looked down at her hands and spoke in a quivering voice.

"Is there nothing to be done, then? Mr. Cullen is forced to remain in this marriage?"

I found her choice of words intriguing. Was she not forced to remain my wife as well? The depth of her selflessness was stunning. Before I could give more thought to her response, the Justice spoke again.

"There is one more appeal that can be made, and in fact, I have already set that request in motion. We should know something before the end of the month. However, I must tell you, in all honesty, I do not think it will be granted. Have you considered the possibility of leaving circumstances as they are?"

At his inquiry, Isabella rose from her seat and turned to face the fire. Her back was toward us as she spoke. "How can I ask Mr. Cullen to cease his pursuit of freedom. I have forced him into a life he does not desire. Though it was certainly unintentional, it is against his wishes and I have nothing to offer him in return, except this. I can only offer the chance to make it right. Please do not ask me to consider leaving it be!"

She was visibly shaking by the time she finished speaking. Justice Clearwater rose and shook my hand silently as he gestured toward the door, indicating he would see himself out. Once he had left the room and the door was once again closed, I carefully approached her.

"Isabella?"

She turned to face me. The look of devastation on her face as well as the tears pooling in her eyes were my undoing. Without thinking it through, I pulled her into my arms and held her tightly against me. I knew her concern was for the imposition she believed she had caused me, but the thought that I had done or felt anything that would cause her tears was almost more than I could bear. I held her as the shaking slowed and eventually stopped. She never made a sound, and when she finally pushed gently against my chest, I released her and she stepped quickly away. She had once again stubbornly reigned in her tears and had her emotional mask back in place. Taking a deep breath, she brought her eyes up to meet mine.

"I am so very sorry. I cannot tell you how sorry I am."

I put my hand up to stop her. "We knew there was every possibility that the annulment would not be granted. Now we must determine how best to proceed. My family will be here in eight days and the Winter Ball will follow only seven days after their arrival. I fear that your absence from your father's home will raise questions, so we must consider how best to make the announcement of our marriage. I would prefer that the announcement were made prior to the Ball, so that it might be our first social event as husband and wife."

As I finished speaking, her eyes were wide and a panicked look spread across her delicate features. She opened her mouth to speak, only to close it and repeat the process several times. Finally, she was able to voice her thoughts.

"You would keep me as your wife? You would announce it? How is it you are willing to do so? You hardly know me and you have no idea if your family will approve. I have no dowry and nothing of any significance to offer you." Her panic was building with every word.

I knew in that moment that I could never send her away. If, by some strange turn of events, the annulment were granted, I would let her go if she chose to leave. But I would never willingly send her away. I had known her barely two days and yet I could not deny that her presence in my home, and in fact, in my life, was a perfect fit. I would find a way to make her realize it as well. I stepped forward and took her hands in mine.

"Isabella, stop. We have done nothing wrong so there is no hesitation to announce our marriage. I understand your reservation and fears. Let us make an agreement. We will spend the next seven evenings together, a form of courtship, if you will. On the eighth day, my family will arrive and will meet my wife. I have every confidence they will adore you. If you are agreeable, we will make our announcement and the spectacle that is the Winter Ball will also serve as our inaugural social event."

"And what of the annulment?"

"Well, if the annulment is granted, we will reconsider our arrangement and determine how to proceed with that circumstance. Are you agreeable?"

"It seems I have no other option."

I gently cupped her chin in my hand, raising her face so that I could clearly see her eyes. As soon as I had her gaze, I spoke slowly and plainly. "I have no other option to offer you. In fact, Isabella, even if I did, this is the option I truly want you to consider."

Her sharp intake of breath was the indication that I needed to be certain she understood me. I had realized while holding her in my arms that if the circumstances were different and it were possible, I would have already sought out her father's permission to court her. Leaning in, I placed a soft kiss on her forehead before releasing her chin from my grasp, and turning toward the door.

"Sleep well, Isabella. I look forward to tomorrow." I did not turn to see her expression as I left the room, and I regretted not being able to know her reaction. However, I knew if I had looked back I would not have been able to restrain myself and would certainly have sought out a kiss much less chaste than the one I had placed on her forehead. At least now I had achieved more than Jasper.

In any case, I now had plans to set in motion. I would need to have Isabella find a gown, as well as prepare her for the whirlwind that was my family. I would also need to speak to Tyler about the dining arrangements for the evening meals. I would certainly need something more romantic than the separation of the formal dining table. There was much to think about and I had every confidence that if I could breach the emotional walls she kept in place to protect herself, I could win her heart.


	8. Discussion and a Dress

**Still don't own anything… still wish I did.**

**You are all overwhelming with your kind words and encouragement. Thank you so much for supporting this story. **

**So… let's see what Bella thinks of Edward's intentions….**

BPOV

I have no idea how long I stood staring at the door. At some point, Tyler entered to turn down the lamps and see to the fire. It seemed my mind could not register anything but his quietly spoken words…..

"…_.courtship….they will adore you….I truly want you to consider….look forward to tomorrow…."_

How was I to respond. I was going to lose my heart to him, if I had not already done so. It was certain to happen and if I were honest, it terrified me.

I could not stand here all night. I picked up a candlestick from the nearest table and bid Tyler good night before making my way up to my room. I would not fret about it any more tonight. Tomorrow would be a full day and I would need a well rested, clear head to keep my wits about me. Changing into my nightgown, I crawled into bed before blowing out the candle. It took me no time to drift into a dreamless sleep

* * * A H R * * *

Once again, the morning sun was shining brightly in my window. I rose and readied myself for the day. As eager as I was to see Edward, my nerves were also getting the best of me. I sat on the edge of the bed for a while as my mind and heart both willed me to find the courage to face him. Finally, when my hunger could no longer be denied, I rose and went downstairs to join him in the dining room.

Edward looked up and immediately stood as I entered the room. "Good morning, Isabella. I trust you slept well?"

"Yes, thank you. And how did you rest?" I sat in the chair Edward had pulled out for me and placed my napkin in my lap as he pushed the chair forward.

"I rested very well, thank you. I need to see to some of the farmers on the East side of the estate, so I will be out of the house for quite some time today. If you have plans for the day, Jasper will be going into town again. I am certain he can offer you transport should you need it."

"Thank you. I am unsure of my plans yet." The conversation to this point had been benign if not a little formal and awkward. I looked up at Edward as it had gotten quiet. He seemed to be trying to work out how to say something. Finally, he looked up with a more confident and resolved expression.

"Isabella, as you know, the Winter Ball is in a couple of weeks. I understand that it may take some time to have a gown constructed, so I thought perhaps you would like to see the dressmaker today."

I am certain the look of surprise and my gaping mouth were what caused his quiet chuckle. He sipped his tea, watching me over the rim of his cup for a moment before continuing. "I also hoped you could confer with Mrs. Cope regarding a menu for the Ball as well as general meal preparations and supplies. Have you yet made her acquaintance?"

"Edward, those are household preparations. They are generally – "

"Handled by the lady of the house? Yes, they are. Isabella, at this moment, you are the lady of this house." He reached for my hand, taking it firmly in his and leaning forward to capture my gaze. "You are my wife, and as such you are entitled to the honor and respect that comes with that position. It also carries the responsibility of overseeing the household. Tyler takes care of most things, but there are issues I would much prefer that you see to."

I did not know how to respond. It seemed he was serious about moving forward and I must decide whether it was what I wanted as well. Meeting his eyes, I could see nothing but concern and sincerity. Dropping my eyes to the table, I gave him a small nod. There was silence for a long moment until I could stand it no longer and had to look up. As I did, he smiled widely – a genuine, sweet smile, and gently squeezed my hand before releasing it to pick up his cup once again.

"So, you see the dressmaker today and we will meet together with Mrs. Cope this evening after her dinner preparations are completed. Once introductions have been made, I will leave you to it. Is this acceptable?"

"Yes, of course. Then we will not be spending time together this evening?" The thought saddened me as I realized I had already begun to look forward to my time with him.

His brow furrowed, then his eyes widened as he understood the situation. "We will certainly be spending the evening together! I will instruct Mrs. Cope to be brief if I must, but I am not willing to give up your sweet company for the entire evening, Mrs. Cullen. For now, I must be away."

He stood and stepped around my chair to stand behind me. Leaning down, he leaned in close placing his lips near my ear and spoke. "I will anticipate your company until we are together this evening, Isabella. Have a pleasant day." He laid a gentle kiss to my cheek and was gone. It took some time again to compose myself and I wondered if I would ever recover from the effect he had on me or if I even wanted to recover.

Knowing I had much to accomplish today, I wrapped my unfinished breakfast in my napkin and carried it with me to my room. Placing it in my basket, I pinned my hair more firmly and looked in the wardrobes until I found a shawl. I knew it would be late afternoon and the air would be cooling by the time I returned. Reaching into the top drawer of the chest, I pulled out the handkerchief that held my mother's pendant.

The weight of it was heavy in my hand this morning. I could not bring myself to look at it. It would be too painful to part with it, and part with it I must. I would need a gown for the ball. Edward had all but insisted I see the dressmaker about one today. He seemed determined that I would remain his wife, but I knew at any moment we might have word that the annulment would be granted and he would be free. I did not want to owe him more than I could ever repay, including the cost of a new gown. I also knew that my everyday dresses were much too plain and threadbare for the wife of a man like Edward. If I were to meet his family, I could not disgrace him by doing so in my plain, worn dresses. If I could get a good price from Mr. Banner, I might be able to afford fabric to make some new everyday dresses as well as a gown for the Ball.

Placing it in my basket, I made my way out of the estate unnoticed and began the walk to the cottage.

* * * A H R * * *

Arriving at the cottage, I quickly placed the food from my basket on the table in preparation for my father's meal. He was puttering around outside and waved as I went to gather the eggs. There were fewer eggs today and I knew the chickens were slowing down for the winter months. It was always this way when it grew colder. At least it would make the next few weeks a bit easier if I did not have to make as many trips into town to deliver the eggs to the market.

Returning to the house, I placed the eggs in my basket along with the ones I had gathered previously. My father was enjoying his breakfast, so I quickly prepared another meal for him and left it covered at the other end of the table. I would need to leave very soon to complete my errands in town and make it back to the estate before Edward arrived.

"Papa, would you mind if I went into town today? I need to see the dressmaker concerning my gown for the Ball."

His eyes lit up as he looked at me. "Of course, dear girl. I look forward to seeing your lovely finery. What color have you chosen?"

"I think perhaps blue will be my best color. What do you think of it?"

"I think you will be a beauty in any color, my dear. Go, enjoy your afternoon of ribbons and lace. I will find something to entertain myself in your absence."

I stood and kissed the top of his head before gathering my basket and shawl. I could spend more time with him tomorrow and perhaps take care of the laundry, cleaning and bake some bread. It seemed I would be doubly busy now that I had agreed to take on overseeing the household for Edward. Perhaps I should consider saving a portion of my evening meal to bring to my father as well. It would save a small amount of time that I could spend with him rather than in the kitchen.

My thoughts were running rapidly through my mind as I tried to work out how to accomplish all that I would need to get done. At least the walk into town passed quickly as my thoughts were occupied elsewhere.

* * * A H R * * *

"Miss Swan, are you certain you wish to do this? I can't help but think you will be distraught at some point with your decision."

"Yes, I am certain." I could not give him more of a response as I knew I would be reduced to tears if I dwelt on it too long. I retrieved my handkerchief from the table, leaving the pendant in his hands. He pulled a slip of paper from his pocket and wrote on it briefly before passing it to me.

"Is this an agreeable amount?" He asked, not taking his eyes from the jewels in his hand.

The number was much more than I had expected to see, and I suspect it was more than the item was actually worth.

"Mr. Banner, I cannot –"

"I remember seeing this pendant grace your mother's neck on many occasions, Miss Swan. She was a beautiful woman," he looked up at me then, "and you look so much like her. I grieve for the circumstance you find yourself in, dear girl. You deserve much more than life has offered. Please accept that amount. I would double it if I were able."

I could not speak for the knot in my throat, so I simply nodded and turned my gaze to the floor. His kindness was overwhelming and was something I was beyond grateful for.

"Would you like me to add the amount to your account, or do you have another purpose for the income?" He wrapped the pendant in a soft cloth and turned to enter it into his ledger.

"I will need the currency this time. I have another purpose for it. Thank you, sir, for your kindness and generosity."

He waved his hand as if to stop my words. We were silent as he collected the funds and placed them in a small pouch. Placing the pouch in my hand, he gave it a slight squeeze before releasing it and turning away. I quickly made my way out of the shop and into the fresh air. The sense of loss and grief was threatening to overtake me, and I had no desire to fall to tears publicly. After a few deep breaths, I was able to finally able to regain my composure and began to walk toward the dressmaker's shop.

Glancing up as I neared the shop, the first thing to catch my eye was the sapphire blue gown that was still in the window. It was almost too much to hope that I might be able to afford something that lovely. Entering the shop, I immediately noticed Mrs. Mallory and Lauren near the back of the store. They were enjoying a conversation with Mrs. Crowley, the shop owner. Lauren turned her head in my direction for a moment before looking away and then turning back toward her mother. I missed my friend and could not help but let a bit of melancholy creep back into my mood.

Mrs. Crowley, upon seeing me, turned and greeted me warmly. "Miss Swan, it is a pleasure to see you. Have you been well?"

Yes, Ma'am. I am well. And you?"

She smiled back at me and nodded. "I am perfectly well, thank you. What can I do for you today?"

I found that I was nervous as to my response. She would know I could not normally afford a ball gown and yet she was the only one who could provide the item. I must choose my words carefully.

"I have come to purchase a dress for the Winter Ball."

I could see the confusion on her face and knew the inevitable questions would follow. I immediately tried to answer them before they were asked.

"I have been asked to purchase a gown for a gentleman's wife. Having the same figure, the gown could be fitted to me. I can complete any smaller alterations that will need to be done."

I held my breath, hoping she would accept my truthful, if not vague explanation. After only a moment, she nodded and asked what I would like see. Of course, there was no hesitation as I answered.

"The blue gown nearest the window, please."

She smiled and laughed. "I had a feeling. I saw you admiring it a few days ago." Her smile faded a little as she continued, "I would have given anything to dress you in it for the Ball, Miss Swan."

"Thank you, Mrs. Crowley. It would always be an honor for me to wear your gowns." I had no other opportunity to think of an appropriate response. She quickly instructed me to go to the changing rooms while she had her young employee retrieve the dress. It only took a few minutes it seemed until I found myself standing in front of a mirror wearing the stunning garment.

It was the deepest sapphire blue silk with tiny pearl buttons from the neckline to the small of my back. The neckline was square with the softest of cream colored chiffon gathering around the edge. The waistline was high, as was the preferred fashion of the day, placed just under my breasts and adorned with a satin ribbon in the same shade of cream. Mrs. Crowley stood behind me and just to the right with her hand covering her mouth.

"You are the image of your mother. Such a beauty you are, Miss Swan." Her words were whispered, but were a loud boost to my confidence. Perhaps I could make Edward proud wearing this gown. My mind began to race with the hope that I might impress him with my appearance. It would be more than I could hope to see a look of amazement on his face. It was the dream of a young girl… the same dream I had four years ago as I was preparing for my first season… a season I would never see.

Mrs. Crowley broke into my thoughts as she handed me ribbons to accompany the dress. "These would be lovely braided or woven into the hair. They compliment the gown beautifully. Will you need slippers as well?"

An hour later, I had a gown, slippers, and fabric for two more dresses. After all my purchases, I still had as much in my pouch as I had earned from my trade of my grandmother's comb. I would tuck that income away as it seemed my future was still somewhat uncertain. Although, I had an option to consider at Edward's request. I was mulling this over in my thoughts, paying no attention to my surroundings as I exited the shop, running directly into Mr. Whitlock.

He smiled as he steadied me. "Good afternoon, Isabella. Have you accomplished all of your shopping?"

"Good afternoon, Mr. Whitlock. I have had a successful trip, yes. Have you business in town this evening as well, or will we have the pleasure of your company at supper?"

He laughed loudly before responding. "I have completed my meetings, and will be dining at Collingsworth this evening, but my company will be very unwelcome at your table."

I was appalled. "Mr. Whitlock, it is not my intention to preclude you from enjoying meals with Mr. Cullen. I have – "

He shook his head, smiling as he interrupted my response. "Isabella, your husband would very much like to spend a romantic evening in your company. Having been married only a few months myself, I understand his request. It does not offend me in the slightest. And please, address me by my given name. We are family after all. Now, may I offer you a ride home?"

"Thank you, Mr….Jasper, but I would like to visit with a friend before returning to the estate."

"Very well, at least allow me to deliver your packages for you. I will see them safely to your rooms."

He took my purchases and had them loaded into the carriage as we said our farewells. I had been stunned at his honest response. Did he believe my marriage to Edward was genuine? I had not considered that he was a member of Edward's family and yet was kind and understanding of my sudden appearance in the life of his brother in law. My confusion seemed to grow at every turn.

Steeling my nerves for the conversation I knew would come, I headed to the home of Pastor and Mrs. Webber. I hoped to seek their advice on my situation. Considering they knew of Mr. Cullen and of my father's issues, I believed they could offer me solid counsel on how to proceed. I was dismayed when I arrived at their home only to find they were out for the day making visits.

Glad that I had sent my packages with Mr. – Jasper, I began the four mile walk back to the estate.


	9. A spy and supper

**Still don't own it…still wish I did.**

**Sooo…. Edward…**

EPOV

Hours. It had been almost two hours since I had arrived home and there was still no word from Isabella. I knew she had been in town today. I had sent her there to seek out the dressmaker in preparation for the Winter Ball. I had hurried home anticipating seeing her and hearing of her adventures, but she had not yet returned. I assumed her arrival would be any moment and went to my study to complete some correspondence. A short time later, Jasper arrived and seemed agitated. We retired to the library where he gave me a disturbing account of his afternoon.

"_I saw her as she walked out of the market. She was carrying a basket and I thought for a moment she might fall to tears. She was obviously distressed about something. After a moment, she seemed to regain herself and walked to the dress shop. I did not follow inside as it seemed rather inappropriate. She did make purchases there."_

_I was glad to know she had chosen a gown for the Ball. I could not help but be curious about it. I hoped she chose not for economy, but for her heart's desire. "Did you happen to see her choices?" _

"_No, but that is the curious thing, Edward. She purchased her choices with currency, not store account. Did you provide her with income this morning?"_

"_I did not. How did she come to it?" I had not given her that option this morning. I had made the assumption that she would make her purchase and I would settle the account with the shop owner. It was just how transactions were done. It afforded a lady the luxury of purchasing what she needed without having to concern herself with handling currency. It fell to her father or husband to take care of her and provide for her needs. I could not fathom from where her currency had come._

_I felt my insides twist when Jasper gave me the next bit of information._

"_After she refused my offer to see her home, I went back to the market and spoke with Mr. Banner. I am afraid I may have spoken out of turn. Without thinking, I referred to her as Mrs. Cullen. Once I explained of whom I spoke, he corrected her name to Miss Swan. At this point, I informed him I misspoke and, of course, I meant Miss Swan. He informed me that he regularly purchases eggs and the occasional personal item from her, usually in exchange for household goods and groceries."_

"_And today? What did she sell and for what did she exchange?" I could not fathom that she would have sold something from the estate. Certainly, she would have just asked for the income before attempting something such as that. But it would suit her character that she would sell an item of her own to cover an unexpected expense. I could not decide if it would be a selfless act or if it had been done because she was too prideful to ask. I quickly determined that what I knew of her claimed that it was definitely selflessness._

"_Mr. Banner would not divulge what the item was, only that he was sorrowful to have seen her part with it. He also stated that, of course, she had brought her usual eggs, although there were less of those than he would normally purchase from her. What are you thinking Edward?"_

"_She must have been to her father's cottage. It would certainly explain the eggs. Jasper, I must admit, I am at a loss as to how to deal with her. I find that I am more enamored of her every moment that passes, and yet she does not seem to return any sentiment other than worry over her imposition in my life. How am I to proceed?"_

_He laughed loudly at me before regaining himself and then thinking for a moment before answering. "Edward, you are beyond enamored. I believe you are well on your way to loving this woman beyond all reason. I feel I must caution you in this. She is afraid, that much is obvious."_

"_I have given her no reason to fear me."_

"_I did not mean to imply that you had. It is not you she fears. It is the uncertainty of her circumstance, the unknown future for her father, and above all else, she fears the loss of her heart to a man that she feels she has imposed marriage upon. You are a savior of sorts to her. You are the life she lost four years ago. You are the culmination of all the hopes and dreams she had as a young girl and she fears that once she loses you, she will have no hope left to hold to."_

_The air left my lungs in a rush. My words came out in a whisper. "Jasper… how could I mean that much to her… she hardly knows me." It was a great weight to have that much hold over someone. Surely she could not…._

"_Edward, I do not even think she realizes how much you mean to her. She watches you with great anticipation, it would be amusing were it not for her circumstances. The crucial point here is her trust. I believe she wants to love you, but she does not yet trust you with her heart. This is what you must work to earn Edward. That is, of course, if that is what you desire as well."_

_I chuckled darkly at his words. "We must not speak of what I truly desire, Jasper."_

"_That is exactly what I thought."_

Now, two hours later, I still had no idea where she was, but at least I had a better understanding of her day. This only caused me to be more at war with myself. Was it better that I let her be regarding her transactions in town? Would it be a relief to her to discuss her financial situation or would it cause her embarrassment? I was at a loss and feared I would make a wrong step if I could not come to terms before she arrived home.

I was brought out of my musings when the door to the library flew open and in rushed a small mop of blond hair and bright blue eyes. Mrs. Cope's youngest son, Riley. "Misser Cullen, Mama say Missa Bella just came home!"

Jasper and I both chuckled as he turned immediately and ran out. Jasper stood and clapped his hand over my shoulder. "Well, that is my cue to head to the kitchen. Mrs. Cope promised me an apple tart tonight. I plan to indulge in as much dessert as I am able before sweet Alice arrives and stops my fun. Good night, Edward."

As he walked out, I tried to remember what Riley had just called her….Missa Bella, was it? Bella…. Beautiful…. Bella…. My Beauty…. My Bella. It fit her perfectly. I wondered how she might respond to a name such as that. Would she appreciate an abbreviation of her name, even as a term of endearment? I would be careful to determine her feelings on the matter.

It was about fifteen minutes before she joined me in the sitting room. I had directed Tyler to have our evening meals presented at a small table there. It was a much more personal setting and I wanted to have her all to myself without the prying eyes of my staff.

She was wide eyed with a worried look as she entered. Her voice was almost a whisper when she spoke. "Good evening, Edward. Please forgive me for being so late. I hope I have not delayed any plans you have for the evening."

"My plans for the evening all involve you, Isabella, so they are at your mercy." She immediately dropped her eyes to stare at the floor and her brow furrowed into a frown. I crossed the floor to her in an instant. Lifting her chin with my fingers, I waited until she met my gaze before speaking. "I am not angry. I only meant that I would not begin without you, and while I have been waiting, I am so very glad that you are home safely."

Granting me a small, hesitant smile, she simply said, "Thank you." I reached for her hand and taking it in mine, found it cold as ice.

"You are freezing! Come sit a moment by the fire. Isabella, why did you not take a carriage into town? It is much to cold to be walking. Truth be told, I would rather not see you walking to town at all. There are several carriages at your disposal. I insist that you make use of them." As I spoke, I drew her to the fire, keeping her hands in mine, rubbing gently. I desperately wanted to wrap her in my arms to help remove the chill, but feared she would be overwhelmed.

When Tyler came to inquire about our supper, I directed him to move the table closer to the fire as well as to bring a shawl for Isabella. He did as I asked and left the room for a brief time to retrieve the shawl. I quickly wrapped it around her shoulders before reclaiming her cold hands.

"Are you hungry? You hardly ate any breakfast and I am sure you have had a busy day. Have a seat, and we can discuss our day while Tyler sees to dinner." We were seated and Tyler and Mrs. Cope brought our meal. There was silence until Tyler finished and closed the doors behind him as he left the room. I turned my eyes back to her and asked, "How was your shopping? Were you successful at the dressmaker's shop?"

"Yes, I found the most lovely gown. Would you like to see it?"

"I would very much like to see it. But only on the night of the Ball as I am sure it will adorn you beautifully and I wish to have the privilege of anticipation."

She blushed a stunning shade of pink as I spoke. I could not resist and reached out to run a single finger down her cheek. "I adore this blush, My Bella."

She looked up, surprised at my words.

"Do you not like it? I will continue to call you Isabella if you prefer. I only thought it –"

"I like it very much." Her voice was so quiet as she spoke that I very nearly missed it. When I realized what she said, as well as the lovely shade of pink that once again tinted her skin, I could not help but grin at her.

"Very well, My Bella, please continue with your adventures from the day."

"I really had no other big adventures. Just a bit of shopping. I did stop in to see Pastor and Mrs. Webber, but their housekeeper informed me that they were making visits. Tell me of your day."

"Just business. A very dull day indeed. I made the acquaintance of some of the tenant farmers that I had yet to meet, and spoke with them regarding crops and rotations for the coming seasons. I met with an advisor regarding investments for the estate. I must say, I am glad to be finished with it for the day. Now, enough of this or I will surely find slumber early this evening. So, what would you care to discuss?"

She pushed her silver away on her plate and sipped her tea a moment, clearly in thought. Finally she spoke. "I would like to know about your family. I have only met Jasper, and I know he is married to your sister, Alice. Other than that, I know nothing about them or the rest of your family."

"Have you finished?" I asked, nodding toward her plate. When she answered that she was indeed done with her meal, I sighed. "Bella, I wish you would eat more. You have walked several miles today and have not eaten enough to keep up your strength." When she gave no response, I stood from my chair. "Very well, shall we talk on the sofa?"

I pulled out her chair and she allowed me to take her hand and lead her to the sofa. We sat comfortably and I turned to face her, once again taking her hand in mine.

"My parents are Carlisle and Esme Cullen. They reside most of the year at Whitfield Hall, but spend summers at their estate in Heathridge. I have an older brother, Emmett. His wife is Rosalie and they have a daughter, Emma. They are still in residence at Whitfield as well, but I suspect my father is planning for them to take residence at Heathridge before the start of the next Season. Jasper and Alice have their own estate, Brandon Hall. It is less than half a day's ride, so Jasper came early to assist me with the legalities of taking over Collingsworth. Alice has been visiting my parents and will be arriving with them next week."

"You spent your childhood at Whitfield?"

"I did. The estate is spectacular. I look forward to having you accompany me there. My mother will dote on you without end."

"Are you close to your mother?"

"Yes. She saw that we had the best tutors, but insisted on staying involved the lives of all of her children. She refused to place us in the care of a governess. We are naturally close – all of us."

She looked troubled and I waited for her to formulate her question. When none was forthcoming, I pressed. "What is troubling you?"

She looked up at me with worry evident in her eyes. "There are so many. How can you be confident they will approve? They have no knowledge that you have been married and I am sure to be a shock."

"I know my family, Bella. They are fiercely loyal and very loving. I am afraid that once they arrive, I will no longer have the pleasure of your company. They will, for all intents and purposes, steal you from me."

She giggled and the sound sent me over the moon. It was the first time I had heard it and instantly resolved to hear it as often as I was able. She seemed so lighthearted in that moment that I could not help my response to her. Leaning in, I gently placed my fingertips at her jaw and drew her toward me, unable to pull my gaze from her soft pink lips. I could feel her warm breath on my cheek and glanced up at her eyes. They were wide with uncertainty. I could not proceed with uncertainty being her response. I turned her head ever so slightly and placed a kiss on her cheek just aside the corner of her mouth. Withdrawing from her, I could not help but smirk at her look of confusion and … longing? It was exactly the emotion I had hoped to see in her eyes.

She blinked twice and looked away, that lovely blush creeping up once again. When she finally spoke, her voice was breathless. "I th-think I should retire for the evening. Thank you for tonight, Edward."

I stood as she did and walked a few steps toward the door with her. Once we reached the threshold, I stopped, took her hand in mine and bringing it to my lips, I looked into her eyes before speaking. "Thank you for a wonderful evening, My Bella." Placing a kiss on her hand, I watched her eyes grow wide and that ever present blush once again grace her skin. I released her hand and she all but ran from the room.

I stood in the doorway until I heard the door to her room open and then shut again. Minutes later, Tyler came in to clear the remains of supper away.

"I trust supper was satisfactory, Mr. Cullen?"

"Absolutely, Tyler. Thank you for your assistance this evening. I wonder if I could ask for your help in the morning."

He stopped gathering the dishes and turned to face me. "I am at your service, sir."

"Tyler, I am certain that Mrs. Cullen will be off on another outing in the morning. Whether or not she will use a carriage remains to be seen. I must go to town first thing in the morning and will be taking an early breakfast. Please make sure that Mrs. Cullen has something to eat before she leaves the estate. I am concerned that her worry has kept her from proper nourishment."

"I will take care of her for you, sir. She is a lovely girl."

"Thank you, Tyler. Good night."

I heard him offer his wish for a good night as I made my way from the room. I was determined to keep her healthy and safe. I could guarantee that she would go to her father's cottage in the morning. I had no issue with her visiting her father, but my suspicion was that she was going there to complete household work. I had no desire to see her work herself ragged when there was no need. If nothing else, I could provide him some household help which would allow her to truly spend her time there enjoying her father's company. He was now my family as well and I felt the need to provide for him as much as his pride would allow.

The decision being made, I would go into the market tomorrow, then bring a gift, a peace offering of sorts, to Mr. Swan at his cottage.


	10. Roses and Thorns

**Still don't own anything, but Edward completely owns me.**

**Thank you to all of you who are reading this story. I am thrilled to hear how much you are enjoying it and what your thoughts and theories are.**

**So, I am excited about this chapter. I hope you are too.**

BPOV

I could not sleep. I had expected him to be angry at my being late to arrive for supper. I did not expect his worry and concern. He was insistent about my welfare, even going so far as to nearly demand that I travel by carriage when leaving the estate. I could not fathom his kindness and generosity. It was stirring in me things that I dared not dream. Being cared for and cherished by him was not something I could allow myself to hope for. When this ended, I would return to my father's cottage and he would be free to marry the woman of his choice. Even if the annulment was not granted, he would grow to resent me for forcing him into this marriage. I could live with either outcome as long as I did not hope for him to love me. Hope can be a dangerous and deadly thing.

The trouble was that I wanted to hope. I wanted to hear his sweet words and know his kindness. I had so wanted him to kiss me when he sat with me by the fire tonight. I had thought for a moment that he would. He caught himself before he did something he would regret, and I was glad he would not have to live with that mistake. But it did not change my disappointment.

The words and thoughts seemed to spin constantly in my mind and would not allow sleep to come. Finally giving up, I rose from the bed and went to the kitchen to perhaps find some warm milk to soothe and relax my mind and body.

The house was quiet and mostly dark. The hearth was ablaze in the kitchen and Mrs. Cope was sitting by the warmth of the fire peacefully working her needle through a piece of fabric. She stood as soon as I entered the room.

"Is there something you need, Mrs. Cullen? Perhaps something to eat?"

"Thank you, Mrs. Cope. I am only looking for a cup of milk."

She immediately sought out a cup and set it on the small work table. She poured milk into a small kettle and set it over the fire. Moments later, she poured it into the cup and offered it to me. It took her very little time to prepare and set it before me.

"You are very efficient in your duties."

"I try to be, Ma'am. It would not do for me to be slowing down you supper."

"Mr. Cullen asked me to confer with you regarding the menu for the Ball and for the regular household meals. However, you are most competent and I am certain I could not offer any thing of importance to your abilities."

"Mrs. Cullen, I would be thrilled to settle these responsibilities with you. I am sure it is only guidance he wishes you to offer. He is a kind and sincere man and it is a pleasure to be in his employ."

"Very well, perhaps you could list what you have settled so far and I will offer suggestions for the rest. How would that be?"

"Thank you, Ma'am. I look forward to it."

The room was quiet then as she went back to her needlework and I found comfort in my soothing drink. It was late and there were no sounds in the house. Believing everyone to be asleep, I made my way from the kitchen and to the windows in the conservatory that overlook the rose garden.

My mother spent hours in that garden. I had often worked beside her, pruning and training the trellis into beautiful bushes with more blooms than should have been possible. It was sad to look upon now. It was overgrown and spindly. I was certain it would take more than one season to bring it back to its former glory.

"It has incredible potential. It just needs tender hands to care for it."

The sound of his voice stunned me. I had not heard him approach. Turning, I took in his appearance. His shirt was untucked from his breeches and his feet were bare. His hair looked as though he had been running his fingers through it nonstop. Looking up, I caught his amused smirk as he observed me scrutinizing his very casual attire. However, his words struck a chord with me and I could not determine if he were speaking of the roses or our relationship.

"The thorns may be too much for one to bear to have nothing of beauty in the end."

He seemed amused by my response. "There will always be thorns, but the beauty is there as well. It only takes one whose patience and determination are strong enough to help it bloom."

I knew we were no longer discussing the roses. I could not meet his eyes. He would see in them the wish and longing that I could not admit. He did not wait for me to respond.

"Bella, I am a patient man, and I want nothing more than your happiness. You must decide if I am worthy of your trust. Thorns do not frighten me."

When I looked up, he was already walking through the doorway leading out of the room. My mind was spinning and I was suddenly overwhelmed with the need to sleep. I made my way back to my room and settled myself in bed. Sleep came quickly, as did the many dreams featuring vivid green eyes.

* * * A H R * * *

When morning dawned, I rose from the bed and made preparations for the day. Opening the door to make my way to the kitchen, on the floor at my feet lay a single white rose with a folded slip of paper. Inside, I found a simple note.

_My Bella,_

_ Please enjoy your day and know that I am looking forward to this evening._

_ Your patient Edward._

I folded the square of paper and tucked it into my sleeve, and placed the rose on the small table in my room. I had thought that the meeting in the conservatory might be one of the many dreams from last night. Realizing that it was indeed real, I found myself nervous for this evening's conversation. Steeling myself for the day ahead, I made my way to the dining room where Tyler was waiting beside my seat. As I sat, he uncovered a very large portion of food. Looking down, he smiled and shrugged one shoulder.

I shook my head and laughed. Edward must have had something to do with this.

"He is worried that you are not eating enough. Please enjoy your breakfast and if you desire an outing today, I would be happy to have the carriage at the ready."

I simply nodded in response. I quickly ate and then bundled a healthy amount to take to my father. There was still more food on the plate than I could have eaten when I was fully hungry and I could not help but think that it was a ridiculous amount to begin with. Running back up to my room, I gathered my shawl and basket. Placing the bundle inside, along with some sewing supplies, I headed back down the stairs and out the door. I was careful to check around corners, not wanting to be spotted by Tyler. I was sure I could return today before Edward even knew I had been gone.

The air was cold and damp as I walked to the cottage. It would not be long now until the first snow. I wondered how I would manage this walk in that cold. In the last few years, when the winter snows had come, Pastor Webber would allow me to ride with him into town each week to sell the eggs. He would often arrange a ride home for me if he could find someone traveling in the right direction. I could not even remember the last time my father had been in town. The trip to Justice Clearwater's home was the first time he had left the cottage in more than two years.

Arriving at the cottage, I noticed immediately that there was no smoke coming from the chimney. Suspecting that the fire had dwindled, I gathered some kindling, placing it into my basket before entering the cottage. Once inside, I quickly worked the fire into a blaze in an effort to warm the rooms as well as to start water to boil for cleaning and laundry.

I assumed my father was taking a morning walk. It was something he had done for years. I could remember going with him on occasion as a child. He loved the outdoors and especially enjoyed early morning walks in the brisk winter air. I set out the meal I had brought with me and was pulling the kettle full of water for tea off of the fire when the cottage door opened.

"Isabella! How was your rest, dear girl?"

"Fine, Papa. Have you an appetite this morning? I have bread with jam, hard boiled eggs and even some bacon to enjoy."

He smiled and kissed my cheek before seating himself at the table. I poured tea for us both and sat with him while he ate.

"Will you not eat?"

"I have enjoyed my breakfast already, Papa."

"Then what are your plans today, Isabella?"

"I have a great many things to accomplish today. But none that I wish to bore you with. Will you excuse me while I set about my tasks."

He simply smiled and waved me off as he bit into another slice of bread. I picked up my basket and went to the barn to gather the eggs and feed the chickens. While in the barn, I gathered some potatoes, carrots and onions from the root cellar and placed them in my basket to carry into the house.

Once inside the house, I used the vegetables to prepare a soup that I hoped would last a few days and set about making dough for bread that could rise while I cleaned the cottage. The items that I had purchased in the market on that fateful day had been delivered and needed to be put away as well. By early afternoon, I had finished most everything I had set about to accomplish today and sat down to mend one of my father's shirts. He had dozed off in front of the fire and was snoring softly. In that moment, I felt a comfort I had not felt in days. It was the simple relief of not having to worry whether I was disrupting someone else's life.

Once finished with the mending, I folded the shirt and placed it back in my father's room. Knowing it was getting late, I went to the kitchen and ladled soup into a bowl. Setting it on the table, I also sliced some freshly baked bread and set it on the table as well. Glancing one last time in my father's direction, I determined I would gather the linens that were drying on the line before waking him for an early dinner. Stepping outside, I gathered them quickly as it was getting cold and opened the back door to enter the cottage. It was only then I could hear Papa's voice, clearly addressing someone inside the cabin with him.

EPOV

"Mr. Banner, I presume?" I asked the older man standing behind the counter. He was the only other person in the store and it was clear he was either Banner or one of his employees.

Reaching out to shake my hand, he nodded vigorously. "I am the same. I do not believe I have had the pleasure, Mr. – "

"Cullen, Edward Cullen. Pleased to make your acquaintance, sir."

"Cullen, you say? Are you a relative of the late Mr. Cullen of Collingsworth Hall?"

"Yes, sir. He was my uncle. The estate has fallen to my hands, and I must admit, I find the area and the inhabitants charming."

"Welcome, then, to our small community, Mr. Cullen. So, how can I be of service to you today?"

This would be difficult if he was unwilling to answer my questions. I must be careful to gain his trust. "Sir, I have some questions as how best to win the heart of a young lady."

"Ah, you require a gift, then. Perhaps I know the young lady and could offer suggestions?"

I did not believe him to be a busybody. He seemed to ask out of a genuine offer of help. Taking a deep breath, I spoke the words that would bring the answers I needed or perhaps cause great suspicion. "Sir, I am enamored of one Isabella Swan. I would give her as many gifts as she will allow. Have you any knowledge of her preferences?"

He stared at me for a long time before looking down and away. He gestured that I should follow him toward the back of the store. Making my way behind him, I noticed a few other people in the store being assisted by an older woman I assumed was his wife.

Reaching the storage area, he turned and finally spoke. "Mr. Cullen, I am sure you are aware by now that the Swan family used to inhabit Collingsworth, yes?" I nodded in affirmation and he continued. "Isabella is a dear girl and has taken on more than she should have ever had to bear. She has done so without complaint and at the burden of being shunned by those she had called friends. I cannot help but be concerned regarding your intentions toward her."

I tried my best to put his mind at ease. I spoke the truth, but in a way that would certainly protect her reputation. "Mr. Banner, I fully intend to spend the rest of my life with her as my wife. Please, if you have any information that will assist me, I would be in your debt."

His eyes studied me for a moment before beginning to glisten. Nearing tears, he shook his head and smiled. "She is almost a daughter to me. I can offer you more than information, sir. I can offer you the very items that will guarantee her heart in exchange. Please, follow me."

I followed him into the storage room where he closed the door behind us. Opening a crate in the back of the room, he waved me over. "She began bringing in these items a few months after being evicted from the estate. I purchased anything she brought, in the hopes that I could hold it and return it to her one day. They became increasingly valuable, not always in the sense of currency, but in value to her. The latest she brought yesterday. It broke my heart for her to offer it, but she was determined. It was her mother's." He handed me a box and stepped back as though something would leap out when I removed the lid. I held it in one hand and opened it with the other. What lay inside was stunning. I could not take my eyes from it as I began to ask my question in a whisper.

"She brought this only yesterday?"

"Yes. She usually exchanges for store credit to supply the needs of the household. This she exchanged for currency. I could only assume she had some unexpected expense."

I lifted the delicate pendant from the box and turned it over in my fingers. It was beautiful and I knew it must have pained her to let it go. I knew then where she had gotten the currency to pay for her purchases yesterday. I had caused this. I had caused her to sell it by not seeing to her needs, yet asking her to live at the standard she was no longer able. She had sold items that had not meant as much to her to simply survive and yet she sold this for my request of a new gown. I had caused it, but I could also make it right.

"I will purchase this at any price you choose. You have other items that she sold as well?"

He proceeded to draw several items out of the box. A few leather bound books, a small silver cup set, a set of onyx cufflinks and a jeweled hair comb. I purchased every item and had him wrap and place them back in the crate. I had one last request of him.

"Mr. Banner, I would also like to present her father with a gift. Do you have a suggestion?"

He thought for a moment before walking over to a shelf containing several books. Choosing one, he turned and offered it to me. "Mr. Swan is an avid reader. He used to purchase a few books each week. It has obviously been several years since he has done so. He would enjoy this one."

Purchasing the book as well, I had my driver load the crate into the carriage and instructed him to head toward the estate and stop at the cottage. He looked a little skeptical and I could hardly blame him considering what happened that last time we were there. Climbing into the carriage, I settled in and tapped my hand against the side to let him know I was ready. Once the carriage began to move forward, I relaxed back against the seat. I had no idea how to give her the necklace or the other items, but she would have them. And I would make certain she was never forced to sell another possession to keep from starving.

Pulling up in front of the cottage, I realized how cold it had become. I hoped Bella had taken a carriage today, but I knew the probability was low. Picking up the book, I exited the carriage and knocked on the door. After a few moments, the door swung open to reveal a groggy Mr. Swan.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Swan. Are you well today?"

"I suppose I am. How can I help you, son?" He stepped aside as he spoke to allow me to enter the cottage.

Holding out the book, I looked around as I spoke. "Well, sir, I have come bearing a gift for you and to bring my wife home for supper."

"Your wife?"

"Yes sir, is Isabella still here, or has she gone already?" As I was speaking, the back door opened and she walked in from the cold. Looking up and meeting my eyes, her mouth dropped open and her wide eyes snapped to her father, then back to me.

"Edward?"

Hearing her speak my name barely above a whisper, her father turned and leveled a furious glare at her. He shouted, causing her to flinch back. "You have wed? What have you done, Isabella?"


	11. Discovery and Want

**Still don't own it. Still wish I did.**

**Sorry I have been so horrible at responding to reviews these last few chapters. Christmas activities with the kids has been sucking up all my spare time. Promise I will be better! Anyway, thanks for reading!**

**Okay, so, anyone interested in this little confrontation?**

EPOV

"Papa, please…"

She had dropped a pile of linens on the floor at her feet and stood with her hands up in front of her, palms up. She took a step forward and reached out to him, only to quickly pull her hand back when he turned to fully face her across the table.

"Is there truth to it? You have wed this man?"

After a moment's hesitation, she dropped her eyes to the floor and whispered so low it could barely be heard.

"Yes, Papa, he is my husband."

The words made my heart soar. I could not pretend to be indifferent when she referred to me as her husband, and looked forward to the day that she was happy with the title as well.

Her father, however, was in a rage. His face was a glowing shade of red and he began to sputter and spew vile words at her.

"You selfish girl! You have been given the best of everything and you offer this in return? Is it a hasty marriage to cover a ruined reputation? I must carry this shame? You have dishonored and disgrace our good name!"

At those words, he flung the book in his hand toward the table, hitting a bowl. The contents, apparently some sort of soup or stew, splattered, covering the front of Bella's dress and body. Her face turned away quickly to keep from being covered in the hot liquid. All the while, Mr. Swan was still shouting at her from across the room.

Knowing this was a volatile situation, I reached across and took hold of her arm, pulling her toward me, whispering my instruction. "Come, we must leave, Isabella."

"Please, Edward, I cannot leave this way."

"He is angry and will not hear you. I will not have you hurt." I pulled her with me out of the cottage and pushed her up into the carriage, climbing in behind her. Her father was still shouting something about no dowry or income being granted. I was not certain and at that moment, I did not care. My only concern was getting her safely away. Tapping my hand on the roof before we were both fully seated, the carriage pulled forward and turned toward the road to the manor.

Bella sat with her eyes fixed on the floor of the carriage. I would have given anything to know what she was thinking. Every few moments, I would see her chin quiver and expected tears. They never came.

I could not understand what had just occurred. He knew of our marriage. He was the catalyst that began this whole mess. How is it that he responded to my request for my wife as though she had committed some crime? Seeking answers, I reached out to take her hand. She immediately pulled away and wrapping her arms around herself, she turned to gaze out at the passing fields. She did not answer when I called her name and I let her be until we reached the manor.

Once the carriage came to a stop, I opened the door and stretched my hand out toward her. She climbed down quickly, unassisted and walked briskly toward the house.

"Bella?" She kept walking. As she entered through the door that Tyler held for her I called out again.

"Isabella, stop!" She stopped, but kept her eyes on the floor as I approached. Reaching for her hand, I lifted it up to inspect her wrist and forearm. There were only slight red marks from the heat of the soup. I placed my fingers under her chin and lifter her face upward and to the right so I could inspect her neck and and collar as well. There were splotches of red, but no blistering. Turning to Tyler, I called out instructions.

"Tyler, please ask Mrs. Cope to come see to Mrs. Cullen's injuries. I would like her to have some assistance in cleaning up and redressing."

He nodded and quickly turned to find Mrs. Cope. Looking back at Bella, I kept hold of her hand as we waited. The doors opened from the dining room and Mrs. Cope all but ran across the floor toward Bella. Knowing that she was in no shape to explain anything, I gave Mrs. Cope just enough information to keep her from asking.

"Mrs. Cope, she has had a mishap at her father's cottage. I am worried that she may have some slight burns. Would you be so kind as to see to her injured skin and help her redress? I would still like to have our supper in the sitting room a bit later if you can still manage it."

"Of course, sir. Mr. Tyler has just today hired some help for the household in preparation of the Season and your family's arrival. She can have your meal set up to your liking. I will take care of this one and deliver her sparkling in a little while."

She took Bella's hand in hers and started to turn her to head upstairs. I tugged gently on Bella's hand to get her attention. "Isabella, I will be waiting for you in the sitting room when you are finished. There are certainly issues that we need to discuss."

I wanted her to be reassured that I was going nowhere, but also that I would not tolerate waiting for an explanation regarding her father's actions. Walking toward the sitting room, I tried to puzzle out what I knew. Mr. Swan had lost the estate due to neglect of payment for outstanding accounts. The estate was extremely profitable and therefore should not have been in debt. He had allowed Isabella to labor tirelessly in the cottage to care for him as he was accustomed. He had forced the marriage of his only daughter to a gentleman giving no thought to the fact that he had no grounds to do so based on his position in society. Now, he claimed his daughter had married against his wishes and blamed her for the disgrace of her family name. Clearly he was not quite right of mind. I needed answers and I could only hope that Bella could recover enough to give them to me this evening.

Bella. I struggled to comprehend what she must be feeling. She was innocent, but had horrible accusations hurled at her by her own father. It must have caused her such grief and sorrow to hear him say it. Why had she not told me? Truthfully, I knew why. She had not yet come to trust me.

As I was trying to work out how to gain her trust, the door opened and Mrs. Cope entered the room.

"She is worried that you are angry with her. If you will not mind my saying so, that girl is the strongest woman I have ever met. She is trying to work out how to help you deal with this situation, how to care for her father, and she has shed not one tear. Though, if you ask me, a good cry in the company of someone to offer comfort would do her a world of good. I know you must have a word with her, but I ask that you speak gently, please."

"I have no intention of hurting her, Mrs. Cope. Her happiness is most important to me. Thank you for caring for her needs this evening. I am grateful to have you here in the absence of my mother and sister."

She only smiled and nodded before turning to leave the room. She had been with my family since I was a young boy. I considered it a great favor that she agreed to move to Collingsworth with me. I was also thankful for her being here this day to see to Bella. It would have been very awkward to have helped her myself, even if I were her husband.

It was only moments after the door closed behind Mrs. Cope that it opened again. I was facing the fire and did not hear anyone address me. Knowing then it was Bella, I turned and took in her appearance. Her plain brown dress was worn and badly needed replacing. Her hair was still damp and fell in a long braid down her back. She stood twisting her hands together, a sure sign of her nervousness. I took a deep breath and stated the obvious.

BPOV

"He has no memory of our marriage."

I could not look at him as I answered. "No, he does not. He has no memory of most anything at all."

"Explain, please."

Walking over to look out the window, I took a moment to gather my thoughts. He stood by the fire, facing toward me. I could feel the weight of his gaze on me but did not dare glance in his direction. I would need to keep my wits about me to tell him this story and I was certain that if I met his eyes, I would lose any hope I had of keeping tears at bay. Finally, taking a deep breath, I began my explanation.

"It began several years ago. He would forget small things. A family gathering, a birthday, that sort of thing. After a while, he would forget names and sometimes he would forget where he was going. That was not so difficult as there was always a driver with him. At some point, he asked Mr. Smith, our overseer, to handle most of the estate's accounts because he could not remember to pay them. He would sign the deposits and place them with Mr. Smith, but there came a time when there never seemed to be enough. Mr. Smith left our employ and we were left to inform the remaining staff that there was no more income to be had. I spent weeks finding placements for them with other households. I would have done so for myself, but there would be no one to care for Papa. The doctor saw him and reported that eventually he would simply cease to remember me as well. He would forget even his everyday necessities and his life would dwindle down to end."

I stepped away from the window and turned toward the hearth where he was still standing. I wanted him to understand clearly my next words. "You must know, that I would not change anything that has happened since we were expelled from the estate. We surely would have starved that first winter had it not been for Mrs. Webber. She taught me to grow vegetables, and put them up for winter, to sew, to raise chicks, and every other conceivable need we might have. Our cottage is small, but it is clean and well kept. And I have cared for my father in the best way I could given his…. Issues. I am proud to have helped him keep at least his dignity. He must be devastated at the manner in which I left this evening."

"Isabella, he was angry and would not hear your explanation. In truth there was none to give. You are in fact married, whether he has memory of it or not. I would not leave you there to the risk of violence at his hand."

"He is not violent, Edward. He would not hurt me."

He reached up and traced his fingers over my lower jaw and down my neck along the line where the hot soup had left a now fading red mark. "He may not have harmed you intentionally, but in his rage, I could not trust his actions. I would not see you at his anger's mercy."

He turned abruptly and walked a few steps away, rubbing his hands roughly over his face before turning to look directly into my eyes. His words began quiet and low, but as he spoke, they grew in intensity. "Since the moment I laid eyes on you, I have had no moment's peace. It is the desire of my very soul to guard and protect you. I cannot fathom you having to work yourself into exhaustion as you have today. I want to give you gifts and provide you with anything your heart desires. Yet, even this day, I cannot even persuade you to take a carriage from my stable. I pay the drivers for their services. I would very much like for them to earn their income. I want more for you in this life. You do not make it easy, My Bella."

"Edward…" He spoke again before I could voice an argument.

"You will not allow me even to feed you!" He was nearly shouting now. When I began to shake my head and opened my mouth to speak, he held up a hand to stop me and continued on. "Did you not think I could see it on the table? You have carried your meals to the cottage and presented them to your father to meet his needs. Yet you will not allow me to consider your needs, Bella."

He had been advancing toward me while speaking and I found myself now only a handful of inches from his body. I was forced to raise my head at a steep angle to look at his face. Once I did, I could not look away from the intensity of his gaze as he spoke in a whisper.

"I am so very sorry for all that you have had to endure. For the loss of your home, your father's health, your dreams. I want so much more for you, My Bella. Let me give you a future."

I fought to control my emotions as I knew what he offered. It was too much. It was hope.

"Edward, please. You cannot…. You make me want things I cannot want. Please."

He brought both hands up to caress my cheeks as he locked my gaze in his. "What is it you want, Bella? Tell me."

I could not think. I closed my eyes. He was so close and his touch was so gentle. I wanted to feel his arms around me once again. I wanted to simply hear his voice. I wanted to hope for a future with him.

He leaned in so close that his lips and breath barely tickled mine as he spoke. "Tell me what you want, Bella?"

"I…I want… sleep." Trembling, I leaned back from him gasping in a small breath. "I want sleep. Please, excuse me." I turned and fled from the room.

Sleep was not what I wanted at that moment. I wanted his kiss. I wanted his arms. It could not happen. I would lose myself entirely. I knew beyond any doubt now that he could destroy me. Hope was not the only thing he held over me. This was something new and as much as I wanted it, I could not risk allowing it to continue. He knew the truth now, and I feared that once he had the chance to consider all of the information, he would no longer choose to offer hope. I had no choice but to guard my heart, for I knew if I did not, it would end up broken.

EPOV

She ran. I suppose that was to be expected. I could not help my advance on her. She was strong and beautiful and giving and I could hear the passion in her voice as she spoke of her concern for her father as well as what she had accomplished to help them survive. It took every ounce of strength I could find to keep myself in control with her.

I loved her.

It was more clear to me with each passing second. I would give her the world and offer her the universe if I were able.

Knowing what I now knew regarding her father, I would need help to move her forward and help her achieve her dreams.

Calling for Tyler, I began to formulate a plan. Once he arrived, I asked him to also bring Mrs. Cope. Giddy with anticipation, I laid out a plan of action for each of them.

"Tyler, I will need you to oversee the preparations for the arrival of my family. I will be rather occupied over the next few days and would like to hand those duties to you. I will also need you to locate roses in every shade and variety. I would like them placed in the conservatory for Mrs. Cullen."

Turning to Mrs. Cope, I had a list of instruction for her as well. "Mrs. Cope, there is a great need for clothing and other … essential items. I want her to have the finest gowns and slippers available. She has just purchased a gown for the ball and I am certain that the dressmaker has all her measurements. I want her to have the best of everything. And she will need at least one dress that will be fit to display a jeweled pendant."

She smiled widely at me and said she would be thrilled to accommodate my request, before turning to go. Tyler followed her out.

I needed to speak to Jasper about finding someone to care for Mr. Swan. I had no qualms with Bella spending time with her father, I just did not want her to have to work the entire time she was with him. I would also need his assistance in gathering information on the whereabouts of Mr. Smith. It seemed he might be the key to finding out exactly what happened that removed the Swan family from Collingsworth.


	12. Tea and Touch

**Don't own it. Wish I did.**

**I am excited about this chapter, too! Hope you like it. Let me know, please.**

BPOV

I had spent half the night tossing from side to side in the bed and the other half pacing the floor. I was worried about Papa, worried about Edward, worried about his family coming in a few days, and most unnerving, I was worried that this could end at any time.

Well, worried was not the right word. Terrified. I was terrified that at any moment Justice Clearwater would arrive, annulment in hand, and inform us that the marriage had been dissolved. It was what was best for Edward and Papa, but his words kept repeating in my head.

"_What is it you want, Bella?" _I knew what my heart wanted, but it was wrong. It would be wrong to ask so much of him. I wanted to be married to him. I wanted to be his wife and spend my life with him. The thought was frightening and wonderful at the same time. I could not tell him while he still had an option. If the annulment was granted, it would be his choice. If not, I could tell him what I wanted.

In the early morning hours, I finally gave up any hope of sleep. Dressing for the day, I pinned my hair up and pulled on my shoes. Making my way downstairs, I listened for voices, but heard none. I realized I had no idea if Edward was an early riser, or if he preferred late nights. There were a great many things I had yet to learn about him. How did he like his tea? Did he prefer the outdoors in the spring and summer? Did he hunt? Or ride for pleasure?

As I walked past the study, I heard muffled voices from inside. The door was barely open and I could see Edward and Jasper inside, both studying some paperwork on the desk. I moved swiftly on past toward the kitchen so as not to disturb their work.

Once I reached the kitchen, I put on water for tea and reached for a cup and saucer. I had not realized until that moment that everything we had left behind was still in the house. I assumed that once it had been sold the new owner would fill it with his own belongings. I suppose Mr. Robert Cullen had not occupied the estate long enough to have our things replaced with his own. I was now holding my mother's favorite china teacup. It was her own mother's cup and she always used it for her morning tea. I held the cup against my chest and closed my eyes.

She always smelled of lavender and roses and she would read each morning while sipping tea. Once finished, she would go out to her rose garden and walk among her prized flowers. On cold or rainy days, she would stand above the garden in the conservatory, much as I had done just a couple of days ago. I would accompany her most days as she would tell me how to care for the blooms and allow me to hold the basket as she cut fresh flowers for arrangements. Once I was old enough, she would follow along with me as I made the cuttings.

I startled as I felt warmth on my cheek. Opening my eyes, I looked directly into intense green gazing back at me. Edward's gentle fingers were wiping away the tears I hadn't realized were falling. I quickly swiped my own fingers across my cheeks to rid myself of the offending wetness and turned to move away. He caught my shoulders and turned me back to face him.

"Bella? Will you tell me? What has saddened you?"

"I was just thinking about my mother. Some days I miss her more than others."

"This belonged to her?" He indicated her cup and I nodded in affirmation. "Would you like some tea?" Again I nodded.

He silently set about preparing tea for the both of us. I watched him for a moment before looking around the kitchen. Realizing the hour, it was odd that we were alone in this room.

"Edward, where is Mrs. Cope?"

"She has agreed to handle some errands for me in town. She will take care of the shopping as well. We are on our own for breakfast." He finished his preparations as he spoke. When he looked up, he offered me the cup and saucer. "I think your mother would be proud to see you as mistress of this estate, Bella. And I think that she would be honored that you now enjoy your morning tea from her favorite cup."

Swallowing the lump that had formed in my throat, I changed the subject by asking him a question. "How do you take your tea?"

He looked a bit startled. Then a boyish grin spread across his face as he spoke. "Well, I have a bit of a sweet tooth, so I prefer sugar."

I smiled back at him. "And do you prefer toast or cake with it?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "Sweet tooth."

"Ah, cake it is, then."

It was quiet for a moment before he reached over and took the tea from my hands and began walking out of the room carrying both of our cups. I could only assume he wished me to follow. We entered the conservatory where he sat our cups on the table near the window overlooking the sadly neglected rose garden. Indicating I should sit, he turned and exited the room. I sat, unsure of what would happen, but knowing he would return. A moment later, he did return with a covered tray in hand.

Once seated, he uncovered the tray and offered its contents. Fruit, eggs, ham, toast and milk. I had not realized I was hungry until that moment. My stomach grumbled loudly which made Edward laugh once again.

"I knew you must be famished, having not eaten since early yesterday. I have sent one of the staff to the cottage with meals prepared for your father today. She will take care of meeting his needs today, Bella. If you wish to visit him, I will accompany you, though I must say, I would like you to consider waiting until tomorrow."

"Why?"

"Mostly to be certain that his anger has subsided." He turned to fully face me as he continued. "I also hoped that you would agree to spend the day with me. The weather seems a little more agreeable this morning and we will not have many more days like this before the snows start. I thought we might go for a ride and you could show me the more interesting sights of the estate."

"Thank you. I would like that very much."

The thought of spending the day with him in such a relaxing pursuit was thrilling to me. We finished our breakfast with little more conversation and he called for Tyler to have the horsed readied. Once we were done, I gathered my shawl while he placed a snack of fruit, cheese, and bread into the saddle bags. Then, after lifting me onto the mare I was given to ride, he mounted his horse and we were off.

The day was lovely and seemed to pass all too quickly. We rode until early afternoon and stopped for a picnic. We walked along for a while, simply carrying the horses reigns, talking about books, music, personal preferences, and anything else that crossed our minds. As it grew late in the day, we headed back to the manor.

Jasper was waiting at the bottom of the grand staircase as we came into the house. He leaned against the banister, grinning at us. "Well, it certainly looks as though you have had a pleasant day."

I felt the blush cover my cheeks as I avoided his penetrating eyes. Beside me, I heard Edward laugh.

"Stop embarrassing my wife, Jasper."

At his words, I felt my skin grow even more warm, causing him to laugh harder. The sound was glorious. Shaking my head, I turned to Jasper. "I have had a most pleasant day, sir. I hope you have as well."

"That I have, Isabella. Would you mind terribly if I borrowed your husband for a moment before supper?"

"Not at all. I would prefer to freshen up before supper, so I will leave you to it."

Turning to go up the stairs, I stopped when I heard Edward calling out to me.

"Bella, thank you for a truly enjoyable day. I look forward to many more like it."

His words were brief, but the look of sincerity in his eyes was dear to me. In that moment, I could feel myself coming undone. I turned quickly and all but ran up the stairs, leaving the men to chuckle behind me.

* * * A H R * * *

The next couple of days were much the same. We would spend a large portion of the day together, taking walks, sharing meals, reading passages from our favorite books aloud and discussing them, and learning more about one another. One rainy afternoon we spent by the fire in the library, playing chess and cards and laughing at silly jokes. We had been to see my father twice. Both times, Edward waited in the carriage while I made short visits. He thought it might upset Papa if he came into the cottage. It would simply be a repeat of what had happened before and it was best that he not be overwrought again. We had pleasant visits, but he seemed a bit distant and I wondered if he were once again losing some ground in his battle to not lose himself entirely.

Things had certainly changed between us. Edward had always been attentive, but now he was affectionate as well. He would take my hand as we exited the carriage, and continue to hold it as we walked away. He would touch my hand, arm, face, or whatever was within reach and propriety as we talked. He often would twist my hair around his fingers as he listened to me speak, only to tuck it back behind my ear, drawing his fingertips along my jaw after doing so. If I were honest, every touch set me aflame. I began to crave his touch, his caress. I had never experienced the touch or kiss of a man and was finding the longing for it overwhelming where Edward was concerned.

Tomorrow, Edward's family would arrive. I was nervous about meeting them. Edward had said they knew nothing about me and our marriage would be a surprise. Only time would tell whether they would accept our situation or if they would be enraged because I had forced him into an unexpected marriage. I found myself fearful that their response to me could destroy the joy I felt with Edward. On the selfish side, I worried that his gentle touches would stop once the house was filled with people.

Standing at the windows of the conservatory, I heard him approach and I looked up to catch his reflection in the glass. It was late evening and the rain had finally ended. I had been watching as the stars began peeking out from behind the disappearing clouds. His reflection looked angelic surrounded by the starlight.

"What has you so contemplative this evening, Bella?"

"Nothing."

He placed his fingers under my chin, turning my face toward him. He stared at me intently for a moment.

"You lie. What is it?"

"Must you always call me out?"

"Must you always be so stubborn?" He was smirking at me, but his eyes were full of concern. "Tell me. Please."

Sighing, I turned back to the window. "What time will your family arrive tomorrow?"

"Ah, I thought that might be the trouble. They will arrive in the afternoon, and they will love you, Bella. They want only my happiness and I am truly happy right now. Please do not fret about this."

"I cannot seem to help it." It was true. No matter how I tried, I could not stop thinking about their impending arrival.

"Perhaps I can distract you." He reached across my body to pull at my shoulder, turning me to face him as he stepped closer. He was so close, I placed my hands on his chest to balance myself. I was startled at my boldness and started to pull my hands away. He quickly moved his hand to cover both of mine, and stared intently into my eyes. I began to tremble at having him so near, holding me closer than he ever had before this moment.

I closed my eyes and took a steadying breath. Feeling fluttering, light pressure against my eyelids, I realized it was his lips. Placing feather light kisses across to my temple and down to my ear he whispered, "Relax, Bella. Trust me."

He placed one hand on my lower back, pulling me in tighter against his body, while his other hand came up to cup the back of my neck. I opened my eyes to find his focused on my lips as he continued to caress my neck. He glanced back up at my eyes, sliding his hand up into my hair and pulling me toward him. My eyes closed again as I felt the slightest of pressure against the corner of my mouth. Then a soft, slow brush of his lips against mine.

I could not help the whimper that escaped my throat as my fingers grasped his shirt, holding him close. His mouth met mine again, moving with a gentle firmness. It was exquisite. I had never been this close to another person, yet felt I could not get close enough. I felt warmth spread over me as I began to move my lips against his. He let out a quiet moan and broke the kiss, leaning his forehead against mine.

"I fear I will never get enough of you, My Bella."

He was still holding me close and I was sure he could feel my heart pounding. I opened my mouth to respond, but could not seem to find my voice. He reached up and placed his palm against my cheek, rubbing his thumb across my lower lip. "You are precious to me Bella. It matters not what anyone else thinks."

He pulled my cheek against his chest and rested his chin on the top of my head. We stood like that for a long time, just soaking in the warmth and comfort the other provided. His family was arriving tomorrow, but tonight I did not care. I could not bring myself to worry about anything save one thing. My heart no longer belonged to me. Edward had sole possession of it and I was terrified. There was no chance I might come out of this without being hurt, but in this moment it did not matter. I had everything I wanted tonight.


	13. Frocks and Family

**Still don't own it. Sad about that.**

**So, I am still having a hard time staying up with the reviews. Preparing middle school students for a Christmas concert and getting grades logged has sucked up my time. But I still get so excited every time I see a review and get to hear what you think! Thank you so much for reviewing and for recommending this story to others!**

**So…the family is arriving….**

BPOV

I raised my arms above my head and stretched, arching my back off of the bed, before rolling to my side and opening my eyes to the bit of light that was streaming in the window. It was overcast and I knew it would rain today. I suppose it was to be expected this time of the year.

My mind drifted to the cloudy evening of yesterday. To the clearing of the clouds and watching the stars come out last night. Reaching up, I pressed my fingers to my lips. I could almost still feel the tingle that the press of his lips on mine left behind. It was more than I ever dreamed, and I found myself wishing that we were still standing in an embrace at the window so that I could experience that kiss once again.

A noise on the far side of the room startled me. Turning, I saw the door open slightly and heard Mrs. Cope speaking before I saw her.

"Mrs. Cullen, are you proper, ma'am? There is a certain gentleman who would very much like to enter your room and would like to know if you are properly attired."

"Please allow him entrance, Mrs. Cope. I am decent." I pulled the blanket up and secured it under my arms to cover myself better at the same moment that the door swung wide and Edward stepped inside, carrying a tray. Walking over to the window, he sat the tray down on the table and pulled off the cover.

"Would you prefer your breakfast here or in bed? I am happy to accommodate you either way." He was holding the tray cover, smiling and waiting for my response. It felt odd, knowing that I was only covered by a thin nightgown and blanket, and yet I was not embarrassed or uncomfortable with him in the room.

I answered his question by scooting to one side of the bed and patting the space next to me. He grinned widely and picked up the tray. Carrying it over, he sat down on the side of the bed, facing me, and opened it once again. He began preparing my breakfast as I looked down at the offering before me. I gasped aloud and snapped my eyes back to his when I saw the occupants of the tray.

Lifting one of the silver cups containing milk, I held it up for his inspection. Smiling, he nodded in acknowledgement. "I purchased those just this week at the market. They were too lovely to pass up and I thought you might enjoy them as well."

They were a set of silver cups that had been my favorite as a child. I always wanted to enjoy sips from those cups and my father always obliged. I had no idea where they came from, but because I had loved them so, they left the estate with me. I had sold them to Mr. Banner last year to purchase staples to feed us through the winter. I was sure that there was no possibility that Edward knew these had belonged to me. Finding my voice, I let him know how much I loved them.

"They are beautiful, Edward. Thank you for presenting me with something so precious. I will enjoy having them more than you could know." I stopped speaking for the lump in my throat. I feared I would fall to tears and needed to change the subject. "Have all the preparations been made for your family?"

"They have, all but one. You, my dear, are my final preparation. I admit that the meal offered in bed was just an excuse to have you to myself for a moment, but there are several things that will need your attention this morning."

"Whatever do you mean?" I could not fathom what it was that needed to be attended to by me of all people. He did not make me wait long. He was fidgeting with the edge of the blanket and looking at the floor beside him. It was obvious he was nervous about something.

"Bella, I do not want to offend you and I am having difficulty in deciding how to present you with a gift. Please understand that I have no issue with your appearance or grooming, whatsoever. I just thought perhaps you would like to have some new things, so I sent Mrs. Cope to make some purchases on your behalf. There have been several packages delivered and – "

"You bought me clothing?"

"I did not make the purchases. I simply asked another woman to make the selections as a gift to my bride. Please do not be stubborn in this. I would have you comfortable and happy in dresses and finery that were suited to your beauty and your position as my wife."

"Edward, it is too much. I cannot hope to repay you for – "

"I believe you hold a misconception regarding gifts. A gift is something commonly given with nothing expected in return. If I expect anything, it will be your happy countenance and nothing more."

He held such boyish excitement and expectation as he waited for my response, I could not help but smile and shake my head at him. "Very well, Edward, if it makes you happy."

"Exceedingly so. Thank you for being so gracious. I will have Mrs. Cope assist you." He reached for my hand and gave it a slight squeeze, still holding it as he stood.

Grasping his hand with my own, I looked up at him, knowing I needed to address what was happening between us.

"Edward, I…I…"

Sitting down once again, he frowned and took my hand firmly in his while brushing my wayward curls from my face. "What is troubling you?"

"I feel… you….I…" closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I spoke barely above a whisper once I had gathered my thoughts. "I have never experienced anything like last night."

"You had never been kissed." It was a statement. He knew the truth of it, there was no need to question.

"No."

"And did you enjoy it?" His voice was low and rough. I glanced up to find his eyes carefully watching my face.

"I did. Very much." I whispered, unnerved to admit it aloud.

"And is it something you would like to experience again?" His eyes never left mine as he waited for my response. His gaze was so intense, I could not look away.

"I would, yes. But if you feel that you ca – "

"Bella, you must stop talking if you wish to be kissed." I had only enough time to suck in a stunned breath before his mouth was on mine. It began as soft and gentle as the kiss last night. His hands released mine and came up to hold my face between his palms. Turning my head slightly to the side, he angled his lips across mine as I felt his tongue glide across my lower lip and make it's way into my mouth. The feeling was incredible as his mouth seemed to fit mine perfectly and his tongue was gently caressing my own.

My hands, resting on his chest, slid up and around his neck, pulling him closer, while one of his caressed its way down my neck to rest on my collarbone, his fingertips just under the edge of my nightgown's neckline. Abruptly, he pulled back, breaking the kiss. His breathing was ragged as he scrubbed his hands over his face and stood quickly, turning his back to me.

"I am sorry, Edward. I should not have asked – "

"Do not apologize, Bella. It is my fault. It is difficult for me to control myself with you. Being this close to you while you are all but undressed and vulnerable, I…"

His words drifted off as he looked out the window toward the forest behind the manor. Finally, he turned and smiled at me. "I will not deny that I have a great desire for you. You tempt me almost beyond reason, but I want more for you. I will wait until you want more as well."

More? What more could I want? It seemed anything I wanted he would provide for me. He was attentive and caring and would wait for what I wanted. What did I want? I was lost in my musings, trying to discern his meaning when he spoke again.

"I will call for Mrs. Cope to come assist you, as well as have a bath drawn. We have a couple of hours yet before they arrive and I must meet with Jasper concerning some business. I am looking forward to presenting you to my family, Bella. Please relax and enjoy the rest of your morning."

With that he stepped out the door and was gone. Moments later, Mrs. Cope entered the room, grinning and giggling at me. "I have lovely dresses from Mrs. Crowley. She sent some ribbon and pins for your hair as well." She went on for a few minutes detailing all that she had purchased for me and in what colors. My mind was lost to it, as I could think of nothing save that kiss.

"Mrs. Cullen? Ma'am?"

Snapping my eyes up to hers, Mrs. Cope gave me an amused shake of her head as she gestured toward the bath.

Two hours later, I had been washed, dressed, perfumed, curled, and pinned. I stood before the mirror, amazed at what was reflected there. I wore a cream colored dress with scarlet embroidery and ribbons, my hair curled and pinned up and satin slippers. I bore no resemblance to the woman who had arrived at the estate more than a week ago. In truth, I was not sure which of those two women I truly was. The stubborn survivor, or the lady of the manor?

Descending the stairs, I worried that Edward would not be satisfied with what he saw when I found him. Would he expect more? I found myself worrying about these things that usually would not have received a second thought. Today, however, I knew things had changed and I wanted, no, needed Edward to be pleased. I did not have to wait long. He was exiting the study when I reached the bottom of the stairs.

"God in heaven, Isabella, you are stunning." He moved to stand in front of me, taking my hand in his and kissing it gently. "You truly are My Beauty."

I felt the flaming heat as the blush crept over my skin. He placed my hand in the crook of his arm and held it there as he turned us to walk toward the grand staircase in the foyer.

"You have impeccable timing. They will arrive at any moment and I am glad to have you on my arm to greet them."

As he finished speaking, the door flew open and a tiny woman with dark hair came rushing into the room. She dropped her hat and small bag on the floor and ran straight for me. Pulling me into her tight embrace, she spoke barely above an excited whisper.

"Isabella, I am so happy to make your acquaintance. Jasper has told me all about you and your unfortunate circumstance, but he also says that you are the perfect match for our Edward. We are sisters and I look forward to us being friends!"

She spoke quickly and held me tightly as she did. Once finished, she turned to Edward and jumped up, wrapping her arms around his neck as he swung her in a circle. She was laughing as he smiled and winked at me. Placing her on the floor, Edward laughed and shook his head.

"I suppose this means Jasper has taken care of the introductions as well. Have they all heard then?"

Jasper laughed aloud as he responded. "Not at all. Alice wanted to know what had been occupying your time. We were riding in the carriage by ourselves, so I filled her in. The rest are all yours."

As he finished speaking, the door opened once again and Tyler entered followed by two other men all carrying trunks and packages. Behind them were two gentlemen, two ladies and a small girl with golden curls. I could feel my heart beating hard and fast as I tried to control my breathing. This moment would determine much regarding our future and I felt the full weight of it.

Edward stepped forward toward a woman with hair and eyes matching his own. By her age, I knew she was his mother. She was very graceful and lovely. Edward embraced her as she kissed his cheek. Beside her stood a gentleman with blond hair and deep blue eyes. He was tall and held himself proudly, much like Edward. After releasing his mother, Edward greeted his father in the same manner, speaking quietly with them for a moment. He continued along the line of guests which included a rather large man with curly brown hair and eyes that seemed to dance with laughter. Finally, a woman whose beauty was unequalled stood by his side. She had golden hair that draped gracefully in a braid over her shoulder. Her eyes were a bright, vibrant blue and seemed to take in her surroundings with ease, while giving away no emotion. The child at her feet was a lovely mix of her parents with round, rosy cheeks and her mother's blue eyes.

As I watched the greeting taking place before me, I wondered if I might be able to simply slip down the nearest hallway and hide in the library. With each moment that passed, I grew more panicked, knowing the importance of this meeting, yet being unable to discern its outcome.

Edward turned then, walking over to take my hand securely in his. Pulling me close beside him, he looked back to his family and began to name them for my benefit.

"These are my parents, Carlisle and Esme Cullen, my brother, Emmett, and his wife Rosalie. And this jewel is Emma." He was smiling fondly at her. For her part, Emma was obviously excited to see her uncle as well. It was clear that she adored him.

Turning to smile at me, he squeezed my hand and looked back up at his family. "May I introduce Isabella, my wife."

Their response would have been amusing had I watched it in regard to someone else. All four sets of adult eyes snapped to me, then back to Edward as they tried to comprehend what he had said. His mother spoke first.

"Edward? Have I understood you correctly?"

"You have. Please, come to the parlor. Tea has been prepared and you can rest from your journey while I tell you all that has transpired."

Wrapping his arm around my shoulders, he placed a soft kiss to the top of my head and whispered, "Breathe, My Bella. All will be well." We led the rest of his family into the parlor where Mrs. Cope was waiting with the tea. Edward led me to the sofa and did not release my hand until I was seated. The other ladies in the room took a seat as well, while the men stood stoically beside them. Jasper stepped toward Edward and handed him a glass filled with something I was certain to find stronger than tea. After taking a sip, Edward cleared his throat and turned to face his family.

"Isabella's family carries the surname, Swan. Her father was the owner of Collingsworth Hall prior to Robert Cullen."

For the next thirty minutes, Edward explained, in detail, the events that led to our marriage as well as the possibility of annulment. During the entirety, I could not look up from my lap where my hands were fidgeting endlessly with the fabric of my dress. I felt great fear regarding their response. After a moment, when he had finished speaking, I glanced up to see Esme's tear stained face. Taking my hand in hers, she spoke quietly, but with conviction.

"You are a beautiful, brave girl. I have yet to know more than your name, but I look forward to it."

Glancing around the room, Alice wore much the same expression as Esme. Carlisle sat on the bench, smiling at me, but lost in thought. Jasper grinned widely and Emmett had a mischievous grin and was glancing between Edward and me shaking his head.

The only response that kept me on edge was Rosalie. She locked her gaze on me and her stare was decidedly cold and harsh. She seemed angry, or at the very least irritated. I was uncertain as to how to address her, so I maintained my silence and waited. After a moment, Esme pulled me into her arms before passing me to Carlisle who embraced me warmly as well.

My relief was overwhelming. His family was a loving and accepting group, except for Rosalie. Perhaps in time, I could win her trust. It was a promising start and I would be thrilled with their acceptance as it was more than I could have hoped for.


	14. Dinner and Roses

**Still don't own anything.**

**Sorry about taking longer to update. I teach music to middle schoolers and this week has been insane with preparations for a concert as well as getting grades logged before the break. I am planning to write a lot this weekend if my own kids let me have some time to do it!**

**Anyway, thank you to everyone who has been reading and reviewing this story. I can't begin to tell you how much I appreciate your kind words and encouragement. I have tried to reply to each one. If I have missed you, please know I really do love to hear from you.**

**So, how about I shut up and let Edward talk...**

EPOV

To say that I was thrilled with my family's acceptance of Bella would be a great understatement. I knew my mother would adore her and while I was uncertain regarding my father's response to her, I knew he would reserve judgment until he had the opportunity to get to know her character. My sister had been prepared by Jasper and was happy that I was happy, but I had no doubt that she would find a great friend in Bella. Emmett seemed taken with her as well, telling me he had been impressed with her strength. Rosalie was always reticent when it came to new acquaintances, but I held hope that she would come around.

Bella was nervous, that much was obvious, but my mother's open affection for her put her quickly at ease. Once the awkward moments had passed, the afternoon had been pleasant as we shared the happenings in our lives. I told them of my life at Collingsworth and they informed me of all that had occurred in my absence from Whitfield. Finally, a little more than three hours after their arrival, everyone went to their quarters to prepare for the evening meal.

Dinner with my family had always been a more formal affair. I did not mind as I knew my mother and sister enjoyed it. It would be the first time since Bella's arrival at the manor that we had entertained guests and while I was looking forward to the event, I was disappointed that she would be required to sit at the end of the table opposite me. I had grown rather fond of having her near during meals.

Conversation flowed comfortably and seamlessly during our meal and eventually the topic turned to the upcoming Ball. My mother had been making preparations from Whitfield and only needed to complete small details.

"The invitations were received weeks ago and we have had a very favorable response. I believe most of the county will be in attendance. Isabella, Mrs. Cope assures me that you have done a lovely job with the menu for the evening." My mother had directed her conversation to Bella to engage her as mistress of the house. I could not stop the grin from spreading across my face.

Looking up at me first, then to my mother at my encouraging nod, she answered "I have done my best, Mrs. Cullen. I have never had to plan for such a large event but Mrs. Cope is very knowledgeable in this area."

Rosalie spoke up for the first time. "Have you not attended the Ball here before, Isabella?"

"I was to begin my first Season and attend the Ball for the first time the same year that we left the estate." Her voice had become quiet and she turned her eyes back down toward the table. "It was not possible for me to attend, and I have certainly never had a hand in hosting any such event."

Alice was all too eager to join the conversation. "Have you chosen a gown? It must have been short notice for you."

"Yes, I have a gown. It is a lovely blue silk and I am very much looking forward to wearing it."

I will not deny that I was thrilled to learn the color of her dress. There must be an opportunity to present her with the necklace prior to the Ball. I would seek Alice's help.

Once dinner had finished, my father, Jasper, Emmett and I retired to the library to allow the ladies the time to discuss whatever it is women find interesting after meals. The questions began immediately upon my arrival in the room where the three men were already gathered. My father began the inquisition.

"Edward, are you certain this is the course you wish to pursue?"

I chuckled and shook my head as I answered. "It is not as though I had a choice in the beginning. I must admit, I was angry and even accused her of plotting. There was no truth to it, of course. I have since found her to be strong and kind and industrious. She is unbelievably selfless and I –"

"And you are obviously very much in love with her." Jasper was smirking without remorse as he confessed this to my brother and father.

"I cannot deny it. I am hopelessly in love with my wife."

Emmett spoke up then, clearly amused. "It was certainly a surprise. A marriage was the last thing we ever expected when we arrived. She is beautiful and will make a lovely addition to your household. Tell me though, does she return your affection?"

Releasing a deep sigh, I pushed my fingers through my hair and began to pace the span of floor in front of the fireplace. "I am certain she does. She has not spoken it, but she responds to me as if she loves me. She has endured so much loss, I believe she fears attaching herself to someone else she could lose. I hope to gain her trust, but for all her strength, she is still a fragile creature."

After a glass of port and a couple of hours of conversation regarding the business of the estate, it was decided that a good night's sleep was a necessity after the day of travel. My father and Emmett bid us good evening and went to their respective quarters. Jasper closed the door behind them and turned back to me.

"Edward, I have found some information that you might find interesting. The loss of funds from the estate began more than 5 years ago, which would correspond with the time that Isabella told us the difficulty started. Her father was signing over large sums to their overseer to handle household affairs. While this is a normal practice, the funds never made it into the household accounts. I have asked Tyler to gather all documentation on the estate and its income, and I will continue to look into the discrepancies."

I understood what he was saying, but wanted to be certain before any accusations were made. "Yes, please continue your research. I believe there is definitely an issue involving Mr. Smith."

After a few more minutes of discussion on the matter, Jasper could take it no longer and excused himself for the evening, having not seen his wife in more than two weeks. I was happy to allow him to go as I wished to find My Bella for a kiss goodnight. Setting off in search of her, I found her door already closed with no sound coming from within. I assumed she was already sleeping and made my way to my own room for bed. I looked forward to the day when I would be slipping into a bed warmed by Bella, to find comfort in her arms after a stressful day and to offer her the security of mine. I feared it would be some time before she could trust me enough to take that step in our relationship, but I would wait and hope. For now, my bed was what I needed, cold though it may be. I was exhausted, and I wanted to be awake early to see to preparations for yet another surprise for my wife.

* * * A H R * * *

I stood in the doorway of the morning room watching her prepare her tea. She was quiet, but did not seem as nervous as she had yesterday. I feared I would startle her, so I spoke her name softly to gain her attention. Turning, she met my eyes and smiled gently at me.

"Good morning, Edward. Did you sleep well?"

"I did, thank you. Did you enjoy your evening with the ladies?"

"Very much. Your mother is so very kind, and I adore Alice. She is much like I remember my mother. But I am afraid I have made a poor impression on Rosalie. She barely spoke and did not seem pleased with me at all. She is wonderful with Emma, and I must admit, I envy that relationship."

This was interesting information. Was she envious of Emma due to the attentions of her mother, or Rosalie for having a child to dote on? Would she even want children of her own? These were things that would be revealed in a normal courtship, but ours was anything but normal. I had to ask.

"Which do you envy, Emma or Rosalie?"

"Both, I suppose. Emma because she has a mother to care for her and teach her. Rosalie because she has achieved everything I had hoped I might have."

"Do you not hope for it any longer?"

Her eyes dropped to the floor, then to glance around the room as she spoke with a small voice. "Hope is a luxury to me now. One that costs me far too much. It is much more sensible that I keep to what I know. The certainty that I can rely on myself and provide for myself and my father is what I hold to. Hope is a rare and dangerous thing."

I knew exactly what she meant. To hope and have those hopes dashed was heartbreaking. One could only endure so much heartbreak before it comes crashing down. I understood, but it was unthinkable to me that she was unable to allow herself to hope or want something more. I would find a way to give her hope. To show her she could want more. Holding my hand out to her, I asked for her trust.

"Will you come with me? I have something for you."

Her eyes snapped to mine before looking back at my hand and finally placing hers in it. I closed my fingers around hers and squeezed. Pulling her along, I made my way to the conservatory. I had asked Tyler to set it up, leaving the reveal to me.

Asking her to close her eyes, I placed her just inside the entry, while I walked to the center of the room and called to her. "Open your eyes, Bella."

Opening her eyes, she glanced around the room before settling her gaze back on me. Shaking her head she asked, "How? When did you do this?"

Holding my hand out again, she immediately came forward and took it. I pulled her into my arms and held her as I spoke. "I had much help. It is not easy to locate roses this time of year. Does it meet your liking?"

I knew her answer before she ever spoke. The room was truly stunning. Tyler had found roses in many shades and had placed them all in pots in the conservatory. They framed the windows and would be lovely in the spring and summer when the garden outside would be in full bloom as well. In the front rotunda was now a small sitting area with cushions and pillows on the seats as well as a small table which held a few books.

She let her eyes move slowly about the room before finally settling back on me. She did not meet my eye as she spoke this time. "It is too much. It is more than I dreamed. Thank you for allowing me to see this room in all it's beauty once again."

Placing my palm against her cheek and tilting her face to mine, I placed a soft kiss on her lips before looking intently into her eyes. I needed her to hear me clearly.

"Bella, it is but a small piece of what I want to give you. I want you to dream and to hope for these things. If for no other reason than that I will benefit from the joy on your face when I sometimes exceed your expectations."

Suddenly, she wrapped her hands around my neck and pulled me toward her, kissing me firmly and with a passion I knew she possessed, but held inside. Then just as suddenly, she broke the kiss and tried to pull away.

"Forgive me. I have behaved in a – "

I crashed my mouth back to hers, pulling her tightly against my body with one hand on the small of her back, while the other wove into her hair and held her in place, allowing me to deepen the kiss. The desire I felt for her grew stronger each day and was becoming unbearable. Her soft lips and smooth tongue would be my undoing. I could only imagine that if kissing her was this pleasurable, I would be unable to control myself if I were ever granted access to another part of her body. Groaning with that thought, I pulled away from her, leaving her with labored breath and wild eyes. She was a passionate creature, indeed. How I desperately wanted to be the object of that passion.

At that moment, the door flew open and my niece bounded into the room demanding the attention of her new aunt. Tyler followed her in and asked if I were available to meet with a gentleman who had arrived with business to discuss.

"I will meet with him. Please show him to my study and let him know I will be available shortly. Thank you, Tyler." Turning back to the room, I excused myself and kissed Emma and bid her a good morning before I left the room, promising that I would show her my new horse after her midday meal.

Arriving at my study, I pushed the door open and stepped inside to find Justice Clearwater seated in front of the fire. He stood as I entered the room.

"Mr. Cullen, I hope this morning finds you well."

"It does, sir. Have you some information for me?"

* * * A H R * * *

Standing at the window, I could see the clouds rolling in and knew that it would be only a short time before we were once again shrouded in rain. I would be unable to bring Emma for a ride today after all. I wondered how a child of her age found entertainment in an estate such as this one without other children. Mrs. Cope's son was staying with an aunt for the week to relieve Mrs. Cope to see to preparations for the Ball. It was sure to be a lonely place for Emma without a companion.

Clearly, my mind was trying to avoid the one thing I needed to consider most. The pressing question being how to present Bella with the information I had been given by Justice Clearwater. How could I expect her to react? How were we to proceed?

Looking out once again, I could clearly see Bella and Emma coming out of the woods behind the rose garden. They were laughing and skipping together and I could not help but smile at the unbridled joy on their faces. Bella's cheeks were flushed and her eyes sparkled and it was the most glorious thing I had ever seen. I had never seen her look more beautiful. She seemed carefree and happy. It was the most hopeful I had felt about her since she had come to the estate.

My mind was drawn back to the papers on my desk. Thin sheets of parchment that held the power to crush her or possibly give her a new start in life. I was impossibly fretful regarding her response to the news I had for her. Walking over, I lifted the paper from the desk and let my eyes drift to the most important words on the document. The words proclaiming our marriage valid and binding.


	15. Stories and Sorrows

**Still don't own anything.**

**I will be traveling out of state to stay with the in-laws for Christmas, but the next chapter is finished and I am working on the one after that (it's my favorite!), but I will not post either one until I have cleaned them up a bit. So, for sure by a day or two after Christmas at the latest.**

**As always, you amaze me with your kind words and encouragement. Thank you for reading and for letting me know what you think. If I don't post before then, Merry Christmas!**

**So... this one gets a little tough toward the end, but bear with me, I am always a HEA girl.**

BPOV

As Edward walked out of the conservatory to see to his guest, I turned and faced the little girl now watching me with undisguised curiosity. Knowing she had my attention, she smiled widely, her whole face lighting up as she spoke.

"Aunt Isabella, you have pretty flowers. Can I smell them?"

I could not help but glance around the room at the fragrant blooms. They were beautiful. It was overwhelming the effort he was making. I had never had anyone display such interest…no…it was devotion. He was devoted to my happiness and comfort. Romantic dinners, walks, caring for my father, dresses, silver cups, flowers, and the most glorious of kisses.

I loved it.

I loved him.

I sucked in a sharp breath as the realization that I had been denying hit me with great force. I was in love with him. He had made it difficult not to love him. It seemed as though he wanted more. He had told me he wanted more, so it could not be doubted. What did this mean for me? How was I to move forward with the annulment still unsettled and with nothing to offer him in the way of a dowry. Of course, the dowry seemed to be unimportant since we were already married.

For a moment, I was so lost in my thoughts that I did not remember I was not alone.

"Aunt Isabella?"

Turning to face Emma, I smiled and nodded. She ran to the closest bloom and pressed her little nose right into the flower. I could not help but laugh at her antics.

"Emma, would you like to see the flower garden I played in when I was a little girl?"

She nodded enthusiastically, so I encouraged her to retrieve her cloak and meet me back here. I quickly found my shawl and all but ran back to the conservatory. She was already waiting by the door, so I took her hand and led her into the outside garden. It was completely overgrown and winter bare, but it was still a lovely place. Several marble benches and a couple of fountains were placed strategically around the area to add to its charm.

Emma grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the gate. "What is out there? Is it more gardens?"

"Would you like to see?"

She began to jump up and down, causing her golden curls to bounce around her shoulders. Clapping her little hands together she begged, "Please, please can we go through the gate? I will stay close, I promise."

Taking her hand, I opened the gate and we walked through. There was a small field, then the treeline of the woods surrounding the manor. As we walked toward the trees, I began to tell Emma of my childhood.

"When I was just about your age, I would play with children whose parents worked here at the manor. There was a little boy who was my best friend and he used to play hide and seek with me just inside the tree line. There is a trail that leads a little way into the woods and then circles back to open into the other end of this field down by the kitchen."

She listened and asked the occasional question as I told her how we would play for hours then run into the kitchen where Mrs. Black would prepare tea with cream and honey and small cakes for us to enjoy. It was her son, Jacob, who had first shown me the great adventure of the wooded trail. He had left the estate as a very young man to be apprenticed to the blacksmith.

Finding the entrance to the trial, Emma and I played hide and seek for a bit. Once we tired of that game, we gathered leaves to make coal rubbings. Most of them had long ago fallen from the trees, but the color was lovely and the leaves were pliable enough still to enjoy them without crushing them. I could not remember a time when I had felt so carefree and alive. She was a precious child and I enjoyed her company very much. As we walked back toward the garden, she began to yawn and I knew I had probably kept her out a little longer than I should have. I would need to see that she had a mid-day meal and some rest.

Stepping back into the conservatory, we were met by Rosalie and another woman, who I assumed was the governess. Emma immediately ran to her mother and began showing her the leaves she had gathered. Rosalie smiled and nodded, listening as Emma told her of our adventures. Once finished, Rosalie sent her with the woman and watched them leave the room. Turning back to me, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath before speaking.

"It seems my child is enamored of you nearly as much as Edward."

"Rosalie, I am sorry if you had not intended for her to be out of doors. I should have asked before leading her out there."

She was waving her hand and shaking her head as I spoke. "I do not mind her being outside as long as she is accompanied."

She did not say anything for a moment, seeming to gather her thoughts. Finally, she looked back at me and began again. "I need you to understand that I have nothing against you personally, Isabella. You seem to be a pleasant and kind woman. The issue I have is in regard to the situation we all find ourselves in due to your marriage to Edward. Isabella, when Emma was born, the circumstances were difficult. The midwife informed us that it would be extremely difficult for me to carry another child to term. Emma will likely be the only child I will have. It is my responsibility to give her every opportunity. You must understand that a marriage of less than equal standing by a close family member will limit her prospects. Regardless of the circumstances by which it happened, the gossips will talk and her reputation as well as the rest of the family will sustain damage."

She was not saying anything that was not true. In fact, it was the very reason that I had insisted we not share anything publicly about our hasty marriage until we had some finality regarding the annulment. That did not ease the discomfort her words brought, especially with the recent realization of my love for Edward.

Rosalie took a step closer and caught my attention again before speaking. When she did, I felt the air leave my lungs.

"Isabella, there is something else you should know. My cousin, Tanya Denali, has enjoyed the beginnings of a courtship with Edward. There has been some discussion regarding their combined future."

"Were they engaged?'

"There was no engagement, but I believe there was an understanding, at least for her part. I can see that Edward has not mentioned this to you. However, I felt it would be best if you knew, especially since the Denali family will be attending the Winter Ball."

I was stunned beyond any thought. I walked over and sat on a well cushioned chair and tried to get my breathing under control. Rosalie stood silently watching for a moment, then addressed me one last time.

"I am truly sorry. I believe that under different circumstances we could have been very close friends." With that, she turned and walked out of the room, leaving me to the silence. I am not certain how long I sat just thinking things through and trying to make sense of it all. I wished I had my father to talk to. I had not seen him in a few days and missed him desperately. Finally resolving at least my immediate plans, I made my way to Edward's study.

Knocking lightly on the door, it was only a moment before the deep, velvety sound of his voice came from inside, bidding me enter. Opening the door, I walked inside and waited for him to acknowledge me. Looking up, his face lit up with a smile. He immediately rose and made his way toward me.

"I trust you have had a pleasant morning. I have missed you." He seemed so earnest that it was difficult not to respond to him with the same zeal. I simply nodded in response and looked out the window behind him as I spoke.

"I would like to see my father today."

He watched me with a cautious expression for a moment before nodding slowly and then finally answering. "Certainly. Allow me to finish signing some contracts and I will accompany you." He turned and began to walk back to his desk.

"No. I would like to go alone."

He stopped and turned to face me. I did not meet his eyes and after a moment he began to speak.

"Bella, are you well?"

"I am fine, Edward. I simply wish to spend the afternoon with my father."

Realizing I was not going to give him any other response, he called for Tyler. I assumed he was planning to send me in the carriage.

"The carriage will not be necessary. I can walk."

"Absolutely not! It is growing colder as the day progresses and rain threatens. If you will not allow me to accompany you, I will not allow you to walk. I will put you in the carriage myself if need be!"

Knowing it was an unwinnable battle, I nodded in defeat. A very short time later I found myself being assisted into the carriage by Edward's hand. Once I was seated, I rested my hands in my lap and whispered a 'thank you' to him and waited to be off. He stood for quite some time before heaving a sigh and shutting the door. As the carriage pulled away, it took every ounce of strength I had to not look back, knowing I would find him watching me depart.

I loved him, but I had allowed myself to lose sight of all that it would cost him as well as what the rumors might cost his family. I also had no guarantee of his love in return and I could not ask him to walk away from a woman that possibly did hold his affections. My head was beginning to ache with the concerns running through it. It was only when we arrived at the cottage that I was able to set the worries aside and feel joy at the prospect of seeing my father.

Opening the door quietly so as not to startle him, I entered the cottage and found him sitting before the fire, reading as was his routine. Upon hearing me enter, he turned and looked at me quizzically. I smiled and greeted him.

"Good afternoon. Have you a new book?"

He frowned at me for a moment before standing and laying his book on the table beside his chair. Making his way across the room, he never took his eyes off of me. Finally standing only a few feet away, he spoke, and for the second time in this day, I felt the very air leave my body.

"Can I help you, Miss?"

Carefully assessing how I should proceed, I answered him vaguely. "I was hoping to see my father, sir. I am sorry if I have disturbed you."

He smiled back at me as he answered. "Well, as you can see, I am quite alone at the moment. My housekeeper has finished for the day. Perhaps you can inquire regarding your father with her tomorrow."

"I will do that very thing. Is there anything I can do for you while I am here to compensate for having disturbed your afternoon?" If there was anything he needed, I could provide it, but I wanted nothing more than to make a quick escape at this moment.

"No, thank you, dear girl. I am well cared for. Good day." With that, he turned and made his way back to his chair before the fire. I quickly retreated out the door of the cottage and climbed unassisted into the carriage. Using my fist, I pounded on the side to let the driver know I was ready, and as we pulled away, I tried desperately to get my breathing under control. I was almost hyperventilating with the despair I felt in that moment.

My father had no memory of me. It might return tomorrow or the following day, or it may be gone altogether. For all intents and purposes, I had lost him. If Rosalie's words were true, I had no hope of a lifetime of happiness within Edward's family or with Edward himself if his affections truly were engaged elsewhere. I was alone. Utterly and completely alone.

I began to formulate a plan as the carriage made its way back to the manor. I would contact Justice Clearwater and inquire about the annulment. If it were not granted, I would ask him to seek a divorce. It would not affect Edward's reputation, and mine was of no consequence anymore. It was a clear solution to the issue of our forced marriage. As for me, I would begin this evening to write letters of inquiry for a position in a household. I was sure I could be hired as a cook or a housekeeper. I was strong and healthy and if I could earn a solid income, I was fully capable of taking care of myself.

Reaching the estate, I climbed from the carriage with Tyler's help and made my way to the door. Turning to look at Tyler, I took a deep breath and schooled my features into a blank expression before making my request of him.

"Tyler, would you inform Mr. Cullen that I am not feeling well and would like to rest this evening. I will not be joining the family for dinner."

"Certainly, Ma'am. Is there anything I can do for you? Perhaps I can call the physician from town to come this evening."

"That won't be necessary, Tyler, but thank you for your concern." I turned from his worried gaze and walked into the manor and straight up the stairs to my room. Once inside, I locked the door behind me sank down to the floor against the wall. Just needing to feel numb for a while, I sat watching the fire and breathing in the silence as the room became increasingly darker once the afternoon gave way to evening. I had no knowledge of how long I sat there, but several times there were knocks at the door that went unanswered. I knew I would have to face them, I just could not find the courage to do it tonight.

Finally, a soft knock and Alice's pleading voice caused me to rouse from the cold floor and unlock the door allowing her to enter. She stepped inside, carrying a tray filled with tea and toast.

"Edward said you found tea and toast soothing. I have been worried about you. What can I do to help you, Isabella?"

"There is nothing to be done, Alice." The double meaning of my words were not lost on her. She was very perceptive, like her brother, and she would not let it go without addressing it.

"Whatever has happened, whatever was said, it cannot be so awful, Isabella. He is beside himself. Please, tell me how to help."

"I want to sleep, Alice. Please let everyone know I am fine and I want to rest. I will see you in the morning."

"And Edward? What would you wish me to tell him?"

"She can tell him with her own mouth." Alice and I both spun to see Edward standing in the doorway leaning on the post. He was staring directly at me, but asked Alice, "Did she have anything to eat at all? Any tea?"

Alice shook her head and walked past him out the door. He stood there a moment longer before stepping into the room and walking over to the fire. Kneeling down, he began to rebuild from the nearly dead embers.

"You will truly be ill if you allow this room to stay cold. Why did you not call for someone to take care of this?"

"I can stoke a fire on my own." My voice was sharp and somewhat defensive as I was fighting to keep the tears at bay.

"And yet you did not. How is it, Bella, that you care so much for the comfort of others, yet have so little concern for your own. By neglecting your needs, you make me terribly uncomfortable and worried and at this moment, even angry."

Sighing, he stood and turned to face me. He looked hurt, anguished even. It broke my heart that I may have caused it. His voice was pleading. "Bella, please, talk to me."

"Please, Edward, I cannot."

"There is something that we need to discuss. Please, come sit." He took a step toward me before speaking again. "Please do not shut me out, Bella." It was a whispered plea that may as well have been shouted for the effect it had on me.

It took everything I had to hold myself together as I shook my head and turned away from him. He huffed out a breath and turned to walk out the door. Hearing him turn the handle, the tears began to fall down my cheeks and I could no longer hold in the sobs.

EPOV

I had no idea what had happened to her today. She had looked so happy with Emma near the garden and yet when I saw her only an hour later, she was closed off and defensive. It was as if all the progress we had made had never occurred. She had returned from her visit with her father and locked herself in her room, refusing to allow anyone entrance.

I was angry. I wanted the woman I had been with in the conservatory this morning. I wanted that warm, sweet, open woman, not this closed off, fearful girl who refused to let me help her.

Unable to endure another moment, I turned to leave her room, stopping at the door when I heard a whimper behind me. Glancing back at her, I was stunned at the sight before me. She stepped forward, grasping the arm of the chair near the fire and lowering herself to her knees on the floor.

She was weeping.

No, not weeping. She was sobbing. Harsh, uncontrollable sobs.

This was my Bella, who so rarely allowed a single tear to escape. Who held every emotion inside the fortress she had constructed around her heart.

I was devastated. How could I have even considered leaving her alone in this state? Closing the door and crossing the room, I knelt beside her and pulled her into my arms. She turned and buried her face in my chest, clutching at my shirt, pulling me closer.

"You are alright, Sweetheart. I have you." I began to gently rock her as she cried, but I could not discern whether it offered any comfort. She just continued to hold onto me and would occasionally sob out phrases having something to do with her father, being alone, and her future. After some time, I shifted my position, causing her to grasp tightly to me, panicking.

"Please, please Edward! Do not leave me, please!"

My heart was broken for her pain. I pulled her tightly against me, and placing my lips against her ear, I whispered, "I am not going anywhere, my sweet girl. And neither are you."


	16. Evading and ENOUGH!

**Don't own it, but Christmas would be merrier if I did!**

**The response to the last chapter was amazing! Some of you are furious with Bella and most all of you hate Rosalie... well, I know I said I didn't think I would be able to post this until after Christmas, but found a little free time while visiting with the family (not to mention the two day travel time in the car) and I was able to get a little more writing done. So, I wrote instead of responding to reviews. I hope you don't mind. Consider this early chapter, as well as the one I will post in a couple of days as my thank you bonus. You will never know how excited I get to see a new review. I love to know what you think.**

**Okay, so this chapter will probably make you even more frustated with Bella, but just know that our sweet, patient Edward has had his limit as well. He will call her out on it and the next chapter is the one I think you have been waiting for...hint, hint...**

EPOV

Two days. It had been two days since she had wept in my arms for hours. In the early hours of morning, she had calmed enough that I had been able to help her get out of her dress, leaving only her chemise. In that state of undress, it would have been unbearable had it not been for the despair she was lost in. Wrapping her in a quilt, I lay down with her and held her while she slept. Only once did I try to get up. She woke immediately, clutching again at my shirt, holding herself against me. I cradled her in my arms and did not attempt to leave after that.

I was at a loss to know what had caused her such distress. I was sure something had happened at her father's cottage, but she was upset before she had even left the manor to begin with. Surely no one had said anything to hurt her. I knew she had no seen Justice Clearwater leaving, so there could be no misunderstanding on the reason for his visit. I slept intermittently, spending most of the night watching her sleep and holding her tighter when she seemed restless.

Sometime around mid-morning, my mother had come in after knocking quietly, bringing tea and an assortment of items for breakfast. Placing it down on the table, she glanced at Bella's tearstained face and swollen eyes and smiled sadly.

"Is she better, now?" she asked.

"I can only hope." I whispered. "Please let everyone know I will stay with her today until she sends me away."

"No one expects you to be anywhere else."

She turned and quietly left the room. A few minutes later, Bella began to stir. Turning to face me, she frowned and looked intently at my chest rather than my eyes. Her cheeks turned a bright pink as she began to speak.

"Please forgive me. I am embarrassed by my behavior and I can only imagine that you are appalled. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable and if you wish me to – "

"Isabella, stop." I placed my fingertips over her lips to stop her rambling. She hastily pulled away from my arms and after firmly wrapping the quilt around her, she stood from the bed. I shot up immediately and walked around to face her. "There is no reason to be embarrassed. You were quite upset and as much as it pains me to see you distraught, I cannot help but feel fortunate to hold you close and offer you comfort. Please, Sweetheart, tell me how to help you."

"There is nothing to be done, Edward."

"Will you tell me what happened with your father? What upset you so?"

She looked around the room, trying to keep her emotions in hand. After a moment, her chin began to quiver and tears began to fall down her cheeks when she finally met my eyes.

"He did not..." She whispered, shaking her head and wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. "He did not know me. I was a stranger to my own father."

I pulled her close and held her against me, cradling her head against my chest and gently rubbing her back. She was much more calm than she had been a few short hours ago, but there was no less pain in her voice.

"I am so sorry, Bella." I did not know what to say that might bring her any comfort. I could not imagine the grief she must feel. After a moment, she pulled away and began gathering her brush and some clothing items. I was startled as the change was abrupt and I did not know what she was thinking.

"Bella?"

She stopped and faced me, looking at the floor in front of her. She would not look up, but the look of determination on her face was clear. Somehow, in those few minutes, she had managed to close herself off from me and I had not even seen it coming.

"Edward, I am to meet with your mother and Alice to discuss the final arrangements for the Ball. I would like to bathe before I do."

I was being dismissed.

She was clearly waiting for me to go. I was confused and could not understand what it was I had done to cause her to shut me out yet again. As I took a step toward her, she immediately stepped away from me.

"Please, I just need some time."

Heaving a sigh, I turned and walked to the door. Stopping just before leaving the room, I looked back over my shoulder at her and called her name. When she looked up, I spoke.

"We do have some important matters to discuss. I will be working in the study most of the day. Please come to me today that we may talk." When I finished, I did not wait for her to respond before walking out and closing her door behind me. I knew there was no sense in trying to engage her in conversation this morning. Perhaps she would be able to process some of what she was struggling with and we could discuss it calmly later. No, if I were honest, I knew she would not discuss it with me unless I forced her to. Truly, it may come to that.

That had been two days ago and she had yet to come to me to talk. She found things to do with my mother and my sister most of the rest of that day. There were preparations for the Ball that needed to be dealt with, of course. She had taken Emma back out into the woods behind the garden to play and explore. I believe she had even convinced Mrs. Cope to allow her to bring Emma into the kitchen, where they baked cookies and tea cakes. Yesterday, she had taken the carriage, at my insistence, into town to visit Pastor and Mrs. Webber and their daughter Angela.

She had been extremely quiet at meals, which went relatively unnoticed by anyone other than myself, since my dear sister can carry an entire conversation on her own. She had asked me for the use of my study to pen some correspondence. Of course, I willingly gave her use of the room and supplies. She made a point of surrounding herself constantly with Emma, Alice or my mother so there was never a chance that we might be alone. I thought I might go mad with the inability to have a meaningful conversation with her or even find a moment alone. I had not been able to inform her of the state of our marriage as I had no desire to do so with an audience. Worst of all, I craved just a moment of physical closeness with her. I had not kissed her in days and had not been allowed to touch her with the exception of assisting her into the carriage yesterday.

I was pacing in my study when Jasper found me. My father and Emmett had gone on the hunt today with several men from a nearby estate. I had some accounts to take care of and I had hoped to find a moment with Bella, so I stayed behind. Certainly, I had good intentions, but had not gotten anything done in their absence for trying to sort out the mess that had become my marriage.

"You do realize that you will be bald before you are thirty if you keep pulling at your hair so intently?"

"It is more productive than placing my fist into the nearest wall."

He laughed and pulled a chair across the room toward the fire. "Come join me, Edward."

I sat across from him and waited for him to ask me the question he had really come to ask. He did not disappoint.

"What has happened to Isabella?"

"I wish I knew. It is killing me, Jasper. She will not talk to me. She went to see her father and apparently his illness has progressed to the point that he no longer recognizes his own daughter. Certainly, she was distraught about that, but there was something that happened before she left that day. She had been fine that morning, but by mid-day, she was withdrawn and unsure of herself. I do not know how to get her back, Jasper. I fear I may have lost her."

"Have you told her?"

"Told her?"

"That you love her. That you wish to build a life with her. It has been my experience that women usually need the assurance of our affections. If, however, you have never told her, she would certainly be insecure."

His words shook me. I had not told her. How could I ask or expect her to open herself up to me when I had given her no security to do so. Currently she would give me no audience to declare myself to her, so to repair the situation would be tricky.

"She has been spending much of her time with Alice." His words pulled me from my thoughts. I knew she had been spending time preparing for the Ball, but I was uncertain if her time with Alice had resulted in a deeper friendship. Perhaps Jasper would know.

"Does she confide in Alice?"

"Edward, you know I would not betray her by telling you of their discussions. The truth is, I do not know. Alice adores her and is making every effort to build a solid friendship with her, but she also treads carefully with Isabella concerning anything having to do with you or the annulment. I am sorry, I wish I could report more encouraging news."

I nodded and turned to gaze at the fire. I would need to tell her. Perhaps she was simply waiting for me to make the next move. Admittedly, a part of me was worried that she did not return my affections. Reasonably thinking, however, I knew that she did. She just could not let herself own to it. Needing a plan, I turned back to Jasper, finding him watching me carefully.

"Jasper, can you assist me with something this evening?" He nodded cautiously and I continued. "Will you see to it that everyone is occupied after supper. I need a private audience with my wife."

* * * A H R * * *

"…and all of the service sets have been polished and are waiting in the pantry. Mrs. Cope has scheduled all of the younger girls to see to the flat trays while the gentlemen will handle the trays carrying crystal."

Alice was informing us of the final preparations for the Ball. We were enjoying our evening meal, but it seemed the only topic of conversation to be had was the Ball. It was truly exhausting. I glanced up at Bella. She was sitting in her usual spot, across the length of the table. She was not really eating anything, but rather seemed to be rhythmically pushing food around her plate so that it appeared otherwise. Still, she would not look at me.

My mother tried to engage her in the conversation. "Isabella, what have you decided regarding the ribbon on the wreaths and garlands decorating the front of the manor? I thought the red was lovely, but I know you are partial to the white."

She looked to Bella, waiting for her response. When she finally did respond, it was quiet and she did not look up from her plate. "Either one is fine with me. Please choose whichever you prefer."

Alice had informed me that Bella had been deferring to my mother on nearly every decision regarding the Ball. It seemed as though she had completely given up. I had watched it occur no less than four times at this meal alone. Suddenly, she spoke up, addressing no one in particular, but she held the attention of everyone in the room.

"Angela Webber has had some difficulty completing some projects that she has been working on for a local children's charity. She has asked me to help her tomorrow. I am afraid I may be detained there as I have agreed to help her. It would be best if you continue without me."

The room was silent as we took in what she said. I could feel the frustration building toward anger within me. My mother was the first to voice what we were all thinking.

"Isabella, tomorrow evening is the Ball. How is it you intend to be gone?"

"I will not feel comfortable attending the Ball. I have never even attended a formal engagement, not to mention it would be very awkward given the current situation that Edward and I find ourselves in. With the exception of Justice Clearwater, no one outside of those in this room knows of our circumstance and it will be much easier for everyone if there is no public knowledge. Once we receive word of the annulment, it will save a great deal of explanation for – "

"ENOUGH!" Slamming my hand down on the table, I pushed myself up to stand. She was staring at me in disbelief, as was the rest of my family with the exception of Emmett, who seemed amused. "There is to be no annulment, Isabella!"

She was stunned, but I could see when understanding dawned on her, then the anger began to bubble to the surface. Her eyes narrowed and she asked, "How long have you known?"

Watching carefully for her response, I answered her. "Three days."

She threw her linen napkin onto her plate and pushed her chair away from the table, muttering her 'excuse me' while keeping her eyes on me. She rose and immediately headed for the door. Taking quick strides, I caught up to her and caught her by the arm. She spun to face me, her face furious. I could hear my mother calling my name from somewhere behind me. I kept my eyes on Bella as I addressed my family.

"Please excuse us. I am certain you can find some entertainment for yourselves as Isabella and I have some things to discuss."

Emmett was roaring with laughter while my father and Jasper were not saying anything, but wore amused expressions. Isabella broke free from my grasp and headed in the direction of the library. It was then I heard my mother's voice.

"Edward, do not push her. She is angry."

I turned and immediately answered. "Yes, and in her anger, her guard will be down. This may be the best chance I have."


	17. Arguement and Admitting

**Don't own it... wish Ms. Meyer would give it to me for Christmas!**

**Merry Christmas everyone! Thought I'd post this as a gift to those of you who have so faithfully read and reviewed, and alerted, and favorited, and recommended, and well, you get the idea. Hope you all have a blessed day!**

**So... I really LOVE this chapter. Hope you do too! Let me know.**

EPOV

"Isabella!" I called out to her as she rounded the corner and entered the library. She did not stop, but walked directly to the fireplace, placing her small hands against the mantel and letting her head drop. She was visibly shaking and it took everything in me not to rush to her and offer comfort. Truly, in her anger, she would reject any comfort I might offer. I stepped inside, closing the door behind me, locking it, and placed the key in my pocket. It was only moments later that she turned to face me, her eyes on the floor between us.

"How is it you have kept this news to yourself for three days, Edward?"

"How is it you have not spoken to me in three days, Bella? How is it that I am expected to share delicate information when you will not grant me a private audience?"

Her eyes narrowed and she stepped toward me, gesturing toward the door behind us as she spoke. "Yet you would declare it in the presence of your entire family?"

I shrugged and walked over to a chair near the window. Sitting down, I leaned back and spoke slowly and carefully, knowing the words I said would upset her further. I worried that at any moment she would close herself off to me, but for this moment, I could push her a bit and perhaps she would respond without holding back. Her emotions were controlling her now and I desperately needed to use them to my benefit.

"It matters not whether the declaration was made in the presence of my family, half the town, or to you alone. It does not change the fact that we will remain married."

She turned her back to me and I watched as her hands clenched into fists at her side. Her breaths were labored as she fought to find a response. Finally, lifting her head, but still refusing to face me, she asked the oddest of questions. "And what of Tanya Denali?"

Tanya? How on earth did she know of Tanya? And of what consequence was my acquaintance with her? I had met Tanya two summers ago. She had attended a social event hosted by my mother. She was a sweet girl, but there was nothing between us. Of course, there had been the occasional social calls and perhaps even a dance or two at a local ball, but there had been no formal courtship. I had never even met her father. I could not fathom how Bella even knew of her. Surely Alice had not discussed her. Alice did not even like Tanya. She was Rosalie's cousin, and perhaps there was… my thoughts were stopped by that realization.

Rosalie had mentioned her to Bella. She had been keen to have a bond formed between Tanya and myself, but there was no attachment. At least there had not been for my part, and certainly no understanding of engagement. I wondered if it was Rosalie who sought the advance of the relationship, or perhaps Tanya herself. Either way, it did not matter, now.

"Tanya Denali is Rosalie's cousin. She is a pleasant lady and I am certain she possesses fine qualities, but I am a bit baffled as to why you inquire."

"Have you an understanding with her regarding your mutual futures?"

I am certain my mouth sat agape at her suggestion. "Let me be very clear on this matter. There is not, nor has there ever been an understanding of any sort between myself and Miss Denali. Any information you have received otherwise is either misguided, misinformed, or a blatant lie. She is nothing more to me than a casual acquaintance."

Bella stood quietly staring at the fire. What I would give to be able to know her thoughts. As well as I had come to read her, she still confounded me at times. Not willing to endure the silence, I spoke. "What of you, Bella? Are there gentlemen of your acquaintance that I should be aware of?"

In an instant, she turned and cast her angry eyes on me finally. "Do you have any idea what you imply, sir? There are no gentlemen willing to court a woman of my social placement. I have known only the company of my father for the last three years. It is ridiculous to assume otherwise."

"No more ridiculous than your assumption regarding Miss Denali."

"You have unlimited prospects available to you, sir. I do not."

"Stop it. Stop calling me sir. I am your husband and I have informed you of my preferred form of address."

"Alright, _Edward_, let us discuss the fact that we are still wed. I wish to see the document."

Standing from my chair, I walked to the desk to retrieve the requested document. Opening the drawer, I withdrew the papers on the top, placing them on the desk and reaching for the envelope, it was then that I noticed the writing on the paper I had just moved. It was written in a feminine hand and appeared to be a request for employment. Picking it up, I realized that it was exactly what it seemed and was written by My Bella. Holding it up, I took a deep breath to calm the building anger and asked, "What is this, Isabella?"

Seeing the letters in my hand, her face visibly paled. She leapt toward me to attempt to recover her letters. I held them just out of reach. "Tell me the meaning of this!"

"I must find a way to support myself, Edward. My father now has little or no memory of me, so it is not as if I can return to his home."

"You are my wife, Bella. It falls to me to provide for you. There is no question as to how you will be supported. What if you had posted these letters and had an offer of employment? Our marriage is valid and binding."

She said nothing, but turned her eyes to the floor. It was that moment that I realized her intentions. "Isabella, have you no desire to remain my wife?"

She did not answer.

"Isabella, look at me."

No response. She did not move her eyes from whatever it was that held her interest on the floor. Her jaw clenched and her breathing grew heavy.

"Is that what you want? To divorce?" I held my breath waiting for her answer. She gave none. The only sound in the room was her breathing. Finally she answered so softly I barely heard.

"It matters not what I want."

"It matters to me! How can I make you understand? Every need, every desire, every wish you have matters to me! What do you want, Isabella? What matters to you in this?"

She did not respond verbally, but her breathing grew even more labored and she began to tremble. Standing only inches from her, I fought the unbelievably intense urge to wrap my arms around her to offer comfort. Instead, I kept my eyes on her as I threw the letters into the fire. At her gasp, I spoke my belief to her.

"You do not want that life filled with unending toil and labor, Bella. You know what you want, but you are afraid to want it. You spend your days looking to the interests of others, but I will not allow you to sacrifice what you desire any longer!"

She turned from me and all but ran to the door. Twisting the knob in her hand and finding it unyielding, she turned to me. I held up the key and shook my head. Walking slowly toward her, I held contact with her angry eyes, certain mine were full of frustration as well. Placing the key back into my pocket, I made a final demand.

"We will not leave this room until you tell me the truth, Isabella! What. Do. You. Want?"

I had finally pushed her to her breaking point and nothing could have prepared me for her response.

"YOU! I WANT YOU! I WANT YOU TO LOVE ME AS I LOVE YOU!"

By the time she finished shouting, her eyes were wider that I had ever seen them and she immediately brought her hand up to cover her mouth as if she could not comprehend that her lips had formed the words that her heart had felt, but her head would not let her voice. As the tears began to course down her cheeks, I broke from the stunned immobility her passionate words had caused. Crossing the short distance, I crushed her against me, my mouth covering hers in a desperate kiss. Every feeling, emotions, desire and hope I had for her came out in that kiss. Placing one hand on the small of her back, and the other tangling into her hair, I held her tightly as I deepened the kiss. I could feel the tension leaving her body as she finally wrapped her arms around my neck, drawing me to her.

With a groan, I trailed my lips across her jaw and down the side of her neck, finally reaching her collarbone. As I continued to nip and suck at her sweet skin, her hands buried themselves in my hair, holding me in place. Her gasps and whimpers encouraging me as I kissed my way back up and once again claimed her mouth with my own.

It was glorious. I could feel her heart beating as furiously as mine at her admission. She loves me. She wanted me. She wanted me to love her. She had no idea how much of my heart she already owned. Realizing what I had done, I slowed the kiss and forced myself to separate from her lips. Resting my forehead against hers, I fought to get my breathing under control. I was desperate to give her the assurance she wanted. I had pushed her to make an admission, yet gave her nothing in return except my unbridled passion.

Leaning back and taking her face in my hands, I wiped her tears with my thumbs before making an admission of my own.

"I love you. More than life, My Bella. I have loved you since the first evening that we shared in this library, the night we were wed. If the annulment had been granted, I would have immediately begged you to marry me again. I cannot let you go. Please, do not ask it of me."

She was weeping, but smiling up at me. Lifting her in my arms, I carried her over to the sofa and sat, positioning her on my lap with her head on my shoulder. There were still issues that needed to be discussed.

"Tell me, Bella. Tell me everything. I want there to be no more doubts or worries."

"What of your family, Edward?"

"What of them? They adore you."

"Not all of them." Her words were whispered so quietly that had I not been holding her I would not have heard them. As it was, I found myself instantly angry at any one of my family members who had dared to hurt my wife.

"Who has upset you, love? Rosalie? She must have been the one to inform you of my acquaintance with her cousin. What else has she said to you?"

"It is not important. She said nothing that was not true."

Leaning away from her and grasping her chin to force her to look at me, I caught her eyes with my own and spoke sternly.

"Bella, it has taken much too long to get you to open up to me. Do not dare say that issues causing you discomfort of any sort are unimportant. Tell me what it is that is heavy on your heart and let me help you."

In an effort to calm her, I began to gently run my fingers through her hair and down her back. When she finally spoke, it was in a whisper as her eyes were focused on her hands pulling at the fabric of her dress. "I spoke with Rosalie a few days ago. She did tell me about Tanya. She also spoke of the damage to your family name were our marriage to continue."

She turned her face back up to mine and seeing the obvious fury on my face, she quickly tried to explain away Rosalie's behavior. "Edward, you must realize, she was concerned for her daughter. Emma's prospects would be limited if there were scandal involving a close relative. It would be better for all concerned if we were not wed."

"Better for whom, Isabella? Certainly not for me. I will not be without you. As for reputation, well, I care much more for happiness than reputation. Rosalie was in great error in speaking to you about this. If anything, she should have voiced her concerns to Emmett and allowed him to take them up with me. I am sorry for her heartless complaint to you."

"I would not consider it heartless. She was worried for her daughter. I can understand her concern." Her eyes turned to mine and filled once again with tears. "I have nothing to offer you, Edward."

Smiling gently, I pulled her close, and kissed away the tears that had fallen before cradling her head against my chest.

"You offer your heart. I need nothing more."

We sat together in the quiet room for a long while. Eventually, the room grew cold as the fire began to wane. Kissing the top of her head, I shifted Bella a bit urging her to look up at me. When she met my eyes, I blew out a breath and spoke quietly to her.

"Bella, I cannot find it in me to be apart from you. Will you lie with me tonight?"

Her eyes widened as she sucked in a breath. It was then that I realized she misunderstood my intentions toward her. "I – I did not mean we would…." Releasing a shaky breath, I tried again. "I simply want to hold you, Bella. I need to have you close to me. If you are uncomfortable, please forgive me. I have no desire to make you fearful."

She was watching me intently and finally gave me a shy smile. "I do not fear you, Edward. I would… I would like to be close to you as well."

Knowing the uncertainty she felt, I urged her to stand. Rising, I handed her the key and led her to the door. She reached for the lock with a shaking hand and had difficulty fitting the key. Placing my hand over hers, we unlocked the door together and walked through.

I did not release her hand, but held it as I led her to her bedroom door. Turning her to face me, I placed a gentle kiss on her lips and asked, "How long will it take you to prepare for bed?"

"Only about fifteen minutes."

"Then make your preparations, and I will return for you in fifteen minutes." With that I turned her toward her door and ushered her inside. Making my way quickly downstairs, I sought out Tyler to inform him that Mrs. Cullen and I would be absent from the dining table in the morning, but would enjoy breakfast in our room. He grinned widely before recovering himself and assuring me that he would inform the family.

Heading into the kitchen, I retrieved some warm milk from Mrs. Cope for Bella. She had barely eaten anything at dinner. I hoped the milk would fill her belly enough to allow her a good night's rest. Returning to my room, I placed another quilt on the bed in case Bella grew cold in the night. After seeing to the fire, I turned and made my way back down the hall to her room. I knocked gently on the door and waited for her response. It was several minutes before the door finally opened, revealing a very nervous Bella. She was dressed in a pale blue nightgown and was clutching at the matching robe, pulling it ever tighter around herself.

Reaching out, I pried her fingers from the fabric and held her hands in mine. "There is no need to be nervous, sweetheart. Come, let me get you into a warm room."

Pulling her with me, I led her to my room and sat her in the chair by the fire. It was an oversized plush monstrosity, but was the most comfortable seat in the house. Many nights I had fallen asleep reading by the fire in that chair. Once she was seated, I handed her the cup of milk from the side table. Seeing what it was, she looked up at me, her eyes becoming glassy.

"Thank you." She whispered before taking a sip.

"You are very welcome. Have you need of anything else?" She shook her head, looking back down at her cup. "Well then, rest here while I prepare for bed."

My normal nightly routine was to strip my clothing and sleep bare, but I knew this would not be possible. Finding a nightshirt in my wardrobe, I removed myself from the room to the watercloset to make my preparations.

Upon returning to the room, I found a very sleepy Isabella gazing at me through heavy eyes. Walking over to the chair, I placed one arm around her back and the other under her knees and lifted her slight little body, carrying her to my bed. Reaching the side, I stopped and looked down to see her watching me intently. I smiled as she lifted her face to mine and initiated a soft kiss. I was still indulging in her kiss as I lay her on the bed and then climbed in after her. Finally pulling away from her sweet mouth, I pulled the quilts up over us, tucking them in securely around her. Pulling her into my arms, I drew her in close to my side and held her securely. The room was silent for several moments until I heard a sniffle and then felt her tears on my chest. Alarmed, I quickly looked down at her.

"What is it, love? Please, I cannot bear it when you cry."

"They are joyful tears, Edward. I did not know I could be this happy."

"I love you, My Bella."

"As I love you."


	18. Morning and Meetings

**Happy New Year!**

**Still don't own it and didn't get Edward for Christmas either!**

**It seems like forever since my last post, but I struggled a bit with this chapter as the next morning for these two felt a bit awkward each time I rewrote it. So anyway, after all the travelling for the holidays, I am back home and writing up a storm, and my updates will be more regular again – say about three per week until it's done.**

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and encouraged me in this endeavor. I read every review and LOVE hearing what you think. I will try to be better about replies, but I thought you would probably rather have the chapter instead.**

BPOV

Warm. It was all my mind would register, the warmth of the bed and the room as I began to wake. I did not open my eyes, but could feel the warm sunlight from the nearby window and then feather-light touches on my cheek and lips. Opening my eyes slowly, I gazed into vibrant green staring back at me as he caressed my face with his fingertips. Edward. I had slept in Edward's room… in his bed… in his arms. After declaring my love for him. He had professed the same in return. He loves me. It was too much.

"I love you, My Bella." He smiled tenderly at me before leaning close, cupping my cheek with his hand and kissing me softly. "How are you this morning?"

I did not know how to answer. I was overwhelmed with all of it. He knew the truth about my father, about Rosalie's concerns, about my fears. All of it was laid before him and he still confessed to loving me. I could not help the tears that burned in my eyes. Immediately his eyes were filled with concern as his brow furrowed. Pulling me close, he asked, "What has upset you? Why do you cry, love?"

"You love me." I whispered in return.

"Truly, I do. But I had rather hoped that would be a source of joy, not tears."

"I cannot comprehend it, Edward. I never dared to hope you might love me. I love you so much that it creates an ache within me."

He pressed me back until he was hovering just above my face, supporting himself on his forearms. Leaning in closely, he gave me a mischievous grin and said, "Well, the ache I can certainly understand."

He captured my lips in a kiss that was different than any before it. There was a sense of urgency to it, as though he were desperate to connect. I kissed him back, opening myself to him, allowing him to explore my mouth with his own as my arms wrapped around his shoulders. He brought one hand up and cradled my head with it, tangling his fingers into my hair as his lips began a trek down my jaw, neck and onto my collarbone. They left fire in their path as I felt a need within me I did not recognize. I pulled him as close as I could manage and still felt there was too much space between us. He slid his other had from my waist up the side of my body, finally bringing it to rest over my ribs with his thumb gently grazing back and forth across the curve of my breast as his mouth claimed mine once again.

Such things I had never felt before and they were almost overwhelming to me. I could feel my heart pounding against my chest and I was sure he could as well. More. It was the only word my mind could think. More, please, MORE! I knew where this would lead. I had been very gently educated by Mrs. Webber after my mother had passed. When I was to have my first season and the possibility of courtship could occur, my father had asked her to speak to me. But she did not describe anything near the feelings…no… the intense craving I was experiencing at Edward's kiss and tender touch. The feeling was so strong it frightened me and pulled back a bit from him, trying to catch my breath. Burying his face in the curve of my neck and gently kissing the tender flesh just below my ear, he held me as his breathing slowed. Finally, he raised his head and waited until I met his gaze.

"You are so beautiful, Bella, and you tempt me beyond all reason. I am sorry if I have overwhelmed you."

It took me a moment to gather my thoughts, uncertain as to how I should ask him about what was happening between us. Taking a deep breath, I looked into his gentle eyes and found my courage.

"Edward, is this normal? Am I supposed to feel this...this…"

"Desire. It is desire you feel, Bella, and it is wonderfully normal." He shook his head and chuckled lightly. "I am so very glad to know you feel it as I have found it nearly impossible to keep from being overcome with my desire for you."

Raising himself to a sitting position, he took my hands in his and pulled me up to face him. Keeping hold of my hands, he looked intently into my eyes as he asked, "Bella, have you any knowledge regarding the ways of a man with a woman?"

I averted my eyes from his intense gaze, looking down at our joined hands. I could feel the heat on my skin and knew I must be coloring a bright shade of red as I attempted to answer him. "I – I do know what the – um – the act entails. I have no romantic experience save that which I have shared with you."

"And for that, I am overjoyed, my sweet wife." He smiled as he spoke, but his countenance quickly turned serious as he continued. "It is so much more than just the act itself, Bella. It can be an extremely pleasurable experience and I wish for you to desire me as I do you. I will wait until you are ready and show you the joys that await in our marriage bed."

I wanted to ask him so many questions. How was I to know when I am ready? Was he as nervous as I? There were so many things I realize now, could not be explained to a young girl. Things that could only be experienced with a husband to be truly understood.

Before I could ask him, there was a quiet knock at the door. Edward rose from the bed and offered my robe. I reached for it as he bid the intruder enter. Mrs. Cope entered the room with a tray, placing it on the table, then turning to smile gently at me.

"Can I bring you anything else?"

"No thank you, Mrs. Cope. Mrs. Cullen and I will send the tray back after our meal. Would you be so kind as to have my sister and mother meet with us here in an hour?"

"Certainly, sir. Enjoy your breakfast."

She turned and left the room as Edward uncovered our plates and pulled out a chair and gestured for me to join him. Wrapping the robe around myself, I sat in the chair. After pushing the chair in under me, he sat across from me and smiled widely. We enjoyed our breakfast in silence for a while, stealing glances at one another, sharing sweet shy smiles and the occasional giggle. Finally, Edward settled his cup on the table, took a deep breath and began speaking.

"I have something I would like to discuss with you." I nodded and he continued. "As previously discussed, I would very much like to present you as my wife this evening at the Ball."

I could feel the panic welling up within me. If he presented me as his wife there would be no going back. His family would be exposed to ridicule for his marriage to one beneath their standing, not to mention the scandal that my father's losses would cause them as well. Rosalie would be livid! I could not help but wonder at the response of the rest of his family to his plans. My thoughts were running wild and I had not even noticed that my breathing had become erratic. It was then I recognized Edward's voice calling out to me.

"Bella, Sweetheart, just breathe." Opening my eyes, I saw him kneeling beside me, holding my hands in his. "There you are, sweet girl. Stay with me, now, and just breathe slowly."

After a few minutes, I was breathing normally and Edward turned my chair toward him. He reached up and wiped away the tears that had fallen and then brought my hands up to his lips, placing a gentle kiss on each one in turn.

"Now, listen carefully. I know you are scared, Bella. I understand that you are worried about my family and their reputation. I know what Rosalie said has upset you. I will address her vile behavior today and you need not worry about her again. I told you that I did not care what others think, and that is the truth. You must also know that I will protect you from scorn and ridicule as well. I love you, Bella. I wish to proclaim our marriage from the rooftops, to let every person within a thousand miles know that you are mine, and that I am completely and irrevocably yours."

"Edward…" I whispered his name, stunned at his heartfelt words. He leaned in and placed a soft kiss on my lips before whispering against them.

"Please, trust me, My Bella."

"Yes." I pressed forward and kissed him once more before pulling back to see him grinning widely at me.

"Well then, if we are to make such a grand announcement, I should present my bride with a gift to commemorate the event." He stood and walked toward a chest in the corner of the room. Opening it, he removed a small bundle of silk and turned to walk toward me tentatively.

"Edward, I need no gifts. I have more than I could have ever dreamed. Please – "

"Nonsense. You may have more than you expected, but you will not deny me the pleasure of presenting you with gifts or tokens that I wish you to have. It brings me joy to give you things, Bella. Please allow me this."

I could not deny his earnest plea. I nodded in agreement and he smiled gently and stood behind my chair.

"Close your eyes and do not peek." I could hear him removing the silk and felt it as he draped it across my lap. "This is not something I chose for you, but something I knew you would cherish." I felt him place something around my neck and fasten it before pulling my robe and nightgown away as he placed soft, warm kisses from just below my ear to the hollow of my throat.

"Open your eyes, love."

I gasped in a sharp breath as I saw my mothers pendant around my neck. Tears sprang to my eyes as I looked to Edward. He knelt beside me, the fingers of his left hand gently tracing the pendant as it lay against my skin.

"When I asked you to purchase a gown, I never intended that you would pay for it, Bella. I cannot tell you how sorry I am that you felt you had to give this up for me."

"How – how did you know?"

"Jasper. He saw you in town that day. He directed me to Mr. Banner, who told me how you gave up items that you held dear just to survive the winters. You have them all once again, Bella. Like you, they are all here in this house where they belong."

I was weeping as he finished speaking and flung myself into his arms. He caught me and held me close. I was overcome with love for him. Was there nothing he would not provide? I could never repay him for what he had done for me, and yet he did not consider it troublesome at all! Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pulled him to me and kissed him with all that I had. I felt his sudden intake of breath at my unexpected attack, but he quickly recovered, pulling me into his lap and kissing me back with fervor. He placed his hands on either side of my face, tilting it slightly to allow him better access as his tongue sought mine. For a moment, the room was silent except for the occasional pop and crackle of the fire and the groans and labored breathing that our passionate kissing created. That moment was broken when we heard giggling and then a door closing behind us.

I ducked my head into Edward's shoulder as he placed a protective arm around my shoulders, holding me against him.

"Mother, Alice." His voice was low and gravelly as he spoke. He turned his head to face them as his mother began to speak.

"We did knock, Edward. And surely you could find a more comfortable place to engage your bride in pleasurable activities."

Edward laughed and shook his head. "I am certain I could, but there is something to be said for spontaneous moments." With that, he shifted us both and stood, helping me to rise with him. Turning to face his mother and sister, he pulled me close to his side as he began to speak.

"Bella has agreed to announce our marriage at the Ball. Alice, I was hoping that you would be willing to help her prepare for the evening as we have not yet engaged a personal maid for her. Perhaps your girl could be of service?"

Alice began jumping up and down and clapping her hands. "Jane is wonderful. Together we will have her ready and stunning for the Ball. Oh, Isabella, that necklace will be breathtaking with your gown!"

She was speaking so quickly and excitedly, I could barely keep up with her antics. We all began to laugh at her enthusiasm, including Alice. Edward turned to his mother and began to ask about the preparations and details of the event. Hearing their discussion, I turned to face Esme.

"Have you given direction on the ribbons for the front of the house?" She simply shook her head and waited for me to continue. "I prefer the red rather than the white. I would also like the conservatory lit with oil lamps and luminaries near the windows."

Before I could finish speaking, she wrapped her arms around me in a warm embrace. "You will make a wonderful mistress for this estate, Isabella. I am thrilled to hear you voice your preferences. I will make certain they are carried out."

When she finished speaking, Edward cleared his throat and made one more request.

"I have something of importance that concerns the entire family. Would you ask them to gather in the sitting room so that I may address them all together? And it would perhaps be prudent to engage the governess to care for Emma during our gathering."

I saw the concerned look his mother gave him before agreeing to his request. After a few more excited exchanges regarding the Ball, Alice and Esme left us alone once again. With more than a little uncertainty, I turned to face Edward. He immediately took my hands in his.

"Have no fear, love. I simply wish to discuss the announcement with the rest of the family. I would prefer that we are all of one mind."

"What of Rosalie. She will be upset."

"Rosalie will be more than upset, I can assure you. She will hold her tongue, or she will find herself alone at the inn this evening, as I will not have her opposing my wife on the very evening she hosts her first Ball in our manor." He was smirking at me and held more than a little mischief in his eyes.

"Come, let us get you to your room so that you may prepare for what is left of the morning. I am certain the staff will have questions for you and I would like to have some time to relax before the festivities begin."

Edward walked me to my room, kissing me softly before retreating back to his room to prepare for the day as well. I quickly readied myself, knowing that there would be time for greater pampering later. Leaving my room, I made my way to the sitting room where I found Jasper and Rosalie awaiting the rest of the family. Jasper immediately rose in greeting.

"Good morning, Isabella. How does the day find you?"

"I am well, Jasper, thank you." I could feel the blush rising on my cheeks as he smiled knowingly at me. I knew he was aware of the changes that had occurred in my relationship with Edward, but I could not help but feel a bit self conscious now that they knew. I heard the door open behind me and stepped aside to see Carlisle and Esme enter the room, followed by Alice. My nerves were a bit frazzled as I stood in the room with nearly the entire family without Edward. They were all smiling with the exception of Rosalie. She had yet to acknowledge me since the morning of our conversation in the conservatory.

The door behind me opened once more and Edward entered followed by Emmett. His eyes immediately sought me out, a wide smile gracing his features when he met my gaze. Worried as I was, I could not help but be calmed as his hand reached for mine, bringing it to his lips for a gently kiss. He continued to hold my hand in his as he stepped beside me and wrapped his other arm around my waist. Facing his family, he informed them of our plans.

"I intend to present Isabella as my bride at the Ball this evening and I –"

"You intend to go through with this farce of a marriage?" Rosalie interrupted Edward with a venomous glare at me.

"Rosalie! I expect you to address my wife with the respect she deserves as the mistress of this house –"

"Your wife? It was a forced marriage by a mentally incapacitated man, Edward! No one expects you to keep her. Think of your family. Consider the damage you will do to the reputation of those you care for. Think of Emma's prospects! You would allow this woman to dictate her future?"

I felt the weight of my marriage to Edward in that moment. I could see what it was costing them. I could not stop the tears that fell and turned to leave the room, unable to bear their disappointment. But Edward would not have it. He grasped my wrist and pulled me back to him, holding me against his chest as his arms wrapped protectively around me. At first, I did not hear the words he spoke, but felt the rumble as the angry words left him.

"I will not have it! You have insulted my wife and by extension, me. There has been no damage done. Isabella was born a lady and remains one to this day. However, your behavior this day as well as your previous words to My Bella would have me question your upbringing!"

Emmett spoke up addressing not Edward, but Rosalie. "What have you done, Rose? Have you insulted Isabella in her own home?"

I could no longer remain quiet and allow them to argue with regard to my place in their lives. "She did not insult me. She spoke the truth regarding the effect of this marriage on the entire family. She is concerned for her child's future and rightly so. If there is fault for discord in the family, it is mine alone. God help me, I have happiness in my grasp and I cannot help myself. I love Edward and I cannot bear to give him up." I spoke barely above a whisper by the end and could not control the seemingly endless flood of tears as they coursed down my cheeks.

Esme rose from her seat and stood in front of me, taking my hand in hers and reaching for Edward's hand as well. "Let me speak regarding your place in this family. I have always been and will remain very proud of my son. He is an honorable man, a successful businessman, an exceptionally kind person, and a son that any mother would be honored to call hers. But I have watched him come to life for the first time in the last few days. The fire in his eyes last night as he followed you from the dining room was passionate and alive, Isabella. And though it was a private moment, and I am reticent to reveal it, the look on his face as he held you this morning was one of utter bliss and adoration. I could not help but love you if for no other reason that you have given him that much joy."

Wiping the tears from my eyes, I glanced around the room watching the faces of Edward's family as they were nodding in agreement. Alice had tears in her eyes, but was grinning at me. Carlisle stepped forward, wrapping his arm around Esme and grasping our joined hands in his, squeezing them gently as he smiled at me. Jasper and Emmett were smirking at Edward, chuckling quietly at the blush that rose on his cheeks as well as mine, and while she did not look up from her lowered gaze, Rosalie did not speak out against me in that moment. I felt Edward's lips against my temple as he spoke quietly to me.

"You have a family now. You are not alone anymore, Bella."

I watched Emmett whisper something in Rosalie's ear, then gently lead her from the room. It was then that Alice stepped over to me, tugging at my arm.

"If we have any hope of having you ready for a grand entrance this evening, we had better get started. Say your goodbyes and we will be off."

I turned back to Edward who was smiling softly at me. He pulled me close and placed a quick soft kiss on my cheek before placing his lips at my ear and speaking softly.

"Until your grand entrance, Mrs. Cullen. I will be thinking about you this afternoon and looking forward to our evening amongst friends as well as our time together after the Ball when I will have you all to myself once again." He let his lips trail along my jaw, gently placing a kiss at the corner of my mouth before releasing me and stepping back. I am certain I stumbled a bit when he moved, but Alice's insistent tugging on my arm kept me from landing on the floor. I could hear Jasper and Carlisle laughing as we left the room and made our way upstairs to prepare for my first Winter Ball.


	19. Bathing Beauty and a Ball

**Don't own it, wish I did!**

**Longest chapter yet! It seems as though many of you are hearing about this story from someone as the traffic has increased dramatically over the last couple of posts. If you have found this story as the result of a recommendation, please let me know who sent you so that I can thank them!**

**Okay, so the ball...**

BPOV

There were still details to be determined. Where certain floral arrangements were to be placed, which silver needed a final polishing, and approval for the final decorations in the ballroom, dining room and the conservatory. Once these had been completed, Alice and I retreated to my rooms to begin the preparations for the evening. A copper tub had been brought to my room and was being readied for my bath. Jane, Alice's personal maid, was pouring scented oil and salts into the steaming tub and placing towels on the stool beside it. Alice pulled my gown from the wardrobe and laid it on the bed before turning to me.

"I will have Jane bring my things here and we can dress together if you are agreeable? I have missed you these last few days, Isabella, and I would very much like to spend the rest of this day together as we prepare. I will certainly lose you to my brother once again when we descend the stairs this evening." She was shaking her head and giggling as she spoke the last.

"I could not imagine another way I would rather spend my day, Alice." I looked away from her, worried about her response to my next words, but knowing I needed to speak them. "I have never had a sister, but I cannot believe I would have loved one more than I have come to love you. I am honored that you have accepted me so easily."

As I finished speaking, she wrapped her arms around me and whispered, "I could not love you more if you had been born my sister, Isabella." Pulling away, she wiped her eyes and smiled. "Enough crying for the day! It will be a joyous evening and I can hardly wait to see my dear brother's reaction when he sees you in all your finery! I will see you after we have had our baths. Relax and enjoy and do not worry about another thing."

She gathered her things and made her way out of the room. Jane returned and informed me that she would prepare our things in the outer sitting room attached to my bedroom and carried out everything except what was necessary for my bath. As the door closed, I removed my clothing and sank into the warm, fragrant bath. Leaning back, I began to reflect on how much my life had changed in just a couple of weeks.

I would never have dreamed that I would end up where I am now. How could it be that I was now inhabiting Collingsworth once again, not as a child, but as mistress of the estate? Married to a man who had so quickly become everything to me. He had entered my life as a stranger only a short time ago and now I could no longer imagine my life without him. What I spoke to his family earlier was true – I could not bear to give him up. His family. They were now my family. I had been given an entire new family when I had been on the verge of being entirely alone. My entire life had been renewed in the course of a few days. If I were truly honest, all hope that I believed lost was being renewed as well.

A light knock on the door broke me from my thoughts. Jane's voice soon followed.

"Are you well, Mrs. Cullen?"

"Yes Jane, thank you." Uncertain of how long I had actually been reclining in the tub, I bathed and reluctantly left the relaxing bath. Some time later, after applying the appropriate creams and perfumes, I dressed in my undergarments and began brushing through my hair as it dried. It was then that Alice returned to the room, grinning widely and barely able to contain her excitement. With Jane's help, we curled and pinned our hair and then rested by the fire with a small, simple meal before dressing for the ball.

"Edward has asked that we meet in the sitting room an hour prior to the time guests are expected to arrive. I asked Jasper to have him waiting at the bottom of the stairs for your arrival."

I was perplexed as to why she would suggest this. "Is there some reason you asked this of him?"

Alice looked at me as if I had grown an extra arm. "Of course there is, Isabella! I am sure my motivations are selfish, but I so wish to see his face when he first sees you in that gown looking as lovely and regal as any woman before. He is so in love with you that it will certainly be an extraordinary unveiling!"

If there were anyone I felt comfortable with, it was Alice. I was very nervous regarding what I was certain would occur this evening, both during and after the Ball. I could not help but seek her advice.

"Alice, may I ask you something?"

"Of course. You may always ask me anything."

"I am fairly sure that I can handle what is expected of me this evening. I have never attended a Ball, much less hosted one, but I am confident that there has been nothing overlooked that would reflect poorly on Edward."

"There was no question there, Isabella. What is it that troubles you?"

"Edward and I have not… that is to say, we are not, um…"

"Isabella, take a deep breath and relax. Are you seeking information regarding relations between a husband and a wife?"

I knew my face must be scarlet in my embarrassment, but I met her eyes and nodded before looking away.

"I was certain you had not been with my brother in an intimate setting based on the information that Jasper had given me. Your circumstances dictated that it would be difficult at best for you to develop a normal marriage relationship. Surely you must know the basic mechanics?"

I nodded, still unable to look her in the eye. She took a deep breath before continuing.

"You believe he expects this after the Ball?"

"I do not believe he expects it, but desires it. I - we both do." The last was only a whisper. She was silent and when I could bear it no longer, I looked up to find her grinning at me and shaking her head.

"I suspected as much. The tension surrounding you both suggested you desired each other and I am certain it will be _very _satisfying for you."

"Alice!" I was mortified that she would speak such a thing out loud. She simply laughed before addressing my embarrassment.

"Do not be embarrassed. It is a normal and natural thing, Isabella. If I know anything about my brother, he will be a gentle and caring lover. Trust him, he will not hurt you."

Jane chose that moment to reenter the room. Placing my teacup on the table beside me, I rose and joined Alice and Jane near the bed to prepare our gowns for dressing.

* * * A H R * * *

Alice was beautiful. Her dark hair was pulled up in a soft twist adorned by pearl pins that matched perfectly the pearl choker around her neck. Her gown was a lovely deep shade of scarlet with delicate lace trimming the edges of her sleeves and collar. I was certain I would be plain and dull compared to her as we descended the stairs. I could feel my nerves getting the best of me as she took one last look in the mirror before leaving the room.

"Come, have a look, Isabella." Alice gestured toward the mirror as she stepped back. Taking a deep breath, I stepped forward and gasped at what I saw. Not the young unsophisticated girl I had expected, but an elegant young woman. Her curves accentuated by the cut of her gown, her skin glowing from the preparations made previously as well as the color draped on her body that showcased her complexion. Her hair twisted up with soft curls draping and framing her face…

"Alice…" My thoughts were lost as she placed the pendant around my neck and smiled at me in the mirror.

"You are lovely, Isabella. You just needed to see it to believe it. You will take Edward's breath away tonight and I, for one, am anxious to see it! Come!"

Clasping my hand in hers, she pulled me out of the room and down the hall. Jasper stood waiting for us just before we rounded the corner to the staircase.

"He is in position, just as you asked. Although, I must say, he seems a bit out of sorts. I believe a sight of his dear wife will help calm him a bit." He turned to me and took my hand in his, bringing it to his lips and kissing the back of it sweetly. "Isabella, you have brought a completeness to Edward that I have never found in him in all the years I have known him. It is a joy to know that he has brought you such happiness as well. Please, enjoy this evening and know that it is a pleasure to have you as my sister."

I felt my eyes well with tears at his kind and sincere words. As he turned from me to greet Alice, I could not help but notice the adoration he held in his eyes for her. Neither of them noticed as I stepped away. Truly, I believe they noticed nothing but one another at that moment. Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly to calm myself, I stepped forward toward the landing at the top of the grand staircase.

He was there. Standing beside the newel post, with one had casually resting on the carved ornament that capped the post, he was looking toward the ballroom. I took the moment before descending to appreciate his beauty. He truly was beautiful, inside as well as out. The cut of his formal attire accented his broad shoulders, his slim yet muscular build, his long, lean limbs. I had never seen him look more handsome and regal.

As I placed my hand lightly on the banister, he turned his head toward me, the intensity in his glorious green eyes stealing my breath as he locked his gaze on me. His lips parted slightly as he stood stock still for a moment before taking a step forward and beginning to ascend the stairs.

EPOV

I do not know what I expected, but it was certainly not the vision I saw before me. Bella is always beautiful, but to see her as she should have always been – dressed in silks and satins, in ribbons and jewels, her eyes shining with excitement – caused the breath to leave my body. I could not deserve her, yet here she was. Mine.

I made my way up the stairs to her, knowing I would never be able to wait for her to come to me. I had to touch her. To make certain she was real. Our eyes never broke contact as I climbed the steps as quickly as I was able without stumbling. Once I finally reached her, I took her hands in mine, bringing them each to my lips in turn, never looking away from her eyes. When I finally spoke, the words were but a whisper.

"You are stunning, My Bella. I – I have no words." Reaching up, I ran my fingertips gently down her cheek. Leaning her face into my palm, she smiled.

"I love you, Edward. So much." Her words were a whisper, but nearly knocked my feet from under me with their intensity.

Leaning toward her, I brushed my lips against hers before whispering against them, "As I love you, Bella. You are my life now. My reason for existence." Pressing my lips to hers more firmly, I felt her relax and lean into me. Wrapping my arms around her, I held her close as we lost ourselves in the tender kiss. That is, until my sister chose that moment to remind us we were not alone.

"Edward, if you wrinkle her or press a hair out of place, I will steal her away to repair it and you will have to wait for her once again." Stepping forward so that only Bella and I could hear, she spoke quietly as she continued. "However, after the Ball, I am certain you will find much joy in wrinkling and removing every scrap of silk, and I will promise to be thrilled if you do!"

I could not help but laugh at Alice's statement as well as Bella's horrified expression. Turning my face into her neck, I placed my lips at her ear and whispered, "The question is, my love, would it thrill _you_?" Gently sucking her earlobe as I pulled away, I felt as well as heard her intake of breath. Hmm… I would remember that response for later. Looking at her flushed face as her eyes met mine, I saw apprehension, but it was mixed with something else. Her gaze was intense and that was when I realized it also held _desire_. "Come, love, for now we must be good, but this evening holds much promise, yes?"

She smiled and averted her eyes. I took her hand and placed it in the crook of my arm as I led her down the stairs to the rest of my waiting family. I was certain they had all come out to watch the unveiling of my bride to me, and yet I had been so enamored of her, I had not even noticed. Upon reaching the floor, she was quickly whisked away by my mother and Alice once again. Rosalie stood to the side, trying to soothe an upset Emma. She was being sent to the governess for the remainder of the evening, but of course, wished to stay for the festivities. Emmett approached me after kissing his daughter goodnight.

"Edward, I am truly sorry for the callous behavior of my wife. I have no other excuse save that she was overly concerned for Emma."

"There is no need for you to apologize, Emmett. I understand why it occurred. In fact, I am certain she is correct. There will be rumor and gossip, but it will recede, and there will be no long lasting effects from it. Isabella's circumstances were beyond her control and through no fault of her own. I am beginning to believe there was no fault on her father's part either except his failing health. I have strong reason to believe that he was taken advantage of by one in his own household. Should it be proven true, Isabella's place in society will be restored with greater wealth than she enjoyed prior to the events that led to the loss of the estate. In that event, my marriage will be seen as a beneficial coupling to all parties involved."

"But you have no care whether it is true or not, have you?"

"In truth, I do not. I would love Isabella and claim her as my wife regardless of any state we find ourselves in. If I am able to restore what rightly belongs to the Swan name, more the better."

My father and Jasper had joined us at some point, and were nodding in agreement. I knew my next statement would be a bit controversial.

"Emmett, regardless of everything else, Isabella deserves an apology from Rosalie. I do not want it spoken of obligation, but genuine remorse for having hurt my wife. If she cannot offer it by the end of the week, I must ask her to leave my home – Isabella's home."

My father and Jasper stood staring in disbelief at the ultimatum I had placed on my brother. I am certain it appeared to them that I had chosen Bella over my own brother. In truth, I suppose I had, but I had vowed to protect the woman I love and that included those members of my own family who would hurt her. It was only a moment before Emmett nodded at me, smiling slightly.

"I understand and I must say, I am proud of you, Edward. You are a fine husband and Isabella clearly loves you in return. Your protection and concern for your wife is honorable and we would do well to heed that example. I cannot guarantee that there will be reconciliation between our wives, but I will do my best to bring it about."

I placed my hand on his shoulder and gave it a slight squeeze as I addressed him. "Thank you. I know this must be a difficult position, but you are always welcome here, as is Rosalie when she accepts my wife as a sister."

"Edward?"

My mother's voice summoned us from our conversation. "Perhaps you should inform us how you would like to proceed this evening. Your guests are beginning to arrive."

Walking over to take Bella's hand in mine, I turned to give them my plan. "As our guests are arriving, they are being treated to various refreshment and accommodations. I would prefer that we remain here for the time being and await a summons from Tyler. He will come for us once most have arrived and we will be announced to the gathering. The rest of the evening is yours to do as you please. I believe the staff will have everything in hand and Tyler will contain any disruptions that occur."

We were all in agreement, as this was the fashion that my parents were accustomed when receiving guests for a formal social gathering. It would only be a short wait and most of my family simply chose to converse casually with one another. Tugging gently on Bella's hand, I pulled her a few paces away from the rest of them as I wished to have a moment alone with her. I had not had a chance to speak with her after the events of this morning and wanted to be certain that she was not rattled by the vile words spouted by my sister in law. I knew she was upset as she turned to leave the room, but I could not allow it. She had more right to stay than Rosalie – it was our home, after all! I held her tightly to me, not caring how it was perceived by the rest of the family. I must admit, I thought I might explode with joy, as well as a strong dose of desire when she declared herself to my family! To say that she could not give me up had me fighting for control. All that my heart and body wished for in that moment was to drag her back to the privacy of my room and claim her completely for there was no doubt that I _would not_ give her up.

Gently grasping her chin with my thumb and forefinger, I lifted her head to look into her eyes as I spoke. "Isabella, surely you must know that I love you above any and all else in this life. It will be my proudest moment to enter that hall with you on my arm, as my wife. Regardless of anything else that is said or done this night, that will not change."

"It is my honor to be your wife. I would never have thought it to happen this way, but I would not change it if I were able. I love you." She leaned in to me and placed a soft kiss on the corner of my mouth. I would have more, however, and turned quickly to capture her lips in firm kiss. After a moment, she pulled back, glancing quickly toward the others in the room before smiling shyly at me and leaning close to whisper so that only I could hear.

"A promise of things to come, husband?"

I was sure that my eyes were as wide as saucers. As innocent as it was, it was the most forward thing she had ever said to me directly. Of course, my body heard it as well and I struggled to keep it under control. Closing my eyes, I shook my head as I whispered my answer against her lips.

"Be merciful, my Bella! How am I expected to endure this evening with the echo of those words in my head? Have you any idea what you do to me? Have you any idea what I wish to do to you?" Kissing her soundly one last time, I stepped back, smirking at her reddened cheeks. She had begun the teasing, but was wholly unprepared for the reciprocation. Chuckling at her timidity, I wrapped my arm around her waist and turned her to join the rest of my family.

Moments later, Tyler entered the room, informing us that our guests were prepared for our entrance. Emmett and Rosalie were presented first, followed by Jasper and Alice. Finally my parents proceeded through the door, leaving just Bella and myself. Pulling her hand once more to my lips, I kissed her fingers, squeezing them gently while mouthing 'I love you' to her excited eyes as I pulled her toward the door.

BPOV

"Ladies and Gentlemen, your hosts for the Winter Ball, Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen!"

As soon as Tyler finished the announcement, we stepped forward into the hall to the applause of our guests. There were dozens and dozens of people, some I knew and some I was sure to be introduced to before the evening was over. While the polite applause continued, I also heard a few gasps of recognition as well as sighting some shocked expressions. Edward reached across and patted my hand that was nestled in the crook of his arm, smiling gently at me as we walked forward and took our positions for the first dance of the evening.

It was surreal, standing in this room, dressed in the most beautiful gown I had ever seen, dancing with the most handsome man in the room. I had no point of reference for the joy and happiness that I felt at this moment. Feeling his gaze on me, I looked up and met Edward's eyes. He was still smiling and for the remainder of the song, never took his eyes off me.

Once the music ended, Edward reached for my hand and led me toward his parents. They were speaking with another couple and Carlisle immediately introduced us as we approached.

"Garrett, Kate, this is our new daughter, Isabella. She and Edward were married a few weeks ago. Isabella, these are our dear friends, Garrett and Kate Denali."

Placing my hand in his, I gave a slight curtsey as Garrett raised it to his lips.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Isabella." Turning to grasp Edward's hand, he added, "She is lovely, Edward. Congratulations."

"Thank you, sir. She is a treasure."

Mrs. Denali spoke up, seeming to inspect my appearance as she did. "Have you made the acquaintance of our daughters, Tanya and Irina? They are near your age, I believe."

"No, ma'am, I have not yet had the pleasure. Are they in attendance this evening?"

"Of course! They would by no means miss the opportunity to see the Cullens!"

The conversation continued as I began to look around the room. I had not remembered that Rosalie's cousin would be here. I could feel the nagging doubt begin to surface. Was she beautiful? Had Edward already noticed her? What had Rosalie told her regarding my place in the family?

I had not noticed that I was fidgeting nervously with my necklace until I felt Edward reach up and take my hand, forcing me to release it and focus on him in its place.

"Isabella, it matters not to me whether she is here or how she appears. You hold every moment of my attention this evening and I promise not to leave your side."

At his words, I felt the tears stinging my eyes and tried to look away. He caught my chin in his grasp, holding my gaze.

"Please do not cry, love. This is your night."

Wishing nothing more than to make him proud of me, I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and squared my shoulders. Opening my eyes, I looked directly into his and gave him a genuine smile. Tonight, this was my home, my Ball, and I would honor my husband as the gracious hostess he needed, and hide away the scared girl I felt on the inside.

"Come, Edward, our guests await." Placing my hand once again in the crook of his arm, we continued to greet our guests and dance for quite some time.

* * * A H R * * *

Several hours later, my feet were aching from dancing and I was in desperate need of refreshment. Edward led me to a chair and once seated, knelt in front of me.

"Would you prefer to sit while I get you something to drink? I can ask one of the staff to retrieve it if you would rather I did not go."

"I will be fine, Edward. Please, go. I know you must be thirsty as well."

He stood, leaning over to place a kiss on my cheek and whispering in my ear, "I am so very proud of you, my Bella. I am honored to have you on my arm tonight." Smiling widely, he turned and walked away.

Hearing someone approach and sit, I turned to find Lauren Mallory beside me. I was uncertain as to her disposition, so I waited for her to speak. She took in a shaky breath before turning to meet my eyes.

"I have missed you, Isabella. I cannot tell you how much I wanted to see you." A tear escaped her eye and she quickly wiped it away before continuing. "My mother forbid me from seeing you. She was determined that my place in society would be damaged by association. I will forever regret allowing it. I am so sorry."

"Lauren, your mother was acting in your best interests. She was always kind to me and I understand her concern as you were entering your first social season. I have missed you as well."

After an emotional embrace and a few giggles, Lauren looked across the ballroom to see Edward watching us.

"He is very handsome, Isabella. My parents were hoping, well, I am sure they were hoping for the same outcome as every other parent of an unmarried female in the county. You seem happy, though. And he seems so very devoted to you. Are you happy?"

"I am more happy than I can tell you. He is everything to me."

"I can see it on your face. I am thrilled for you. Will you introduce me?"

Once Edward made his way back to us, I introduced him to Lauren and eventually to several other families from the town that he had not made acquaintance with. It did not escape my notice that there were several cold stares and even a few people who left immediately following our introduction. I vowed to be unencumbered by their callousness this evening. I knew I would deal with it eventually, but this evening belonged to the Cullens and to Edward. I was hopeful that the scandal would die quickly and that we would be able to move forward.

All too soon, it was time for the final dance of the evening, which I gladly shared with Edward before standing in the foyer and bidding our guests good night as they departed. There were a few who were staying at the manor as our guests. They had traveled quite a distance and would be traveling back in a few days. The manor was certainly large enough to accommodate many more than those staying with us and was therefore not an inconvenience.

Returning to the ballroom, Edward excused himself to find Tyler, needing to give him some instruction regarding the morning meal for our guests. Pouring myself a cup of tea from the sideboard, I sipped it as I waited for him so that we could retire together. It was only moments before a stunningly beautiful woman approached me.

"How did you manage it?"

"Pardon me?"

"How did you manage to ensnare Edward Cullen? I cannot fathom it. There was nothing I could not offer him, nothing I did not try, and yet here you are. In his family, his home, his bed. How did you beguile him?"

A proper response escaped me. I did not know this woman and I did not wish to dishonor Edward by speaking to her rudely. I was at a loss until Rosalie approached from behind me to address this woman.

"Isabella, I see you have met Tanya. Lovely, is she not?" Quickly covering my shock, I answered as civilly as possible.

"She is. Welcome to Collingsworth, Tanya. I trust you have everything you need for your stay with us?"

She smiled a hauntingly cold smile as she replied. " Not yet, but I am certain I will."

With that, she turned with Rosalie and walked out of the room. I did not have time to consider the obvious implication of her words as all thought ceased when Edward's arms wrapped around me from behind. He placed his lips at the back of my neck and slowly kissed his way around and up to my ear where he gently bit on the tender lobe before sucking it into his mouth. Glad for the support of his arms, I sucked in a quick breath as he chuckled softly before nuzzling into my hair and whispering, "Come, my Bella, I wish to have you alone."


	20. Anger and Passion

**I own nothing.**

**I am blown away by your response to this little tale. I have struggled to get reviews out for last chapter, but I did read them all and you could never know how much it means to me that you take the time to let me know what you think. Thank you!**

**Okay, so keep in mind that this is my first fic and I have certainly never written anything like this chapter before. I actually rewrote it a few times and am still biting my nails over it. I know the start will look bleak, but hold out for the second half – hopefully the payoff is worth it. Let me know if you think so…**

BPOV

I could feel my nerves getting the best of me as we climbed the stairs. The evening had been a grand success and more romantic than I could have dreamed possible. The only dark spot in all of it had been the introduction to Miss Denali. I had no idea whether to address the situation with Edward, or to handle it myself. Had he heard any of our conversation? If he had overheard, did he perceive me to be an ungracious host to his family friend? Did he realize how badly she wanted him? As we reached the hallway leading to the bedrooms, I could not gather my thoughts. Stepping in front of me to block my path, Edward placed his hands on either side of my face, forcing me to meet his eyes.

"What on earth is going on that head of yours? You have become quiet and tense, and I must know what has caused you distress. Please." Suddenly his eyes widened and he took a step back, taking hold of my hands. "Oh God, Bella, I know we have been teasing all evening and you must know how much I desire you, but please believe that I would _never_ press you to do anything you were uncomfortable with!"

He dropped my hands, lifting his to run through his hair and scrub over his face as he turned and stepped away from me. "Please forgive me, love, I had no intention of causing you discomfort. Good night, Bella." He took a few steps away, heading toward his bedroom door before I found my voice.

"Will you go to Miss Denali, then?"

He stopped abruptly and turned to face me, his green eyes blazing into mine so intensely that I found it difficult to draw breath. When he spoke, it was quiet, but firm.

"Explain yourself, please."

I took a step back and looked away under the intense scrutiny of his gaze and I could feel my breathing growing labored. I could not define the emotions swirling around us in that moment. Certainly there was anxiety, worry, a bit of fear, but the foundation of it all was the intense desire for connection. Both emotional and physical. I feared that if he did not find it with me, he would find a very willing partner in Tanya Denali.

"Isabella! Look at me." Bringing my eyes back to his, he held my stare as he closed the distance between us. "Tell me why you would ask such a thing."

The sound of footsteps behind me broke us both from the moment. Snapping his head up, Edward let his gaze follow something or someone down the corridor before reaching out to grasp my hand and pull me behind him into my room. He pushed the door closed harshly while muttering something about the staff knowing his personal affairs. Standing with his fists clenched at his sides, he once again pushed for answers.

"Have I given you any indication that I wanted Tanya? Have I, in fact, given you reason to believe I wanted anyone but you?"

I knew if I spoke, I would be unable to hold back the tears that were already threatening to fall. I shook my head in response to his questions, knowing my fairytale evening had come to an end. It did not escape my notice that he had escorted me to my room rather than his. This was not surprising given that I had so obviously angered him by concluding that he would bed another woman if he thought I was unwilling.

"Then why, Bella? Why would you assume it?"

Meeting his gaze, my eyes implored him to understand. "I am naïve, Edward. I do not know the ways a man thinks, but I am familiar with how the female mind works. She wants you for her own, however she may have you. She said as much. If she would declare it unashamedly to your wife, how could I – "

"Tell. Me. Every. Word." His voice was deadly calm as his eyes held mine unwaveringly.

"She said she could not fathom how I had beguiled you. How I had ensnared you to myself when she had tried all to win you. She insinuated that she would have you while here in our home." The last was only a whisper. I found I could not speak any louder as I watched the rage grow on his face. The only description my mind could register was beautifully terrifying. His handsome features were hard as stone in his fury, his eyes locked with mine as he stepped back as though afraid he might cause harm. I could not discern if he was angry with her for her brazen words or with me for my belief that they were true. Would he believe me to be disloyal? I had only a moment longer to wait before he turned away from me and I knew. I watched as he strode quickly to my wardrobe and opened the doors. Realizing he was gathering my things, I turned and walked to the window, unable to watch him packing my belongings. Moments later, I heard him leave the room, closing the door behind him.

Staring out into the darkness, the only light visible was the stars overhead. I had once again lost everything, but this time I did not believe I could recover. My spirit had been broken the last time, but this time it was my heart as well. He had disarmed me so completely and I could blame no one but myself for the wreckage that now littered my life. I felt the tears flow heavy and hot down my cheeks and I did not attempt to hold back the sobs as I sank onto the edge of the bed. I had no where to go, no one to turn to, but I could not find it in me to care as I wept bitterly.

I had no way of knowing how long it had been since he had left the room, but I knew I could not wallow in misery any longer. I wiped my tears and stood, straightening my gown. As I turned from the window, the door opened once again and Edward stepped into the room. I kept my eyes on the floor as he approached and held out his hand.

"Come, Isabella."

Timidly placing my hand in his, I gathered my courage and asked, "Have my things been placed –"

"In our room. Come, this room is cold." I followed, confused, as he pulled me gently to the hallway, stopping when he stood outside his bedroom door. Turning to face me, he frowned as he took both my hands in his before kneeling and looking up to capture my eyes with his intense green stare. I felt the breath catch in my throat as he began to speak.

"I must ask your forgiveness. Above all else, the fault is mine, Isabella. I promised not to leave your side all night. The moment I did, the wolves descend in the form of a well dressed socialite. Her words and insinuations are inexcusable and we will deal with her tomorrow. From this night forward, I need you to believe that I would wait a lifetime for you. I suppose you have beguiled me. Bewitched me. You have ruined me for all other women as I could never want another as I do you. I have placed your necessary items in this room for I wish it to be ours, together. We can place the rest of your things whenever and wherever you like, but _your _place is with me, in _our room,_ if you are agreeable. I must warn you, however, that once we enter, there is no place for that woman or any other in our room. I will not even have you speak her name. Can you leave her and any thoughts of her behind? I have already done so and do not wish to think of her again, tonight or any other."

At his declaration, I could not find my voice, but whispered the only response I could give in that moment.

"I love you, Edward."

Smiling gently, he rose and kissed me softly before responding. "I love you, My Bella. So very much."

The breath left my body in a rush in the next moment as he lifted me in his arms and walked into the bedroom we now shared. Striding confidently to a chair near the fire, he placed me down gently as he sat on the footstool in front of me. Glancing around the room, I noticed that none of the oil lamps were lit, but several of the luminaries that had lit the conservatory were placed strategically around the room to cast a soft glow. There were also petals from the red and pink roses scattered across the bed and along the floor near the fire. Feeling his hand on my knee, I turned my eyes back to Edward, sitting in front of me, holding out a crystal glass containing a bit of dark liquid. Taking the glass from him, I took small sip as he nodded in approval.

"It is port. A sort of sweet wine. It will warm you and help you relax." He reached down and pulled my right foot into his lap, removing my slipper as he did so. Lowering it, he did the same with my left, but continued to hold it as he placed his thumbs on the bottom and began to knead slowly, firmly applying pressure as he circled them from heel to toe. Repeating the action with my other foot, he continued to massage his way up my lower legs, stopping at the back of my knees. It felt glorious on my muscles, aching from hours of dancing. If I were honest, the ache I was beginning to feel elsewhere was quickly overcoming the soreness in my muscles.

"Warm enough?" I nodded once, not taking my eyes from his. Taking the empty glass from my hands, he stood, pulling me to stand as well. Cupping my jaw with his hands, his thumbs stroked gently across my cheeks as he spoke. "I will go very slowly, Bella. You must let me know if you are uncomfortable."

As he leaned closer, I closed my eyes, expecting him to kiss my lips. Instead, he began to place warm, wet kisses along the length of my jaw, down my neck and onto my collarbone. His hands moved then, one to wrap around the back of my neck, angling my head to provide his lips better access, the other to my back, pressing me against him. Slowly working his way back up, both of his hands slid into my hair as his lips found mine, his tongue teasing against my lower lip until it gained entrance to my mouth, sliding gently against my own.

I was lost in sensation as he kissed me with more gentle passion than I had ever known. My hands made their way to his chest, grasping his shirt, pulling him tightly to me. I could not bring him close enough and pressed my face into his chest as he broke the kiss to allow us both to draw breath. Lifting my face to meet his eyes, he gazed at me with dark eyes as I felt his fingers drag through my hair as it had been released from its pins and combs. Reaching the ends of the curls, his hands slid up my back, releasing the first of the buttons on my gown. Nervous and uncertain, I stiffened in his arms and his fingers immediately stopped their progression. Pressing his cheek against mine, Edward kissed the tender spot just below my ear and whispered, "Breathe, love. Relax and trust me to care for you."

His fingers resumed their work as he continued to kiss a trail along my neck and between my collarbones. It seemed only a breath of time before my gown slid down my body, billowing around my feet on the floor. Stepping back, Edward held my hands and guided me out of the mound of fabric. Once clear of it, he placed my hands on his chest, guiding my fingers to open the buttons on his shirt. After a few fumbling tries, I found a pattern and had them undone surprisingly quickly. I had not even noticed that he had used the space of time to divest me of the rest of my clothing, save my silk chemise that covered so little that it could barely be called a garment. Shrugging out of his shirt and letting it fall to the floor, he stepped forward and once again swept me up into his arms. Crossing the room, he deposited me on the bed, kissing me soundly before stepping back. I averted my eyes and shifted over on the bed just a bit as he quickly removed the rest of his clothing.

Closing my eyes, I could feel my heart pounding and my breathing become labored once again as he slid into the bed beside me, covering himself quickly. Placing his fingers against my jaw, he tugged gently, attempting to turn my head. His voice was low and soft as he spoke.

"Bella, look at me, please."

"I cannot."

"How can I help you? Are you frightened? Nervous? Please, talk to me, love."

"I am afraid I will not please you. I feel so much in this moment and I cannot think what I should do."

He chuckled a bit at my words, pulling me into his arms. "You please me simply by breathing. And in this moment, I do not want you to think, just feel. Lie back and close your eyes, sweet girl. Let me please you."

Taking a deep breath, I did as he asked, allowing him to guide me back onto the pillows. Holding my hand in his, he began to kiss and nip his way up my arm, nibbling gently, then gliding his tongue over the heated skin. Reaching my shoulder, he abandoned my arm, to kiss his way across the exposed skin of my chest, bringing his hands up to cup my breasts through the thin fabric covering them, sweeping his thumbs over my hardened nipples. Hearing my sharp intake of breath, he whispered, "Yes, love. Just feel."

He continued to caress and knead my breasts as his lips once again began their assault on my overheated, oversensitive skin. Suddenly his hands were gone and left me feeling cold and exposed. Opening my eyes, I was met with his blazing green orbs as he watched my face. Feeling a tug on my chemise, I lifted my body, knowing he wished to remove it. His eyes never left mine as they sought permission to discard the last barrier between us. Nodding my assent, I took a deep breath as he pulled it from my body. I watched as his eyes lowered, taking in the sight of my naked body. Burning with embarrassment, I turned my face from his, but he quickly caught it, pulling my lips back to his, kissing me passionately before leaning back to look intently into my eyes.

"Beautiful." One word. It took only one word to calm my fears and stir desire in me such as I had never known. Reaching up, I twined my fingers into his hair, pulling him down to my lips. Shifting to wrap his arms around me, we both groaned loudly as our bodies met unhindered for the first time. The feel of his warm skin on mine caused me to gasp for breath as his hands began to roam once again to my breasts and lower to the tender flesh of my belly, finally grasping my hips, pulling them tight against his own.

I _felt_ him then. I felt _him_! Once again, my body grew tense with nerves. Edward felt it as well, but held me more firmly as his lips continued their exploration. When he reached my breast, he circled the nipple with his tongue before claiming it with his mouth. My hands immediately grasped his shoulders as I gave a soft cry.

"Give in to it, to me, my Bella"

He used his hands, lips, teeth and tongue to awaken my body to more sensation than I had ever known possible. What his hands were not caressing, his lips were exploring, leaving me a writhing, shaking mess. Rolling me onto my back, he brought his body to lay beside me, facing me as his hand slid down my body, stopping to rest over the most intimate part of me. Desire and longing had quickly replaced my fear and nerves, and I turned my head to place a kiss on his chest. Continuing its trek down my body, his hand came to rest on the back of my knee, lifting it and draping my leg over his hip, opening me to him as he lay beside me. I began to tremble slightly at the vulnerability I felt in that moment.

As always, Edward was calm and reassuring. "Relax, Bella. Trust me to please you." With that, his warm hand cupped me and began to gently rub and press against me until I found myself pushing my hips up to meet his movements. At my response, he slid his fingers against the tender flesh, finding the most sensitive of places. Circling it with his fingers, his mouth once again claimed my breast, his tongue circling and flicking with the same pattern that I received from his hand. Moments later, he gently slid a finger into my body while never ceasing his steady movements on the rest of my body. I was struggling to breathe, rocking my hips with the rhythm he had set. Striving, reaching, pulling toward something just out of reach, I was lost in sensation as my heart was pounding in my chest. Grasping his shoulders, I pressed my head back into the pillow as I called out to him.

"Oh…Ed –Edward… what is… oh…" I could barely get enough breath to speak.

"Let it go, Bella." He sped up his movements for just a moment before my legs began to shake and my body arched upward against him. It felt as though my whole being had exploded with the most intense pleasure washing over me again and again. When my breathing had slowed, I opened my eyes to find Edward gazing down at me. He had shifted over me and now rested with his body pressed firmly against my own. He wore the most tender of expressions and smiled softly.

"I love you." He pressed his lips to mine, gently pulling and sucking at my lips before claiming my mouth entirely with his own. Once again wrapping his hand around the back of my knee, he lifted my leg and pulled it up and against his hip, lining his body up with mine. I could feel him pressing ever so slightly into me. Raising his head to meet my eyes, he held my gaze as he whispered, "Pull your other leg up, love. Take a deep breath and let it out slowly."

He watched my face closely while I did as he asked. When I let out the breath, he pushed into me, pressing forward until we were joined completely. Bringing his arms around me, he whispered his love for me as he waited for my body to accommodate him and for my discomfort to ease. In that moment, I felt complete, wholly consumed by the man I loved and overwhelmed at the emotion I felt having given myself to him entirely. Gazing up at him, I took his face in my hands, bringing my lips to meet his in a soft kiss, whispering my desire against them.

"Love me, Edward."

With a groan, he kissed me deeply as he shifted his hips and began to slowly pull away and gently push back into me. Over and over, his hips gently rocking into me as he held my body close and kissed everywhere his lips could reach. I was once again overcome with the need to bring him closer. I had taken him completely inside my body, but it was not enough. Wrapping my arms around his shoulders and my legs around his hips, I pulled him tightly to me with every thrust of his body. Feeling the same sensations as before, I pushed my hips against his, meeting his intensity, needing something more.

"Oh God… Bella…" He began to move faster, pushing harder. It was exactly what my body was craving and I knew it would quickly build to that sweet release once again.

"Edward, please…" I begged unashamedly, knowing now the pleasure he could bring. Raising his body from mine, he wrapped his arms underneath me, holding me in place as he once again quickened his pace. Crying out, I felt my body grip him intimately as I once again was wrapped in pleasure. He gasped as his movements became frantic and uncontrolled. Seconds later, warmth spread through me as he called out my name before collapsing onto me. My arms and legs were still wrapped around him, cradling his body and welcoming his weight.

After catching his breath, he lifted his face from where it had been nestled in my neck and kissed me gently as he tried to remove himself from my body.

"Please do not move. I cannot bear to lose the connection. Please." My plea was but a shaky whisper. He met my eyes as he spoke.

"I do not wish to crush you."

"You do not crush me. I welcome the weight. It proves to me that you are real, that this is real."

He smiled indulgently at me as he brushed the damp hair from my face. "It is real, my love. It is real and forever. I love you, Bella."

"I love you, husband." Smiling at my words, Edward rolled our bodies to the side causing our bodies to seperate. Keeping me snugly wrapped in his arms, he tucked my head under his chin as his fingers stroked lightly up and down my back.

"Sleep, my Bella. Rest easy in my arms for they will not let you go."

I drifted off in his warm embrace, secure in his love for only me.


	21. A Witch and an Outing

**Don't own it. Edward owns me, though.**

**As always, thank you so much for your support of this story. I am always stunned at the kind words and encouragement you send my way. I will admit that I have been very guilty of reading so many stories and not reviewing. However, now that I know how precious they are, I try to review everything I read. My sincerest thanks to those of you who let me know what you think of this little tale.**

EPOV

"Bella, are you awake?" I brushed the hair from her face and let my fingers trace the curve of her neck as she began to slowly stir. I had awakened early and lay for some time watching her sleep in my arms. It was only when it became painfully necessary to rise and see to my morning needs that I left her resting comfortably in our bed. After dressing for the day and retrieving a tray from the kitchen, I returned to find her still sleeping and was hesitant to wake her, knowing I had exhausted her last night.

My memories of last night were overwhelming. The unguarded trust she had placed in me to care for her, the responsiveness of her body to my touch, and the manner in which she offered herself to me fully had given me the single greatest night of my existence. Knowing she was exhausted and would be uncomfortable so soon was the only thing that kept me from claiming her repeatedly in the night.

"Edward?" Her quiet voice roused me from my thoughts. She rolled to face me as I sat beside her on the bed. I reached for her hand, bringing it to my lips as she looked up at me.

"Good morning. I would inquire as to your rest, however, I know for a fact that you rested well, my love."

She blushed beautifully as she looked away. "I did rest well. Thank you."

I could not help but laugh at her shyness. "It is I who should thank you, sweet wife. Come, I have some breakfast."

She sat up as I held her robe out to her. It did not escape my notice that she flinched and winced as she moved.

"Are you well, Bella?"

She immediately burned bright red once again and her eyes grew large and round as she looked away quickly.

"Bella?"

She gave me a small smile before speaking quietly. "I am well, just a bit… um… sore."

Realization dawned, and truth be told, I was proud to have marked her that way. I could not voice that to her, but felt it none the less. Grinning at her, I responded in the only way I could, arrogant as it was.

"While I regret your discomfort, love, I must admit that I do not regret the cause of it. I will own to hoping for a quick recovery so that we may support that cause avidly."

"Edward!" She pushed at my shoulder, rising from the bed while gaping at me.

Laughing heartily at her shocked expression, I wrapped her in my arms and cocked a brow at her when she met my eyes.

"Speak the truth, Isabella, your hopes are the same, are they not?"

She giggled as she reached up on the tips of her toes to kiss me. It was a playful, sweet kiss and I could not help but marvel at her lighthearted mood. I could not help but believe that the woman I held this morning was the woman she would have always been had her circumstances not changed the course of her life. Guiding her over to the table that had been placed near the hearth, I held her chair as she was seated before taking the seat across from her.

"What have you planned for the day?"

"I would very much like to see my father. It has been several days." I could sense her nervousness as she waited for my response. Reaching across the table, I took her hand in mine, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"I believe he would be glad to have your company. Would you like me to accompany you or would you prefer to go alone?"

"I am uncertain." She was quiet for a moment as she contemplated her options. Finally meeting my gaze, she smiled hesitantly. "Would it be troublesome for you to accompany me in the carriage and then determine whether you should enter the house once we arrive?"

"Not at all. I would very much like to be with you today. I do have a few matters I need to attend to, but I would be happy to accompany you this afternoon."

The remainder of our breakfast was filled with conversation, longing gazes and laughter. There was a joy in my Bella I had not seen before and could not help but marvel at the difference made in her by a sense of security. I silently vowed to be unfailing in my efforts to provide a secure and safe life for her. It would be well worth the effort for the joy it would bring her.

With breakfast behind us, I left Bella in the care of Jane who had come to draw a bath for her. I was certain Alice had something to do with this, and was grateful that Bella had a woman to look out for needs that I would be unaware of. I had not thought of the discomfort she might experience as a result of our lovemaking and resolved that perhaps Jasper or my father could give me some guidance regarding the care and nurture of my wife.

Making my way downstairs, I found Jasper in the study pacing as he perused an accounts log. I recognized it immediately as the log for estate accounts and knew instinctively that he had uncovered information regarding the estate's financial history.

"What have you found?"

He stopped pacing and quickly looked up as I entered the room. Turning several pages, obviously looking for something particular, he walked to the desk and placed the log down beside another stack of papers. Ruffling through the sheets until he found the one he was searching for, he placed it alongside the log and motioned me over.

"Look at this, Edward. The statements from the depository show amounts matching exactly to the signature of one James Smith."

Not understanding the significance, I shook my head as I compared the numbers.

"This shows only that he made large deposits into his personal account. What has that to do with the estate?"

Pulling another log from beneath the stack already visible, he pointed to the page.

"And would you find these numbers any more interesting?"

Once again comparing the numbers, the truth was glaringly obvious. The amounts made to the depository were the exact amounts signed to Mr. Smith by Mr. Swan for household and estate expenses. The entire story was contained in the handwritten ledgers laid before me. Mr. Swan had signed over the funds to Mr. Smith with the intent that they be used to provide for the estate. Mr. Smith had simply deposited the funds in his personal account. No one had bothered to seek out the ledger for Mr. Smith's account until now, and the evidence was undeniable. The only piece to the puzzle was finding Mr. Smith and holding him accountable for his theft.

"Have you come to this information through legal means?"

"Of course. It was only a matter of asking the proper authorities. Having a legal practice certainly does nothing to hinder my progress either."

Jasper was an exceptional attorney. He had an innate ability to read people which seemed to allow him the advantage in most situations. I trusted his judgment entirely.

"Jasper, have you revealed this to anyone else?" At his denial, I continued. "I am uncertain as to whether I should tell Isabella. I do not want to raise her hopes, but I do not wish to deceive her either. Perhaps we should alert the authorities and proceed at their recommendation."

"I have requested an audience with the constable. I would prefer you leave this to me as your counsel. I will handle the more unseemly details and secure your wife's fortune. You can simply step in at the last moment and provide her with a knight in armor to save the day."

We were laughing by the end of his speech. I did understand his meaning, however. I would be able to keep my name and reputation from anything concerning Mr. Smith and once located, the Swan name and fortune would be restored. It took us only a few more minutes to finalize details for his meeting with the constable. I gave him free reign to do whatever necessary to find Mr. Smith and took my leave of him, heading for the sitting room. There were two women I desperately needed to confront and I hoped to find them quickly.

As I rounded the corner, I could hear shouting and immediately recognized one of the voices to be Rosalie's. Upon entering the room, I found Tanya and Rosalie standing face to face, obviously furious with one another, surrounded by my mother, Alice, Garrett and Kate. Stepping inside, I closed the door behind me, and looked to my mother for an explanation. She immediately moved to my side and began to make inquiries.

"Edward, tell me honestly, had you ever met Garrett before last night?"

"No. We did have a brief exchange through correspondence to arrange a meeting after Christmas. It was set to discuss some business matters regarding Uncle Robert's estate. We had never met face to face before last evening. What has that to do with the shouting?"

Upon hearing my answer, Rosalie turned her furious glare on Tanya. "You lied to me! I spoke for you, recommended you to this family and you have lied to me!"

Looking to my mother, I asked, "What has happened? What has it to do with my correspondence with Garrett?"

Alice stepped around the angry women to where we were standing and offered the full story.

"It seems that Tanya was dishonest with Rosalie regarding the nature of your relationship. She led Rosalie to believe that there was an understanding between the two of you and that you had, in fact, contacted her father with the intention of betrothal. She played herself to be the wronged party at the announcement of your marriage to Isabella. Rosalie has discovered the truth this morning while visiting with Kate and is understandably offended at her cousin's unseemly behavior."

Turning my attention to Garrett and Kate, I felt it necessary to assure them of my innocence regarding their daughter.

"Garrett, Kate, I can only imagine what you must be thinking if you truly believed there to be an understanding between myself and your daughter. There is nothing I can offer in my defense except the truth. I have never had any intention of courtship or marriage where Tanya is concerned. It surely has no reflection on her, but rather my unwillingness until very recently to settle down. You must know that I – "

"Edward." Kate's soft voice stopped my ramblings. "We have had no illusions concerning our daughter for quite some time now. She desires an advantageous marriage and for that there can be no fault. The fault lies in her endeavors. She has claimed an untruth where you are concerned and for that we are very sorry."

Hearing her mother's words, Tanya focused on me. "Edward, how is it that you fail to see the life we could have. I know you feel something for me."

"I am married, Tanya, and I love my wife."

Her next words shocked me. In truth, I believe they shocked every person in the room.

"I have no issue with you keeping her. We can be discreet, Edward. You can keep me in the manner to which I am accustomed and I will keep you satisfied."

Even more shocking was the small, yet clearly confident voice that answered her.

"I am the only one who will provide his satisfaction. I share his name, I share his life, I share his bed, and I alone hold his affection. However, I no longer wish to share my house with you. You will collect your things and leave my home immediately."

Turning to face her, I was stunned at the brave young woman I beheld. She was stunning in her indignation and it required every bit of my restraint at that moment to keep from kissing her senseless in the presence of our guests.

Tanya turned her disbelieving eyes on me. "Edward?"

Standing resolutely beside my Bella, I wrapped my arm around her waist and met Tanya's glare, raising my brow in challenge. "I believe my wife has asked you to leave."

With a piercing shriek, Tanya turned and left the room, slamming the door behind her. Immediately, Bella's knees collapsed under her as she leaned heavily against my chest. Grateful that I already had a hand on her, I lifted her and gently moved her to a nearby chair. Once she was seated, I knelt in front of her, holding my hands in hers as she began to tremble. Alice quickly brought a glass of water which I placed in Bella's hand, holding it steady until she began to calm herself. When her eyes finally met mine, they were shining with unshed tears.

"Please do not be angry, Edward. I could not hear her speak such vile things. What she suggests… I cannot… I –"

Holding her gaze, I spoke quietly to reassure her. "I am in awe of your courage, Bella. If you had not entered the room, I would have demanded her departure as well. I am filled with pride at your determination and protection of our marriage. Thank you, love."

She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and buried her face in my shoulder. Placing my lips at her ear, I whispered words that I intended only my wife to hear. "Truly, Bella, your passionate declarations have filled me with much more than merely pride and awe, and I will be only too happy to show my gratitude when we are alone."

Raising her eyes to mine, she sought for sincerity in my gaze and found it easily, grinning and then finally allowing a giggle to escape. At the sound of it, there was a collective sigh of relief in the room. Standing and turning my attention to Garrett and Kate, I took a deep breath and tried to control the damage done by their wanton daughter.

"Garrett, I can only imagine what you must be feeling. I will not speak of this incident as I would not have your name tarnished regardless of the scandal Tanya has brought to this house."

Garrett held tightly to his wife's hand as he spoke. "Edward, I am truly sorry for the behavior of my daughter. In truth, she has been fixated on you for some time now. I had hoped that the announcement of your marriage would dispel some of her fervor. I regret that she has so disrupted the nerves of your dear wife."

I opened my mouth to speak, but Bella spoke before I had opportunity.

"Mr. and Mrs. Denali, you are always welcome in our home as you have clearly demonstrated the honor of your character. I regret I cannot extend the same courtesy to your daughter. My attachment to my husband is too dear to allow her any opportunity."

The moments that followed were full of kindly spoken words and assurances of friendship. It seemed that my Bella had easily won over the hearts of our family friends. Through all of it, however, Rosalie stood silent near the hearth. Needing to determine her involvement, I made my way to her.

"I would hope that you had nothing to do with Tanya's deception."

Her eyes snapped to mine immediately. "Edward, you know I would never take part in any scheme that would affect my daughter's future. Please, you must believe that I was informed that you intended to marry her. She declared to me her love for you and assured me that you had contacted her father to make an arrangement and eventual betrothal." Turning her eyes to the fire, she continued in a whisper, "I am ashamed to have trusted her, only to come to the truth and find she was entirely false. Please, forgive me."

"You have not wronged me, Rose. And it is not my forgiveness you need to seek."

Catching Bella's attention, I smiled at her, chuckling at the quick blush that adorned her face. Walking over and taking her hand in mine, I pulled her to me, kissing her cheek.

"Are you ready to depart? The carriage is waiting to deliver us to your father."

"Of course. Let me gather my shawl." She turned to take her leave.

I frowned at her words, grasping her hand tightly, stopping her departure. "Have you no cloak? It seems to grow colder by the day and a shawl will not provide you with enough warmth."

Her cheeks reddened in embarrassment as she looked away and spoke quietly. "I do not."

"Then we shall remedy that today. Gather your shawl and I will await your return."

She smiled widely and pushed herself up on her toes to kiss me on the cheek before turning to quickly leave the room. Shaking my head, I could not help but chuckle at her enthusiasm and wondered if each day would bring new joys with my Bella. Already I had witnessed a playful lover, a fierce protector, a compassionate hostess, and who knew what revelations the remainder of the day would hold.

* * * A H R * * *

"Were I to make an inquiry, would you answer me honestly, Isabella?"

Her eyes were wide and she seemed startled by my words. "Of course I would. I have never spoken an untruth to you, Edward. I will admit to withholding information out of fear or doubt, but I have never given you an outright lie."

Moving to sit beside her in the carriage, I took her hand in mine and smiled gently. "I did not mean to imply you would lie. I only wished to convey that I did not want the question considered lightly."

Nodding in understanding, she kept her eyes on mine as she waited for me to speak.

"Are you truly happy, Bella?"

"Yes, of course I am." She was obviously perplexed as to my line of questioning. But as I had watched her fidget with her clothing and bite her lip nervously for the past several minutes, I knew her worries concerning appearing publicly for the first time as a married woman had gotten the better of her. I simply wanted to find a way to put her at ease.

"Then tell me, why are you concerned with the opinion of others? If you are truly content as my wife, and I am beyond thrilled to be your husband, what matter is it to us what the good people of our town think?"

"It is not the _good _people that worry me, husband."

"Do you fear that I will love you any less?"

"No."

"Will you love me any less?"

"Never!"

"Then let us not worry on it any longer." Placing my hands on her cheeks and pulling her to me, I kissed her soundly while brushing my thumbs along her jaw and tilting her head to deepen the kiss. If it were up to me, we would turn the carriage and return home to the privacy of our bedchamber, but, alas, we were already arriving on the outskirts of town. Not wishing to cause her discomfort, I reluctantly pulled away and met her eyes as my hands cradled her face. "I love you, my Bella. Never doubt that and never let anyone convince you otherwise."

"I love you, my Edward." She was smiling and seemed more at ease as the carriage door opened and I stepped out and reached back to offer my hand. After a moment, she took a deep breath, placed her hand in mine and allowed me to assist her from the cab.

Once her feet were firmly on the ground, I draped her hand in the crook of my arm and turned us toward the dressmakers shop. I knew Mrs. Cope had ordered several dresses for Bella and that most of them were ready, but I was glad for the opportunity to be certain that they met Bella's approval before having them delivered. I also intended to purchase cloaks, shoes, and whatever else she would allow me to provide for her.

An hour later, we are walking out of the dress shop, handing packages to Eric to load into the carriage. Bella was now wearing a dark blue wool cloak that caused her skin to glow. She was lovely. I would have paraded her all over town, but I knew she was nervous and anxious to see her father. We had one final stop to make before heading for the cottage.

"Miss Swan! Oh, pardon me. Mrs. Cullen, lovely of you to stop in." Mr. Banner was thrilled to see her. He leaned in and kissed her cheek, smiling proudly at her the entire time. "Have you come to brighten an old man's day, or is there something I can get for you?"

"Thank you, Mr. Banner. I have actually come for both. I am so very glad to see you." Her voice quieted as she continued. "I wished to thank you for holding my possessions. It was overwhelming to know you had kept them in the hopes of returning them to me."

"Your husband was quite adamant in returning your things to their rightful owner. His persistence has paid off, I see. You look happy, dear girl. That is the only thanks I need."

Bella lifted up and kissed him sweetly on the cheek and then promptly wiped at her eyes. I held out my handkerchief to her and smiled as she met my gaze. The worries of this morning were gone and she seemed confident and happy. It was to be short-lived however, as we encountered Mrs. Mallory only moments later. Bella had followed Mr. Banner to the far side of the store to find a new book for her father while I perused a selection of gloves in the hopes of finding some to match her cloak. I did not hear the door to the shop open to allow that hateful woman to enter. The first indication I had that something was terribly wrong was the sound of Mr. Banner's voice as he shouted from the back of the store.

"You are a vile woman, Caroline Mallory, and your money is of no value in this store without an apology to Mrs. Cullen."

"An apology? She has the audacity to make a claim on Mr. Cullen and good society is to sit by as he is taken at advantage for his wealth. Surely she has forced him into a compromising position. He would never have wed her otherwise!"

As I stepped into her line of sight, her shocked expression told me she had no knowledge of my presence in the shop. Offering my hand, I waited for her to place hers in mine. Once she had, I quickly grasped it and gave a gentlemanly bow before raising my eyes to hers. "I have not had the pleasure, Mrs. Mallory. Edward Cullen."

She stood speechless for a moment and I took the opportunity to glance at my Bella. She stood frozen beside Mr. Banner, waiting for the confrontation to play out before her. Turning my attention back to Mrs. Mallory, I spoke confidently, defending my wife delicately.

"Mrs. Mallory, it would appear that news of our marriage has traveled quickly. I believe I can put to rest any concerns you might have regarding the way our marriage occurred. I will gladly admit that I loved Isabella from the day I met her. We married that very day. I begged her unashamedly for our marriage and have not regretted a moment of it since. I look forward to getting to know her acquaintances as I know you have all loved her much longer than I. For now, I must bid you good afternoon as Mrs. Cullen and I have another visit to make before the evening meal."

Offering my hand to Bella, I pulled her to my side immediately and turned her toward Mr. Banner. "Sir, I have chosen a few items that I wish to purchase for my wife as well as those she has chosen for her father. We are prepared to settle our account at your leisure."

He was quick to handle our purchases and I walked Bella back to the carriage at a gentle stroll. Once inside the carriage, she quickly turned her inquisitive gaze on me. I addressed her questions before she could voice them.

"I spoke no untruths. I have already told you that I knew I loved you the night I brought you to Collingsworth. And I did beg you for our marriage. It was decidedly after we were married, but I did beg you for it to remain." Watching her carefully for any sign of upset, she took me by surprise a moment later when she grasped my face in her hands and kissed me with no small amount of passion. Her lips were insistent against mine, pressing forward until her tongue found entrance to my mouth and tangled with my own. She had nearly climbed into my lap and was pressing her body tightly against my own when I felt the warmth of her tears on my cheek. Pulling away from her just enough to observe her face, I was overwhelmed with the emotion I found there.

"You have completely disarmed the gossips with a few words. How is it that you always know what to do or say? I am either reduced to tears or wish to strike in anger, but you always know how to manage a situation. And I cannot begin to understand how, in doing so, you cause something inside of me to burn so that I feel out of control of my own body!" Her next words were whispered as though she would be mortified should someone hear them. "Is it shameful to feel desire in the daylight when there are others near? I cannot help myself, husband. What have you done to me?"

I could not contain my laughter at her wide-eyed innocence. "I certainly hope not, wife, for I burn for you as well. And as for what I have done to you, well, it is nothing compared to what I plan to do to you very soon."


	22. A Visit and Bliss

**Wish I owned it. I will own to the fact that while I loved RPatz hair, I do find his new cut unbelievably sexy. Hmmm…. Maybe I can talk the hubs into it….yeah, probably not.**

**So…. You guys are coming out of the woodwork to read this and I could not be more thrilled. I have tried to reply to those of you who are new. I will admit that I have been terrible about it, but I read every single one and practically jump up and down with excitement each time my phone chimes letting me know that someone else has been kind enough to let me know what they think. Anyway, I figured you would rather have this chapter than a few words in response, so consider this my thank you for now.**

BPOV

The carriage ride to the cottage was filled with whispered words of adoration and sweet kisses. Far from the prying eyes of the townspeople that had kept us under scrutiny for the last couple of hours, we were able to relax and enjoy a few moments entirely to ourselves. The manner in which Edward handled Mrs. Mallory was an incredible thing to behold. Perhaps it was just my previous acquaintance with her that caused my worry, but he had no qualms regarding our place in society. I hoped it would continue to be as comfortable as this day had been. I could only hope that after a few trips into town with him, our marriage would be accepted and we would no longer be the topic of gossip.

"Bella?" Edward gently pulled my face back to his and gazed at me with a look of no small concern. "Clearly your mind is elsewhere. Where have you gone?"

Smiling at his worry, I took his hand in mine and brought it to my lips, placing a quick kiss to his palm. "I was thinking about how fortunate and happy I am. I feel as if my entire future has opened in front of my eyes. Just weeks ago, I worried that we would not survive the next winter, and yet now I, well, I feel buoyant. There is no weight bearing down on me constantly as there was before."

His answering smile was wide and I could not help by feel the joy in it as he held my gaze. "It is my constant endeavor that you never again know worry, doubt, hunger, or fear." While he was speaking, we arrived and stopped in front of the cottage. After stepping out of the carriage, Edward offered his hand to assist me from the carriage. Taking his hand, I emerged and took in my surroundings. I had not been here since the day my father had not recognized me and I had no idea what today held in store. Taking a deep breath, I felt Edward's warm hand as it clasped mine, bringing me close to him.

"I will wait here for you. If you find you need me, do not hesitate, Bella." His gaze was intense and I could not help but feel the intensity of his concern. The last time he had visited this cottage, my father had been outraged at his arrival and Edward had felt I was in danger. I knew my father would never intentionally harm me, but I could certainly understand Edward's concern.

Giving his hand a gentle squeeze, I smiled up at him. "Let us hope for the best." Turning toward the door, I released his hand and stepped forward. For a moment, I hesitated, not knowing whether I should knock or just enter as I always had. If he had no memory of me any longer, I did not wish to startle him. Taking a deep breath, I squared my shoulders and intended to walk through the door. I did not have the opportunity as my father opened the door and stepped out into the sunlight.

"Can I help you, miss?" There was no recognition in his eyes. The stab of pain I felt was sharp, but I quickly pressed it down, realizing that any chance I had at continuing a relationship with him would come as a new acquaintance at every meeting.

"Mr. Swan, my husband and I were passing by your home and wished to stop and make your acquaintance. We have lived in the area for a bit and we were hoping to get to know our neighbors. I am Bella Cullen and this is my husband, Edward Cullen." I waited with no small amount of trepidation as to his response. I watched as he glanced between Edward and me, hoping he would be receptive to our visit. Finally, he took a step toward Edward and offered his hand.

"Mr. Cullen. I am glad to make your acquaintance. Have you had your afternoon tea?"

Edward smiled a wide smile at my father and pulled me close as he answered.

"We have not, sir. We have come from town and have not had an opportunity for refreshment."

"Well, come then. I will have my housekeeper prepare some and we can enjoy it over our visit."

Following my father into the cottage, I felt at once relieved and saddened at the strange circumstances in which I now found myself. Relieved that in my absence, Edward had made certain my father was still being cared for and saddened that in those few weeks his health had taken such a drastic turn. The only comfort in all of it was knowing that even with the loss of my father's recognition, I was no longer alone. The warmth of Edward's hand in my own was a physical reassurance that he held me always – my hand, my heart, my future. I only wished my father knew of my happiness.

Being seated in the small living space of the room, we were served tea by the young woman that Edward had made certain was hired to provide care for Papa. I learned her name was Jessica and she was kind and seemed to have a pleasant disposition. I did notice a short, whispered conversation between Jessica and Edward and her following saddened smiles at me. There was no question he had informed her of our identities and relationship to man she was taking care of.

The afternoon was spent in pleasant conversation and laughter. Edward was seeing my father for the first time as the man I knew him to be. He was entertaining, kind, generous and fair. Until this day, there had been no opportunity for my husband to know Papa for the person he truly was. I was very careful to only discuss things that would not cause confusion for him. It was difficult in the beginning, but as he asked Edward about his business dealings and hobbies, I found the conversation flowed easily. I also learned a great many things about my husband that I had not previously known. He enjoyed reading, travel, horseback riding and the hunt. He knew a great deal regarding crop rotation and estate management, and loved music. I could not hide my surprise when I learned that he played the pianoforte. I knew there was one at Collingsworth and wondered if he had taken the opportunity to play it.

All too soon it was time to take our leave. I had enjoyed our visit very much and had not even noticed how late it had become. After assisting me into the carriage, Edward shook my father's hand once more and assured him we would visit again soon. Of course, I knew the likelihood that Papa would even remember us was slim. Climbing in beside me, he tapped on the side of the carriage with his open hand to signal to Eric we were ready. As the carriage pulled away from the cottage, I could feel his eyes on me. Not ready yet to discuss it, I turned my face toward the window and watched the scenery pass as we traveled in silence. After a moment, I felt Edward gently lift my hand to his lips, kiss it softly and then hold it firmly between his own. Unable to resist the comfort he offered, I turned to him, wrapping my arms around his waist and burying my face in his neck. He pulled me close and held me tightly to him, neither of us speaking for the remainder of the trip.

EPOV

I could not read her thoughts. It was certain that she was a bit melancholy regarding our visit with Mr. Swan, but I had no idea if she was merely saddened or if she were on the verge of devastation. In that moment, I simply held her close, offering her comfort and warmth and hoping she knew how I desperately wanted to take away her pain. There were no words spoken between us as we traveled and she did not meet my eyes as I assisted her from the carriage when we arrived at Collingsworth. She kept her hold on my hand until we entered the house, squeezing gently and releasing it when I stopped to speak with Tyler.

"Good evening, sir. Your family recently finished their evening meal and are mostly convened in the sitting room. Your father and Mr. Whitlock are in the study. Would you care for supper?"

"Yes, thank you. We will take our supper in the library near the fire."

"Sir, I should also inform you that Miss Denali has vacated Collingsworth as have her parents. They wished to convey their appreciation for your hospitality."

"Very well. Would you inform my family that Mrs. Cullen and I are in residence and that we will enjoy their company at breakfast?"

At his nod of acknowledgment, I took my leave of him, heading toward the library. I knew I would find her there. It was a place of solace and comfort to her and one of her favorite places at Collingsworth, second only to the conservatory. Opening the door and entering the room, I immediately saw her staring out the windows at the grounds below. Hearing me enter, she began to speak, never turning her gaze from whatever held her attention outside.

"I am not heartbroken, only a bit sad."

"That is certainly understandable."

"I am glad we went to see him. The man you met today is the father I have known my entire life. He is kind and good, fair, gentle, and genuinely enjoys the world around him. That is the man I wanted you to know."

"It was an honor to meet him, Bella. He seems a truly good man." I walked over to stand beside her, but with enough distance from her to allow whatever space she needed.

"I believe he is letting go."

"How do you mean?"

Taking a deep breath, she quickly wiped away an escaped tear. I fought against the need to pull her close and absorb her pain. She needed the space. She needed to speak her thoughts and process what she was feeling.

"While I was still with him, he never forgot even the smallest detail about me or our time together. Now that I am no longer there, he has almost immediately lost all memory of me. I believe on some level, his mind has allowed him to let me go now that he knows I am well cared for. He has no need to worry about me any longer and his mind has locked that part away. I fear that it will happen quickly and I will not be ready to say goodbye."

The last was spoken in a whisper and I could bear it no longer. Reaching out, I pulled her into my arms and held her close. I heard the door open and the sounds of Tyler setting out our meal, but we did not move from our embrace. I was at a loss as to how to bring her comfort. I had never lost a parent and she was on the verge of losing the only one she had remaining. How she had not come apart already was beyond me. Suddenly she pulled away, leaning back to look up at me.

"I take great comfort in the fact that it will not be a difficult parting for him. He has no memory of those he loves and while it is sad, it will leave him with no regrets in this life – at least none he can remember."

I could not help but smile at her reasoning. "You are truly an amazing woman. How you can see the good in every situation is beyond my ability to comprehend."

She smiled in return, pressing up to kiss the tip of my nose. "You must be hungry. Come, our meal is getting cold."

Following her to the table, I held her chair as she was seated and then took my own across from her. It was reminiscent of our first evening together and I was reminded of just how much our relationship had progressed in the few weeks since that time. Reaching across the table, I took her hand in mine, needing the physical contact. Our fingers stayed intertwined through the rest of the meal. Once we had finished, I drew her up from her chair and brought her into my arms, pressing my lips softly to hers. It was only a moment before need and desire overtook us both. Hands roaming, tongues tangling, labored breaths and soft moans all spurring us on toward an obvious end. Pulling away from her kiss-swollen lips, I caught her gaze, intending to suggest removing ourselves to our bedroom. However, one glimpse of her wild, desire darkened eyes and the words caught in my throat.

Crashing my lips back to hers, I lifted her and placed her on the front edge of the table while simultaneously pushing everything else off the back edge. Hearing her gasp at the sound of our dining implements crashing to the floor, I continued to press my lips to her neck until she relaxed in my arms. Slowly working my way up the column of her neck until I reached her ear, I made my intention known.

"May I have you here, love? Right here. Right now." Sucking the tender lobe of her ear into my mouth before gently biting, I knew she would not deny me as her arms pulled me closer while her knees parted allowing my body to press in fully to hers. Sliding my hand down her leg, I brought it under he skirt and slid it back up, grasping the back of her knee and pulling it tight against my hip. I ceased all movement when I felt her small hand grasping at the front of my pants. Looking up at me with questioning eyes, she stilled her hands, waiting for my response. Placing my hand over hers, I began moving our fingers together to open the placket. Once she had it open, I dropped my hands to her waist and watched as she pulled my shirt from it's confines at my waist. She continued until everything was loose and she had unfettered access to the most intimate parts of my body. Once again meeting my eyes, she held my gaze as her hand carefully wrapped around me.

My knees nearly buckled at the feel of her warm little fingers. Dropping my head to her shoulder, my hands once again began their trek up her long legs, bringing her skirts up with them. Reaching their destination, I smiled at Bella's sharp intake of breath and as her hands tightened my breath stuttered as well.

"Careful, sweetheart, we will need that." I felt her skin heat up in what I was certain was a beautiful blush. When she loosened her grip, I immediately felt the loss. "I wanted you careful, not removed. Do not be afraid to touch me, my body belongs to you, Bella. Do as you will with it."

The moan that escaped her mouth as a result of my words was nearly my undoing. I needed to claim her again, desperate for the connection. My uncertainty as the her readiness was answered in her body's response to me. She reached up, grasping my hair and pulling me down, her mouth devouring my own in a deep, passionate kiss. As I pushed her skirts up around her hips and loosened her undergarments, her mouth continued to consume every inch of skin as she placed hot, wet, open mouthed kisses on my chin, jaw and neck. Aligning our bodies and pulling her hips against me, I needed her to know just how desperate I had become.

"Bella, I cannot….ah…this will… not be long." I could hardly gasp out the words as she began pressing forward, bringing me into her body ever so slightly.

"Edward! Oh… oh, god." Her head fell back as I pressed forward, filling her completely. Bringing her legs up and locking them around my waist, our bodies were pressed together, unmoving for a moment as we both struggled to breathe. Bringing her hands up and bracing them on my shoulders while pressing her heels into my backside, she urged me with her body to move. "Please, Edward…"

Wrapping one arm hand around her neck and anchoring her hip with the other, I began rocking into her with a sure, steady rhythm. Feeling her push back, meeting me at every thrust was more than I could bear. This would be quick and powerful. Picking up my pace, her breathing quickened and I knew she felt it as well. Moments later, her head dropped back and she began to tighten around me, drawing out a pleasure from my body unlike any I had ever known. Her soft cries and her fingers digging into the flesh of my shoulders confirmed to me that she had been consumed by it as well.

Leaning my weight against the table, I held her firmly against me as she slowed her breathing and her body ceased its shaking. My own body was spent, but I could not bring myself to break the connection. I had no knowledge of how long we remained in each others arms, but a sudden knock on the door caused my sweet Bella to jump in alarm.

"Edward! Someone will see!"

Though I knew she was startled, I could not help but laugh at her statement. "I think it is a bit late for that consideration, my love."

I had no care if someone should walk in as I had no shame in the fact that I had loved my wife so thoroughly and her dress and hair was askew to prove it so. She was beautiful – her lips swollen from my kisses, her cheeks and neck red from the scratch of a day's growth of facial hair, her hair falling from its soft twist where my hands had grasped it –she was utterly beautiful.

I did have a care, however, for her comfort, and I knew she would be uncomfortable for anyone to see her. Lifting her down from the table, I pulled her behind me to the door. She situated herself so as not to be seen while I opened the door to find Tyler on the other side.

"I came to clear away the remains of the meal, sir."

"Thank you, Tyler. I will let you know when Mrs. Cullen and I are finished with the room so that you may take care of it." Closing the door, I gave him no room to see my Bella or to ask what had taken so long to consume our supper. Turning back to my red-faced wife, I reached for her hand and pulled her to me, kissing her lips briefly before whispering in her ear, "Let us continue our evening upstairs, away from anyone who might overhear our activities, love."

* * * A H R * * * 

The next few days were filled with enjoyable activities involving the entire family. Bella had so thoroughly endeared herself to my family that I found myself fighting for moments to spend with her in the daylight hours. My mother and sister had quickly pulled her into whatever needlework project they were investing themselves in currently, and Jasper would often seek out her opinion on whatever social or political matters were the topic of the day. She had a quick mind and would often bring to bear some reasoning he had not considered, making him that much more contemplative and inquisitive. My father was even fascinated by her love of books and knowledge and the two of them would lose themselves in discussions of literature for hours. Had I chosen her myself as a wife, I could not have found a better match for the family as a whole.

Rosalie had still not spoken a single word to Isabella since the evening of the Ball. I had come to realize that she would not offer an apology to Bella except at the demand of her husband. I also knew that it would hold no meaning, but that did not alter my decision. She would seek Bella's forgiveness or be put out of the house in two days time. Emmett and I were in agreement that regardless of her feelings toward my wife, this was still our home and she would respect my Bella as the lady of the house.

Emma was an altogether different story. Her Aunt Isabella could do no wrong in her sight and was her constant shadow. Every spare moment was spent listening to stories, exploring the grounds and gardens, studiously observing needlework, or anything else that my sweet wife put her hand to. It was a mutual adoration, as Bella sought to include the child in her day at every turn.

Our nights were filled with passion and desire as were most mornings and many stolen moments during the day. We were entertainment for my family as they knew exactly what we were up to and had many a laugh at our expense. After our initial encounter in the library, I learned quickly that my wife was much more responsive if I locked the door. I had never known happiness as I had in her arms and found it difficult to part from her even for a few hours. In truth, had my family not been in residence, I would have taken her to our bedchamber and kept her there for days. As it was, the were staying another week for Christmas, making Bella and I a little more creative in finding a stolen moment as well as a door with a lock.

It was in this state of marital bliss that I found myself arriving at Collingsworth on Thursday afternoon after having been in town with Jasper to sign paperwork that would bring formal charges against James Smith. Climbing out of the carriage, Jasper turned his face upward, carefully watching the sky.

"I believe we are in for our first winter storm of the season, Edward. What are your thoughts?"

I had kept an eye on the skies for the last few hours, noting the changes and I found myself agreeing with Jasper's assessment. "I think you are correct, my friend. It would appear we will be forced to find a way to keep our women warm."

Jasper barked out a laugh and shook his head while ascending the stairs to the door. He did not get the opportunity to place a foot inside before Alice was running into his arms, worry and fear etched on her face.

"Jasper, we cannot locate Emma! We have searched the house and the gardens and she is nowhere to be found!"

Clearly distraught, she collapsed to tears as his arms enveloped her. Turning to escort her into the house, he glanced back at me, his concern evident on his face. I quickly found Tyler to inquire as to the details of my niece's disappearance. Apparently Emma had wanted to explore the gardens and finding no one to escort her, she had gone alone. When she had been missing at the mid-day meal, the search began. It was now half past three and she had yet to be located.

After having obtained the necessary information from Tyler, I turned to find my Bella and the rest of the family. After a brief hesitation, Tyler called out to stop my retreat.

"Sir, I have further information." Sensing his trepidation, I met his eyes and waited for him to continue.

"When Mrs. Cullen learned of the child's absence, she left in search of her. She left no indication as to the direction of her search and I fear for her safety and well-being as the temperature is rapidly dropping and there are few hours of daylight left."


	23. Fear and Cold

**I own nothing, sadly.**

**I am speechless. I am overwhelmed by your kind words and encouragement. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I love to know what you are thinking and am often surprised at your assumptions and sometimes even find myself thinking "Why didn't I think of that?" Thank you for sharing your response to this story. **

**Okay, on with it…**

"_Sir, I have further information." Sensing his trepidation, I met his eyes and waited for him to continue._

"_When Mrs. Cullen learned of the child's absence, she left in search of her. She left no indication as to the direction of her search and I fear for her safety and well-being as the temperature is rapidly dropping and there are few hours of daylight left."_

EPOV

Mrs. Cullen. There were three Mrs. Cullens currently in residence at Collingsworth. My head recognized Tyler's meaning. Had he meant my mother or Rosalie, he would have referred to them by their relationship to me as well as their name. My heart begged to differ. He could not mean my Bella was exposed in troublesome weather. Fear gripped me the likes of which I had never known. Closing my eyes against the image of my sweet wife wandering the woods, cold and alone.

"Isabella." It was not a question, but a confirmation of his words.

"Yes, sir. Your father and brother have already set out in search of Mrs. Cullen and the child. The ladies are gathered in the sitting room nearest the conservatory. What are your instructions, sir?"

"The staff has been gathered and questioned in regards to their departures?" At his nod, I continued, "Who was the last to have seen them?"

"Mrs. Cope remembers the child in the kitchen just before the mid-day meal. She begged for a cookie and then retreated from the room. Mrs. Whitlock has informed us that Mrs. Cullen left after gathering her cloak as soon as realization was made that the child was not to be found in the manor."

"Very well, have a horse prepared and send Eric to the outlying properties to confirm that Mrs. Cullen and Emma have not taken refuge in one of the cottages. If they are not found, request that help from those households be sent to aid the search. Have the men gather here and I will have Jasper coordinate their efforts. Have my horse prepared as well and ask Mrs. Cope to send someone with oil to fill every lantern and place them at the ready in back of the stables."

"Yes, sir." Tyler immediately turned and set about his tasks. I took a breath trying to settle my failing nerves as I scrubbed my hands over my face trying to grasp some semblance of calm. Sound minds would prevail this day and the focus of finding Isabella was the only thing holding my sanity. Determined not to waste another moment, I quickly made my way to the sitting room to discuss a strategy for the search with Jasper. I would not rest until they were delivered safely – Emma to her parent's arms and Bella to mine.

BPOV

"The entire house has been searched, ma'am. We cannot locate the child."

"Thank you, Tyler. Please inform the staff of the need to remain alert. I wish to be informed as quickly as possible when they have completed the search of the grounds."

Tyler nodded and took his leave as I surveyed the room. Rosalie sat in the center of the sofa, flanked on either side by Esme and Alice. Emmett and Carlisle were huddled over the small writing desk in the corner of the room studying a schematic that detailed every acre of the property that Collingsworth encompassed. I could not help but feel guilty of the reason for the fear and worry that consumed us all. Emma had been desperate to walk in the gardens this morning. We had become accustomed to taking a walk through the gardens, discussing what sorts of flowers should be planted and where. Her love for the outdoors was obvious, and I should have reasoned that she would eventually be brave enough to set out on her own if no escort could be found. She had begged me to accompany her on her explorations. I had taken her out to the trail that led into the woods a few times since acquainting her with it initially. She adored the adventure and I had promised to show her the stream that ran just beyond the trail when the spring came.

Until that moment, I had not considered that she might go in search of it on her own. Quickly gathering my cloak and departing the manor by way of the rose garden, I broke into a run after clearing the gate. No one used, or even knew of the trail and I had no doubt a search of the grounds would overlook its entrance. Finding the start of it, I ducked into the overgrown wooded trail and began searching for any indication that she had come by this way.

Some time later, having made a thorough examination of the trail, I came out into the flat field near the kitchen. There had been no recurring sign of her, so I quickly turned back and reentered the woods, intent on searching the area leading toward the stream.

* * * A H R * * * 

I was certain it had been several hours since I had left the house. The sky had darkened, the winds were howling and I knew it was verging on a storm. I thought momentarily that perhaps she had found her way back to the manor and my searching was for naught. But if it were not true, the time it would consume returning to the house would be wasted time that she remained lost. I wished many times that I had informed someone of my destination, but I had been so single minded that I did not consider that I might not find her quickly. I was thankful that I had remembered my cloak. I hoped Emma had remembered hers.

Shortly it began to rain and I realized my time was running out. As the temperature continued to drop, I was sure that the rain would become sleet or snow and Emma was exposed to the harsh elements. A shiver ran down my spine, not from the cold, but from the thought that she must be frightened at her circumstances. Continuously calling out her name, I made my way back up the banks of the stream toward the south as the winds turned bitter as they whipped through the trees.

Stopping at the water's edge, I called out her name and listened intently, trying to hear through the screaming wind and the sleet that had begun to fall. It was only a faint sound at first, like a small kitten's mewling. As I began to run toward the direction that I suspected the sound to originate from, it became louder and I realized I had found Emma.

When I finally reached her, I was certainly surprised at the sight that I found. She was clutching at a tree limb with her arms and legs wrapped around it fully, suspended over the stream about a height and a half above me.

"How have you come to be there, Emma?" I asked while removing my cloak and trying to determine the best way to remove her.

"I chaseded a swirrel up here and I cannot let go. I am scared, Aunt Isabella!"

"It will be alright. Stay there and I will come to you." I began climbing, knowing there must be the possibility of it if a four year old could accomplish it. It took several tries, but eventually I had progressed almost halfway when the heavens opened and the rains poured out. My grip faltered and I found myself sliding along the tree trunk, ripping my dress and scraping my legs before I regained my hold and began climbing again.

Finally reaching her, I found Emma to be not only fearful of descending, but unable to do so as her cloak was firmly tangled in the branch above her. The winds had whipped it about her so that had she attempted to climb down, she might have been strangled by the ties. Quickly releasing it from about her neck, I pulled her to me where she wrapped her little arms and legs around my body just as she had the limb moments before.

The descent from where Emma had been perched was much slower than the journey upward had been. After reaching the ground, I noticed her missing shoes as well. She promptly informed me that they had fallen from her feet and were swept away in the stream. We had no time to attempt locating them as it had grown dark and the heavy rains had turned entirely to sleet and ice, stinging from the force of the winds. Wrapping my cloak around her freezing little body and cradling her against me, settling her weight in my arms the best I could manage. I turned into the winds and began making my way toward the manor as quickly as my feet could carry us.

As worried as I had been all day over the welfare of this little girl, my thoughts were now free to wander as I knew she was safe. I began to worry over my father and whether he was warm enough and had enough wood to carry him through the storm. If the fire waned, he would certainly freeze. I determined I would ask Edward if it might be possible to send someone to look in on him and guarantee his well being. Emma began to squirm a bit and I shifter her in my arms to maintain the covering of my cloak on her body.

"Are you well, Emma?"

"I am cold. Are we close to home?" I was unsure how to answer her. I knew these woods well in the daylight hours. However the daylight had long since ended and we were wandering in the dark. I was fairly certain that I was headed in the correct direction, but I honestly had no idea how long we had been walking or how far we had come. Some of the sleet had now turned to snow and the wind kept it swirling around us in every direction, making it difficult to maintain a direct path. I was beginning to worry that we might succumb to the cold before I could get us home.

"I know you are cold, little one. I promise to do my best." I could not bring myself to promise to deliver her safely home as I now questioned my ability to do so.

My teeth were chattering and I was shaking nearly uncontrollably but I had no option except to keep moving. It seemed hours since we had left the stream. My body had been entirely numb for quite some time and I seemed to move more slowly with every step. The urge to sleep was nearly overwhelming and I had long since lost the ability to think clearly. My only focus was the manor. Deliver Emma safely to the manor.

Finally after what seemed like years, I could see light and hear men shouting. They were calling out, searching for someone. Emma. They are looking for Emma. Unable to take another step under the weight of this small child, I came to a stop and lowered her to the ground. I knelt down, removing my shoes and wrapping the bottom edge of the cloak around her body and up over her shoulders. She began to giggle as I placed my shoes on her tiny feet. Though it would be minimal, they would provide at least some protection from the harsh ice and snow on the ground.

"Mama said I am too little to wear these kind. Why am I wearing these?"

Lowering myself down to rest on my heels, I looked up and smiled at her sweet little face. Turning her toward the light, I gave her gentle instruction.

"Do you see the light, Emma?" She nodded and I continued. "Go as quickly as you can. Run straight to the light and tell whoever is there that you are Emma Cullen and ask them to take you to Collingsworth. Go, now, quickly."

"You come too, Aunt Isabella. Please." She looked a little nervous, but I could not risk her safety. I had no strength left and this was the best I could offer.

"I need to rest a moment, little one. Go, and you can tell them I will be along."

She wrapped her little arms around my neck and squeezed tightly before turning to run toward the light. I hoped it was the manor, but I was uncertain. It may have been one of the cottages or barns. I silently prayed that she would be met with kindness and that she would find herself in her mother's arms shortly.

My thoughts turned to Rosalie and Emmett. They would be overjoyed at Emma's return, but I was certain they would be furious with me for telling her of the trail and the stream. Had she never known of them, she would never have gone in search of them. I could only hope that her safe return would soften their anger. I wondered if Edward would be angry as well. Would he blame me for putting Emma at risk. I hoped he would understand how it came about. It hurt to think. I was having difficulty maintaining my grasp on my thoughts. I had just been considering Emma's parents, but now, for the life of me, I could not recall their names. I needed rest.

Closing my eyes, I leaned my body against a tree, unable to find the strength to stand. It seemed my arms and legs grew heavier with each passing minute. If I were just able to sleep for a few minutes, I was certain I could find the energy to return to the manor. Oddly, I was no longer as cold even though the snow and sleet continued to fall. I felt strangely peaceful and knew that it must be that I felt relief at having found Emma before it was too late. Taking a deep breath, I relaxed and let sleep come.

EPOV

Three hours. Three entire, fear-filled, agonizing hours since Jasper and I had returned to the manor. The daylight was long gone and the near-blizzard conditions were making it unbelievably difficult to determine where we had already searched. I had returned to the stables twice to exchange the horse I was riding for another, fresh horse as the conditions were rather harsh for the animals. In truth, they were simply harsh, regardless of species, but I would not give up the search until they were safe and to continue effectively, I would require well rested horses.

I stepped into the kitchen, gratefully taking a cup of hot tea from Mrs. Cope while waiting for the horse to be readied and the lantern refilled.

"You know, Mrs. Cullen is one of the most determined women I have ever known. Once she sets her mind to something, there is no deterring her from accomplishing it." Mrs. Cope was watching me closely as she spoke.

"She is that. Strong, brave, and I- I cannot…" The words caught in my throat as the tears burned my eyes. Stepping quickly to stand in front of me, Mrs. Cope grasped my empty hand in hers.

"Mr. Cullen… Edward, I have known you since you were near Emma's age. I have never known you to panic. You must be calm and keep your wits about you now. I cannot believe that they will not be found. That wife of yours is a smart one, and if anyone knows these grounds, she does. Have faith."

Memories of this room and Isabella were flooding my mind. Standing by the fire, offering her a cup of warm milk late into the night. Consuming a midnight snack before returning to our bedchamber for more enjoyable activities. Watching my Bella knead dough for bread and wiping flour from her cheeks. The weight of those memories was crushing as the thought of her lost and cold in the dark was overwhelming.

"Mr. Cullen! Mr. Cullen, come quickly!"

"Edward!"

The shouting of my family and staff brought me out of my daze immediately. Tossing my cup onto the worktable, I ran from the warmth of the small room through the dining room and into the great hall. Eric was handing a wet bundle to Emmett as Rosalie came running from the sitting room, followed by my mother and sister. Quickly moving to a settee on the far side of the room, Emmett removed the heavy wet cloth, tossing it to the floor and wrapped his daughter in his arms, weeping openly at her safe return.

Mrs. Cope came running with a blanket in hand which she wrapped around the child as Tyler retrieved the wet bundle of cloth from the floor. It was then I realized what Emma had been wearing.

"Tyler, bring that to me." Handing it over, he eyed me warily as I began to inspect it. Bella's blue cloak. I felt the air leave my lungs as I turned to Emma who was now smiling and regaining some of her color and excitement.

"Emma, sweetheart, did you see Aunt Isabella today?" I held my breath waiting for her response.

"Yes. She finded me in the tree by the water. She holded me while she walked to the lights. She gived me her shoes and said to come to the light and say my name."

"She walked right up to me in the stable, sir. Said her name was Emma Cullen and she needed to go to Collingsworth. Right smart little girl."

Eric continued to tell his story to the rest of the room, but my focus was on Emma. She was my link to Bella. "Emma, where is Aunt Isabella? Did she come with you to the stable?"

"No, Uncle Edward. She said she needed to rest and would come along. She was sleepy."

Jumping to my feet, I ran from the house to the stable, searching for the source of light. Where is the light visible? Finding the lanterns lined up and ready for the search party, I grabbed the nearest one and ran straight out toward the woods. I could hear my father and Jasper as well as some other voices I could not place, but I did not heed their shouts. Isabella was close enough to see the lights on the side of the stable, but she had no cloak, no shoes, and was apparently succumbing to the cold within reach of the manor. The cold would take her ability to think reasonably and she would undoubtedly want to sleep, I had seen it happen before. The body becomes sluggish and the only focus is rest and eventual sleep for the victim. I could not fathom that she was so close yet in such danger.

When I reached the edge of the woods, I lowered the lantern to get a better look at the ground as I walked, calling her name as loud as I was able. It only took a few moments for my eyes to settle on the green wool of her dress which was in drastic contrast with the white snow on the ground and swirling around her.

Running to her, I dropped to my knees and pulled her to me. Her skin was pale and ice cold, her lips an unsettling shade of blue. Her breaths were shallow and labored. Lifting her as quickly as I could, I grasped the handle of the lantern and turned to find Jasper behind me with a blanket in his hand and my father beside him, both with horrified expressions. Jasper wrapped the blanket awkwardly over my Bella, tucking it into my arms. My father took the lantern from my hand and we began to make our way quickly to the manor. Jasper broke into a run calling for Tyler as soon as he reached the door.

Moments later, I entered the house and headed straight for the stairs. I called out for Alice, knowing I would need her help once I reached the bedroom. I needed to get the wet, frozen clothing removed from her body and I would require assistance as I had no intention of letting her go. Tyler followed as well as my father and Jasper. I assumed my mother was with Rosalie, caring for little Emma.

Stepping into the bedroom, I instructed Tyler to place a blanket on the floor before the fire. As I lay Bella on the blanket, my father tended the fire, ensuring that it was blazing as Alice and I began removing clothing from her limp, frozen body. Once we had her dress removed, I heard Alice ask the men to wait outside. Tyler had already taken to preparing the bedwarmers, placing them quickly under the quilts on the bed then spreading another blanket over the top before leaving the room behind the others. I heard him call for Mrs. Cope once he reached the hallway.

Removing the last of Bella's clothing, I wrapped the blanket around her and rubbed briskly, drying her skin and trying desperately to increase her circulation. "Bella, love, can you hear me? You are home and safe. Emma is safe. Please, sweetheart, open your eyes. Please, Bella."

Feeling Alice's hand on my shoulder, I looked up at her blurred face and let the tears fall.

"Oh, Edward, it will be alright. We need to get her warm. I will step out so you can undress. When you are situated in the bed, call out and I will replace the coals in the bedwarmers."

Lifting her into my arms, I carried her to the bed and placed her toward the center, covering her quickly with the quilts. I made haste, stripping off my clothing until I was bare as well and climbed in beside her. Turning her on her side, I pulled her to me, pressing her back to my chest and wrapping my arms and legs around her small, cold body. Calling for Alice, I watched as she reheated the bedwarmers and lowered the lights in the room by turning the key on the oil lamps. Turning to face me, she spoke softly while stroking Bella's hair.

"She will be well, Edward. I know it. She cannot have rescued Emma only to lose her life for it. If for no other reason than you both deserve happiness, she will come back. You will see. She will come back to us. For now, you should rest. Get some sleep. I will stay and make certain the fire and warmers stay hot."

"I cannot bear to lose her, Alice. I cannot live without her."

"I know this, Edward. More importantly, she knows it. She will find her way back to us. We need only let her thaw out a bit. Keep her warm, tell her you love her, and hold her tightly. As women, we need little else to make us happy."

"Thank you. I am grateful for your help."

"She is like a sister to me. I cannot lose her either, Edward. What she did for Emma today was the most selfless and courageous thing I have ever witnessed. I am in awe of her strength. Given all the women in the world, I could not have chosen a better wife for you."

I nodded and tucked my face into Bella's neck, letting the tears fall freely. I would need to be strong for her, but for this moment, I simply held my wife tightly to my body, providing as much warmth as I was able, hoping it would be enough.


	24. Recovery and Surprises

**Wish I owned it!**

**Thank you so much to those of you who have left me your kind words and encouragement in a review. I had hoped to respond to more of them this week, but just have not been able to find the time. My students have a huge project that we are just about to wrap up and that should free up some of my time. The good news is that the next chapter is over half finished, so it should post in a couple of days. Thanks for reading!**

EPOV

It was several hours before sleep came. I held a vigilant watch until I began to feel Bella's body grow warm. At one point, she began to shake violently as I held her securely. Alice had called for my father to come see to her and he had remained in the room for several hours as he monitored her progress as well.

At one time, Carlisle Cullen had been the foremost medical authority in this area of the country. He had practiced medicine with great precision and overwhelming compassion. However, once his father passed, Whitfield had become his focus. It was a thriving estate and he would not allow his father's lifetime investment in it's success to fall to ruin. He had pressed all his energies into the management of the estate and only used his medical knowledge in emergencies.

Certainly, this was an emergency. Throughout the course of the night, my father diligently monitored her body temperature and her responses to stimulation to her feet and hands. Eventually I was able to find sleep and for a few short hours, all was quiet. It was the sound of shattering glass that jolted me from a fitful sleep. Raising my head, I watched as Alice knelt to pick up pieces glass from a small puddle on the floor. My father quickly joined her efforts, laughing and whispering softly.

"Surely you know that this will only get worse. Your clumsiness will increase in correlation to the size of that growing belly."

"Let us hope that Jasper's patience increases as well, then." Listening to my giggling sister, I struggled in my exhausted state to understand what I was hearing. It only took a moment before clarity came.

"Alice, your are with child?"

Her eyes immediately met mine and held a sparkle I had overlooked these last few days. She was smiling softly at me as she answered.

"I am. I had hoped to tell you soon after we arrived, but with all that has transpired in the last two weeks, I did not wish to add to your concerns."

I felt horrible guilt in that moment. Alice and I had always been close and we had shared everything in our lives. I was ashamed that she felt uncomfortable in sharing this monumental news.

"I am thrilled for you, Alice. You will be fine parents and I cannot wait to spoil a wee Whitlock. Please express my congratulations to Jasper."

"Thank you, Edward. I will offer your congratulations to Jasper. He was planning to work from your study this morning to take care of some estate issues while you look after Isabella."

As she spoke, she made her way over to the side of the bed to stand beside our father as he placed the back of his hand against Bella's forehead and cheek.

"Her color is much improved, Edward. She is warm to the touch and seems to be breathing normally."

"Why does she not wake?" I feared his answer, but could not keep from asking the question.

"It is likely that she is simply exhausted. She searched the woods, climbed a tree, and carried a child in the snow and sleet while enduring exposure to the cold. Her body worked tirelessly to retain some heat while she expended so much energy. She just needs some rest. She will wake when her body is sufficiently recovered."

Drawing the quilts back up around her snugly, he turned and placed his arm gently around Alice's shoulders. "We will leave you to it, Edward. Jane has been set in the hallway to await your needs. Call for me when she wakes or if she becomes agitated."

I nodded my understanding as Alice followed him to the door. Glancing back over her shoulder, she called my name, waiting until she had my attention before speaking.

"I will have Mrs. Cope prepare a tray for you. You have had no nourishment since the mid-day meal yesterday. You must keep up your strength, Edward. Promise me."

"Thank you, Alice. I will eat."

Her smile was blinding. She truly was happy and glowing and I regretted my inattentiveness to her since she had been here. I determined to make an effort to spend more time with my sister and Jasper in the coming days as Bella recovered. I knew she adored Alice and would enjoy the company.

As the door closed behind them, I turned back to my Bella, raising myself from the bed to lean over her, providing myself with a clear view of her face. Her hair had dried in tangled curls that splayed across the pillow. Her lips and cheeks were wind chapped and pink and her skin had regained its creamy color. Even in her incapacitated state, she was stunningly beautiful. I wondered about her life for the last three or so years. I knew what she had been through, the hard work she had to endure, the slow loss of her father, the fear of not knowing whether she would have enough income. As difficult as her life before our marriage had been, I had to wonder if she had encountered more stress and worry since she had returned to Collingsworth. Our marriage had been accepted by most of polite society it seemed. Those who had been rude or slanderous could be dealt with as time passed and were of little concern to me. My brother's wife was still a cause of discomfort. She had been given a brief reprieve as Bella recovered, but it would be my firm intent to protect my wife from any further distress where Rosalie was concerned. I would physically remove her from my house if it became necessary. As my mind began to drift in the direction of James Smith and any difficulty he might cause my Bella, I was startled by her soft voice.

"Edward."

Turning my attention back to her, I was immediately lost in the depth of her brown eyes which were heavy and slow to open when she blinked. Reaching up to brush the curls from her face, I smiled at her, feeling the ache in my chest loosen just a bit.

"Emma? She is –"

"Well. Emma is well and warm and resting comfortably in her bed, love. You are a brave woman, Isabella Cullen. How do you feel?"

"Tired. So tired."

"You can sleep. I will be here when you wake." As she sluggishly began to turn her body toward me, I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her over so she would have to make little effort. Tucking her against my chest, I kissed the top of her head as I felt her breathing even out and I knew sleep had taken her once again. Relief flooded through me at the knowledge that she had finally awakened. On some level, I had feared she might not come back to me and having seen her eyes, if only for a few moments, caused me to relax in the knowledge that she was still with me. Now, comfortably resting against the pillows with my wife pressed safely into my side, her hand clasped with mine on my chest, I could not imagine that life could get much better.

Hearing the door open, I turned my head expecting Alice or Mrs. Cope. I did not expect Rosalie to enter carrying a tray. She looked tired and her eyes were swollen and red, but I could not bring myself to care.

"Get out."

"Edward, please, I just wanted –"

"I have no care for what you want, Rosalie. You have had no concern for my wants or Isabella's for that matter. I will not allow you to appease your conscience when Isabella is in no condition to offer you forgiveness. My wife has been nothing but kind to you and has risked her life and health to ensure your child's well being. You in turn have offered her nothing but grief and venomous words. Get out of this room and consider yourself fortunate that the weather has turned or it would be my intent to have you thrown out of this house."

I turned my attention from Rosalie's stunned face and gazed down at my sleeping beauty. I would not regret my harsh words and would wait for Isabella's lead as to what she wished in regards to my brother's wife. I could understand her concerns regarding her daughter's future, but her methods were hateful and I would not allow Bella to be insulted in her own home. Had the snows not fallen, she would be leaving the estate today, to return only when she was truly remorseful about her behavior.

My eyes fell on the tray Rosalie had placed on the small table near the fire. I was hungry and Isabella was resting well, so I gently extricated myself from her and rose from the bed to wash and dress for the day.

A while later, dressed and relaxed, I sat before the fire and enjoyed a warm meal as I glanced over some reports Jasper had prepared regarding estate income for the last quarter. I must admit, I was impressed with the numbers and the projections for the coming spring. The estate was more profitable that I had realized. Truly, there was no need to recover the funds that had been stolen from the estate, but I would certainly pursue the arrest and prosecution of Mr. Smith. Rising from the table, I began to pace the area in front of the fire as I pondered the limited information we had concerning his whereabouts. I did not notice when Jasper entered the room.

"You have caused quite the stir. Rosalie is beside herself."

"I do not wish to speak of her. If you have come to plead for her, you waste your breath."

"I happen to agree with you, as does Alice. It is a commonly held fact that you do not cross a woman carrying your child if you wish to have more in the future."

"I will do my best to remember that bit of wisdom. Thank you, Jasper."

"I had come to discuss some new information regarding Mr. Smith. It seems he has left his London home and has returned to the country. As yet, no one has taken notice of him, but I am convinced he is in the region. I have made my inquiries discreetly so as not to raise his suspicion or alert him to our pursuit. I believe it is only a matter of time."

"Have you any objection to continuing with the investigation on your own? Of course, I wish to be informed of any and all information, but for the immediate future, I prefer to remain close to the estate and Isabella. I have no intention of leaving her for some time. The estate will also need my attention in the coming months as the tenants prepare for spring crops. I would also prefer to remain anonymous to the elusive Mr. Smith for the time being."

"Certainly. This seems the most reasonable course of action. Have you spoken with Isabella concerning any of this? Her signature appears on many of the documents immediately prior to her eviction, but there was no evidence that she was involved so her integrity was never in question. However, she may be upset by the events as they unfold, particularly those involving her father."

"Has there been something to implicate Mr. Swan?"

"Not at all. I simply meant that it might be difficult for her to know details regarding her father's misfortune. How is she?" Nodding his head toward the bed where Bella slept, Jasper glanced at me awaiting my response. I had no chance to offer one as Bella began to cough. I quickly moved to the side of the bed as she tried to sit up. Grasping the quilt, I held it snugly against her body as I spoke quietly to her.

"Stop, Bella. You are unclothed and we are not alone." Her eyes grew wider as she heard Jasper's voice.

"I will inform Carlisle that she is awake and send Alice to assist Bella." He made his way quickly from the room as I turned back to Bella.

"Water. Please, may I have water?" Turning to find the pitcher and cup beside the bed, I poured a bit into the cup and lifted her shoulders gently, placing the cup at her lips. She drank greedily before looking up at me. "Thank you, Edward."

"You are welcome, sweetheart. How are you feeling?"

"Better. I need… I – I…umm…" The blush covering her skin was nearly glowing and I was about to offer to carry her to the water closet when the door opened and Alice entered the room.

"Well good afternoon. You have certainly had your fair share of beauty sleep today." Then turning to me, she added, "Alright, you should leave us be. Bella will feel much better after she has a bath and a clean gown."

"I am going nowhere until my father has seen her." As the words left my lips, he came through the door, smiling widely at Bella.

"Our patient is awake. How are you feeling, Bella?" He was already assessing her for signs of ill effects from the hypothermia.

"Much better. I am thirsty and feel as though I could sleep for hours."

"Good. All normal responses for your condition. Be careful to drink slowly and perhaps you should have some broth to add some nourishment. Rest as much as you are comfortable. It is probable that you will feel the need to rest for a few days. I will watch you carefully for any signs that something is wrong, but I believe the worst to be over."

Bella smiled up at him and then glanced at me before looking back to Alice. I could not help but chuckle at her expression, knowing exactly what she wanted.

"Bella would like to have a bath. Have you any objection?" I sat beside her on the edge of the bed, taking her hand in mine as we waited for my father's answer. He thought for a moment before finally addressing Bella.

"I have no objections. In fact, you will certainly rest better after a relaxing bath. However, I would caution you against allowing your body to become chilled. We must keep your temperature consistent and warm. So remember to dry completely and dress quickly."

Bringing her hand to my lips, I placed a soft kiss on her knuckle before bringing it against my chest as I leaned in to place a kiss on her lips. "I love you, Bella. Thank you for coming back to me."

Giving her hand one last squeeze, I glanced at Alice and gave her firm instructions. "Take care of her, Alice. She is precious to me."

I did not intend to be gone long. There were matters to be addressed in the household, especially with the holiday quickly approaching. I met briefly with Tyler regarding staff that would need to be hired for the coming months in preparation for the spring planting. I sought out Mrs. Cope to address Bella's needs for the next few days and to inform her of my intent to take my meals in the bedroom with Bella until she was well enough to join the family in the dining room. Finally, stopping in the library, I chose a few books that I thought Bella might enjoy as well as a couple for myself. I had only been gone from her presence a little more than an hour, but the pull I felt toward the room which held her was overwhelming.

Opening the bedroom door, I found Alice pulling the quilts over a clean, dressed, and exhausted Bella. Her hair was in a braid that draped over her shoulder and down over her right breast. She was dressed in a light blue nightgown and her skin was a lovely pink hue. She looked more like herself than she had since I left her early yesterday morning. Alice gathered the linens that required laundering and smiled as she passed me before stopping at the door.

"I will have Jane bring your meal. Isabella has some broth and a bit of bread. Papa said you should call for him if need be, otherwise he will attend her in the morning. Have a pleasant evening." She reached up, kissing me on the cheek before exiting the room, closing the door behind her.

Turning back to my Bella, I found her bleary-eyed and attempting to stifle a yawn. Handing her the cup of broth, I encouraged her to drink a bit of it, knowing she would succumb to sleep soon, yet wanting her to have some nourishment before she did so. She consumed about half of it before handing it back to me. Placing it on the bedside table, I removed my shoes and situated myself in the bed beside her, pulling her into my arms and covering her shoulders with the quilts.

"Are you warm enough, love?"

"Yes, thank you. You are too good to me." She snuggled into my chest and I felt her body begin to relax.

"Never. I simply wish to provide you with the life you should have always had. I cannot begin to tell you how frightened I was, Bella. The thought that you would not be found in time was more than I could bear. For all the joy you have brought to my life, I can never be _good enough_ to you. Sleep now, my Bella. Dream sweet dreams."

Her breathing evened out and I knew she had drifted off. I held her in my arms for some time after sleep claimed her, unwilling to release her just yet. At some point, Jane had left a tray with my supper by the fire and I gently shifted Bella's limp body to rest on the pillows while I ate.

I sat, reading by the fire for some time once my meal was finished. Once the fire began to die down, I rose and tended to it, ensuring that it was blazing before retiring for the night. Reaching the bedside, I poured more water in Bella's cup on the chance she would desire more in the night. I glanced down at her as I turned down the lamps. Her cheeks were rosy and she was breathing deeply. For the first time in two days, I felt at peace. Climbing into bed beside her, I settled an arm across her waist and pulled her securely against my body before finding sleep as well.

* * * A H R * * *

The room was dark when I woke and the sense of dread was oppressive. Bella was coughing once again. It was a deep, resounding cough that did not falter, but seemed to take her breath. Lifting myself from the bed, I turned her toward me and found her skin like fire. I could not see her in the darkness, but knew her once rosy cheeks would be red with fever. I immediately began shouting for Jane. As far as I knew, she was still outside our room awaiting our needs. She opened the door at once.

"Have someone retrieve my father immediately, Jane. Call for another maid to prepare a pot of cool water. GO!"

As she ran from the room, I rose and turned up the oil lamps providing the room with light. Just as I suspected, her skin was pale with the telltale redness of fever staining her cheeks. Her skin was hot and dry to the touch and she was beginning to tremble. I pulled the quilts up around her snugly and moved to set the fire to blazing again as my father entered the room.

"What has happened, Edward?"

"She is feverish. I did not attempt to wake her but sent Jane to have some cool water brought up for compresses."

"Good, son. You've done well. I need to hear her lungs, will you lift her?"

I followed my father to the bedside and lifted Bella to a sitting position and leaned her against my chest so that my father could hear her lungs more thoroughly. I watched his face closely as he worked diligently. I could hear someone moving about in the room behind us, but I did not look away. Finally, as I gently laid her against the pillows, he placed his scope on the table beside the bed and faced me. I knew his news would be grim.

"I believe she has the onset of pneumonia. Her lungs are severely congested and her fever is substantial. It will be extremely important that we keep it down while keeping her warm. Her body will shiver and tremble with the effort to keep her warm. It will cost her energy that she needs to heal as well as heighten her fever. Someone must be with her at all times to monitor, do you understand?"

Nodding in understanding, I could feel the tears track down my cheeks. I had thought the worst was behind us. I had assumed she would be gaining strength and almost well in only a few days. My frustration was nearly overwhelming.

"Is she not to have a moment's peace? How is it that we find a bit of happiness, only to have it stripped away at every turn? It has overtaken her so quickly."

My father's hand clasped my shoulder as he drew me into his embrace. "It is likely that she was already exposed to some illness and in her body's weakened state, she could not longer fight it. She is strong, Edward. She will pull through this if we are diligent and care for her properly. Do not give up hope now. She needs you to hold steady for her."

When I looked up, my mother was already at Bella's side, pressing cool compresses to her face and neck. She inclined her head toward me and smiled. "Come rest Edward. I have slept well and I will keep the first watch. I promise to wake you if there are any changes."

Knowing I would not be able to sleep but needing to be close to her, I returned to my place next to her on the bed and reached for another square of linen and began wiping the wet cloth down her arms. We continued this way in silence most of the night and by the time the light of dawn came streaming through the windows, her fever was significantly lower. Her cough had increased but had not grown any deeper and her breathing was not labored. It was the best I could hope for.

In the early morning hours, my father came to examine Bella and record her fever. He had been monitoring it steadily throughout the night and was planning to attempt a ride into town this morning to seek that assistance of a physician. He had hopes that he might gain access to medication that would aid in Bella's recovery. The greatest obstacle in this endeavor was the weather. While the storm had passed, it left behind a great deal of snow and ice. We knew the roads would be impassable by carriage, but hoped he might be able to pass on horseback.

Once my father had departed and Mother and I had consumed our breakfast, I pulled a chair to the bedside and sat, holding Bella's hand as my mother sat beside me on the edge of the bed. There was really nothing else to say, so we sat in the quiet, listening to Bella's gentle breathing.

* * * A H R * * *

It had taken four days. My father had returned late in the evening with medication and we immediately began the treatment, maintaining our routine for keeping her fever down. There had been frightening moments along the way. Her fever had risen a few times to the point that she was convulsing. We submerged her, nightgown and all, in a tub of cool water to bring it down. She would twist and turn in the night as her body would ache with the spasms her coughing would cause. I had not slept more than a few hours as I feared she might worsen as I rested.

But finally, after four days, her fever broke and did not return. She woke in the early morning as I slept in the chair beside her, my hand entwined with hers. As I opened my eyes, I was met with her clear gaze. She called my name softly and asked for water, which I gladly provided.

It had taken a few more days before she was strong enough to get out of bed for any length of time. We would sit in front of the fire, where I would read to her or we would simply talk. One afternoon, Jasper brought a chess set from the sitting room and we began a daily battle of strategy, sometimes consuming us so completely that my Bella had a difficult time keeping herself awake and concentrating. I would carry her to bed where she would immediately succumb to sleep. Her strength was returning slowly as was her appetite. She had a difficult time finding the energy to eat much at all and her body had become so slight with the lack of nourishment. Alice would often try to tempt her with pastries, but they would often upset her stomach. My father was certain her appetite would return and encouraged us to relax and enjoy her recovery.

During the third week after the storm, Bella was strong enough to begin joining the family for meals. I brought her down for breakfast with the hopes of showing her the progress being made in the gardens once we finished our meal. The entire family was assembled and were overjoyed that Bella and I were dining with them. Especially Emma. We had not allowed her near Bella during the course of her illness as we were concerned with the possibility of it being contagious. This morning, however, Emma would not be kept away from my wife.

"Aunt Isabella! Are you still sick?"

"No, sweetheart, I am getting better every day. How are you today?"

"Fine, thank you. Mama said you are my garden angel. Is that 'acause you liked flowers?"

"I am not sure… um… " Bella glanced at me, confused. I must admit, I was uncertain as to Emma's meaning as well. Emmett was quick to explain.

"Guardian angel. Isabella is Emma's guardian angel." Turning to Bella, he spoke sincerely. "I can never thank you enough for your brave and selfless act, Isabella. I will forever be in your debt."

Bella smiled gently at Emmett as her eyes welled up with tears. "I adore her, Emmett. I would never have been able to leave her to the cold." She turned, embarrassed, and pressed her face into my chest. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her shawl snugly around her shoulders. Once she regained her composure she turned back toward the family and took her seat at the table.

Breakfast progressed with much laughter and joy as I felt complete for the first time in weeks. It wasn't until I heard Alice's schedule for the next day that I realized just how out of place I had been over the last few weeks.

"Mrs. Cope has assured me that she will have wrapped treats at the ready for any callers we have tomorrow. I am certain we can expect several of the families from town to call in the afternoon. Isabella's illness has been well publicized so there is no expectation for either she or Edward to make calls. The staff will receive their gifts after the evening meal and will have the day off tomorrow."

As she continued speaking, I realized that I had forgotten how close the holidays were. Tomorrow was Christmas Day. I was stunned. I had not realized how much time had passed as I worried over my wife. Turning to meet her gaze, I recognized the same stunned expression in her eyes. Quickly regaining my thoughts, I leaned in close to her and asked, "Have you finished your meal?"

"I have."

"Then come, I would like to give you a gift now."

Her eyes widened briefly, but she placed her hand in mine and I pulled her to stand from her chair. As we excused ourselves, Rosalie's voice caused us to stop.

"Isabella? Might I have a moment of your time later? At your convenience, of course."

I knew Bella would not refuse her. But I was surprised to hear her response.

"I am happy to accommodate you, Rosalie. I will send for you after I have rested. You must know, however, that I will not meet with you alone. Edward will be at my side."

To her credit, Rosalie gave her a genuine smile and nodded. "Thank you. I will wait to hear from you."

We stepped out of the room and I waited for Bella to regain her bearings. She was more than a little surprised at Rosalie's kind manner this morning. After a moment, she placed her hand in mine and followed me to the conservatory. I led her to the windows overlooking the rose garden. It had been cleared of all the overgrown vines and the fountain and benches had been cleaned and polished as well. Currently, the stone path and walls were being repaired where minor damage had occurred from lack of care and maintenance. It would be beautiful in the spring and summer when the blooms were full. I turned to gauge Bella's response.

"You have hired new staff?" Her question was certainly not what I expected.

"Yes. Tyler took care of it in my absence. Is there a particular concern with the new hires?" She was staring intently at a man working on placing a stone in the wall where it had begun to crumble. After a moment, she frowned as she faced me fully.

"I just did not expect you to have hired Mr. Smith."


	25. Recognition and Reassurance

**Still don't own it. Still wish I did.**

**Wow. You guys are amazing. I am overwhelmed at your response to this story. I have been awful about replying to reviews as usual, but I already have much of the next chapter written, so hopefully a quicker update will help you forgive me. So, if I haven't replied and said 'thanks' well, "Thank You!"**

BPOV

"James Smith? Isabella, are you implying that you know that man as James Smith?"

"I am not implying anything. I am informing you with absolute certainty that man is James Smith. I have known him most of my life and there is no mistaking his identity."

Edward continued to stare at me blankly as though he could not comprehend the words as they left my mouth. Suddenly he was in motion, pulling me behind him and away from the window as he kept his eyes on the man now holding his full attention.

"Edward, what is –"

"TYLER!" He did not look away from the window as he shouted for Tyler and my quest for an explanation was unheard and unanswered. I heard the door open behind me as Tyler rushed into the room and quickly presented himself to Edward at the window.

"Sir?" Edward lifted his hand and indicated the man in question as he addressed Tyler.

"Who is that man? What name do you know him by?"

Tyler looked closely at Mr. Smith before offering an answer.

"Sir, his name is Hamilton, Joshua Hamilton. He was hired for the gardens."

Edward turned to face Tyler and gauge his response. "You hired him personally?"

"I did, sir, yes."

"I require his papers. I want his letters of character and reference and anything else you have. Retrieve them now please, and inform Jasper that I require him in the study in ten minutes." Turning to me, he gently took hold of my arm and pulled me toward the door. Confusion and worry set in as I could not comprehend his sudden tense manner. Pulling my arm from his grasp, I came to a halt, causing him to stop and turn immediately. "Isabella, come with me."

"What is it, Edward? What has caused your alarm?"

"Isabella, do not be difficult. Please, let me ensure that you are safely away so that I may sort this issue." Reaching back he grasped my hand, pulling me forward once again as he was intently focused on removing me from the room. It was when we reached the staircase that I realized what he had said.

"Safely away? What is the danger?" Again, my voice was unheard as his focus was elsewhere. At the landing, Jasper rounded the corner and Edward stopped abruptly.

"Have you spoken with Tyler?"

"I have. All of the documentation is in the study and Tyler is now gathering the employment papers. We will get this sorted, Edward. He has foolishly exposed himself and will be held accountable for his actions."

"Good. I will settle Isabella and join you shortly. Thank you, Jasper."

Unwilling to wait for a response, Edward turned and began to lead me down the corridor toward our room. Once inside, he closed and locked the door only to turn and begin searching through the wardrobe for some unknown item. I called his name twice, receiving no response. Something was horribly wrong and I could only imagine the severity of it to have unnerved him so entirely. Finally, after pulling a small bundle of linen from the lower drawer of the cabinet, he began to speak while unwrapping what I believed was a firearm.

"I will send Jane to pack your things and prepare you for travel. If there are particular items you wish to take, you should gather them as well."

At his words, I began to shake and could feel traitorous tears falling unhindered. He was sending me away and it was due to the presence of Mr. Smith. Surely he had not been told a falsehood regarding Mr. Smith and myself. Had I confirmed some rumor by recognizing this man. I could not imagine what scenario would cause him to dispense of me so suddenly. I had no option but to beg for his leniency.

"Edward, please, whatever it is you are thinking, I do not – I have no – I only recognized him from our household here. I have not been acquainted with Mr. Smith for four years. Please, hear me." Hearing my plea and the broken sob that escaped immediately following, Edward looked up, his expression turned to shock and he was across the room pulling me into his arms before I could register what was occurring.

"What can you be thinking, love? I have no thought of something untoward or illicit. I only meant to provide for your safety. Oh, sweetheart, do not cry." Cupping my face in his hands, he smoothed his thumbs across my cheeks, wiping away the tears before wrapping me once again in his arms. My relief quickly turned to worry as his words sank in.

"Why would I not be safe in our home?"

"Bella, we have information that would seem to prove that Mr. Smith was heavily involved in the loss of your home four years ago. I think it might be wise to remove you from Collingsworth while we settle this business."

"I do not wish to go."

"It will not be your decision. However, I will agree to reserve that determination until I have spoken with Jasper. Will you rest now? I will return to you shortly and we can discuss it further."

Knowing I would not have his full attention until the matter was resolved, I nodded in agreement. Smiling softly, Edward leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead before releasing me and stepping away. Truthfully, I was tired from the simple exertions of the morning. It seemed that I needed rest after the easiest of activities since my illness, but I was growing stronger each day. Edward had remarked just this morning that he noticed more color in my cheeks. Of course, this only caused a blush which elicited a rich laugh from him at the irony.

Walking across the room, I sat on the edge of the bed as Edward lifted my feet and removed my slippers, placing my feet under the quilt. Grasping my hand, he placed a gentle kiss on my palm before turning my hand over and repeating the action. Giving it a final squeeze, he released my hand and quickly left the room, closing the door behind him.

My mind was racing with a mixture of curiosity, worry, fear, and dread. Why was Mr. Smith employed as a gardener? More importantly, why was Edward so concerned regarding Mr. Smith's employment? In my exhaustion, I could not force my mind to process it. I chose to clear my head and let sleep come, hoping to have a candid discussion with Edward later.

It seemed I had been sleeping for hours. My arms and legs felt as though they had anchors holding them down as I tried to rouse from my slumber. The room was cold and dark. It seemed the fire had burned itself out at some point and no one had bothered to tend it. My first thought was that it was unlike Edward to allow the fire to dwindle, causing fear to begin to well up as I considered what that might mean. Feeling a breeze, I turned my head in the direction of the window, knowing the bit of moonlight streaming in there might illuminate the room.

My body froze in fright at the sight before me. Beside the window stood Mr. Smith, staring intently at me with a sneer on his face. I tried desperately to find my voice as he began to stalk toward me with an evil glint in his eye.

"Bella!" I heard Edward calling for me in the distance as Mr. Smith's hands grasped my arms, pulling my body up from the bed. Crying out for help and swinging my fists at him seemed futile until I heard Edward's voice in my ear.

"Bella, sweetheart, look at me. Open your eyes and look at me!"

Opening my eyes, I was met with Edward's worried face. One arm was wrapped around me, holding me against his chest as the other held my wrists, restraining them from their assault on him. Looking around the room, I immediately noticed the sunshine pouring into the room from the window and the fire burning brightly in the hearth. Realizing that I had been dreaming, I clutched at Edward's shirt as he held me tightly.

"James was here. He was watching me by the window. He – he was angry, he –"

"Shhh, all is well, Bella. You were dreaming, love." He began to gently stroke my back as he held me and my crying waned. Finally able to control my breathing and tears, I looked up at him to find him watching me closely.

"I am sorry, Edward." I felt foolish for my hysteria and hoped he had not been unduly alarmed.

"Why do you apologize for something out of your control? It was a dream, nothing more. I am sorry that you were frightened." After a moment, he released me to rest back on the pillows as he reached for a glass of water beside the bed. Offering it to me, he waited until I was finished before replacing it to the table and asking, "Will you tell me?"

I closed my eyes trying to remember the details. I knew it must be the tension and fear that I felt before my nap that had caused my mind to create such a vivid picture and I had little desire to relive it in words. Edward waited patiently for me to begin.

"I woke to a dark room and a cold hearth. There were no sounds, as though the house were empty. Mr. Smith was here, in this room. He stood by the open window and was angry. I could not find my voice to call for help." I quickly brushed away the tears that had fallen as I finished speaking. "I know it was a dream, and I feel so foolish for causing you to worry."

I glanced up and found Edward watching me with a tender expression. He brought his hand up to gently run his fingers through my hair, pushing it from my face as he whispered words of comfort.

"It was just that, Bella. A dream. You are safe and warm and loved. I will not leave you alone. Your body and mind are exhausted from your illness and the stresses of the last couple of months. It is not surprising that you cannot escape it even in sleep."

_I will not leave you alone_. His words echoed inside my head as I considered how to ask him about Mr. Smith's presence at the estate. Edward feared for my safety, yet I feared how my heart might suffer at being sent away from him. I decided to seek the most important answer first. "Will you force me to leave you?"

His eyes immediately snapped to mine, holding my gaze for a moment before he scrubbed his hands over his face and stood, walking toward the fire. After a few minutes of silence, he turned to face me.

"I have no wish to send you away, but I must be prepared to protect you." Heaving a sigh, he continued. "I have asked Jasper to come and explain what he has found regarding James Smith. Are you prepared to have this conversation now?"

I nodded in affirmation, hoping that my racing mind might be put at ease once I knew everything.

"Very well. I will have Jane bring up tea while I find Jasper." Walking toward the door, he turned and looked in my direction, but did not meet my eyes as he spoke. "Bella, I cannot tell you how sorry I am for bringing such turmoil into our lives. It seems I am unable to provide a peaceful home for you." He did not wait for a response, but exited the room closing the door behind him.

I was stunned. And angry. Turmoil was my life before Edward and while, yes, the beginning of our marriage was difficult, he had given me more security, comfort, and peace than I had known in years. I could not allow him to shoulder the blame for something that was beyond his control. Rosalie, Tanya, and even James Smith were all responsible for their own actions.

Knowing that I had more pressing thoughts to process, I rose from the bed, saw to my personal needs and brushed through my hair, braiding it and leaving it to fall down my back loosely. As I slid my feet back into my slippers, the door opened and Edward entered the room, crossing to me quickly and pulling me against him, wrapping one arm around my back and cradling my head against his chest with the other. The intensity of his embrace was startling and felt as though he had feared I might not be here when he returned. Leaning back, I looked up, catching his eyes with mine.

"What is it?"

"I love you, my Bella." His lips pressed gently against mine as his hands came up to tangle in my hair. I could feel his panic as the kiss became desperate. His hands turning and tilting my face to the angle he desired. His tongue seeking mine, tangling and forceful. Though he was always passionate, this was different. This was the kiss of a man who worried it might be his last.

Pulling away from his kiss, I brought my hands up to cup his face, searching his eyes. "What has happened, Edward? Please, you are frightening me."

"I am worried for your safety. The thought that you might be placed at risk is more than I can bear." Heaving a sigh, he grasped my hand and tugged me forward. "Come, Jasper is waiting in the sitting room with my parents and Alice. We will tell you all that we know and perhaps you can enlighten us as to the things we have yet to understand."

A few minutes later, as I was seated with a cup of tea, Jasper began to explain all that he had come to know regarding James Smith.

"Isabella, I believe we have a fairly clear timeline for Mr. Smith, however, if there are discrepancies that you recognize, please inform me immediately so that we might have an entirely correct account." At my nod of agreement, he continued. "To the best of our knowledge, Smith was hired by your father eleven years ago. At this time, he assumed responsibility for the household expenses and payroll, requiring only Mr. Swan's signature on the documentation before it was distributed to the creditors and employees. I would venture a guess that after six years as a trusted employee, Smith had gained Mr. Swan's favor and was given a free hand over the estate finances. The difficulty began as your father's health began to deteriorate. It became nearly effortless for Smith to reallocate the income from the estate to his personal accounts with Mr. Swan in no condition to question the discrepancies. Isabella, do you recall at what point you became involved with the estate finances?"

I thought for a moment before answering. I had been completely oblivious to the fact that the estate was in financial peril. It was only when a creditor had come to the estate to get my father's signature on some paperwork involving the transfer of funds that I began to question the accuracy of the accounts. I remember distinctly that it was early spring as I had been in the rose garden inspecting the new growth that had begun there when Smith informed me of the presence of the creditor. It was that day that I knew our time at Collingsworth would be short.

"I believe that it was the early spring. I began to look at every account and every expenditure. I could not make them balance and knew that something was amiss."

"I suspected as much. We have tracked back all of the estate deposits and expenditures and can prove a direct correlation between the estate and Mr. Smith's private accounts. Do you understand what I am telling you, Isabella?"

I nodded in response. "You are saying, very simply, that Mr. Smith is a thief. That he took a substantial amount of money from the estate and fled when he thought it might be discovered." My memories of that time were consumed with how the loss of our home would affect my father and me. I had worried about the staff and how quickly we could place them in other homes so to ensure their continued employment. I had not considered that the discrepancies in the accounts could be discovered. That the loss of the estate could have been avoided. My attention was returned to the conversation in the room as Edward seated himself beside me, removing my teacup and saucer from my shaking hands and handing it to someone behind us. As I met his gaze, I found him watching me carefully as Jasper continued his explanation.

"Exactly. The difficulty we are faced with now is that we cannot discern his intentions. He gave a false name when he gained employment here. None of the prior employees remained here, so his deception was plausible." He paused and looked to Edward, who nodded slightly before continuing. "Isabella, we are concerned that he has returned to Collingsworth to perhaps exact revenge. It was only when you began to question the accuracy of the finances that he lost his easy income. It is possible that he blames you for his incomplete acquisition."

I began to shake my head and stood to pace the area as I spoke. "That is not logical, Jasper. There was no more income to be had. He had already stolen most of the fortune of Collingsworth."

Edward stood and joined his father behind the desk near the window. They began to line up the documents before them, rearranging and folding pages. The only sound in the room was the rustling of paper and the pounding of my heart, although I was sure that it was unheard by anyone but me. Once they had the documentation settled, Edward held his hand out to me.

"Come here, Bella. Let me show you something." Joining him behind the desk, he wrapped an arm around my waist as he drew his finger down the page to a substantial number on an accounting log. "Have you any idea exactly how prosperous Collingsworth Estate truly is? This is the income for the last month alone. A winter month at that. Imagine what the amount will be once the fields are harvested and the orchards are producing."

I am certain my face displayed my utter shock at what he implied. My eyes flew between his face and the numbers indicated on the log before me. When I was able to speak, the words came out in a whisper. "You are certain these numbers are correct?"

Edward's eyes softened as he brushed a stray hair from my cheek. "You truly had no idea. Yes, love, the numbers are correct. We have been very careful in our accounting and there are no discrepancies that have not been accounted for. I can detail all of it for you if you wish, but as we may be limited on time, I must ask you to trust me. Will you?"

Snapping my eyes to his immediately, I answered without hesitation. "Always. I will always trust you, Edward."

His gentle smile and the feel of his arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer to his warm body caused all other thoughts for flee. I was completely lost in his gaze as I realized that I did trust him entirely. I had since the day we met and I trusted him to understand as I explained our odd circumstances. I trusted him to keep his word and care for my father. I trusted him with my heart as I admitted my love for him, hoping he would love me in return. Trusting him to navigate our lives through whatever vile agenda James Smith had concocted. A throat clearing beside me pulled me from my thoughts as I slowly averted my eyes from Edward's penetrating stare. Lifting my eyes to the others present in the room, I caught Alice's wide smile and could not help the blush that covered my skin as Esme shook her head, laughing softly. Turning my attention once again to Jasper, I asked his opinion on my newly gained information.

"What is it you believe Mr. Smith hopes to gain by his presence here?"

Sitting on the edge of the desk, Jasper took a deep breath before speaking. "I cannot know his intentions, however, I believe there can be no good in it. He brought the estate to near ruin, thwarted only by your discovery of his seemingly poor accounting. It is my belief that he intended to bankrupt Collingsworth, leaving it worth very little at auction. With the income he had stolen he could easily purchase the estate and restore it to its prior grandeur while holding no guilt or care for the lives he devastated in his quest for riches and power."

"And you believe he holds me accountable for his failing?"

"I do."

"What are we to do now?"

Edward took my hands in his and kept his eyes on his thumbs as they gently stroked over my knuckles. His words were quiet, but resolved. "We believe the best course of action is to allow him to remain in the employment of the estate so that we may carefully observe his actions in hopes of learning his intent. We will know his whereabouts at all times as well as limit his access to the manor. Should he move to cause harm, it will be our best chance to thwart his efforts."

"And what of my father? Is he in peril?" The thought of my father at Mr. Smith's mercy, unable to even recall ever having known him was overwhelming. I could bear any difficulty we might face as long as I knew my father was well. Carlisle stepped forward and addressed my concerns immediately.

"Isabella, I have taken your father's care personally. I realize we did not discuss this, but as you were struggling with fever, I could not leave him to a physician who could not attend him daily. You do know how he has progressed? Edward has told you?"

I nodded in understanding. I knew my father had grown progressively worse in the last few weeks while I had been ill. He was no longer speaking and sat contentedly staring into the fire or out at the snows to pass the time. He could only be troubled to eat once each day, if that, and no longer felt the need to shave.

"I know it is difficult, but you should know that I do not expect him to be long for this life, Isabella. Edward has informed me that he refused to leave the cottage when you offered to bring him here and I believe that is the best course to follow. He is familiar with his surroundings and will be at peace there. I have engaged the services of an older couple to live in and care for him. Edward has assured them of their ability to remain in the cottage after… well, indefinitely."

He stopped speaking, looking to Edward for direction as to how to continue. I quickly spoke up to alleviate the awkward silence.

"I have no misgivings regarding my father's health. I know it is a matter of time and not much of it. I must know if you believe him to be at risk?"

Edward shook his head, speaking softly. "No, sweetheart, we do not believe him to be in any danger. He poses no threat to Smith and would not recognize him by any measure."

Meeting his gaze, I sought the answer to the only question that remained. "And what of me? Do you still intend to send me away?"

"Bella, please. You must understand, it is for your safety."

"No. How will I remain safe if we are apart. It will destroy me, Edward."

Taking a step toward me, Edward raised his hand as if to caress my face. I immediately retreated a step from him, needing to keep a clear mind and knowing I would not be able to do so if he were touching me.

"Bella –"

"No, Edward. No. I cannot bear it! We will both be distracted and I will not _feel_ safe apart from you. Please… please, Edward." By the time I finished, my words were barely a whisper and the tears were flowing freely down my cheeks. Edward's brow was furrowed as he stared at the floor. When he finally lifted his eyes, they widened at the sight of my tears and frightened expression. It was no longer James Smith that caused me fear, but the thought that my husband would hand me over to another for safekeeping.

Edward quickly closed the distance between us and wrapped me in his arms, rocking gently. The only sound was the soft click of the door as it closed behind us. I knew we were alone and leaned back to look up at him. He raised his hand to wipe the tears from my face as he spoke.

"I can deny you nothing. I fear for you, my Bella. I will not be able to live with myself if something happens to you."

"You will keep me, then? You will not send me away?"

"Never." His eyes were fierce as he spoke that single word and instantly his mouth covered mine in a consuming kiss. I grasped at his forearms, pulling myself closer to him as his hands buried themselves in my hair, tilting my head to give him control of the kiss. It was powerful and passionate and I began to feel lightheaded when he finally pulled his mouth from mine, only to continue pressing his lips and tongue to my chin, jaw and throat.

When we were both nearly overwhelmed, he pressed a final kiss below my ear and buried his face in my neck as our breathing slowed. After a moment, he lifted his head to meet my eyes. "I will keep you safe, love. Whatever it takes, I will protect you."

* * * A H R * * *

After a quiet dinner in our room, Edward had requested that Rosalie and Emmett join us for breakfast in the morning room. I was nervous about that conversation, but realized that of all that we had facing us, Rosalie was of little consequence. The remainder of our evening had been quiet as I sat in Edward's arms near the fire as he read aloud. The deep, rich tone of his voice as well as the security of his arms had lulled me close to sleep. Taking notice of my extremely relaxed state, Edward lifted me gently, carrying me to our bed and tucking the quilts in snugly before slipping into the opposite side and pulling me back into his arms. I turned toward him, pressing my face against his chest, his hand covering mine at his waist. We lay quietly for a few minutes before he spoke.

"Bella, this morning when I spoke of sending Jane to gather your things, you were upset and afraid."

"Yes."

"Do you fear me?"

I took a moment to gather my thoughts, wanting to be sure of my words before I spoke. It was important that he understand exactly how I felt. "I do not fear you. I fear being without you. When I realized you planned to send me away, I did not know you worried for my safety. I assumed you were upset that I knew Mr. Smith. That you thought there might be an involvement of some sort."

"It never occurred to me that he was anything more than an acquaintance or past employee."

"He was not. Truthfully, my fear had nothing to do with him." Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and gave a voice to my greatest fears. "Edward, I grew up in this manor and wanted for nothing. I had every advantage and every opportunity a young lady could be offered. It was devastating to lose it all, but I found a way to endure. But now, if I lost you, I could not survive it. I would not wish to survive it. I live in fear each day that somehow you will realize your error and all this will end."

Edward was quiet and still for quite some time. I worried that I had upset him and ever so slowly began to remove myself from his arms. Feeling the movement, Edward tightened his hold on me before reaching down and pressing a finger under my chin to lift my face to meet his eyes.

"It is an unnecessary fear, love. I cannot be without you and cannot let you be without me. I fear you will tire of me and realize your mistake in not leaving when you had the chance."

I could not help but giggle as I answered, "But therein lies the truth of it. I did not have the chance. I belonged to you entirely from the moment I fell from that ladder."

Smiling softly at me, he placed a gentle kiss on my forehead before drawing me closer and wrapping me snugly in his arms.

"Sleep, my love. Your body needs strength for, truth be told, my resolve weakens every day."

"Edward!" I pushed against his chest as he chuckled lightly.

"I only speak the truth, sweet girl. Tomorrow is Christmas and I am certain that Emma will not allow us to sleep past dawn."


	26. An Apology and an Atrocity

**Don't own anything.**

**Where are you guys coming from? Don't get me wrong, I love that you are enjoying the story, but I would love to be able to thank whoever is sending you my way. Thank you so much for your kind and encouraging words. I don't get a chance to respond to very many reviews, but I do read and cherish each one. Thank you, thank you, thank you. If I were able, I would send Edward to each of you for the day…. Well, who are we kidding here? If I had access to Edward I would hide him away and keep him to myself. Don't judge, you would too!**

**Okay, so I am sure some of you will be angry about the early part of this chapter, but keep in mind that there is still more story to go. And I am sure many of you will be angry or distraught about the end of this chapter, but keep in mind, I am always a HEA girl. Enjoy.**

BPOV

His lips were pressed into a soft pout and his lashes rested in a dark fringe on his cheeks. It was rare that I had the opportunity to observe him as he slept. He was beautiful. Unable to resist any longer, I shifted closer and placed a whisper soft kiss to his lips, chin and jaw. He drew in a deeper breath, and the arm that lay across my waist tightened ever so slightly, but otherwise, he did not move. Snuggling into his body, I pressed a kiss to his bare chest and immediately felt his hand fist the fabric of my nightgown.

"Bella." His voice was raspy with sleep and his eyes remained closed, however, his arms and jaw were tense.

"I am sorry. I did not wish to wake you, husband, but you are difficult to resist in the early morning light."

He smiled softly at me and then shifted his hips and lower body away from me while brushing the hair from my face, bringing his hand to rest on my shoulder. Searching his eyes intently for I could not comprehend his reticence, I realized that perhaps he no longer desired me. I did not wish to make him uncomfortable, but felt a desperate need to know. I held his gaze as I whispered my query. "Have I displeased you?"

His brows drew together in a confused frown. "Displeased… how do you –" His eyes widened in understanding as he immediately spun our bodies so that I was lying under him as he held my face in his hands. His eyes were dark as he focused them intermittently on my eyes and mouth.

"Isabella, the only thing impeding me from ravaging your body is your weakened health. Displeased? My greatest displeasure is that I cannot keep you here and have you on every surface and against every wall in this room. Repeatedly."

His words coupled with the blatant desire in his eyes burned away any hesitation in my mind. Grasping his hair, I pulled his lips to mine in a hard, passionate kiss. The moan that escaped his mouth was enough to fuel my courage. Holding his mouth to mine, I wrapped my legs around him and pressed my body wantonly against his as his arms wrapped around me. Pulling me with him, he rolled onto his back, then sat up abruptly, holding my thighs against his hips as his mouth placed hot, wet kisses down my neck and onto the exposed flesh of my chest.

The sound of ripping cloth caused our eyes to meet. His were dark, lustful and wild. Glancing down at my shredded nightgown, his eyes fixed on my naked breast as he spoke. "My control is tenuous at best, love. I need –"

"Yes. Please, Edward." My words granting him permission, he held my hips firmly as he thrust upward, joining our bodies. Gasping at the sensation, I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, my hands finding his hair as his mouth covered my breast. He began to push up against me gently. Needing more, I held him to me tighter, grinding my body against his. It was only a moment before he grasped my hips, moving me to meet his thrusts, pressing harder and faster with each pull and push. It was more carnal and wild than any intimacy we had shared before and I found myself lost to coherent thought, drowning in pleasure.

Minutes later, as our breathing slowed and the pounding of our hearts subsided, Edward leaned back into the pillows, holding my body against his, so that our bodies remained joined as I lay atop him. He pulled the quilt over us and continued to stroke his fingers lazily along my spine. Happily sated, I began to doze in his arms.

It could only have been a short while that I drifted on the edges of sleep when I was brought fully awake at the sensation of fullness. Lifting my head, I was met with Edward's shy smile as a slight blush tinged his cheeks.

"I suppose this was not the best position to recover. Your body is too tempting." Pressing an open mouthed kiss to his chest, I sat up, keeping my thighs against his hips, placing my palms flat on his chest and began to slowly raise and lower myself on his body. "On the contrary, husband, this is the perfect position. I believe we have several weeks of missed opportunity to atone for and it is Christmas."

* * * A H R * * *

After finally removing ourselves from the bed and each other, we rang for our breakfast to be brought up to the sitting room adjoining the bedroom. As Jane entered and began setting up the meal, I paced nervously before the fire. Edward watched patiently for some time before finally taking my hand and pulling me to stand in front of him. Pressing a finger under my chin, he brought my eyes up to his.

"Bella, this is your home. She is a guest and has been a rude and difficult one at that. You must know that I will not allow her to address you in any fashion that will cause you discomfort. Honestly, I believe her intention is to make amends."

Opening my mouth to respond, I was unable to utter a word as a knock sounded against the door. Squeezing my hand, Edward called for our guests to enter. Emmett entered the room followed by Rosalie. She immediately met my eyes and offered a timid, nervous smile, which I returned in the same manner. Edward was quick to direct us toward the table and moments later we found ourselves seated and surrounded by a nervous silence.

Taking a quick breath, Rosalie spoke first.

"Isabella, I – I know I cannot deserve it, but I must beg your forgiveness. I have been so blinded by my aspirations for my daughter that I have alienated her affections, offended our family and hurt you terribly. I realize that while I caused such damage to your life, Emma would truly be a better person for your influence. I am so, so sorry for the hurt I have caused you."

She was weeping and seemed truly broken for the grief she had caused. I believed her words were sincere, however there was a nagging question that I needed her to answer.

"Rosalie, I must ask, did you know of Miss Denali's intent regarding my husband?"

Her eyes snapped up to mine as her head began to shake vehemently. "I assure you, I did not. Had I known what her vile thoughts were, I would never have encouraged her to consider a courtship with Edward. I had no idea she was capable of the wanton desires she expressed."

Casting my gaze to the teacup in front of me, I gathered my thoughts and composed myself before addressing her. Once I felt confident, I met her pleading gaze.

"Truly, Rosalie, you are already forgiven. I have always understood your concern for your daughter, I was just injured by your unwillingness to offer common courtesy on behalf of our family. I must admit, that while the forgiveness comes easily, the trust does not. It will be some time before you have earned my confidence."

Smiling through her tears, Rosalie nodded as she responded, "I understand and I will endeavor to be worthy of your trust, Isabella. Thank you." She was silent a moment before she spoke again, her voice breaking with sincerity. "You must know, I will never be able to repay what you have done for Emma. I was frozen in panic and fear while you relied on your strength and knowledge to risk all for her. I owe you her very life."

Reaching across the table to grasp her hand, I kept my eyes on hers as I answered, "I have no doubt you would have done the same for Edward's child. Do not think on it anymore. We are family and will care for each other."

The tears turned to laughter moments later as Emmett clapped his hands together and announced that if we were planning to blubber over the food, he would prefer that we remove ourselves as he and Edward were hungry. Our breakfast was full of pleasant conversation and timid glances and was over quickly as the rest of the family was waiting to exchange gifts until we arrived. Emma had risen very early and had already opened most of her gifts and was currently napping.

Emerging from our room, Edward and I followed Emmett and Rosalie downstairs to find the staff assembled in the great hall. Jasper met us at the bottom of the staircase with a stack of envelopes in hand. It was a custom I knew well as I had observed it many times over the years. However, this would be the first time I would be an active participant as the mistress of the house.

Beginning at the head of the line, Edward greeted Tyler, wishing him a pleasant Christmas and handing him the envelope which I was certain held a large income. This was repeated as we advanced to each staff member, offering them our thanks for their devoted service. As Edward handed them the envelopes, I offered small packages filled with nuts, dried fruits, and a gold coin for each of their children. It was only after we had retired to the sitting room with the rest of the family that I realized Mr. Smith had not been in attendance. Meeting Jasper's eyes, he gave me a slight nod and I knew it did not escape his notice either. I determined to put it from my mind for this day as we celebrated with our family.

I had never experienced the holidays with a large gathering. For many years I only knew my father's company and for the last few years, my father had not even acknowledged the holidays at all. Today, however, I was blessed to have a love I never dreamed, parents, brothers, sisters, and a darling niece. I found myself overcome with emotion on several occasions. Edward would pull me close, understanding my tearful gaze. The gifts were thoughtful and generous in nature, yet simple. As I had been very ill in the weeks leading up to Christmas, Edward, unwilling to leave my side, had enlisted the help of his sister and mother to arrange gifts for us. It was only after the mid-day meal that Edward pulled me into the conservatory, looking for a private place that we might exchange our gifts to one another.

Pulling out a stool, Edward had me sit while he knelt before me, holding my hand in his own as he toyed with my fingers.

"Bella, ours was not a typical courtship or wedding, and while I would change very little about it, I would like to offer one thing that we have overlooked." Keeping his eyes on mine, he brought my hand up to his lips, placing a soft kiss on my fingers. It was at that moment that I noticed it. Sparkling in the afternoon sunlight that had been so rare in the winter months, was a stunningly beautiful ring, placed securely on my finger. A square cut emerald surrounded by tiny diamonds on each side sat regally in a delicate gold band. Unable to take my eyes from it, my words came out in a whisper.

"Edward, it is beautiful. It is too much."

"Nonsense. It belonged to my grandmother. You are very much like her in your courage and determination to find the good in all circumstances. It is perfect that it should grace your finger, yet it is much less than you deserve. Merry Christmas, my Bella."

Holding it closer that I might see it better, I used the other hand to brush away the tears. Shaking my head and smiling, I looked at my sweet husband in pity. "You should have allowed me to present my gift first. It will be a poor comparison to this."

"I have need of nothing. Anything you offer will be a treasure."

Reaching into the pocket of my apron, I pulled out a small box tied with green ribbon and held it in the palm of my hand. Smiling widely, Edward lifted the box and removed the ribbon, opening it with a curious expression. Upon seeing the onyx cufflinks, he brought his worry filled eyes to mine.

"Bella, these are too dear to you. I cannot possibly – "

Placing my fingers against his lips to quiet him, I responded to his concern. "I cannot wear them, Edward, and they are offering no benefit to anyone sitting in a box inside the wardrobe. Please accept them. They are of value to me only in that they have been passed through generations of my family. As I am the last, the only child of only children, it is right that my husband should have them. My father would want you to have them."

He smiled gently at me before offering his wrist while holding out the small box containing the cufflinks in the other. Grinning at him, I made quick work of the cuffs, placing the links and straightening the folds before releasing his hands to admire them.

"Very handsome, sir."

"Thank you, my dear." Chuckling at our lightheartedness, Edward stood and offered his hand. "I have a carriage ready if you would like to see your father today. What say you?"

"I assumed the staff had been given the day to spend with their families. Who has prepared the carriage?"

Edward stepped back, raising his hand to cover his chest as though I had injured him. "Wife, you wound me! Do you not have the confidence in me to think I can hitch a carriage? Come! I will provide the proof of my masculinity."

Taking my hand, he pulled me to the entry hall where my cloak and his topcoat were waiting. Once we were sufficiently robed, he led me outside where a small carriage did indeed await our arrival. Offering his hand, he assisted me into the seat before joining me to make the short ride to the cottage.

The remainder of the afternoon was a memory I would hold for the rest of my days. My father had not responded to us at any point during our visit, but he was peaceful and calm. I held his hand and told him of our holiday and described Emma's antics with her new playthings and frocks. Edward read aloud to us from my father's favorite book of poetry and when Papa's eyes grew heavy, I kissed him and left him to sleep. It was not the Christmas visit I would have wished for, but it was a precious afternoon on what I was certain would be his last holiday in this life. The couple who were caring for him were kind and seemed to have a genuine concern for his comfort and well being. I could ask for nothing more.

Later that evening we shared a meal with the rest of the family and when it was late into the evening, I leaned into Edward's arms trying with great difficulty to stifle a yawn. Noticing my effort, he laughed and said our goodnights, claiming he would rather I fell asleep in our bed rather than on my feet.

Once we were settled into our warm bed, Edward turned on his side to face me with a cautious expression. I waited for what seemed like hours for him to voice his thoughts. When I could stand no more, I broke the silence.

"You look as though you will burst. What is it, Edward?"

His lips quirked up in the tiniest of smiles as his cheeks tinged pink. After a moment, he began to speak. "Bella, this morning, something you mentioned to Rosalie has caused my curiosity to be stirred." He was silent for a moment, seeming to search for the words he wanted. "You spoke of 'Edward's child', do you recall?"

"Yes."

"Is this something you have considered? My children?"

I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks as well, knowing I would have to answer honestly. "Yes. Truthfully, I have often considered it. I would someday very much like to bear your children." As I spoke the words, it occurred to me that he might not desire children. I need not have worried. As soon as the words left my mouth, he pressed a kiss to my lips, grinning widely.

"It is not something we had discussed and I had not realized how much I desired it until the words were spoken this morning. I am in no rush, but I am happy to know that we are in agreement."

"I love you, Edward."

"As I love you, my Bella."

* * * A H R * * *

The days passed without incident. Edward had resumed the management of the estate as well as planning for the spring planting and ordering the necessary supplies so that when the time came to prepare the land, the tenant's needs would be met. Carlisle and Esme had returned to Whitfield for the same purpose. They were planning to return in a short time as Alice would need her mother's assistance in preparing for the arrival of her child in the late spring. Emmett, Rosalie and Emma had also returned to their estate, settling back into their lives with the promise of another visit in a couple of weeks. They would be returning to see Rosalie's family and would stop over with us to break their journey. Jasper and Alice were the closest of our family and were staying on with us for a while longer. I believe this had more to do with James Smith than any other factor.

I continued to see my father nearly every day. Edward joined me for these visits as he was able. Papa seemed to rest more easily after hearing my husband's soothing voice reciting from the books he always loved. It was an overwhelming thing to watch Edward care for Papa with such gentle kindness having never known him before the day we wed. I missed hearing his voice and seeing recognition in his eyes when we visited, but I was thankful for the time we had with him. He grew thinner and weaker as the days passed, but remained peaceful. I knew I would lose him soon, but was relieved to know that his passing would not be painful in mind or body.

With Edward out in the afternoons, calling on the tenants or handling various business arrangements, and Jasper either sequestering himself in the study with the account logs and contracts or in town meeting a client, Alice and I grew very close. We spent our afternoons knitting and embroidering any conceivable article of clothing her baby might need. She had less patience than I when it came to embroidery, usually preferring to construct the garments once I had completed the delicate stitchery. We passed the time sharing stories ranging in subject from our lives as children to the antics of Edward and Emmett as adolescents. Of course, these were stories I used to tease him mercilessly as we were alone. He constantly vowed to seek his revenge on his sister by spoiling her child so horribly that she would have no hope of control. I loved to witness their good natured teasing and laughter as well as the entertainment that ensued when Jasper was involved as well.

While I knew that Edward and Jasper were keeping a very close watch on Mr. Smith, I had relegated him to the corner of my mind, determined that I would not allow him to influence my happiness. He was still employed by the estate and Jasper was working very closely with the depository to track Smith's income as it compared to the estate accounts. There had been no discrepancies and no overt attempts by Smith to force any confrontation. However, this comfortable and content existence was shattered on a single afternoon in late January.

For the past several days, Edward had spent the afternoons making rounds at the south fields, discussing planting with the tenants that inhabited those cottages. He was expected to return for the evening meal, as were Jasper and Alice, who had spent the afternoon in town at the market. It was a rare occasion that I found myself alone in the manor and contentedly spent the afternoon hours in the library, curled up on the sofa with a beloved book. After hours of silence, the soft click of the door closing startled me. Looking up, I was met with the intense gaze of James Smith.

Quickly rising to my feet, I dropped the book behind me as I addressed him. "Mr. Sm – Hamilton, how can I help you?"

He cocked his head to the side, seemingly surprised at my use of his alias. I briefly wondered how he had passed into the house without notice. Knowing already that the bell to ring for Tyler was on the opposite side of the room, I did not remove my eyes from his face.

"Come now, Miss Isabella. We have known each other far too long for you to address me so formally. Please call me James."

So he would not even hold to the pretense that he was Mr. Hamilton. However, his familiarity angered me. "We have known each other for many years sir, but we are not happy acquaintances. You may address me as Mrs. Cullen."

"Yes, I had heard the glad news. Congratulations on your marriage. Although, I must say, I had understood there was something of a scandal in the beginning. It seems to have subsided somewhat now, however. I suppose that has more to do with the fact that you are not presenting a round belly than common sense."

I could feel my face heating at his words. Certainly I knew that many of the gossips would be watching for any signs of pregnancy. I suppose I should be relieved that it had not occurred. Realizing his attempt at distraction, I again addressed his purpose for presenting himself unannounced.

"You have not answered, Mr. Smith. What is it you require of me?"

Grinning wickedly, he stepped forward, slowly seating himself in Edward's favorite chair. Only when he was situated comfortably did he speak. "Well, that is the question to be considered is it not, _Mrs. Cullen_? What do I require of you? Hmmm… so many options."

I did not respond, but kept my expression passive as I watched him, waiting for him to continue. Finally, he leaned forward, placing is hands on his knees, pressing his lips into a hard line and narrowing his eyes as he began. "I have very specific requirements for you, Mrs. Cullen, so perhaps you should make yourself comfortable."

"I prefer to stand, thank you."

Smirking evilly at me, he chuckled, "Stubborn. That may serve you well in the days ahead." Suddenly serious, he spoke with intensity. "I would suggest you listen carefully to my proposition as I will accomplish my goals. The question to be answered is who will be injured in the process. SIT DOWN!"

Startled by his angry outburst, I took a step back before stumbling onto the sofa. Keeping my eyes on him, I righted myself and sat, my body on full alert for any sign of aggression. It only took him a moment before he began again.

"Have you any idea that I asked your father for your hand, Isabella? I had served faithfully for years. I had earned every coin honestly and with no complaint. I realize you were young and I was happily willing to wait, even for you to experience your first Season. However, your father claimed there could be no match as we were socially incompatible. He desired an advantageous marriage for you and I did not meet his standards. Ironic, is it not, that his refusal cost him everything? I waited for my moment. He trusted me foolishly. I suppose he considered me beyond loyal if I was willing to wed his daughter." He laughed darkly as he rose to his feet, pacing between the chair and the hearth. I remained silent, stunned by his admissions.

"It had expected it to be more of a challenge. I thought surely he would observe the discrepancies, but he did not. I went so far as to make them glaringly obvious, and yet he did not comprehend that I was removing his fortune before his eyes." Turning to glare at me, he continued, "Until you set your mind to it. By the time you discovered what was happening, I fled. My ultimate design, to purchase the estate at a substantial loss to your father was not realized, but he lost it just the same. A fitting end, I would offer."

He returned to the chair and again leaned forward, this time placing his elbows against his knees and clasping his hands in front of him. "So this is what I require of you, Isabella. I want my estate, and you will hand it to me."

"It is not mine to offer."

"No? Well, it would seem we are both mistaken then. Consider this. You will hand over either the estate or your husband. I will allow you to choose. Either way, I will have what I want."

I processed his words, but could not understand what he meant. "I do not understand. What exactly are you demanding?"

"It is simple really. You will alter the accounts, in the same manner I accomplished it before. Of course, you will have to be more creative now that it has been exposed, but I am certain you can achieve it. If you are unable to gain access to the accounts, your other option is to walk away from your husband and your marriage."

"This is ridiculous. I have no access to the accounting for the estate. And should I choose to leave him, it would not gain the estate for you."

"Truth be told, you are correct. I cannot imagine losing you would be enough to make him leave his senses. However, I do have an acquaintance who is familiar with your husband and who is more than willing to step in and offer him comfort. Of course, while she warms his bed in your absence, she will not be hesitant to provide me with what I ask. Perhaps you remember her? Miss Denali informs me that you have indeed met, although I cannot say her opinion of you is a flattering one."

While his words sickened me, I still found holes in his reasoning and knew it would not work. I pushed a bit further, trying to understand his scheme. "And if I choose neither option?"

He laughed loudly, causing me to cringe away from him as his words became cold and sharp. "You may do as you please, Isabella. But you should know, I have spent these last few weeks using the income I earned from your husband to hedge my bets, so to speak. I have aligned the entire population of tenants on the east property and most of the south end as well. At my will, they will scuttle their crops, losing a massive income for the estate. Once I take ownership they will be handsomely rewarded with property ownership as well. Perhaps it will take me a substantially longer amount of time to gain what I seek, but in the end the result is the same. I will be master of Collingsworth."

Anger flashed through me, hot and consuming. Standing, I took a step toward him so that in order to keep his eyes on my face, he was forced to recline in his seat. From this position, I spoke my simple plan.

"You are a fool to offer your agenda so indiscreetly, Mr. Smith. I will simply inform Mr. Cullen of your intent. You will be imprisoned by first light."

He regarded me with a bemused expression as he spoke. "Then you will have chosen an unspoken option, to be sure."

"Which is?"

"You speak a word of it, and your dear husband is a dead man. I will not hesitate to end his life and make certain that his wife of a hasty marriage is called into question for his murder. I leave the choice in your hands, Isabella. Your happiness, his reputation, or his life. I would not hesitate for long in making your decision."

He stood and walked confidently from the room while the full weight of his words took my breath. Gasping for air, I reached for the arm of the sofa, lowering my body to my knees. I was able to able to take in just enough air to call out for help as my mid-day meal forcefully left my body.


	27. Trusting Myself and Trusting You

**WOW! You guys really have some definite expectations of our Bella! I will admit that this chapter was almost complete when I posted the last chapter, but after reading your reviews, I did go back and look through it again to be certain that I would not be crucified. I think Bella has come a long way and I try to write her as I would respond if I were in her shoes. I would certainly be the girl who would run in the face of difficulty. My own sweet husband had enough of that after a few months of marriage and confronted me on that, asking me to trust him. It worked in our situation as we are in our 16th year of marriage and still in love (though not always in like).**

**Anyway, I hope you all stick with me. I look forward to hearing your thoughts on this chapter. Thanks.**

BPOV

I had no way of knowing how long I sat on the floor of the library, gasping for air and retching with no result. My palms were flat on the floor, providing a weak support for my shaking arms. At some point I heard Alice's voice, then Jasper's before I felt gentle hands lifting me and a cool cloth on my neck. When my breathing finally slowed and I could comprehend my surroundings, I found myself seated in the sitting room with Mrs. Cope pressing a cold cloth across my face and Jasper kneeling in front of me, holding my wrist in such a way that I was certain he was monitoring my heartbeat. Glancing up at my face, he smiled at me and stood, pulling a chair closer to my seat before settling himself in it.

"My apologies, Isabella. My sweet Alice has a bit of a tender belly right now and could not bear the retching. I can bring her now if you would rather."

"Has Edward returned?" I was desperate to see him. I felt as though I could not breathe normally or keep my thoughts focused until I could see him with my own eyes.

"No, I am sorry. He has not returned. Would you prefer me to retrieve Alice?" It was the second time he had asked and I knew he would bring her, but I could not ask it of her. She had finally reached the time in her pregnancy that allowed her to keep her meals without being ill. I could only imagine how difficult it must be to witness the sight, sound and odors of someone else's illness. I shook my head, indicating that he should leave her be.

Tyler entered the room carrying a tea tray. Placing it before me, he poured a cup and placed it in my hand. "You should drink this, ma'am. It was steeped to be weak and will settle your discomfort a bit. It should also help you to know that Mr. Cullen has arrived at the stable. I expect he will be in momentarily."

"Thank you, Tyler," I whispered, weakly.

Seconds later, Edward breezed into the sitting room and strode over to the sideboard, quickly pouring himself a drink. He had obviously noticed Jasper and began to speak of his visits with the tenants. It was only when Jasper called his name that Edward stopped speaking, responding immediately to the somber tone in Jasper's voice. Turning toward us, his eyes locked with mine and widened at my sad state. He was instantly before me, his hands on my face as he fought to keep the panic from his own countenance. The moment his hands touched me, harsh sobs erupted from my body as I shook uncontrollably. Pulling me against him, I could hear him speaking to Jasper, but could not make out the words. Moments later, I felt his able fingers releasing the closures on my dress and sliding it from my arms as someone wrapped a quilt around me from behind. Lifting me to stand, Edward supported me in his arms until the dress fell to the floor around my feet. Once it had, he lifted me, quilt and all, and sat in the chair cradling me to his chest.

We sat unmoving and silent for some time. It was only when Mrs. Cope brought more tea that I noticed we were alone. Lifting my head, I asked why Jasper had left.

"It was a bit stressful for a while, sweetheart. I am certain he went to see to Alice. She was rather upset at your hysteria. Are you feeling well enough to talk, Bella?"

Meeting his eyes, I saw his concern and worry and knew that I would need to put him at ease, but could not calm my thoughts enough to bring it about. I was nervous and scared and felt very exposed having been relieved of my soiled dress. Closing my eyes and breathing deeply, I offered him all I could at the moment.

"I need to redress, Edward."

"Bella, you are upset and barely –"

"I am very upset! And I am scared and sick and I cannot form a coherent thought, Edward. I wish to feel a little less vulnerable by dressing myself!" He stared at me with wide eyes as though I had struck him with my hand. Blinking twice, he dropped his eyes to the floor for a moment before bringing them back to mine, full of remorse.

"Forgive me. I find myself overwhelmed by your current state and I should have considered your feelings rather than pressing you for an answer. Of course you are out of sorts. I will have a bath drawn for you and we can talk after. Perhaps then your stomach will have settled enough for some tea and toast." His words were so sincere and heartfelt, I could feel the tears once again falling. Edward rose and began to walk toward the door. I could not bear the thought of him leaving the room, even for a moment.

"Please do not leave me." At my words, he turned quickly and caught my gaze before nodding and crossing to the other side of the room and ringing for Tyler instead. Upon his arrival, Edward instructed him to send one of the maids to prepare a bath and fresh clothing in our room as well as tea and toast at the ready for me when I had redressed.

As Tyler left to see to the requested preparations, Edward came to stand before me once more, silently offering his hand. Reaching up, I placed my hand in his and stood, leaning against him as his arms wrapped around me once more. After a few quiet minutes, he tightened his arms as he spoke.

"I will require an answer, Bella. While I have not seen it so severely, I do recognize the fear and anxiety in your eyes. I have seen it there before, but surely you have grown to trust me." Lifting his head from mine and placing his hands on my cheeks, he lifted my head so I had no choice but to look into his troubled eyes. "Do not run from me. Do not shut me out, Bella." He brushed his thumb across my bottom lip. "Your lips proclaim your trust, but…" He lowered his hand and placed his flat palm against my chest where my heart was pounding a fierce rhythm. "… will you trust me with your heart?"

Though I had been offered the atrocious options by James, I knew there was only one option that I could choose. Leaning my cheek into his hand, I nodded in acquiescence.

"I will tell you everything. I just need to collect myself for a bit so that I may remain calm."

Releasing me and stepping to the side, he smiled and grasped my hand as he tugged me gently toward the door. "Come then, a warm bath awaits."

Once upstairs, I began to remove what was left of my clothing as Edward checked the temperature of the bathwater. Jane placed a towel on the floor beside the tub before stepping out of the room. As I lowered myself into the bath, Edward turned toward the door to exit the room.

"Must you go?" He stopped and tilted his head back toward me while looking at the floor.

"Would you not be more comfortable were I to leave?"

My response was a whisper. "Please stay with me."

Turning to face me, he smiled widely and retrieved his book, holding it aloft. "Shall I read? It seems to be soothing for you when I do so."

I nodded in agreement at his suggestion and reclined against the back of the tub. He pulled a stool closer to the fire and opened to a well-read passage.

"Live with me, and be my love,

And we will all the pleasures prove

That hills and valleys, dales and fields,

And all the craggy mountains yields.

"There we will sit upon the rocks,

And see the shepherds feed their flocks,

By shallow rivers, by whose falls

Melodious birds sing madrigals.

"There I will make thee a bed of roses,

With a thousand fragrant posies,

A cap of flowers, and a kirtle

Embroidered all with leaves of myrtle.

"A belt of straw and ivy buds,

With coral clasps and amber studs;

And if these pleasures may thee move,

Then live with me and be my love."

His eyes never left mine as he recited the passage from memory. The tenderness in his face as he spoke was overwhelming as his words from Christmas eve flooded my memory.

"_I cannot be without you and I cannot let you be without me."_

And the words I had uttered earlier that same evening.

"_Always. I will always trust you, Edward."_

Abruptly sitting forward, I grasped the washcloth draped over the edge of the tub and began washing my arms and shoulders. Edward watched, startled for a moment before he questioned me.

"Bella? Are you well?"

"I am well. I wish to be done here for I have much to tell you. Will you ask Jasper to join us? I will finish here, dress and meet you shortly." I was determined to demonstrate my trust in my husband. I would not allow James Smith to cripple me with fear. I had no idea how we would fare in the midst of this mess, but I knew we would be stronger together than we could ever be on our own.

Edward rose and knelt beside the tub, pressing a kiss to my temple then leaning his forehead where his lips had been. His voice was but a whisper. "I love you, my Bella. Your strength amazes me."

He did not wait for my response, but rose and left the room to find Jasper, I supposed. I finished my bath and dressed quickly, brushing and braiding my hair before descending the stairs to find my husband.

Standing outside the library, I could hear Edward, Jasper and Alice talking quietly inside, but could not bring myself to enter the room. Retreating to find Tyler, I sent him into the room to retrieve Edward. I waited only a few moments before he came to me in the corridor.

"Bella? Will you not come in?" He held his hand out to me, waiting for me to answer.

"I –I cannot go in there. Will you attend me in the sitting room? Please?"

Seeing my distress, his answer was immediate. "Of course. I will inform Jasper."

Nodding once, I turned and walked the short distance to the sitting room. Once inside, I stood near the fireplace, drawing comfort from its warmth as I awaited their arrival. Moments later I heard them enter, followed by the soft click of the door. Almost immediately, I felt Edward's warmth as his arms wrapped around my shoulders, drawing my back against his firm chest as he held me close. After a long moment, I stepped forward, removing myself from his embrace and drew in a deep breath.

"I must tell you all that occurred today, but it will be unpleasant. Please allow me to reveal it in its entirety as I am certain you will have many questions and will surely be angry." I waited for their agreement which came quickly, then poured a cup of tea for Alice and one for myself. Taking a sip of the warm liquid, I closed my eyes, desperate for a moment to gather my thoughts. Opening my eyes, I turned to Edward and raised my cup slightly.

"I will gladly pour your tea, but perhaps you would like to prepare something a bit stronger. My words will alarm you, I am certain." He said nothing, but did rise and prepare a strong drink for himself and Jasper. After handing off the drink, he stood by the hearth, placing one hand to rest on the mantle.

Knowing there was no easy way to begin this discussion, I was perhaps a bit abrupt. "James Smith presented himself to me today."

"What? Why have you said nothing, Isabella?" Edward was livid. The hand holding his glass shook for a moment before he turned sharply, throwing it into the hearth. Placing his hands on the mantle, he dropped his head, obviously attempting to regain control of his emotions. Jasper and Alice sat motionless, Alice watching Edward while Jasper's eyes were trained on me. After a moment he spoke.

"What is it that he desired of you?"

"The estate. He desires ownership of the estate and has laid out a detailed plan as to how he might achieve it. Can you bear to hear it?" My question was directed to Edward, who had not moved since shattering his glass on the marble. Finally lifting his head, he turned to face me. His countenance was contrite, but his voice was full of tension.

"Forgive me, love. I find it difficult to abide the knowledge that he was near to you. I will attempt to reign in my frustration. Please, tell me all of it."

For the better part of an hour, I spoke of our encounter in the library earlier that afternoon. For the most part, Edward was able to control his anger. It was only when I spoke of Tanya's involvement or the threat of my imprisonment for his murder that his calm mask would falter. He would stand and pace the room between the hearth and the windows, running his hands endlessly through his hair.

When all had finally been relayed, I stood, trembling, waiting for a response. Alice quietly wiped the tears from her face while Jasper stared at the fire, absently rubbing his forefinger across his chin. Edward stood for a moment with his arms folded across his chest, staring at the floor before suddenly striding to the door, exiting the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Jasper glanced at the door before turning his eyes back to me. Alice focused her eyes on the door as though she were willing him to walk back into the room. It was silent and there was no movement for a stretch of time until I feared I might come apart from the extended tension. I turned to Jasper and spoke quietly.

"I suppose I will leave it to you to decide what should be done. I have no knowledge of the law or civil matters as I am sure you are aware. If you will excuse me now, I am rather exhausted and would like to retire." Not waiting for a response, I took a few steps toward the door before I heard Alice's voice.

"Isabella, he will – "

"I trust him, Alice. Good night." I spoke before she could finish, knowing I would be unable to hold myself together if I had to consider what he might be thinking. Leaving the room, I went directly upstairs, wanting for nothing more than sleep.

Standing in the middle of the bedroom, I could not bring myself to lie in our bed. It seemed so large and cold on this night when I missed him so terribly. Instead, after dressing in my nightgown, I curled up in Edward's chair by the fire. It was the same one he placed me in on the first night I spent in this room when I slept in his arms after declaring my love for him. It was also the chair I sat in on the night of the ball as I sipped a glass of port and Edward massaged my aching feet before making love to me the first time. Closing my eyes at the memory, I relaxed into the seat, drawing my knees up and tucking my feet under me.

EPOV

I had been an utter fool. I knew in my gut that she was at risk. I knew that Smith would find his opportunity to threaten her and yet she was left alone in the manor this day where she was vulnerable to him. I had left her without protection and she had been forced to endure his vile presence.

I felt sick and could not even chance a look at her as her words registered in my mind. Knowing I would lose my temper and perhaps cause her more fear than she had already experienced, I quickly left the room. Unable to stop moving, I left the manor, walking into the woods in an effort to calm myself. Stopping near the spot where I had discovered her half-frozen and unconscious in the snow, I sat on the ground, leaning my back against a tree as I allowed my mind to process a possible outcome.

We had obtained more than enough evidence to convict Smith of embezzlement. That was an easy solution. I suspected, with a little effort, we could press forward with conspiracy charges against both Smith and Tanya Denali. I would need to confer with Jasper regarding the possibility. As I allowed my mind to construct an immediate plan to rid Collingsworth of Mr. Smith once and for all, I began to feel the overwhelming need to hold her close to me and feel her warmth. Standing to my feet, I walked back to the manor, intent on finding my Bella as soon as possible.

Upon entering the manor, it appeared I must have been gone longer than I intended. The great hall was dark, as was the sitting room. Passing the library, I could see the light and hoped she was inside. Stepping into the room, my eyes quickly found Jasper's angry countenance.

"Where have you been? Have you any idea what you have done?" Jasper's words were harsh and cold. It was an unusual tone to hear in his voice and I found it alarming.

"What has happened?"

"Happened? Nothing has _happened_ Edward, except that you have perhaps broken your wife's heart. Had you bothered to spare her a glance, you might have noticed the look of devastation in her eyes as you left her standing alone in that room."

"I did not think – "

"That is the difficulty. You did not think. You have repeatedly asked her to trust you. Today she found the strength to offer you that trust and you choose to walk away from her when she was most vulnerable."

He brought both hands up to scrub across his face before pushing them through his blond curls. Turning back to me with a sympathetic eye, he asked, "What have you determined regarding Smith?"

I spent the next few minutes explaining my thoughts to Jasper and inquiring about our options from a legal standpoint. Having already written several letters and set them aside to be delivered at first light, he only waited for my confirmation to proceed. With any luck, Smith would be in custody before the morning meal.

"Will it be difficult to accomplish?" I hoped he could give me some reassurance.

"There are always circumstances we cannot be certain of, but according to Isabella's account of the confrontation, I believe he is desperate. He seems to be grasping at any chance he may have to acquire the estate and by tipping his hand to her, he has enabled us to locate witnesses to his folly with little effort."

Turning my eyes toward the door, I wondered if she were sleeping or if she might need some warm milk. Truthfully, I wondered if she would be able to forgive my stupidity. Unable to see past my own anger and frustration, I had not considered what her needs might be and now I had no idea if she would allow me to attempt to make amends.

Hearing Jasper's soft chuckle behind me, I turned to see him watching me. "Go to your wife. You will be a lucky man if she actually allows you to enter your room. You should begin now to pray that she already sleeps." After a moment, he furrowed his brow and continued. "Truly, Edward, I will arrange the arrest and statements. Tend to Isabella and be sure that she is made to feel secure. She has no need to worry about Smith."

Bidding him goodnight, I made my way to our room where I found it too dark and cold. The fire had dwindled, allowing the winter wind outside to draft into the room unhindered. Bella was curled into herself, asleep in my favorite chair. As I walked to her side, I wondered idly why she had chosen to sit here rather than in our bed under warm quilts.

Reaching out to lightly stroke her cheek, I found her skin extremely cold and made the quick decision to remove her to the bed in an effort to warm her. Lifting her into my arms, I carried her to the bed and tucked her in snugly before tending to the fire and stripping my own clothes. Joining her in the bed, I pulled her close and hoped she might find some comfort in my presence rather than the anger and hurt I deserved. Sleep would not come quickly, but I would welcome the end of this day.

A sharp pain on my left cheek startled me awake. In her sleep, Bella's small fists were pounding against an unknown assailant. Grasping her hands in my own, I held them tightly, waiting for her to either wake or for the nightmare to pass. She suddenly let out a mournful wail and began crying out my name. It was a heartbreaking sound that nearly brought me to tears as she ceased her physical struggle. Pulling her against me, I wrapped her in my arms and gently kissed her forehead while whispering my reassurance in her ear. "Shhh. I am here, my Bella. I have you."

The rest of the night progressed much the same way. I would sleep for a bit, only to wake to her cries or her fists. She would calm for a bit, only to repeat the occurrence a while later. When morning finally arrived, I did not wake her, but had our breakfast brought to the room, allowing me to remain with her as she continued with some much needed rest.

It was mid to late morning when Jasper sent a message informing me that Emmett, Rosalie and Emma would be arriving the next morning and would be staying for a few days on their way to visit Rosalie's family. I knew Bella would be thrilled to see Emma and I was looking forward to informing her of their visit. Approximately an hour later, I received another message informing me that James Smith had been arrested and was in custody pending a formal hearing. Inquiries had also been made regarding Miss Denali, but her whereabouts were currently unknown.


	28. Apologies and Aspirations

**I own nothing.**

**Okay, let me begin by saying how sorry I am that it has taken me so long to get this out to you. It is contest season for my students and we have been in serious rehearsals. I am on a long weekend now and hope to do a lot of writing to make up for it.**

**I know there are MANY new readers with me now and I can't thank you enough for taking the time to enjoy my story. I have been terrible about replying to reviews for the same reason that I have been slow to update. I am hopeful to catch up on many of them. If I happen to miss you, please know that I read every single one and LOVE hearing from you. I cherish every word.**

**Finally, a quick thank you to a couple of people – TLammy for nominating me for a Sunflower Award and to Ro Nordmann for creating a beautiful banner for this story. I am honored that you think that much of this little tale. And my sincerest thanks to those of you who have been rec'ing this story to others. I am stunned by your kindness.**

**Okay, I'm done. Let's hear from Bella…..**

BPOV

Night had turned to morning. I knew it had occurred for I felt the warmth of the sunlight streaming through the windows. Morning was the only time that sunlight shone on the eastward facing windows of our bedroom and on those rare winter days that there were no clouds, it was a joyful warmth to wake to. However, this morning even the sun could not stop the chill I felt as I slid my hand across the empty bed. The linens were cold to the touch. They did not hold Edward's warmth as they usually did in the morning hours when we woke. It confirmed my fears… he had not returned to me.

Lifting my head to stare at the empty space he should have occupied as though he would mysteriously appear before me, I heard the distinct sound of a book snapping shut. Turning my face toward the sound, I was met by Edward's weary gaze. The relief I felt was immediate as I took in his appearance. He was clean shaven and dressed for the day. He did not appear well rested, but I knew he had been here for some time. I wondered when he had returned.

"You came back to me." My words were but a whisper.

"I cannot be without you, Bella." He rose and crossed the room, sitting beside me on the bed.

I wondered if he had any idea of the power of those very words. It was the mere memory of them, spoken on Christmas, that had given me the courage to tell him all that had occurred yesterday. I simply spoke the truth in response. "I cannot be without you either, Edward." I sat up and adjusted the quilts as I gathered the courage to voice my hurt. "But you left me alone. I needed your strength and comfort and you left me."

He dropped his eyes to the floor as he took in my words. When he finally met my eyes, his were full of pain and remorse. "I am ashamed of my actions last evening, Bella. I can only beg your forgiveness once again for my failings. It was my lack of planning that left you here alone and vulnerable to Smith's attack. It was also my lack of consideration for your needs that allowed me to leave you last evening after your explanation. Please know that it had nothing to do with you. It was my fear for my lack of ability to control my anger. I had no wish to subject you to my rage at Smith's threats and did not consider that it might cause you to be grieved. I can only offer that I will certainly learn from my mistake and will strive to learn what sort of husband you need and fulfill that role to the best of my ability."

I sat in quiet contemplation for a moment as I pondered his words. After a moment, I looked back at his anxious face and needed to put some distance between us to think clearly. Pushing the quilts away, I moved to rise from the bed, stretching my poor stressed muscles.

"I feel as though I were battered in my sleep. I am certain I will recover with some tea by the fire."

Standing and offering his hand to me, he smiled a wide smile and said, "Come, I have some rather decadent pastries for your breakfast and some news to share."

Taking his hand, we settled ourselves before the fire and I chose a pastry with jam and some fruit while Edward prepared our tea. When he finished, he set a cup in front of me and softly called my name. Glancing up at him, I followed his gaze to the ring he had placed on my finger. He studied it for a moment as he gathered his thoughts. When he finally spoke, it was with quiet intensity.

"Isabella, can you find it in your heart to forgive me? I fear I will go mad without your response."

Lifting his hand from it's place on the table, I brought it to my lips and placed a kiss to his palm before holding it between my own two hands and lifting my eyes to meet his.

"I was all but certain that your anger was not directed at me. But I must admit, Edward, that it did grieve me terribly when you left. I understand why you left, but I need you to understand my feelings as well."

The pain in his eyes was undeniable. I almost wished I could rescind my words and offer him immediate forgiveness. However, it was the security and love I found in my life with him that caused me to speak with such boldness and conviction. I had no fear that he would repeat the behavior.

Lifting his eyes to mine, the intensity was overwhelming as he spoke. "How are we to proceed, then, Bella? Can you offer forgiveness?"

"Of course you are forgiven. I fear we will both make many mistakes in our life together, but I will always forgive your contrite heart. I love you, Edward."

"As I love you, my Bella." Taking my hand in his own, we finished our breakfast in silence, enjoying the warmth of the fire and the security I felt. It was the first time I could remember in a long while that I did not feel the urge to run, to protect my self, my heart.

Finishing my tea, I placed my cup on the small table before me and stood. Edward watched me with curiosity as I stepped around the table and lowered myself gracefully into his lap. He immediately wrapped his arms around me, drawing me against his chest and tucking my head under his chin. We sat quietly this way for some time before there was a soft knock at the door. At Edward's invitation, the door opened and Jasper stepped into the room. I moved to lift myself, only to find it impossible as Edward tightened his arms around me as he nodded at Jasper's inquiring gaze.

"She is well, Jasper. What news have you?"

"I have sent for the tenants in question. I have asked Mrs. Cope to prepare a mid-day meal for them and we will have our answers before this day is finished. It is imperative that you are present for this meeting as they need to see you firmly seated as the master of the estate. Will you be available to attend?"

"Absolutely. I will have Isabella attend as well. She need only be available by sight as she will surely invoke their sympathies as Mr. Swan's daughter. It is a certainty that once they are presented with the truth regarding Mr. Smith's theft and his attempt at the ruination of the estate, they will align themselves with honesty and integrity. Otherwise, they will find themselves out of a home as I will not abide thievery in any form."

"I will arrange it. Alice will be unavailable today as she is feeling poorly. I have encouraged her to rest in her bed, although, I feel certain she would enjoy a visit from her dear sister today."

I smiled at his invitation. "Thank you, Jasper. I would very much like to spend some time with Alice today."

"I will take my leave of you, then." Nodding once, he turned and was gone from the room quickly. Lifting my head, I placed my fingers against Edward's jaw, gently turning his face toward mine. Smiling softly, he pressed a tender kiss to my lips as his hand came up to cup my cheek. Tilting his head ever so slightly, his lips became more insistent as the kiss became more urgent. As always, my body responded to his touch and a soft moan escaped me before I could contain it. Sliding his hand into my hair, he tightened his hold around my body as his mouth left mine, but trailed warm, wet kisses along my jaw and throat before pressing a final kiss into the curve of my neck and resting his head against my shoulder. After a moment, he lifted his head to meet my eyes. His voice was rough and low as he spoke.

"You are too tempting, love. We have matters to discuss and I find myself unable to form a coherent thought with you so close, yet I am equally unable to relinquish you to even a nearby chair." Closing his eyes, he drew in a ragged breath before finally opening his eyes with a tender gaze. "Are you truly well, my Bella?"

"I am well, just a bit worried. Have you information that might set my mind at ease?"

"I have. Come, let me prepare more tea for you and I will tell you the whole of it." Pushing me gently to stand from his lap, Edward poured more tea for both of us as I took my previous seat across from him. He did not hesitate once I was seated, but immediately began to explain how the events of the morning had unfolded.

"When I returned last night, Jasper had already prepared letters and awaited my approval to send them to the authorities. Justice Clearwater has affixed his signature to the charges leveled against Mr. Smith. However, Tanya has eluded us as of yet. Jasper has assured me that he has competent men searching for her and we must wait for the opportune moment. I believe you have already heard the intent concerning the farmers. I have also instructed Jasper to provide for increased protection for your father until this matter is settled."

Watching him speak with confidence and conviction regarding the arrangements he and Jasper had made in only a few hours was comforting, but I could not deny my feelings and I was certain he could read them on my face. It was only a moment before he questioned me.

"What is it, Bella? What is troubling you?"

"I am scared." I felt small and vulnerable admitting it to him and yet I could not deny it was how I felt. Reaching across the table and taking my hand firmly, his gaze was full of fire as he spoke.

"I will not allow any harm to come to you, Isabella. I must ask you to trust me once more. I will make certain that you are secure and safe and you will have no need to worry." Nodding at his confident words, I watched as his eyes filled with excitement. "Bella, let us travel until this is done. You should have enjoyed a grand tour and there is much of the world you have yet to see. Where can I take you? What adventure do you wish?"

"I cannot leave my father, Edward. Not now. He may not… he will…" I could not bring myself to say it, but there was no need. Edward looked stricken at my words and quickly addressed my concerns.

"Forgive me, Bella. I did not think. Of course you cannot go now. It was only a thought to distract you and keep you from any possibility of harm. It was careless of me to not consider your father's health."

"I understand and there is nothing to forgive. How can I fault you for wanting to protect me?"

Shaking his head, he smiled softly. "My sweet girl. Truthfully, it matters not, for this very morning, James Smith has been remanded into the custody of the local authorities. He will remain so until such time as evidence is presented against him publicly and he is convicted of his crimes. Bella, he can do you no harm. You are safe, sweetheart."

His words, meant to bring me comfort, caused my fear to increase. I fought hard against the tears that stung my eyes as I considered what this meant for his safety.

"Edward, I did not expect that he would know so quickly. He can have no doubt now that I have told you of his intentions and I fear for you."

"He cannot harm us. He will not have the opportunity and I have no intention of leaving you exposed to any danger. Please calm yourself, Bella and trust me to learn from my mistakes and keep you safe."

"I trust you. I cannot help my fear, but I trust you with my life."

His smile was blinding. Reaching for my other hand, he pulled me to my feet and around the table between us so that I was wrapped in his arms. After a playful kiss, he released me and gestured toward the wardrobe. "You should dress and prepare for the day. We have much to do. We are to have guests tomorrow."

"Guests? I was not aware you had issued an invitation. Who are we expecting?"

"Emma. And her parents, of course. But I was certain that you considered her the more valuable of the three."

I could not contain my joy. I had come to dearly love that little girl and very much looked forward to her visit.

* * * A H R * * *

The rest of the morning passed in a flurry of activity. The staff prepared Emmett and Rosalie's rooms as well as Emma's. I was thrilled to be able to show her the progress that had been made on the gardens and instructed the staff to make some final preparations there as well. I sat with Alice for a bit while she enjoyed her tea and then allowed her to rest for a while as I attended to Edward in his study, preparing for the meeting with the farmers from the east fields and a few of the southern fields as well.

When Tyler had informed us of the assembling of the tenants, we made our way to the formal dining room and were immediately confronted with not only the farmers, but many of their wives and children as well. I was stunned by the gathering. We certainly had not expected so many to attend. Jasper's voice was confident and loud as he called for the attention of those milling about the room.

"We are honored by your presence today and are thrilled that you have brought your families to visit as well. Our kitchen staff has prepared a meal and we have set it out in the ballroom. If you would be so kind as to join us there, we will offer you the information you have come seeking today."

As they slowly began to exit the room, many of the older farmers and their wives stopped to greet me, asking after my father as well. I had not realized so many of them were able to remain in their cottages after we left the estate. They were kind people for the most part and it was certainly a pleasant surprise to have their children in the manor.

Edward waited patiently as I greeted them, stepping forward to greet them as well when I made introductions. Only after all of the women had left the room did he offer his arm, which I took immediately, and led me into the ballroom where they were assembled and were already beginning to enjoy their meals.

After a few minutes of enthusiastic conversation, my eyes were drawn to a young woman in the corner. She was attempting to feed a young boy while cradling a tiny infant in her arms. She seemed a bit overwhelmed and I could not help but offer her my assistance.

"Pardon me, I am Isabella. Perhaps I could be of assistance?" Her eyes shot up to mine and she immediately held out the infant to me.

"Would you kindly hold him? I fear this one may have a tantrum if he is not fed quickly."

Taking the baby from her, I inquired as to their names.

"This is Liam. And the wee one there is Jackson. Thank you ma'am, I find it difficult to manage sometimes with them so little. I am Jessica and my husband, Michael has a farm on the southern edge of the estate. Michael's father farmed the same land when he was a boy. He says your Pa was a kind man and looked out for the men who worked his land."

"Thank you. I am glad to know that your husband chose to make a home here. It is good to meet you."

We chatted for a bit as she fed Liam and I was glad to cuddle the precious boy in my arms. Glancing around the room, I caught Edward staring at me with an odd expression on his face. He dropped his eyes to look at the babe in my arms before once again meeting my gaze. After a moment, a wide, sweet smile graced his face. He shook his head and turned to engage in the conversation around him. Once Jessica was finished with her meal, little Jackson was beginning to fuss as she took him from my arms.

I began once again to make my way around the room when I felt Edward's hand take mine and pull me near him.

"We are about to begin. Will you stand with me?" Nodding my assent, he led me to the middle of the room where he could be heard and seen clearly. He cleared his throat and began to speak.

"Gentlemen, Ladies, I have asked you here today to offer you my loyalty and to ask for yours in return. It has come to my attention that you have been offered an alliance by James Smith. Before we address his offer, I must inform you of his arrest on the charge of theft." The room was silent as Edward paused and glanced at me. Taking my hand, he continued, "He is also facing additional charges. He found my wife alone in the manor and threatened her well being as well as my own if she refused to aid him in his attempt to gain this estate."

Over the next few minutes, Edward continued to describe Smith's many crimes and provided documentation as to his theft of estate funds. Many were enraged at the information while others were saddened at the plight of the Swan household. A few were indifferent as they weighed their options. By the end of the meeting, the farmers had pledged their loyalty to Edward and he in turn had agreed to meet with them after the spring planting to renegotiate the income division between the farmers and the estate. As they departed from the manor, I was stunned by the number of children residing at Collingsworth.

"Isabella? Are you well?" I turned to find Edward watching me with no small amount of concern.

"I did not realize how many children there are. Have they enough income to support their families?"

"The income for tenants at Collingsworth is adequate, and even a bit generous for an estate this size. However, the income of the entire estate is substantial and I would be remiss if I did not offer the credit for that wealth to the farmers. I have every intention of adjusting the income division to benefit the tenants. Is there something in particular that troubles you regarding the children?"

I did not know how to answer him. I had not spared much though for how the tenants lived prior to our eviction from the estate. Only now, after I had lived their lives did I realize the weight of their burden. They had only the life they lived to offer their children. There was no aspiration to be more because there was no income to provide for it. The children were left uneducated and simply inherited the management of the farm from their parents. I suddenly realized what they were lacking.

"Edward, I wish to offer those children what you have offered me… hope."

His smile was blinding. "How is it you wish to accomplish this, my Bella?"

"I do not know, but I will think of it. May I have your support, husband?"

Pulling me into his arms, Edward gazed into my eyes as he spoke. "I will give you my unwavering support, love. Anything you desire."

"Thank you." I rested my cheek against his chest as he held me. After only a few moments, I yawned and relaxed against him. Immediately I felt his strong arms sweep under my knees and lift me from the floor. "Edward, what are you doing?"

He laughed softly at my surprise. "I am taking you to our room, Bella. You are exhausted. After the events of yesterday, following you illness, you desperately need to rest."

Arriving quickly in our rooms, Edward placed me on the bed and removed my shoes. Once finished, he sat on the edge of the bed as I drifted to sleep.

* * * A H R * * *

It was only a couple of hours later that I woke to an empty room. It was not surprising as I knew that Edward had neglected some of the estate business to spend more time with me over the last few days. I feared that in the wake of the confrontation with James Smith, his concern for my well being would cause him to lose more time that should be spent on estate affairs. It was a luxury he could not afford as the time for spring planting was drawing closer. Perhaps I could find some way to assist him in his work so that he would not worry and could be more productive when it was necessary.

Rising from the bed, I made my way toward the kitchen. I had eaten very little at the mid-day and found that I woke nearly famished. Nearing Edward's study, I heard shouting and as I peered in the door, cringed as a book went soaring from Edward's hand into the wall. Pushing the door opened, I took a hesitant step into the room.

"Edward?" My voice was quiet even to my own ears. I had never seen him this angry and I must admit, I was fearful of it's meaning. His eyes shot up to mine and I immediately saw the fear in them. "What is it? What has happened?"

Walking over to me, he grabbed my arms and yanked my body against his own, his arms holding me so tightly that I could hardly take in a breath. The anger and fear rolling off of him in waves caused me to be on full alert. Glancing around the room as much as I was able, I noticed Jasper and Justice Clearwater were standing near the hearth, both with grim faces as they looked away, clearly uncomfortable with such a public display.

Pushing against his chest, I raised my eyes to Edward's, waiting for an explanation. It was Justice Clearwater who finally spoke.

"Miss Sw – Forgive me, Mrs. Cullen, how are you?"

"I will be much better, sir, when I am informed of the cause of my husband's distress."

"I fear it is my fault. I arranged for the transfer of Mr. Smith to a more secure location. It would seem that Smith had been well connected as the carriage which transported him was ambushed. Their sole intent, it would seem, was the escape of our captive. I am sorry, Mrs. Cullen. He is nowhere to be found. We believe he has fled the county and all the local and regional authorities have been notified."

Grasping my face in his hands, Edward brought my eyes back to his as he spoke. "I will keep you safe, Bella. You will not be alone, even for a moment and the manor will remain secure. I will not rest until he has been captured and brought to justice."

Jasper was quick to inform me of precautions that had already been taken. "Isabella, we have secured every entrance and window in the manor. Justice Clearwater has brought with him several trained men who will remain at the estate for as long as need be. Their sole purpose being to protect Collingsworth's inhabitants."

Edward led me over to a nearby chair and pressed me to sit. He stood beside me, keeping a firm grip on my hand as he continued to ask questions of Justice Clearwater. Once all details were disclosed, Jasper rode back into town with the Justice to sign some paperwork concerning the charges and the room was silent for some time as Edward and I just sat quietly. It was only the rumbling of my empty stomach that brought a slight chuckle from Edward.

"I have neglected to feed you, love. Come, let us find Mrs. Cope and see what she has prepared." Pulling me to stand, he quickly wrapped his arms around me once again. "I cannot even consider having you in harm's way, Bella. I would not survive it if something happened to you. Please, please inform me immediately of any irregularities in the household and do not wander outside without a guard. Promise me."

As I began to nod my agreement, he shook his head. "No. Say it aloud, Bella."

"I will do as you ask. I promise."

"Thank you." His words were but a breathless whisper as he placed a gentle kiss to my forehead. Releasing me and taking my hand in his, we walked toward the kitchen.

* * * A H R * * *

After a quiet supper together at the table in the kitchen near the hearth, we retired to our room. Once dressed for bed, we sat together in his chair by the fire as he read from his book of sonnets. I thought surely I would drift to slumber at the gentle lilt of his smooth, deep voice. But sleep did not come and soon we were lying in bed together, sharing the occasional soft kiss and caress as we spoke softly.

"Tell me of places you have seen, Edward. How much of the world is no longer a mystery to you?"

"I have seen most of England. I believe you would love Italy and France, Bella. They are truly beautiful lands. I wish to show you so much of the world. To see your face glow with joy as you make new discoveries and hear strange languages. We will see it all, love. Where shall we go first? Ireland? France? Spain?"

He brought my hand to his mouth and gently kissed my palm before placing it against his chest. Smiling widely at his enthusiasm, I knew he meant every word.

"I am certain anywhere with you will be a grand adventure."

Feeling a low rumble under my hand resting on his chest, I was startled as it turned into a sort of growl and he quickly pushed me onto my back, pressing his weight on me as he spoke. "The grandest of adventures is to be found right now, right here in this bed."

Once again, I knew he meant every word.


	29. Time and Plans

**Don't own it. Wish I did. I do own a precious new puppy!**

**I will never be able to express my appreciation for the kind words and encouragement you have offered. Thank you so much!**

**So… Moving forward a bit….**

BPOV

The manor was in a flurry of activity as preparations were made for the morning meal as well as the arrival of our guests. If I were honest, I was more than a bit excited at the prospect of seeing Emma today. I had missed her and looked forward to the few days we would have to spend together before she left with her parents for the visit with her grandparents.

Edward had risen early to see to some accounts in his study before breakfast. He had encouraged me to rest this morning as it had been the early hours of the morning before we found sleep in each others arms. As I made my way through the conservatory to the smaller, more intimate dining room that we had begun to use, I found Alice and Jasper overlooking the gardens. Alice turned to greet me with a smile.

"Isabella, the gardens are stunning. I can hardly wait for the roses to bloom. I will not wish to leave."

"Are you leaving? I suppose you must eventually go, but I had not considered it." I was certain the panic I felt at the thought of them leaving was evident in my voice. It was Jasper who answered calmly.

"We are not leaving for some time, Isabella. It is something we will discuss once Edward joins us. Come, our meal will be cold. We can talk over tea."

We settled ourselves around the smaller table and as we began our meal, my husband entered the room and caught my eye. He was particularly handsome this morning as he strode across the room to stoke the fire. I watched as he knelt and placed a small log into the blaze, enjoying the ripple of muscle across his shoulders and allowing my eyes to drift lower to follow the tightness of his backside as he rose to stand. It was Alice's giggle that broke my concentration and as I turned my eyes toward her I knew my blatant appraisal of Edward's assets had not escaped her notice. As I felt the heat rise in my cheeks, Jasper chuckled as well. Glancing at Edward as he walked toward me, I knew he was aware of my folly as well when I saw the smirk and wink he so casually offered. When he reached my chair he leaned in close, kissing my cheek and whispering softly, "Careful Mrs. Cullen, or I shall be persuaded that you are having impure thoughts toward me."

"Perhaps it is not impure thoughts, but rather a desire for a grand adventure with my husband. Where shall we go next?" My words were whispered, but were obviously loud enough to be heard by Jasper and Alice as they both laughed as Edward's mouth hung agape at my boldness. Shaking his head and smiling smugly as he sat down beside me, he draped his napkin across his lap before responding.

"Have no fear, wife, I have plans for a great number of adventures in a great number of places." My blush was immediate as I ducked my head, unable to keep from smiling not only at the laughter of my husband, Jasper and Alice, but also at the promise held in his words.

The remainder of our breakfast passed in pleasant conversation and laughter which continued for a while as we retired to the sitting room. Alice and I took up some unfinished needlework as the men began to inform us of some decisions that had been made in the course of the morning.

"Bella, I have asked Jasper and Alice to stay here with us for the immediate future. I find that I need Jasper's assistance with matters concerning the estate as well as his invaluable services in dealing with the outcome of Smith's crimes."

Nodding in agreement, Jasper met Alice's gaze as he spoke gently. "I believe it would be best to have you settled here for the duration of your confinement, darling. I know it has been a difficult time for you and I do not wish to travel only to afford you more discomfort." Alice smiled softly at him, nodding once before looking back at her embroidery. I found myself in awe of the gentleness of their relationship and her trust in him to do his best to care for her.

I trusted Edward to care for me, to provide for me and to love me, but found it difficult to trust myself to allow him to do it. I had relied upon myself for so long that it was now a struggle to relinquish that care to someone else, even if he did love me beyond reason. I suppose it was my fear that I could lose him just as I lost nearly everything I held dear once before. Understanding now what my fear was, I realized what I wanted more than anything. I wanted to be unconcerned once again about my future. I wanted to trust the people I loved to love me in return. I wanted to trust my husband to care for me as Jasper does for Alice.

I want what Alice possesses.

"My embroidery?" Alice's voice was full of her confusion. My eyes widened at the realization that I spoke those words aloud. Turning my head toward Edward, I found him gazing at me quizzically. I opened my mouth to speak but having no explanation for my unintentionally voiced thoughts, I simply sighed and remained silent.

"Isabella?" I looked up and met Jasper's eyes in response to his voice. "I was explaining to Alice that my presence here would also help with security. We intend to ask Emmett and Rosalie to stay once they return from her parent's estate. Of course, we will only proceed if you are agreeable."

Clearing my thoughts, I nodded as I responded to this information. "Of course. I am thrilled to have you all stay as long as you wish."

Reaching over and grasping my hand, Alice gave a firm squeeze as she caught my eyes. "Thank you, Isabella. I believe I would be heartbroken to leave you so soon." Turning toward Jasper, she held her hand out to him as she smiled widely. "Now, come lift me out of this cushion. Your child is causing me discomfort and I should like to rest for a while."

"As you command, sweet Alice." Taking her hand, Jasper lifted her from the chair and placed her hand in the crook of his arm as he turned to face me. "If you will excuse us, we will rejoin you when Emmett arrives. Have a pleasant morning." Escorting her from the room, he left us in the silence as he closed the door behind them. It was only a moment before Edward spoke.

"Would you rather that Jasper and Alice depart as planned?"

"Of course not. Why would you ask such a thing?"

"It seems as though you are unhappy with our plans. Forgive me if I have overstepped. I should have inquired as to your wishes before speaking with Jasper."

"Edward, I am not unhappy. The manor is certainly large enough that several families could occupy it comfortably. It pleases me greatly to have Alice near. She is what I always assumed a sister would be, should I have had one."

"Then I am at a loss for I do not understand your reaction, love. Tell me so that I may assist you." Looking into his eyes, I saw nothing but sincerity and concern. I regretted causing him to worry and knew that it would be difficult to explain to him my fear. Shifting slightly, I slid aside, offering him the seat beside me. Never taking his eyes from mine, he sat beside me, turning so that he could see me clearly.

Taking in a deep breath, I tugged and pulled at the fabric of my skirts as I tried to order my thoughts.

"You are nervous and fearful." My eyes shot up to meet his at the validity of his words.

"How can you discern that?" His hands covered mine, gently pulling my fingers open and releasing the fabric from them. Holding them open, he lifted them to his lips, placing a kiss on each of my palms before meeting my eyes and smiling.

"You worry your poor innocent clothing to threads when you fret. I noticed it the day we were married. I thought surely your skirts would have holes in them from the constant pulling in the carriage ride to the estate."

"I did not realize."

"I know. It is one of a hundred little things I know about you. You hold your breath when you experience physical discomfort. You furrow your brow and stare at the floor when you are confused." He chuckled a bit and pulled at my earlobe before continuing, "Your ears turn a vivid crimson when you are angry."

His voice lowered as he leaned in close, pressing his lips gently to the corner of my mouth and speaking against it. "Your chin lowers and your eyes darken when you desire me." Tilting his head slightly, he kissed me passionately, nipping my lower lip with his teeth as he pulled away. "You bite your lip in the moment just before you are lost to pleasure in my arms."

"Edward!" His name was but a shocked gasp at his speaking so freely of such moments.

"It is true and it is my great joy to know that it is a secret that only I will ever know. I simply want you to comprehend that I know you intimately, Bella. Perhaps, at times, I understand your body more than you do. What I cannot know, love, is your mind and your heart. They are a deep mystery to me that I long to understand. Those, however, you must share with me. You must trust me enough to tell me of your desires, your dreams, your fears and longings." Bringing his hands to my face, his thumbs stroked over my cheeks as he held my eyes and spoke. "Now, my sweet wife, tell me what has you fretful."

His tender touch and piercing gaze were overwhelming, but when bound to his passionately spoken words, I had no choice but to tell him my fears.

"I want what Alice and Jasper share. I wish to be carefree in my love for you, but I am not. I cannot overcome the fear that I will lose you. That I will lose your family, who I have come to consider my own. I cannot determine how to rid myself of the fear that I will lose all that is precious to me."

I was certain I was making a poor representation of my thoughts, but Edward only watched my face, contemplating his response. Perhaps he had no answer to my mind's feeble rambling. Finally he pulled his gaze from mine, staring down at our joined hands as his brow furrowed. After a moment, he brought his eyes back to mine.

"Only time will rid you of that fear, my Bella. Your experience has taught you to expect loss, yet I have seen the joy come back to your face. I have watched you begin to dream again, to be so filled with hope that it overflows into the lives of farmer's children. I must believe that as hope and joy continue to grow in your heart, there will be no room for the fear."

After a moments contemplation, I could not doubt the truth of his words. Time would be the healing balm for my heart and would calm the fears that I constantly lived with. Pressing myself against him, I felt his strong arms come around me, holding me close.

"We will take tomorrow as it comes, my Bella. We have today and all the hope it holds."

* * * A H R * * *

Time passed quickly and it seemed that spring was in full bloom. The planting was well underway and the gardens were perfectly manicured and were showing evidence of color.

Emmett, Rosalie and Emma had arrived and after spending several days had departed for her parents estate. It seemed that they were farther along in age and having no other children, it was their desire that Emmett should become their heir. They would be spending the spring planting season at the estate to become familiar with the farmers and the community before returning to Collingsworth for an extended stay.

In keeping with spring, Alice was in full bloom as well. She was still a few weeks from birth, but considering her slight size, we all were of the mind that she would deliver early. She now had a difficult time managing the stairs and was content to be confined to her rooms upstairs. I spent much of my time with her there, sewing tiny gowns and bonnets and embroidering soft quilts in eager anticipation of the pending arrival.

As the weather had improved, we made daily visits to my father's cottage. His health had not improved, not did we expect it to. He simply existed in some form of suspended life, not recognizing any persons or the passing of time. Edward would always accompany me and we would share events occurring at the estate or plans we were making to travel in the summer. Many days were spent reading from his favorite passages as he remained unresponsive. I could only hope that somewhere deep inside he could still recognize my voice or at least the words that he had loved so much. The carriage ride home was always spent in silence as Edward held me close to his side, providing as much comfort at he could.

True to his word, Edward never left us unattended. If he was to be absent from the estate, Jasper would remain or would engage the guard provided by Justice Clearwater to stand post until they returned. My worries and fears were much lessened and I had learned to enjoy the moments as they arrived rather than worry about how long they would endure. Also in keeping with his promise, Edward and I had become much more adventurous as well. It would seem that time did not diminish our desire for one another, but increased it at an astounding rate. We had learned to be careful, making certain doors were locked as we had endured days of teasing after Jasper had unknowingly entered a room we occupied.

All of our time was not spent in physical pursuits, however, as I had insisted on tending the gardens myself once the planting had occurred. Edward would accompany me for hours as I carefully pruned and nurtured the tender plants. I learned much about him in those hours as we shared our lives with one another. We also shared our common hopes for travel in the months ahead.

It seemed the only impediment to our happiness was James Smith. As the weeks passed, he remained at large as there had been no sightings of him or confirmation of his whereabouts. Tanya Denali had also disappeared and was assumed to be in his company. Her reputation had been ruined and her family devastated. I felt great compassion for Garrett and Kate as none of what had transpired had been their choosing, yet they felt the pain of it. I had simply chosen to cling to Edward's words and cling to the hope that today would provide.

Today, Edward and I had been visiting the tenants as most of them had completed the planting and there were several new tenants on the estate. Edward had rebalanced the profit percentages and had offered a greater income to all of the farmers and while most of them were overwhelmed at his exceeding generosity, a few were still greedily holding to Smith's offer in an effort to acquire more income. They had quickly found themselves without any income or homes as they were immediately evicted. While we had both been saddened by the turn of events, we knew it was necessary for the security of the estate.

As Edward spent time with the farmers, I had visited with their wives and children, learning more about the families that occupied our property. It was during one of these visits that I realized how I wanted to help them. Upon our arrival at the manor, I asked Edward for the use of his study where I spent the next several hours documenting my plan. It was only when Edward entered the room to inform me that the evening meal was upon us that I realized how intensely focused I was that I had not known how late it had become.

"I am sorry, Edward. It was not my intention to neglect you and our household today."

Smiling indulgently as he walked toward the desk where I was seated, he offered his hand. "You are passionately engaged. I have enjoyed the spark of life in your eyes today, my Bella. I must admit, however, that I am wildly curious. How long must I wait to hear of these great plans?"

"Will you sit with me this evening and allow me to share them with you?"

"I shall look forward to it. Come now, our meal is ready." Taking the hand he offered, I stood and was immediately pulled into his arms as his lips consumed mine in a powerful kiss. Pulling away only for the need of breath, his eyes were dark as they met mine. "Have you any idea what you do to me? I have observed your passionate pursuits from afar this afternoon and have hardly been able to keep my distance. The desire it creates in me is nearly uncontrollable, my Bella. I will enjoy learning of your plans, but be prepared, wife, that it will hold consequences."

"And will they be pleasurable consequences, husband?"

"You can be assured that they will be pleasurable and they will be many." I shivered involuntarily at the promise in his words as he chuckled and turned us toward the door. "Let us enjoy our meal together. We will be glad of the nourishment later, of that I am certain."

* * * A H R * * *

"Alright, sweet girl, what have you been scheming?" Edward had stoked the fire and made certain the room was well lit before settling himself beside me on the sofa. I had spent that same span of time preparing my pages of written plans which I now held nervously in my hands. I had no need of them as I knew exactly what I needed to tell him but they offered some comfort as I worried about what he might think. Taking a deep breath, I lifted my eyes to his and hoped he would join me in my excitement.

"Edward, you must know how happy I am here, with you. As odd as it sounds, I am grateful for the events that occurred in my life that led you here to Collingsworth. Had we not lost our home, you would never have inherited it, would never have rescued me from my life without a hope or a future, and I would never have known this deep compassion for the families that inhabit our lands."

Nodding at my words, Edward responded. "As much as I regret the circumstances that you have lived through, I must admit that I would change nothing, were I even able."

"Then you must understand that if I am able, I desire to offer hope to these same families. For most of them, they live day to day wondering if they will have enough to eat or the resources to provide warmth through the winter. They have so little to offer their children, Edward. Were we able to break the circle of despair for them, their lives would improve substantially."

"And how do you propose to do this?"

"They receive no education as their parents cannot even read." Grasping his hands in mine, I implored him to understand. "Edward, think of the possibilities available to them if they were educated. I wish to provide that for them. If we provide a tutor and a place for them to assemble for lessons, the children would receive at least the most basic of instruction and the world they know will change. They grow into adults with opportunities for so much more."

"If there are no children willing to inherit the living from their fathers, who will work the land and supports the estate?" His question was not angry or derogatory in any way. Rather, he was contemplative, simply working through all possibilities.

"Edward, there are always men looking to provide for their families. If the current families leave the estate for better circumstances, then we will have opportunities to assist more as they come to us. Think of it, husband! They come here looking for a meager living and we can offer them a new life with the simple employ of a tutor!"

My excitement had gotten the best of me and I was standing before him, gesturing wildly with my hands as I spoke. As he sat unmoving on the sofa, gazing into the blazing hearth, I could not help but wonder if he now considered me mentally unstable. When he finally turned his head and met my eyes, his expression was indiscernible.

EPOV

My mind was spinning. Her plan was simple and yet could prove to be life altering to so many. In truth, I was ashamed that I had never considered anything like it on my own. However, as I pondered the possibility, I realized that I would never have considered it because I had never lived that life. I had been educated throughout my childhood and early adulthood. There was never a possibility that I would not have been given every opportunity to further my knowledge. And yet, I had never given thought to these families that would never have the ability to provide even the ability to read to their children. I had taken it for granted, as had my Bella. The glaring difference was that she intended to do something about this travesty. She had lived the life they live. She knew what it was to be hungry, to fear for her future and the future of one dependant on her. She felt their discomfort.

I could never deny her anything that she truly wanted, but in this she was not even asking for herself. It was her compassion that compelled her to seek something from me on the behalf of others. I determined I would do whatever I could to assist her.

"What is your plan to accomplish this, Bella?"

Sitting beside me once again, she smiled widely and her eyes shone with excitement. "It is truly a simple idea. I would like to offer one of the sitting rooms that we rarely use as a sort of classroom. We could find a tutor who would be willing to educate not one child, but several within this setting. Perhaps we could alternate the boys and the girls at separate times, allowing for the parents to still have their help on the farms."

She was suddenly quiet, watching me intently. As I waited for her to speak again, her hands began to twist her skirts as her eyes dropped to her lap. Immediately covering her hands with my own, I called her name softly. When she finally brought her eyes to mine, I could not keep my composure. Leaning forward, I pulled her toward me as I pressed my lips to hers. Her hands quickly came up to rest on my shoulders as she relaxed into the kiss. Pulling away from her sweet mouth to draw breath, I closed my eyes to regain some of my self control. Once I was certain I could restrain myself, I lifted her face in my hands.

"Your compassion and kindness knows no bounds, Isabella. I have known you to be a tenderhearted and gentle woman, but this day, you have revealed your wisdom and good sense to me as well. I am impressed by your plan and would very much like to have it implemented here at your discretion. Please allow me to bring your written notes to Jasper so that we may discern the best course of action to bring it about. I give you my word that it will be considered at utmost priority. Will you agree?"

"Yes! Thank you, Edward!" Without warning or restraint, she flung herself into me, causing us both to collapse onto the sofa. Having barely caught her to keep her from falling to the floor, I tightened my arms around her body, pressing her firmly against my own. She could have no doubt now of the effect of her passion and excitement. My body had responded some time ago and was the definite cause of my poor control in this moment.

Using my lips and tongue to explore her mouth, jaw, neck and any available exposed skin, I pulled at her dress, causing it to shred in my hands. Pulling back to regard me with wide, surprised eyes, she paused only for a moment before grasping my hair and pulling my lips back to hers, consuming my mouth with her own.

Holding my weight above her, I shifted so that one of my legs was between hers, and using my knee, I pushed her legs apart and continued to press forward and upward until her left leg was bent and she immediately wrapped it around my hip. Lowering my body, I pressed myself against her, eliciting a moan that shot straight to my core. Pulling her mouth from mine, she fought for breath as she began to beg.

"Please… please, Edward…."

"It cannot be comfortable here, love. Let me take you to our bed." As I moved to lift my body, she immediately wrapped her other leg around me and locked her ankles. Grasping my shirt, she pulled until she could once again reach my lips.

"Here, husband. I need you here, right now. Please."

I could deny her nothing. It took only seconds for me to free us of enough clothing that our bodies could join. She cried out as I pressed into her, burying her face against my neck as her hands grasped my shoulders. The moment was powerful and I could feel my arms shaking with the effort it took to keep myself from thrusting furiously into her small body. However, my passion-filled wife would have none of it. Grasping my face in her hands, she held my eyes as she spoke.

"I see the fire in your eyes, husband. Let me feel you. Please."

Her simple words shredded what little control remained. With a groan, I slid my arms under her body, wrapping my hands over her shoulders to anchor her to me as I began to thrust in earnest. She tightened her legs around me as her breaths came quickly. She called my name in a breathless whisper as she began to shake. Seconds later, her back arched and she cried out as I felt her body grip mine. Pressing my lips to her jaw and kissing up to her ear, I nipped at her earlobe, sucking hard as I shifted my body to gain more leverage.

Lifting my head, I caught her eyes as I continued thrusting and pressing my body to hers. Her hair was damp and curling around her face and she was flushed from her pleasure. She was beautiful. I could feel my body coiling for release and knew it would be quick. Straining to keep her eyes from closing, Bella began to once again call my name, this time in a shout rather than hushed whispers. When her teeth clamped down on her plump bottom lip, I could no longer control my body. Shuddering, I felt her body once again spasm around mine as I fell into bliss.

It was moments, or perhaps hours later, when my sweet wife pressed her hands against my limp form that had fallen atop her body.

"Edward? Edward, the room is growing cold and I am… damp."

Lifting myself, I sat back on my heels and adjusted my clothing as she did the same. It was only after I stood and reached for her hand that I felt the pangs of guilt for what had occurred.

"Bella, please forgive me. I should never have treated you with such – "

"Do not regret this, Edward." Her face was vulnerable and pleading as she spoke. "Please. I do not regret it. I… to feel the desire and passion you have for me…."

Stepping forward and pressing a soft kiss to her lips I whispered my assurance. "I do not regret it, my Bella. I only regret any discomfort you may have as a result."

She smiled shyly as she looked away. "I do not mind the discomfort when it is a result of our shared passion. I love you."

"As I love you, my Bella."

* * * A H R * * *

My sweet wife was exhausted and slept well throughout the night. She had been plagued with nightmares and restless sleep for weeks following the attack by Smith. She would become tense and nervous as evening approached, finding sleep only after hours of lying awake filled with worry. I learned quickly that she found comfort in my arms and had since made it a point to always retire with her, holding her close as she settled in for the night. At times, I would rise for a few more hours once she slept, but I always remained close to offer comfort when it was needed.

Truthfully we were both exhausted from our visits yesterday as well as our evening activities. When I woke this morning, I began to read through the plans she had penned yesterday. They were well thought out and would certainly be profitable for the families who chose to participate. I hoped, for her sake, it was well received by the tenants.

She had changed so much in the last few months. No longer was she the timid, fearful girl who hid in her surroundings to get by. Now my wife was a confident, self assured woman who not only ran our home with grace and kindness, but also strove to offer a better life to those who were willing to earn it. I truly had married above my station, whether she recognized it or not.

I was brought from my thoughts by a soft knock on the door. Glancing over at my Bella, tucked snugly in our bed, I knew she had not been disturbed by the sound. Placing the stack of papers on the table beside me, I rose and walked the short distance to the door, opening it to find Tyler waiting in the hallway.

"Good morning, Tyler. Can I assume all is well?"

"Good morning, sir. I am afraid I have come with some news that requires your attention."

Stepping into the hallway, I closed the door behind me before gesturing toward Tyler, indicating that he should continue.

"Sir, a messenger arrived early this morning carrying a letter from the gentleman you employed to care for Mr. Swan. The letter states that Mr. Swan died peacefully in his sleep last night and they await your instructions as to how they should proceed."

"Thank you, Tyler. Would you have some tea sent up at your earliest convenience, please? Also, please inform Jasper as to the death of Mrs. Cullen's father as we will need his services as a solicitor."

"Very well, sir. Please express my condolences to Mrs. Cullen." At my nod, he turned and made his way back down the hall as I returned to our room. Isabella was still sleeping peacefully and I did not have the heart to wake her. She would wake to a world that was different than the one she knew last evening. She had no remaining blood relatives and I knew she would be vulnerable and saddened at the loss of her father. She was stronger now and I knew she would struggle, but would survive this loss and I was determined that she would find the support she needed in me.

Sitting in my chair by the fire, I situated myself comfortably and waited for the moment she would wake and I would share the news that would break her heart.


	30. Denial and Release

**Don't own anything, except my unhealthy obsession with Edward.**

**Seriously, you all are utterly amazing! Those of you who have rec'd this story are the kindest people. Thank you for sending others my way.**

**I am beyond thrilled to say that AHR has been nominated for fic of the week on The Lemonade Stand. Please head over there and vote. I would be beside myself if you would be so kind as to help me make the top 5. You can find it at tehlemonadestand dot blogspot dot com. Thank you in advance to those of you who vote for me. And a huge thanks to whoever it was that nominated me.**

**So…. It's late here, but I wanted to get this out to you. I didn't get to double check for mistakes, so I hope it meets my usual standard. As always, let me know what you think.**

EPOV

Dread. It was the overwhelming emotion present with me in the room as I watched my Bella begin to stir from her sleep. It was only a matter of minutes until she would rise and I would be forced to tell her of her father's death.

A soft knock informed me of Tyler's return with our tea. I bid him enter as I watched my wife's eyes open and drift around the room before finding me. A sweet smile graced her features as she greeted me. "Good morning, husband." Glancing over, she gave Tyler a shy smile as well. "Good morning, Tyler. It seems you have quite the timing when it comes to our morning tea."

"Good morning, ma'am." With a quick glance and nod in my direction, Tyler quickly excused himself from the room. I prepared a cup of tea for Bella, placing it on the table beside my chair before walking to her side. She was sitting upright in the bed and immediately took my hand, pulling me toward her. I bent to kiss her softly, cupping her cheek with my hand.

"You have left me in a cold bed, my love. I suppose I have no choice but to rise if I am to find warmth in your arms." She stood and turned her back to me as I wrapped her robe around her shoulders. Facing me once again, I pulled the front together, fastening the closure as she wrapped her arms around my waist. I could not help but wrap her in my embrace, holding her close and drawing strength from her pleasant mood. After a moment, I released her and grasped her hand in mine, leading her to sit in my chair by the fire. Pulling the footstool directly in front of her, I handed her the cup of tea before settling myself on the stool and lifting her feet to place them in my lap. She sipped her tea as I gently rubbed her feet, struggling to find the words I needed. I looked up when I felt her small hand on my cheek. Meeting her eyes, I saw her confusion and fear and knew I could delay this no longer. Taking her hands in mine, I steeled my resolve and took a deep breath.

"Sweetheart, I am so sorry, I –"

Before I could speak it, she knew. I could see in her eyes the exact moment that understanding dawned. Pulling her hands from mine and balling them into small fists, she formed the word on her lips, but it was so quiet that had I not been watching her face, I would not have heard it.

"Papa."

"He passed in his sleep, love. It was peaceful and he was without discomfort." I could not discern if she were hearing my words of if they were bringing her any ease. She simply stared into the fire, unseeing and unhearing. "Isabella? Bella, talk to me."

After a moment, her eyes snapped to mine and she rose from her seat. "I should wash and dress for the day. There is much to attend to. Decisions must be made, letters written and posted." She was quickly gathering her garments and I was at a loss. I had expected sorrow, tears, perhaps even anger. This efficient, guarded response was unnerving. Stepping in front of her, I stilled her hands with mine.

"Bella, look at me."

Bringing her eyes to mine, she responded, "I am fine, Edward. This was to be expected. I must see to arrangements and prepare the manor for those who wish to offer condolences. There will certainly be few of those as my father has been away from the world for some time. At any rate, we must be prepared. Would you allow me to use your study?"

Stunned, I stepped aside and let her pass. I was loathe to leave her alone, but perhaps that is what she needed. Turning away, I walked toward the door. I could hardly bring myself to take the handle, but I was at a loss as to what to do for her, save what she had asked of me.

"Bella? I will be in the study. Come down when you are ready and I will seek out Jasper to help us."

"Thank you, Edward." She called out to me from the water closet and I knew I had been dismissed. Making my way downstairs, I found Jasper in the study, already preparing documents for Mr. Swan's arrangements. Looking up as I entered the room, his greeting was one of concern for Bella.

"How is she? I assume you have informed her?"

"Yes. Although, she has responded in a very peculiar manner."

"How so?"

"There were no hysterics or even tears. She became very efficient, marking things that needed to be done. It was unnerving, Jasper. She was unfeeling in her response."

Jasper sighed and sat down in the chair behind the desk. "Edward, she is certainly in shock at what has occurred. All was well in her world last night as she retired to her bed, only to wake this morning to find that her only blood relative has died. Give her some time, but do not place yourself at a distance. It is a surety that she will falter at some point. She will need you desperately when that occurs."

Nodding in understanding, I gathered the documents that Bella would need to see and was surprised by her voice as she entered the room.

"Edward?"

Turning to offer her my hand, I took in her appearance. I had thought perhaps she would show some signs of distress. She did not. In fact, she seemed very focused and engaged in details that needed to be finalized. I was shaken. I had been prepared for her devastation and weeping. I had not been prepared for the denial of her grief.

As she stepped forward and grasped my hand, I noticed a slight tremble, only for a moment as she met my gaze. I quickly informed her of Jasper's involvement and the plans that awaited her approval.

"Jasper and I have prepared some directives that we thought might be acceptable to you." Handing her the paper, I waited while she looked it over. When she lifted her eyes, I continued. "It is a simple plan. Much of it has already occurred and we simply need your approval for the rest."

I had no need to inform her that her father's body had already been removed from the cottage and prepared for burial. The details were of dates and times for a wake and dispensation of the legal documents and personal effects.

"Did you prepare this?" Her expression gave nothing away as she awaited my answer.

"Yes. Jasper assisted me. I thought it might make this day somewhat less difficult for you."

"Thank you, Edward. It does ease my mind. These arrangements are fine. I would like to have him laid to rest beside my mother and for the event to be a private affair. Those wishing to pay their respects may do so at the wake. Is this acceptable to you?"

"Of course, love."

Nodding quickly, she briefly met my eyes as she excused herself from the room to see to preparations. Turning to Jasper, I met his eyes with a questioning gaze. Shaking his head, he responded, "It will be difficult, Edward, to be sure. She is keeping herself consumed for the moment. When she is empty handed, I fear she will be inconsolable."

That was my fear as well.

I kept a close watch over her for the remainder of the day as she saw to every detail concerning the wake and receiving of condolences that would occur the following day. When the day finally ended and we retired to our room for the night, she was quiet and simply stared out the window into the night. Unable to stand the separation, I pulled her back against my chest and wrapped my arms around her. Her body remained stiff and silent. After a moment, I pressed a kiss to her cheek and turned her toward the bed.

"Come, love, you must be exhausted. The warmth of the bed will do you well." Assisting her into the bed, I tucked her in securely before stoking the fire and turning down the oil lamps. Climbing into the bed beside her, I placed my arm around her waist and pulled her small body against mine. She did not respond, but simply lay limp, staring into the darkness. I kissed her forehead softly and spoke. "I love you, my Bella."

* * * A H R * * * 

"Mr. Cullen? Sir?" My eyes shot open at the sound of Tyler's voice. Instinct overtook me as I turned immediately to find Bella gone from our bed. Tyler stepped back as I rose quickly from the bed.

"Where is Mrs. Cullen?" I was pulling on my robe as he was holding our a candle. I took in his attire and knew something was amiss as he was in his nightclothes.

"Mrs. Cope woke me to retrieve you, sir. It seems Mrs. Cullen is in the kitchen and Mrs. Cope is concerned at her state. Please come, sir."

Following him down the stairs and through the dark house to the kitchen, I was nearly undone with worry for what I might find. Silently berating myself for sleeping through her departure from our bed, I hoped she had not caused or come to any harm.

When we arrived at the kitchen, Tyler opened the door and stepped aside so I could enter. I found Mrs. Cope just inside the door, staring silently into the poorly lit room. She turned her sad eyes on me as she spoke.

"I am sorry to wake you, sir. I could not convince her to return to bed. I though perhaps you might have some ability to comfort the poor girl."

Nodding once, I turned my eyes toward the opposite side of the room where Isabella was bent over a table, working furiously. Glancing over my shoulder at Tyler and Mrs. Cope, I assured them we would be fine.

"Thank you for watching over her. Please get some rest. I will care for her and see her to bed." They retreated silently from the room and I was left alone with my somewhat overwrought, exhausted wife. I approached her quietly, but with enough noise so as not to startle her by my sudden appearance. I need not have worried, however, as she was completely lost to her surroundings. Bent over the table, she was viciously kneading a large mound of dough. There were several others in various states of preparation on the table as well. It seemed she had been here for some time. Her hair was loose and hung down her back except where it clung to her perspiration dampened skin. Her eyes were wild as she worked at an angry pace.

The room was cold and dark as the fire had all but gone out and she worked by the light of one oil lamp. My exhausted mind registered the lack of a fire and I briefly wondered how she planned to bake the excessive amount of bread she was preparing. Assessing the circumstances, I knew it was imperative that I remove her from the room as her damp skin and clothing would be aided by the chill in the room to cause her to be ill. Resolved, I stepped toward her and placed my hand atop hers in an effort to gain her attention. She immediately pushed my hand away and continued her kneading.

"I have much to accomplish. Leave me be."

"Isabella, it is the middle of the night and it is cold in this room. Come, you need rest."

"No! How am I to care for those who come tomorrow if I cannot even provide bread?"

"Bella." I grasped her wrist gently in my hand and she jerked back in response, pushing me away once again.

"I said, Let me be!" She lifted the dough and slammed it back against the table for effect.

Placing myself between Bella and the table, I grabbed her wrists and pulled her against me. "Isabella, stop!" Her eyes shot to mine and what I saw broke my heart. It was a combination of despair, panic, fear and pain. She began shaking her head furiously.

"I always have bread. The will not be enough without it. Please, I have to make his bread." She was nearly hysterical as she begged, pulling against my hands that held her wrists tightly.

"Sweetheart, Mrs. Cope will oversee the bread and preparations for tomorrow. You need to rest now."

"No! Please, Edward. Papa always wa – "

"Isabella!" At the forceful sound of my voice, she fell silent. "He is gone, Bella. Let him go, Sweetheart."

"No." It was a whisper as she stilled her struggling against my hold. Her eyes filled with tears before closing as her head dropped back and she let out a mournful cry. I circled my arms around her waist and shoulder, holding her against my body as her knees buckled. Lowering our bodies to the floor, I held her as she alternated between uncontrollable sobs and pleading with me, though for what I did not know. When she had calmed a bit, I stood, lifting her in my arms and carrying her from the kitchen to our bedroom.

Laying her on the bed, I quickly gathered another nightgown as well as a washcloth and fresh water from the basin. Using gentle strokes, I wiped the flour from her face, neck and hands as she continued to weep quietly. Lifting her shoulders to help her sit, I raised her damp, dirty gown over her head and replaced it with the clean one. Her red, swollen eyes met mine as her tears continued to fall. Her chin trembled as she spoke quietly.

"I am sorry, Edward."

"You are grieving, love. You have nothing to apologize for." Gently pressing her to lie back, I tucked her in before climbing in beside her. Pulling her against me, she immediately buried her face in the crook of my neck, her tears falling on my shoulder. I was thankful for her exhaustion in that moment as it allowed sleep to overtake her before her grief could overcome her once again. I did not sleep again and found myself wide awake as the dawn broke. It was only when human necessity required that I rise, did I leave her.

Emerging from the water closet, a quiet knock at the door captured my attention. Pulling it open, I found my sister standing patiently on the other side. Leaning down to kiss her cheek, I greeted her, "Good morning, Alice. Did you rest well?"

"As well as can be expected. I understand you had an eventful night. How is she faring this morning?"

Glancing back to where Isabella was resting, I shook my head at Alice. "She still sleeps and I have no desire to wake her. Last night was… difficult… for her."

Alice nodded and offered a sad smile. "Today will be better. It will be good for her to hear from others that her father was loved. Let her rest, but wake her in enough time to be ready to receive guests. I will come assist her if you wish."

"Thank you, Alice."

* * * A H R * * *

The afternoon wake, sorrowful event that it was, presented my Bella with many opportunities to hear from others the impact of her father's life. She heard from farmers whose lives had been changed by Mr. Swan's generosity and his assistance when crops failed. She learned of his monetary gifts to a local orphanage that Pastor Webber and his wife introduced him to. She listened as Pastor and Mrs. Webber shared stories of her parents courtship and of their excitement at her birth. There could be no doubt in her heart and mind that her father was well loved and would be missed by many.

When our guests had departed, we made our way to the small family cemetery on the east side of the estate. Uncomfortable as she was, Alice endured the memorial as a means of supporting Bella as well. It was a quiet affair with only family and Pastor and Mrs. Webber in attendance. Only after everyone else had returned to the house did Bella speak.

"I would like to stay for a moment."

"Of course. Please stay as long as you like. Shall I step away?" She knew I would not leave her alone as we still had no idea of the whereabouts of Smith, but I would afford her some privacy if she wished.

"No. Please stay with me, Edward." She held her hand out, which I grasped and brought to my lips before holding it tightly between both of mine. She smiled sadly before turning back to the place her father now rested.

"Papa, I want to tell you so many things. Above all else, I want you to know that I am happy. Edward has given me so much more than I ever dreamed and I am loved, Papa. He loves me as you loved Mama. We will be happy here just as you were. I hope to fill the house with children and love and I want to offer a better life to those who live here. I can let you go now and I hope to make you proud, Papa."

Her last words were a whisper as she turned and buried her face in my chest. I held her as she wept before finally lifting her face to mine. "He would be as proud of you as I am, my Bella. Come, let me take you home."

* * * A H R * * *

For the next several days, Bella struggled to find ways to deal with her sorrow. She would seem well, only to burst into tears at the smallest provocation. I had arranged for Mr. Swan's personal affects to be delivered to the manor, knowing that eventually Bella would want them. Upon their arrival, she immediately opened the chests and sorted through her father's things. She pulled out his books and cotton shirts and an envelope addressed to Isabella Cullen. Laying these items aside, she donated the remaining items to one of the farmers, hoping he could find a use for the shoes and trousers and various other contents.

I understood the books and the correspondence, but when I inquired as to the purpose of the shirts, she simply replied that she was 'hopeful' and wished to keep them for that reason. Having no idea what she meant, and no desire to upset her, I let it go.

It was a week after her father's passing that I saw the light return to my Bella's eyes. Alice had endured a particularly difficult day, and we were all of the opinion that her child would arrive at any moment. We had brought our evening meal to the sitting room upstairs so that we could enjoy Alice's company. It had been a pleasant evening and Bella had smiled and participated in the conversation, seeming as though she would finally be able to abandon her melancholy. It was this moment that Alice chose to make an inquiry that caused Jasper and I to keep our breath as we awaited her response.

"Isabella, have you considered what you might do with the cottage?"

Bella just gave her a stunned look for a moment before responding, "No, I cannot say I have given it any consideration. What have you in mind?"

Tilting her head to the side and regarding my Bella with curiosity, she answered simply, "I thought perhaps you might like to create your tutoring program from the cottage. It seems as though your father might have approved of that use. It would also be sensible to have a dedicated space for it, rather than a borrowed space inside the manor."

Glancing at me, I assume, to judge my reaction, I smiled at Bella as I answered, "The cottage is yours, love, to do with as you please." She smiled widely as she kissed me soundly, murmuring her thanks against my lips.

Alice giggled at our display as Bella, in that moment, seemed to find her joy once again.

**Okay, well, that wasn't a bad spot to leave it, right? I will tell you that next chapter the family returns and some exciting things begin to happen. There are only a handful of chapters left, and I have already outlined my next story. I think I may be addicted now!**

**Thanks for reading, and please remember to vote if you have the chance.**

**Thanks,**

**Mel**


	31. Birth and Babies

**I own nothing.**

**So, I intended to have this out on Monday, but a sick little boy needed my attention. Sorry, but he comes first.**

**I have tried to reply to as many reviews as I was able this last week, but I didn't get to nearly as many as I would have liked. To those of you who reviewed, favorited, alerted, and recommended this story or me, THANK YOU! I treasure every word and I don't take lightly that you choose to spend your time reading my words. You are my heroes!**

BPOV

The next couple of days passed in a whirl of activity. Edward had wasted no time in securing a man to oversee the reconstruction of the cottage. After meeting with him briefly, we decided to leave the kitchen area in tact and convert the two bedrooms into one large room, providing us with two classrooms as well as an area to provide refreshment or meals should the need arise. Construction began immediately as did the search for a tutor.

It was on the second day of reconstruction that I remembered Mr. and Mrs. Black, who had been promised a permanent home in the cottage in return for their diligent care of my father. Alarmed, I inquired as to their whereabouts. Edward had smiled sheepishly as he answered.

"I worried for their ability to manage a farm as they were advanced in age. I should certainly have sought your opinion on the matter. As it is, I have offered them a small cottage in close proximity to the manor with the provision of employment within the household rather than a hard life working the land." It was a kind and generous offer and I was overcome with pride in my husband for his consideration. Mr. Black was now overseeing the stables, including the care and maintenance of the carriages. Mrs. Black was now assisting in the kitchen alongside Mrs. Cope.

Edward had engaged Jasper to begin collecting references for a tutor who might be willing to take on as many as fifteen students of varied ages at once. He assured us that there was plenty of time as we did not plan to begin until after the fall harvest. The winter months would offer little to do on the farms and therefore would be the best possible time to begin. For now there was little for me to do.

The crops began to grow and flourish, as did the relationship between Edward and I. With the pleasant warmth of the late spring afternoons, we discovered we both held a great love for the outdoors. We spent many mid-day meals together on a blanket in the gardens or in a secluded meadow I remembered discovering as a child. It was just such an afternoon when Eric, our driver, found us relaxing in the warmth of the sun.

"Mrs. Cullen, you are needed at the estate immediately."

Edward was instantly on alert. "What has happened, Eric?"

"Sir, Mrs. Whitlock is to be delivered of her child this day. She requires the assistance of Mrs. Cullen as your mother has yet to arrive."

I was already on my feet and moving to gather our things before he even finished speaking. Overcome with excitement as I was, there was a sudden fluttering of nerves as I feared I would be unable to provide the assistance that Alice would need. Sensing my sudden panic, Edward smiled in reassurance.

"I am certain the staff has already sent for the midwife. Alice will surely need your support, Bella. I am proud that you are willing to offer it to her." Taking my hand, Edward brought it to his lips before tugging me forward into his arms. "I only hope her distress does not cause you to fear birthing a child of our own."

I quickly turned my head and placed it against his chest so he would not see the apprehension in my eyes. I had no fear of childbirth but the mention of it did cause some distress in my heart. I hoped to discuss it at length with Carlisle when he arrived later this day. It was clear that my diversion was successful when Edward pulled back and encouraged me forward in the direction of the manor.

Arriving at the manor, I hurried up to Alice's room, entering to find her standing at the foot of the bed, grasping the post. Glancing over her shoulder, she smiled weakly before turning back to lean her forehead on the post. I did not move or speak, waiting, hoping she would give me some indication of her needs. After a few seconds, Alice turned to face me, holding out her hand. I immediately stepped forward, grasping her hand gently in mine.

"Thank you, Isabella. I am glad to have you with me." Turning, she walked to the edge of the bed, sitting and holding her hands out for my assistance. I held them as she lowered herself to recline on her side. "The midwife should be here soon, so there is no need for you to worry. I need your comfort and a willing hand to hold."

"I am happy to assist you, Alice. Thank you for trusting me." After inquiring as to whether she had any other needs, we spoke no words for some time, simply enduring her pains which were strong and consistent. The midwife arrived shortly before the evening meal and was introduced to us by her given name, Irina. She claimed that it was ridiculous to refer to someone formally by their surname under such personal circumstances. She informed us that it would likely be several more hours before the child arrived and while I was saddened that it would require so much of Alice, I was also joyful that perhaps Esme would arrive before the baby.

Some time later, Alice was in the grip of a particularly strong pain and had nearly doubled over on herself when there was a commotion in the hallway. Suddenly the door opened and Esme swiftly entered the room, turning back to press her hand against someone on the other side. Her voice was firm as she spoke. "Edward, remove him if he attempts to open this door. It will not do for him to be in here and I will not have her upset."

I could hear Edward's voice but could not comprehend the words before the door closed and Esme strode across the room. Releasing Alice's hand, I stood, allowing Esme to move closer to her daughter. Alice immediately reached out to grasp my hand once again. "Do not leave me, Isabella!"

"I will not, Alice. Do not fret, I was only offering your mother a moment of greeting." Stepping to the other side of the room, I was overwhelmed with the sight I beheld. Esme held Alice's hand in both of hers and whispered gentle words of comfort and encouragement. It was a sweet, tender moment and I felt as though I was intruding on what was meant to be a private moment. Turning away to allow them some privacy, I tended the fire and prepared some tea for Esme. Just as I turned back to her with the cup in my hand, Alice's scream caused me to startle. Dropping the cup to the floor, I watched as it shattered and the bits of china flew away from the impact. Bringing my eyes to meet hers, Esme held her hand out to me, waving me over to the bedside.

"Isabella, quickly, you must call for Irina and have Mrs. Cope prepare some water and linens. Go."

Running from the room, I stumbled over my hem as I rounded the corner toward the stairs. Edward and Jasper were sitting on the top step and immediately rose upon my arrival.

"Bella? What is it, love?"

"I need Irina and Mrs. Cope. We need water and linens."

Nodding in understanding, Edward was already moving down the stairs as he answered, "I will see to it. Go back and inform my mother that Jane has returned from town and we will send her up as well."

As I turned to go, Jasper grasped my wrist and held me firmly until I turned to him. His eyes were wild with worry and fear.

"She is strong, Jasper. I will care for her, I promise."

"Thank you, Isabella." His words were a soft whisper as he removed his hand and looked back in the direction of his rooms as the sound of Alice's cries once again shattered the silence. Turning away from him, I quickly made my way back, hoping that it would soon end for Alice's sake.

Moments after I entered the room, Irina, Mrs. Cope and Jane rushed into the room, quickly placing basins, linens and quilts in various places near the bed. Mrs. Cope hastily tied a sheet to the endpost of the bed and laid the end of it beside Alice, grasping her fingers and wrapping them around the sheet. After doing the same on the opposite side, she began placing linen cloths in the basin full of water.

Irina motioned toward the head of the bed and instructed Esme and I to occupy either side of the bed to assist Alice by placing our arms under her shoulders and lifting her when necessary. As I had never been witness to a birth, I was a bit overwhelmed and nervous but I did as directed. Moments later, as another pain caused Alice to cry out, Irina called out instructions.

"Esme, Isabella, lift her shoulders and hold her there." We immediately complied as Alice grasped the linens tied to the bedposts. Using them to pull herself up, she held her breath, seeming to strain against her own body before collapsing back against our arms. Lowering her body to the bed, I was given a cool, wet cloth and instructed to wipe the perspiration from her brow.

This was our routine for some time. Alice was exhausted and seemed to be slowing in her efforts as Esme and Irina encouraged her with gentle words and firm instruction. The sun had lowered and it grew dark. Mrs. Cope had diligently tended the fire and offered cool water to Alice on occasion as she kept up the work of birthing her child.

I had no knowledge of the length of time that had passed. I knew only that Alice's discomfort had become intensely stronger and my instinct told me that we neared the end. Moments later, Alice cried out and pushed herself unassisted from the bed as Irina worked quickly. I had not convinced myself to look in the direction of Irina's focus. I feared that I may lose heart if I observed what I knew to be occurring. It was no mystery to me – I knew that a child would be expelled from the body in the same place it entered, but observing it was another thing entirely. Instead, I chose to watch Alice for signs of distress and to care for her needs.

It was Alice's loud and agonizing cry that caused me to glance at Irina. She was smiling proudly as she lifted a tiny, squirming, child and placed it on Alice's belly.

"Your daughter, ma'am."

Esme quickly placed a soft cloth over the baby girl before assisting Alice to lift her into her arms. The room was still a flurry of activity as Irina was continuing her efforts on Alice's body and Mrs. Cope was offering warm, wet cloths to Esme and Alice who were cleaned the baby before wrapping her in an unsoiled cloth.

Several minutes later, Alice was dressed in a clean gown and comfortably settled into her bed, cradling her daughter in her arms. I suddenly felt the need to sit as I was overcome with emotion and joy for Alice's blessings. Hearing her voice, I turned my eyes to Esme as she gently wiped tears from my cheeks that I had not known were falling.

"It is a miraculous thing to behold, is it not?" I nodded in agreement as she took my hand. "Let us go find Jasper. I suspect he is desperate to meet his child and to verify for himself that his wife is well."

As expected, Jasper was standing directly in front of the door as it opened. His face was filled with worry as he looked imploringly between Esme and myself. Smiling, she motioned for him to enter before holding the door for me to exit the room. Moving into the hall, I nearly collapsed into Edward's waiting arms as Esme spoke from behind me.

"Alice is well, and has delivered a healthy and beautiful daughter. I will see if Mrs. Black has some supper for us and I will have Jane bring it to your room. Your dear wife should rest, Edward. She is nearly overcome with emotion."

Without waiting for a reply, Esme turned and disappeared around the corner. Edward smiled softly at me. "You are exhausted, love. Come, let me care for you." Taking me by surprise, he swept me up into his arms as he pressed his lips to my forehead. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I tucked my face into his neck and relaxed into his arms as he carried me toward our room.

Setting my feet on the floor, he closed the door before embracing me once again. His lips produced little more than a whisper against my cheek. "I have missed you this day, my Bella. It will be difficult to release you from my arms."

We stood, clinging to one another for some time as Jane delivered and set up our meal near the fire. Once everything was prepared, Edward pulled me toward the fire, but did not offer the chair. Instead, he reclined against the padded footstool, pulling me to sit between his outstretched legs. Placing his hands on my shoulders, he gently began to knead my sore muscles, alternating firm pressure with soft caresses. I found myself relaxing into his touch and ever so often, catching myself as my head would drop forward in an attempt to find sleep. Pulling my back against his chest, he pressed a kiss to the side of my head as he asked, "Do you care to eat, or shall I put you to bed, love?"

"I simply wish to stay in your arms. I have no care for anything else." In truth, I was exhausted and did not believe I would be able to remain awake long enough to eat. Standing to his feet, pulling me to stand as well, Edward undressed me to my chemise before leading me to the bed. Tucking me snugly under the quilts, he climbed in beside me after relieving himself of his clothing. Sleep found me quickly as I thought of soft, sweet baby girls in the warmth of my husbands embrace.

Morning had not arrived, I was certain of it. The windows were dark, showing no sign of the sun and the fire, though dwindling, was still burning lowly. Turning to my side, I was met with the peacefully sleeping face of my husband. He had been patient and loving as I was too worn to even carry a conversation with him and I was grateful for his comforting arms.

Rising from the bed, I pulled my robe around my body, fastening the sash before tending to the fire. The room was still comfortably warm, but would cool quickly without a blazing fire. Satisfied that the fire would sustain, I made my way toward the kitchen for some warm milk.

"It would seem that our new granddaughter is not the only one finding it difficult to sleep."

I was startled by the sound of Carlisle's voice as I entered the kitchen. He immediately rose and retrieved the kettle, pouring warm milk into a cup and offering it to me. Reaching out to accept it, he grasped my hand as it wrapped around the steaming cup and smiled gently. "Isabella, I cannot begin to express my thanks for what you have done for Alice today."

"I was honored that she desired my presence for such a personal event. I love Alice as if she were my born sister."

"As she does you. So tell me, what has troubled your mind so as to rob you of sleep?"

Seating myself across from him, I stared into my cup as I thought how to address my concern to him. He waited patiently in the silence for a moment before speaking.

"Esme will return shortly. Perhaps you would prefer to confide in her?"

"In truth, I would speak with both of you. I am in need of your medical knowledge and perhaps Esme would be of assistance as well." As if she had knowledge of our discussion, Esme entered the room and smile widely as she laid eyes on me.

"Are you well, Isabella? Or perhaps the excitement of a new child keeps you awake?"

Carlisle rose and held a chair out for his wife as he nodded at me. "I believe something has troubled our daughter. She has offered to share her burden with us if you are willing, dearest."

Reaching across to take my hand, Esme's smile was kind and reminded me of my own mother. I wondered briefly how it would have been to have these moments with her. Would she be proud of the woman I had become? Would I bring her honor as the mistress of Collingsworth? Esme's gentle squeeze of my fingers brought me from my thoughts. Taking a deep breath, I tried to put my worry into words.

"It has been many months now since Edward and I were wed. We share….. um… we have… um, I mean to say that we are….um..."

"Passionate. You are very passionate with one another, Isabella. The love you feel for one another is very evident in your physical demonstrations when in the presence of others. I can only imagine that it is much more so in private."

Esme's bold words were unexpected and I could feel the heat in my face as I was certain my skin was fairly glowing with my embarrassment. Carlisle's chuckle brought my eyes up from the floor as he and Esme shared a laugh at my expense. I knew we were a bit obvious, but it was something altogether different to have her voice it aloud. After a moment, I could not help but grin at their amusement.

"I am happy that you can find merriment in my humiliation. Truth be told, I cannot be ashamed of the passion that we share, but that is not the source of my concern."

Nodding in understanding, Carlisle gestured for me to continue. I had already embarrassed myself in the outset of this conversation, I only hoped I would have some encouragement at the end of it.

"I have known many women who find themselves in a family way a very short time after being wed. My concern is that for all the… um… passion that we engage in, I have not found myself in that circumstance. I am beginning to fear that I may not be able to produce an heir for my husband."

The last was spoken no louder than a whisper as I averted my eyes from Carlisle's compassionate gaze. It was silent for a few moments before he spoke.

"I can certainly understand the weight of watching Alice carry and bear a child, wondering if you will share that blessing someday. Isabella, may I speak freely without causing you discomfort?"

"Please."

"You have endured a great deal more uncertainty and burden than most young women of your upbringing. You have toiled and labored for some years, only to find yourself in the uncomfortable situation of a forced marriage to a stranger. Since that marriage, you have been worried and fretting over pleasing our family and endured a serious illness, only to recover and be threatened in your own home by a man who remains at large to this day. Isabella, those circumstances alone would cause difficulty for most women." He took a breath as he leaned forward in his chair. Reaching across the table to grasp my hand, he met my eyes and released a sigh before continuing.

"Truthfully, Isabella, I feared for your health when we first met you. You were so small and frail, and woefully undernourished. Seeing you as you are now, I almost have difficulty believing you to be the same woman. You are healthy and strong and appear to be happy. I doubt that it will be long before you find yourself with child, my dear girl. Certainly not long at all if my son has any involvement."

We all shared a laugh at his frank appraisal of Edward's affection. Sipping my lukewarm milk, I found comfort in his words as I had not considered those difficulties in my worry.

Glancing up as Esme rose from the table, she placed her hand on my shoulder and smiled. "If you wish for reassurance, perhaps you should speak to the midwife when she comes to see Alice tomorrow."

"I will. Thank you."

Our topic of conversation turned to the name chosen for the baby. She was to be introduced as Miss Anna Grace Whitlock. I looked forward to visiting with Alice and Anna in the morning, but found that I was having difficulty keeping awake. Carlisle and Esme seemed ready for rest as well. As we rose to leave the warm kitchen, the sound of footstep could be heard rushing toward the room. Turning, my eyes found the frantic face of my husband. He wore nothing but his trousers and his hair was in beautiful disarray. His eyes widened as they took in the three of us standing before him.

"Bella? Are you well, love?"

Esme's giggle drew his attention as she answered, "She is well, son, just tired. Remove her to your bed before she sleeps while standing beside me."

Offering his hand, he immediately drew me into his arms when I grasped it. Pressing my cheek against his bare chest, I could not help the hum of contentment that escaped me. I heard him bed a muffled 'good night' as he turned me toward the door, leading me directly to our room.

Once we were settled under the quilts, my tired eyes met Edward's wary gaze. "Something troubles you?"

It was a question rather than a statement. I smiled as I placed my hand on his cheek. His hand immediately covered mine, bringing it to his lips and kissing my palm.

"I am not troubled. I simply could not sleep and went in search of some warm milk. Your parents were of the same mind. We enjoyed the simple pleasure as well as conversation. You found us as we were readying to retire. I am happy to be in the warmth and comfort of your arms, husband."

Kissing me softly before trailing his lips along my cheek, temple and a final lingering kiss to my forehead, he tightened his arms and bid me rest. "Sleep well, my love."

Morning dawned bright and promising as the manor was once again full of activity. Emmett, Rosalee and Emma had arrived just after the morning meal and would be staying with us for some time as James Smith had yet to be found. We were getting Alice settled in with the baby to meet Emma when Edward knocked softly.

I cradled the tiny girl in my arms as I turned to watch him enter the room. As his eyes met mine, I could not discern the expression on his face. He quickly came to stand by my side, gazing intently at the baby. Lifting his arms, he smiled softly, "May I?"

Placing Anna in his arms, I felt the breath leave my lungs at the beauty of the image before me. Edward – strong, masculine, and so handsome, gently cradling a tiny, delicate little girl in his arms, with an adoring smile. After a moment, he lifted his eyes to mine and smiled a crooked, but genuine smile. Stepping forward, I whispered, "I want this life. I want this with you someday."

His smile was radiant as he responded, "I want that as well, my Bella. So very much."

Stepping carefully to her side, Edward gently passed the baby to her mother before turning to face me. "Emmett has some information that he would like to share. Will you join us in the study?"

Nodding, I took his hand and excused myself from the other ladies. Rosalee stood immediately and joined us as well. Esme entered with Emma as we were leaving, causing me to have no worry that someone would care for Alice's needs in our absence.

Arriving moments later in the study, Emmett took Rosalee's hand and led her to a chair while Edward and I seated ourselves on the sofa. Leaning back against Edward's desk, Emmett heaved a deep sigh before looking to Rosalee. It was she who began to speak.

"Tanya has been located by her parents. All these past months she has been living in a convent in the next county. Last week, she gave birth to a tiny boy. It was too early and the child is not expected to survive, but her parents have received the baby to raise should he live. Tanya has returned to the convent where she intends to stay. It would appear that the child was conceived and she carried him already when she arrived here for the Winter Ball. It would surely explain her forward behavior as I am now certain she intended to claim the child as yours, Edward, were she able to do so."

I am certain the expression of shock on Edward's face mirrored my own. I could not comprehend all that we had been told. Edward was finding his senses much more quickly as he asked, "What of the child's father?"

"It seems that as soon as she informed him of her circumstance, he abandoned her with no intention of returning."

"Has she named this worthless man?"

"She has. He is none other than James Smith."


	32. A Letter and A Proposal

**Only wish I owned it!**

**So… contest season is over for my students. Woo Hoo! We can finally relax and enjoy the last quarter of the school year. I should have more time to write now that we have put it behind us. Thank you for your patience.**

**As always, I answered as many reviews as I had a chance to get to, but it was not nearly as many as I would have liked. To those of you who left me kind words, thank you so much. You will never know how much I appreciate your encouragement.**

**This chapter is a little short, but I wanted to get it out today – it is my birthday! Let me know what you think… that would be a great gift!**

EPOV

"Smith? Can this truly be possible? How is it that one man can cause such widespread devastation and loss and yet still maintain his freedom?"

These questions plagued my mind as well, but it was Bella who gave them a voice. I must admit, I feared her reaction when Rosalie began her tale, and yet the strong woman beside me was of no surprise. She was not upset or fearful, but seemed rather like the rest of us in the room – simply working to comprehend the extent of James Smith's evil. After a moment, she met my eyes and spoke again.

"She meant to compromise our marriage to claim her child as yours. How frightened she must have been, to carry a child with no prospect of a future to provide for him. No home, no income and no promise of family to aid her." I watched cautiously as she spoke her thoughts aloud, trying desperately to understand the turn of events that left the rest of us speechless.

Emmett finally cleared his throat, gaining her attention. "The whereabouts of Smith are still unknown, but there has been some communication between the depository and a gentleman that Smith has engaged to handle his financial affairs. The constable seems to think it will be only a matter of days until the income he has stolen will be recovered. You will be a wealthy woman, Isabella."

Bella's head snapped up as her face revealed her confusion. "Married women cannot inherit, Emmett. Any fortune that is recovered will go directly to my husband to do with as he pleases."

"You have not told her?" As I shook my head in confirmation of his knowledge that I had, in fact, not informed my wife of her wealth, Emmett turned to Rosalie, "Perhaps now would be a fine time to stroll through the gardens." Offering his hand, he led Rosalie from the room, leaving the silence behind as my wife awaited my news.

"Edward?"

"Come here, love." She grasped my extended hand, using it to bring herself closer to where I sat. Once settled, I continued to hold her hand within mine as I worked to find the words to explain her current situation. Realizing that a large portion of the explanation would come from her own father, I stood and retrieved a letter from my desk. Offering it to her, she accepted it from my hand with a look of curiosity.

"Bella, this was found among your father's personal documents in the cottage. I read it only at Jasper's insistence as he felt it would have some bearing on the future of the estate. I believe you should know it's contents before we continue our discussion."

Her hands trembled as she held the folded parchment. I waited silently as she sought the courage to open it. When she finally lifted her face and met my eyes, hers were filled with trepidation and worry. "I do not think I can yet bear to see his words in his own hand. Would you… will you read it aloud for me?"

Offering her an understanding smile, I placed a soft kiss to her cheek as I received the letter from her trembling hand. Taking a deep breath as I carefully unfolded it, I could not help but notice as she averted her eyes to keep from seeing his handwriting. Grasping her hand once again in mine, I asked, "Are you certain you wish to do this now?"

At her nod of agreement, I cleared my throat and began reading.

"My dearest Isabella, Words are inadequate to describe my love for you this day. I am honored by the woman you have become and proudly call you daughter. Were the world mine, I would offer it to you gladly, knowing that you would handle every circumstance with the grace and wisdom you so aptly demonstrate each day.

"Alas, my dear child, it would seem that I will have very little to offer you as an inheritance. Through some circumstance that escapes my understanding, the estate of Collingsworth is dwindling. I fear that some underhanded dealings have relieved us of much of our worth. While I understand the occurrence, my mind becomes ever more feeble and I am afraid that I cannot grasp the origin of the problem, nor the solution of it. I have endowed Justice Clearwater with documents that entrust you with the affairs of the estate. It rightfully belongs to you, and will become yours upon my death. Should you marry, a provision has been placed on the will that ensures the estate will not be absorbed by your husband's estate, but will instead be passed to your children. Collingsworth has always been home to the Swan name and it is my greatest wish that it should continue as such. You alone will have the authority to determine the outcome of the estate. Should you marry a noble and honorable man and believe him to be worthy of the responsibility, you may choose to be relieved of the burden of ownership I have placed on you. I trust your wisdom and judgment, Isabella. Ever your loving father, Charles Swan."

Folding the parchment and placing it on the table beside the sofa, I turned to face my Bella, finding it difficult to gauge her response. Her furrowed brow and otherwise vacant expression gave me no indication distress. After a moment, I could bear it no longer.

"Bella? Do you comprehend the meaning of your father's words?"

"How can it be, Edward? The estate was sold before my father's death. I have no legal claim to anything he might have left behind save that which I already have. What difference can this letter make?" Her confusion was clear and I could understand it easily. It was only after a lengthy conversation with Jasper that I was able to comprehend all that was entailed.

Squeezing her fingers gently to gain her attention once again, I waited until her eyes met mine. "Sweetheart, I am no solicitor, but Jasper has assured me that under the circumstances, you are the sole heiress of the estate."

"How can that be true? The estate was legally sold to your uncle and rightfully passed to you through your father at his death. How is it that it could be mine?"

"The estate was auctioned under less than legal circumstances. At the very least, the creditors should have audited the accounts for the discrepancies that were so plainly obvious. Had they done so, Smith would have been brought to justice long before now and the estate would never have been lost to your family."

Her wide eyes and startled expression gave me pause and I waited patiently for her to comprehend all that I had spoken before continuing. "Had Collingsworth been sold to anyone else, there would be many more legal issues to sort through. However, because you have married the man who currently holds the deed to the estate, there is only the signing of documents that need take place."

"Can it truly be that simple?"

"It can be, and in fact, truly is that simple. It would seem that the current owner of Collingsworth is very much in love with the rightful owner. He wants nothing more than her happiness and therefore, has no objection whatsoever to her claim on the property."

It took only a moment for her arms to wrap enthusiastically around my neck, while her lips crashed to mine. It was a fast, hard kiss that took me by surprise. By the time I had been able to consider responding, she had pulled away to favor me instead with a beaming smile. "I love you, husband. Thank you."

"You are very welcome, love."

After more discussion, I called for Jasper to join us as we needed some clarification on legal aspects of the transfer. He was able to explain it clearly and concisely to my Bella, leaving the decisions to be made after she had time to consider all the information.

After explaining the documents and her options, he excused himself to return to his wife and daughter and Bella and I were summoned to the mid-day meal by my mother. It was only moments before we entered the small dining room that Bella stopped and grasped my arm, pulling me to her side and imploring me with her eyes to hear her out.

"Edward, please, let us keep this to ourselves for now. I do not wish your family to think I have somehow caused you to offer me your estate."

I was uncertain as to whether I was able to hide my frustration from her.

"Isabella, can you not understand? They are all _your_ family now. They love you as though you had been born a Cullen. As for the estate, it already belongs to you. The deed may, in fact, bear my name, but I own nothing that does not also belong to you, my wife. In this instance, Collingsworth is yours, and I am pleased that you offer me a home here. With you."

"I am sorry, I did not consider it to be as you state. It seems unthinkable and wonderful at the same time. Thank you, Edward."

I simply smiled, kissed her forehead and grasped her hand to lead her to dine with _our _family. They were all assembled, without Jasper and Alice, of course. Emmett and Rosalie shared stories of their travels while Emma thoroughly entertained my sweet wife with her antics and pleasant nature. My parents seemed perfectly thrilled to be residing at the manor with all of their children and grandchildren in residence as well. I could only hope they continued to be happy here as I hoped to gain a favor from them for the next couple of months.

When the meal was completed, I turned to find Isabella engaged in a lively conversation with my mother regarding something to do with the garden. Grasping her hand and bringing it to my lips, I placed a soft kiss on her palm before holding it against my chest. Her eyes watched me intently the entire time.

"Bella, will you walk in the gardens with me? I have something I wish to discuss."

After gaining her agreement, I stood and held her chair as she rose. Taking her hand, I made our excuses to our family as I led her to the gardens.

We had been walking and discussing the renovations that had been completed and created a stunningly beautiful garden, when Bella turned and caught my gaze.

"Has something happened, Edward?"

I was quick to put her at ease. "No. Of course not, sweetheart. I simply have a proposal for you."

"What sort of proposal?"

I had no idea whether she would be receptive to my plans, but I sincerely hoped she would consider them at length. I had spent the better part of the days since her father's passing making arrangements and preparations and now I only awaited her agreement to set all in motion. Taking a deep breath, I posed a question.

"Sweetheart, were you given the opportunity to travel, where would you go?"

She took only the breadth of a second to answer, "The sea. I would wish to see the waves of the sea breaking the shore and returning to the open water with no land in sight."

"Have you never seen it?"

"No. I have traveled no farther than London, and that only as a child. I have only imagined how open water would appear. I would like to see it with my eyes before I die."

Once again, I was forced to consider all that she had been deprived of. It was sorrowful that she had arrived at adulthood having never seen anything of the world, while at the same time, a blessing to me as I would be the one to give her that experience. Taking her hand in mine, I met her eyes and offered her the world.

"Bella, would you accompany me to France. I wish to show you so much of the world and Paris is a beautiful city. We can stay near the coast on the southern edge of the country and return home only when you have seen all that you wish."

She considered my words while keeping her eyes locked on mine, as though she were attempting to read my very thoughts. "You are not jesting? You sincerely wish to take me to Paris?"

"I do." Her expression did not change. "Isabella, the harvest will be upon us in only a short time and I will be needed here. Now is the ideal opportunity. You have yet to become with child, and there are no other pressing responsibilities to prohibit our travels. Will you accompany me? Please say yes."

"Yes." Her answer was simple and caught me by surprise. Her eyes were alight with joy and her smile was radiant. Pulling her into my arms, I buried my face against her neck , rocking her gently.

"Thank you, love. I will see to it immediately."

By nightfall, all arrangements had been made and we were set to begin our travels in only a week. I desired a quick departure as I wished to travel at Bella's leisure, allowing her to see all that she wished along the way. We had informed my family at the evening meal, relishing their excitement for our adventure. My parents had agreed to stay on at Collingsworth to oversee the crops until we returned. Their own estate was well established and was in the capable hands of their overseer and my mother certainly enjoyed the idea of remaining within a days travel of her newest grandchild. We spoke of places and events we wished to see and I could feel Bella's excitement grow as the evening progressed.

However, her countenance became guarded and quiet once we were alone in our room. She had prepared for bed and sat silently watching the stars at the window. Coming to stand at her back, I wrapped one arm around her waist, pulling her back against my chest while my other hand pulled her braided hair away from her neck. Pressing my lips against her throat, I waited for her to relax into me before speaking.

"What troubles you, wife? You have been silent since we have been alone and I am left to wonder if I have offended you."

She turned her head quickly to meet my eyes. "No, husband. You are attentive and loving as always. I have no reason to be upset with you."

"Then tell me, what has caused your quiet contemplation?"

Her head dropped forward and her brow furrowed. I waited as she gathered her thoughts. It was always difficult to be patient and wait for her to voice her thoughts. It often caused me frustration as I wished only for her happiness and desired her immediate disclosure of any troublesome thoughts or occurrances. Fortunately, my hard learned wisdom in dealing with her easily overcame my frustration and she would never see my impatience. I simply continued to press light kisses to her skin and wait for her to be comfortable enough to confide in me. It only took a moment.

"I worry that I will not carry your children."

Her quiet words stunned me as I had no idea she had considered this. Turning her to face me, I lifted her chin with my fingers, bringing her eyes to mine.

"What has caused this concern, Bella? Have you a medical condition that will not allow you to bear children?"

"No. I have had no diagnosis. Your father has assured me that – "

"You have spoken to my father about this?" I was reeling from her words. We had spoken very little about children and I had not considered any difficulty.

"I spoke to him only briefly. I was concerned because we were so... um… passionately engaged, and I had not become with child. I worried that it might not be a possibility. I am sorry that I spoke with him without informing you."

Her words were but a whisper as she finished. I kissed her softly as I gathered my thoughts. "I am not angry, love. I am only concerned for you. I am saddened that you did not feel comfortable enough to confide in me. Was my father able to set your mind at ease?"

"He was. He felt that perhaps I had been under a great deal of pressure these last several months. The emotional difficulties as well as my being underfed and overworked for some time would certainly have an effect on my ability to carry a child for you."

She had changed so much in the last few months, I had almost forgotten the tiny, malnourished woman I found at the cottage that day. She was pale and frightened and had been too slight of frame to be altogether healthy. The woman I held in my arms on this night was pink and happy and while still slim, had a softness and curve to her body. I adored the shape of her. So much, in fact, that I would soon need to distance my body from hers if we were to continue this conversation. It seemed that my body always had other, rather lustful responses when I considered my wife's body.

Clearing my throat and stepping back, I took her hand and led her to the bed to sit while I stood before her, lightly stroking her fingers as I kept hold of her hands in my own.

"You are healthy and strong, Bella. I have no worries that we will have a child of our own one day. Do not misunderstand me, I very much wish to build a family with you. However, until that occurs, I will be more than content to find my comfort in my wife and the life that we share together."

"And if it should not occur?" I would have thought she was truly worried had it not been for the small smile and hopeful glint in her eyes. I slowly brought my body forward to lean over her, causing her to lean back until she fell onto the bed. I allowed my gaze to drift to her breasts as my hand drew her gown up above her knee. Bringing my eyes back to hers, I did not miss the intensity they held as she watched me. Offering her a wicked grin, I spoke only the truth.

"Then we must try harder, my love."


	33. Sleeplessness and a Rainy Morning

**I own nothing.**

**You are all amazing. I never cease to be amazed at your kind words and encouragement. I feel terrible for taking so long with this update, but on the upside, it is spring break! You know what that means? More writing time for me this week! The next chapter is almost complete and I plan to post it as soon as it is ready. So, I guess I just want to say thank you for being patient with me and for continuing to review and recommend this story to others. **

**This will be a pleasant bit of fluff, so, who wants to travel to Paris with Edward?**

BPOV

The night sky was clear and dark save for the brightness of the stars. Perhaps it was the silent darkness of the manor that caused it to seem as black as pitch, but I could not be certain.

I could not sleep.

We would be departing for Paris after the morning meal and I could not find rest as my mind was spinning with excitement, questions and worry. Our trunks had been packed and prepared for travel. They had been loaded onto the carriage and were awaiting departure at first light. I could hardly contain my excitement over the coming trip and looked forward to the time alone with my husband.

But my excitement was tempered with worry over Collingsworth. James Smith had

disappeared and there had been no further word from Tanya Denali. I could not deny my worry that Smith would resurface at Collingsworth in our absence. While I was relatively unconcerned regarding Carlisle's ability to handle the situation, I was worried about his having to deal with Smith at all. I did not wish to inconvenience my husband's father while he was caring for the estate in our absence.

Finally, the estate was what had caused the unending questions in my mind. My father had written that document while his mind was still stable and the estate was still solvent. I could not fathom how any of his wished could be honored once the estate had been lost to us.

I had spent some time with Jasper earlier today as he explained the simplicity of the transfer of ownership from Edward to me. He seemed comfortable in discussing it, leaving me unconcerned regarding the legality of it. I knew Jasper well enough to know that he would not pursue this course of action if it were not legal. The question was not the validity of it, but rather my husband's choice in the matter.

In fact, the more I questioned Jasper regarding Edward's involvement, the more evasive he became, telling me I should speak with Edward if I had any questions. I simply could not bring myself to do it. In the few days since he offered to take me to Paris, he had seemed so light of heart and joyful, I could not bring myself to burden him with my concerns.

Instead, I found myself unable to sleep and wandering the estate in the early morning hours while the rest of the manor slept peacefully. The conservatory was where I found myself this night, staring into the darkness, contemplating my worry. It was peaceful and comforting to enjoy the silence in this room. Lost to my own thoughts, I was startled when I glanced up and found Edward's reflection staring back at me in the window.

Spinning quickly, I brought my hand up to my chest as I pulled in a stunned breath. Meeting his eyes, I could not help but notice the frustration and determination I found there.

"I did not mean to wake you, Edward."

"I am certain you did not. At least not any more than you wished to wake me last night or the night before."

Guilt washed over me as I realized that I had caused him worry. Dropping my gaze to the floor, I responded, "Forgive me. I did not realize – "

"What? That I would be concerned when I woke to find our bed cold? Or that I would be unable to sleep until you were safely beside me once again?" Running his hands over his face and through his hair, he sighed and shook his head before meeting my eyes.

"I am not upset, Bella, but I am no fool either. Something is troubling you and keeping you from rest. Perhaps if we discussed it, you could put your mind at ease."

He stood patiently as he waited for me to decide. I knew he was right. I would be much more at ease with answers to my worries, but it was difficult to voice it, as I knew it might anger him. In that moment, I determined I would tell him my concerns, but only after exacting his promise that he would not be upset with me for doing so. Taking a deep breath, I offered him my terms.

"I will discuss it with you, but first I must ask that you not be angry with me."

He regarded me silently for a moment before nodding. "I promise I will endeavor to hear you out calmly. Please tell me what troubles you."

Knowing it was the best he could offer, I began with a question. "Were I not your wife, would you have sought out the reason for the loss of the estate, offering it to me once the corruption had been discovered?"

I knew this was not what he was expected as he simply stared blankly at me for a moment before pressing his fingers to his eyes and answering, "I would prefer to think that I would do the proper thing and offer the estate to the wronged owner. Truthfully, I believe that I would have fought any attempt you made to recover the estate as it has proved to be extremely profitable. As humbling as it is to admit it, I would have considered the income as my first priority in determining whether to keep the estate."

"So how is it so easy for you to forfeit the title to me now?"

Sighing, he turned to face me fully once again. "It is easy because you are my wife. I have witnessed what you have sacrificed and I am trying to honor your father's wishes. His desire was that the estate would remain inhabited by a Swan. I can ensure that occurs."

Knowing this was the moment I could put this all to rest, I squared my shoulders and shook my head as I made my demand.

"I do not want it."

His startled expression nearly brought about laughter. He certainly had not expected me to deny ownership outright.

"Explain yourself, then, for I am at a loss, Bella."

"You have asserted repeatedly that I am now a Cullen. That your family is now my family. If that is true, then I am no longer a Swan, but a true Cullen. Even if I were granted ownership of the estate, any children we have to inherit Collingsworth will be Cullens as well."

He was shaking his head and began to negate my words before I had even finished speaking, "Bella, it is not a choice you must make. You are – "

"But it is, Edward. I know nothing of estate business. I will not ask you to manage a property that bears my name and reduce you to the role of overseer." My voice dropped and I stepped forward to take his hands in mine. "It cannot be both, husband. Allow me to offer you this as your wife. As Mrs. Cullen. I would rather have the love of my family and know that the home and life that my husband provides is secure for our future generations than the privilege of ownership. Please leave things as they are. My father's legacy will live in our memories. I do not need a name or title to ensure it."

He did not speak for some time as he held my gaze, his eyes seeming to search out some truth in mine. When he finally spoke, it was a reverent whisper. "You humble me, Mrs. Cullen. How is it I can possibly deserve you?"

He closed the distance between us quickly and I had expected his kiss to be hard and frantic. It was not. It was the slightest brush of his lips over mine. A whisper of a touch. Then another. And another. I found myself grasping tightly to his arms as he leaned back to meet my eyes.

"Come to bed with me, Mrs. Cullen."

* * * A H R * * *

It was far too early the next morning when I found myself settled into the carriage beside my husband as we waved to our family on the steps of the manor. Mrs. Cope had packed a basket of fruit, bread and cheese for the mid-day meal and some dried fruit and nuts should we find ourselves hungry before reaching the inn where we planned to stop for the night.

Edward reached across the carriage and took my hand in his, bringing it to his lips for a tender kiss. I could not help the yawn that escaped in response to his sweet gesture. Being the gentleman that he is, he barked out a laugh before asking, "Have I already succeeded in boring you, my wife? Before we have even left estate grounds? This does not bode well for our trip."

Smiling shyly, I dropped my gaze to the floor before glancing toward him from the corner of my eye, "Someone took my rest from me last evening. I cannot help but show my fatigue."

Edward smirked, raising his brow in question, "And who is this foul rogue who has robbed you? I will surely make him answer for his crimes."

"Ah, well, the only crime was that I slept at all. And rest assured, I suspect he is just as fatigued as I."

Grinning wickedly, Edward rose and seated himself beside me in the carriage, pressing his lips to my throat and whispering, "And you may rest assured, dear wife, that last evening may be the most sleep you have for some time."

Our lips connected then, and quickly became more insistent as did our hands. Caught in the desperate need our bodies always held for the other, I cried out as Edward's teeth caught my earlobe and his hands found my breast. He chuckled as he drew back to meet my eyes. "Shhh…. We are not alone, love. The driver and the footman have perfect hearing."

I am certain my eyes were wide and round as I realized what they may have heard. Edward was obviously entertained as he laughed at my embarrassment. Moments later, as he leaned in to kiss me once again, another yawn would not be stifled, causing him more laughter.

"I will endeavor to not be insulted at your boredom with my lovemaking. Come, rest your head in my lap, Sweetheart, and sleep. Our journey has just begun and I would have you well rested for the adventure ahead."

It was some time later that I felt the gently sway of the carriage come to a halt and heard the unmistakable sound of the driver and footman dismounting. Lifting my head from Edward's leg, I turned to find him sleeping peacefully against the padded interior wall. Placing my hand against his cheek, he mumbled quietly before rolling his head to lean into my hand. Seconds later, his eyes fluttered and opened, meeting my gaze.

"It seems I was not the only one deprived of rest."

He opened his mouth to respond, but his words were stilled by the opening of the carriage door by Mr. Yorkie. "Sir, Mrs. Cullen, your mid-day meal is being prepared."

Edward rose and exited the carriage, then turned, offering me his hand. "Come, love, let us go for a walk before we eat."

We walked for a while, stretching our legs and enjoying the scenery before settling in for our meal. Once finished, we returned to the carriage and settled ourselves for the remainder of the journey to the inn.

* * * A H R * * *

After several days of travel, we arrived at the last inn we would board before reaching our destination. We enjoyed a simple evening meal before retiring to our room for the night. My body ached with the extended travel and I looked forward to resting on a comfortable bed. There had been a couple of inns that were not inclined to provide the softest of beds, which only served to increase my travel discomfort. I had not complained to Edward, feeling very grateful to him for providing me such an adventure and not wishing to cause him frustration. However, he must have felt the same discomfort as I, for he assured me that this particular inn would provide the sweetest of comforts.

It was no surprise then, as I entered the room, to find a very large copper tub in the corner near the hearth. The water was steaming and smelled of lavender and vanilla. I gasped as I felt Edward's hands encircle my waist.

"I thought you would enjoy a bath."

"Edward, that tub is so large. I believe several people could fit inside at once."

"Hmmm… perhaps that is so, however, I am content for it to hold only two." His lips and tongue were working gently against the skin of my neck as his fingers were making quick work of the buttons securing my dress. It took only moments to remove every article of clothing from our bodies. The room was warm, but I could not help but shiver due to the anticipation of feeling him against me.

Grasping my hand, Edward pulled me toward the tub and stepped into it, one foot at a time. Maintaining his hold on me, he reached out with his other hand and grasped my hip to steady me as I stepped in as well. He immediately lowered himself into the water, pressing his back against the end of the tub and pulling me to sit between his legs. Once seated, he wrapped his arms around me, one at my waist and the other at my shoulders, holding me against his body securely. We both began to relax in the soothing warmth as the discomfort of our travels melted away. When the water began to cool, Edward reached for the cloth and soap and began gently washing the dust and grime of the road from my body. Guilt welled up within me as I turned my face to him.

"Edward, I do not think I can be…. I – I am exhausted and –"

"Shhh, Bella. I expect nothing from you. I know you are in need of rest. Let me care for your needs and we can get some sleep." He continued his ministrations, shifting my body to wash his own, but never losing contact with me as he did so. Once finished, he helped me rise from the water and carefully climb from the tub. We dried our bodies before falling unclothed into the blissfully soft bed, our bodies wrapped around one another. I am certain I heard him speak softly, but my mind could not recognize the words as I found sleep within seconds.

We rose early the next morning, sharing a quick meal with the other occupants of the inn before boarding our carriage for the final part of out journey. I grew more excited and giddy as we arrived on the outskirts of Paris. The city was bustling and loud and there seemed to be no end to the mass of humanity. I turned to face Edward, only to find him chuckling and shaking his head in amusement.

"Tell me, husband, what amuses you so?"

"You, my love. I do not think it possible for your eyes to grow any larger. Are you overcome?"

"I have seen nothing like it! Where shall we go first?" I found myself bouncing in anticipation of all that the city would hold for us, and full of excitement to share it with Edward.

"The marketplace, I think. You are in desperate need of some spoiling and I intend to shower you with gifts today."

The marketplace was like nothing I had ever experienced. Vendors sold everything from fruits and vegetables to silks and satins. Edward carefully negotiated prices and amounts as we moved from shop to shop, sending our purchases to our waiting carriage. Boxes filled with bonnets, books, ribbons, and china. I feared we would have no room to ride comfortably for the remainder of our trip!

Grasping my hand, Edward pulled me toward a dress shop, "Come Bella, we should see what fine gowns await you in Paris."

"Edward, wait, please. How are we to manage all of it. Surely there will be no room for you and I in the carriage if we are to bring these purchases home."

He came to a stop and turned to face me, pulling both of my hands to his lips before speaking, "Silly girl, have no worry. I intend to ship everything to Collingsworth. It will arrive home in a matter of days where it will await our arrival and enjoyment."

An hour later, we left the dress shop after purchasing yards and yards of silk, wool, organza, and muslin. Edward found some stunning lace and insisted on purchasing it as well, only to leave it with the dressmaker with a promise to return for it before we departed the city. I knew there was some scheming, but could not fathom his plans.

We dined in a local pub where Edward made inquiries for the theater and opera, planning for the following evening. It was our intention to visit several exhibitions of art and sculpture the next morning and Edward thought an evening of theatrical entertainment would be a satisfying end to the day. After our meal and finalizing our plans, we returned to the inn where we fell exhausted into a deep slumber.

The fog of sleep was heavy and I found it difficult to rouse myself from it. I could hear a rumbling and slowly recognized the familiar sound of the thunder as my senses slowly focused. The sheets felt like silk to my skin. Edward had very much enjoyed sleeping with nothing between us the night before and insisted that we sleep bare for the remainder of our trip. I was only too happy to comply.

Warm. I could feel warmth and … wet. Rolling my head to the side, I slowly opened my eyes to find Edward's startling green orbs staring up at me, his tongue tracing a lazy circle around the nipple of my right breast. At my sudden sharp intake of breath, he removed his lips from me and smiled wickedly.

"Thunderstorms will require that we spend the day indoors, my love. I thought this might be a rather pleasant way to pass the time. Shall I continue?"

My surprise at his words was short lived. I grasped his hair, pressing his face once again toward my breast, which he attacked with vigor. Licking, sucking, nibbling his way between the two. Lifting himself away from my body, he rolled me quickly onto my stomach, pressing his lips to my spine at the small of my back. He left no span of skin unattended as he made his way back up to my neck, gently nipping with his teeth as his hands slid under my body to cup my breasts.

I felt as though my body was on fire and his touch was the only possibility to soothe it, yet the more he touched, the more I burned. His body covered mine as I turned my head to meet his lips. His mouth devoured mine as he pressed more firmly against me. I could feel him hot and firm against my back. I was desperate for him and twisted my body beneath him, bringing us face to face.

"Edward, please." I would beg if need be, but there was no need. Edward pushed himself up onto his knees, grasping my hands and placing them on the wrought iron framework of the headboard. Wrapping my fingers around it, he closed his hands over mine for a moment.

"Hold on, love."

Releasing my hands, he grasped my legs at the knees and pulled me to him, wrapping my legs around his hips as he thrust forward into me. The suddenness of it caused me to cry out and arch upward from the bed. Edward immediately stilled.

"Bella?" Opening my eyes, I was met with his worried gaze.

"Please… more."

Pulling away nearly completely, he thrust forward once again while gauging my response. I knew the moment he allowed himself to give in. His eyes darkened and his gaze alternated between my breast and my eyes as he began to move with a steady rocking motion as he held my hips in place.

The room was filled with sound. Thunder rumbling overhead, the steady thrum of the rain on the windows, skin sliding against skin and the wet sound of his body sliding within mine. The sounds, feeling, and sight of him over me, surrounding me outside and in was more than my senses could contain. I closed my eyes while whispering his name.

"Look at me, Bella. I want to see your eyes as I bring you pleasure." He reached up, grasping the headboard just above my hands, the leverage causing his angle to shift. I cried out at the sensation as my legs began to shake.

"Edward. Edward." His name was a chant on my lips and his eyes never left mine as my body arched off of the bed and I was lost to the pleasure I had only known at his hand. He thrust fiercely twice more before shouting my name and clenching his eyes shut.

Collapsing onto my body, he placed a soft kiss to my chest where my heart was pounding beneath my sweat slicked skin before resting his cheek there and sighing in contentment. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and spread my fingers through his hair, gently scratching his scalp.

"I love you, Edward. I have never known such happiness as I do in your arms."

"As I love you, my Bella."


	34. Happiness and Health

**I own nothing.**

**For some reason, FF is not sending my email notifications and it is beyond frustrating! I do check for reviews and LOVE to hear from you. Thank you for your kind words – they really do make me happy.**

**Ummm…with only about three or four chapters to go, I had not planned on writing any more lemons after the last chapter. But after reading reviews from the last chapter I could not help myself…. BAMAGAL110, THE KITCHEN IS FOR YOU.**

BPOV

The next few days were a whirlwind of activity as we enjoyed rich meals, the opera, various art and sculpture exhibits, and a performance of the symphony that brought me to tears. Edward was always attentive and generous, watching with glee my varied reactions to everyday life in Paris.

Our trunks had been repacked and were strapped in place on the carriage for the next portion of our travels. Edward was evasive when asked exactly where we were headed. He would only answer with a sly grin and tell me I would enjoy it immensely. He seemed so carefree and happy and I was thrilled to simply enjoy this boyish side of my husband.

We boarded the carriage following the morning meal and set off toward the center of the city, an area I was now familiar with as we had spent many hours that first day in the little shops of the marketplace. Arriving outside of the little dress shop, Edward bid me remain in the carriage, kissed the tip of my nose and quickly disembarked the carriage to head into the quaint little store.

Returning only minutes later, he held a large pink rectangular box in his hands, which he immediately placed under his seat. He quirked a brow at my quizzical look and warned, "No peeking."

"I will promise not to peek, if you will promise that you have not purchased a shirt with that impressive lace. I do not think it flattering for you at all."

He laughed heartily before claiming my mouth with his own as the carriage pulled up to yet another shop. A confectionary. I had been presented with bon-bons as a child very rarely and I had certainly had none since leaving Collingsworth with my father. I could not help but hope that Edward planned to purchase the simple candies. Once again, he winked at me as he exited the carriage, returning a short time later with yet another box. He would allow no peeking into this one as well.

Having obtained all of his trinkets, we set out on the open road, heading to yet another surprise. We stopped for a mid-day meal along the way where Edward informed me that it would be very late when we arrived at our destination and that the house would have limited staff for the duration of our stay.

"Is there always a limited staff, or was this your instruction?"

"The house has been closed up for some time. Jasper made inquiries regarding personnel for the house and I have made a hire for our stay. We will have only a housekeeper who will also cook. Our driver and footman will be more than able to handle the livery and such." Reaching across our meal, he took my hand in his and met my eyes, "I wish to have you to myself with little interference, my love. I have merely taken steps to ensure that occurs."

I could feel the blush rise and averted my eyes from his. He would have none of it though, and quickly grasped my chin in his gentle fingers, pulling my face back to his and kissing me softly. I knew exactly what he meant. We were always surrounded by people, whether it be family or staff, and it would be a pleasant change to be alone and uninhibited for a while.

Packing the remnants of our meal, we once again boarded the carriage and set out for the last bit of travel. With the gentle sway of the carriage and Edward's warmth beside me, I found it difficult to keep my eyes open. Edward lifted his arm to wrap it around my shoulder and pull me into his side, covering my lap with a blanket as I drifted off to sleep.

I had no way of knowing what the hour was when we arrived at the house. Edward attempted to lift me from the carriage and carry me into the entry, but I had a great desire to see our temporary home. Placing me on the ground, he gestured to the very large house before us, "Welcome to Cullen Cottage."

"Cottage? Edward, my father and I lived in a cottage, this home is much more than a cottage!"

He laughed softly as he nodded, "That is true. We have always called it a cottage as it is so much smaller than Whitfield. We came here in the summer as children. Even when my father was unable, my mother would bring us to stay and enjoy time away from the bustle of our normal lives."

The house was three stories and was covered in beautiful stonework. As we stepped inside the foyer, an older woman with a kind smile stood just to the side, but presented herself quickly upon our entry.

"Good evening, sir. I trust your trip was pleasant?"

Edward surprised me as he stepped forward, grasping her hands and kissing her cheek. "Hello, Mimi, how are you?"

"Much better now that I have laid my old eyes on you once more. And will you introduce me to this dear girl?"

Edward held out his hand which I grasped quickly. Pulling me forward and into his side, he smiled widely as he spoke. "Mimi, this is my wife, Isabella. Bella, this is Eleanor Meyer, or as we affectionately call her, Mimi."

Mimi rushed forward, pulling me from the security of Edward's arm and wrapping me in hers as she greeted me. "Isabella, I cannot tell you how thrilled I am to meet you. I have adored this boy since his birth and I expect you will inform me immediately should he misbehave."

I could not help but giggle at her words. She spoke as though he were a little boy and expected him to find or cause trouble. Before I could respond, she quickly pressed me back toward Edward and turned away from us, making her way out of the entryway.

"You must be ready to retire. You will find all that you need already prepared and I will send your meal up when you ring in the morning. Sleep well." Her words trailed off just as the light also disappeared as she left us standing near the staircase. Edward leaned close, pressing his lips to my ear.

"To be clear, I plan on misbehaving a great deal, Isabella. However, I sincerely hope you will not speak of it with Mimi as I am certain it would cause great scandal." The moment he stopped speaking, his mouth covered mine and he lifted me into his arms, carrying me toward the stairs. "For now, I will tuck you in securely and bid you sleep well for I have a great many plans for you, love."

The sun was already high in the sky when I woke the next morning. Turning my body, I reached out expecting to encounter my husband's warm body, but to my dismay, found only cool linens. Opening my eyes and lifting my head from my pillow, I found Edward standing near the window, sipping a cup of tea. Hearing me stir, he turned his head toward me, grinning widely.

"It is a more perfect day than I could have hoped for, my Bella. Come, have some tea and food and then dress, for I have much to show you today." His excitement was palpable and I could not help but smile in response. He truly was behaving like a young boy, carefree and without caution. I could not remember ever having encountered this side of him.

We ate quickly and I dressed while Edward made arrangements for out mid-day meal. Once all had been settled, he summoned me to meet him in the gardens behind the house.

"I will show you the house and grounds this evening, but I can wait no longer to bring you to the place I loved most as a child."

Grasping my hand, he pulled me behind him as he all but ran down a narrow stone path leading from the back of the house. We rose over a slight incline where Edward came to an abrupt halt, turning immediately to watch my face carefully. I kept my eyes on his, distracted by the joy and lightness of heart I saw there. After a moment, he gently grasped my chin in his fingers and turned my face outward.

"Look, Bella."

The air I sucked in was damp and salty on my tongue as my eyes struggled to take in the beauty before me. A low outcropping of rock to my right, leading right up to the water's edge as the waves rolled gently in to the shore. The sun was bright overhead and caused the water to shimmer and sparkle, seeming to dance in the light. There was no end to it on the horizon, and while I knew this is what it must look like, it was still more beautiful than I could have imagined. My words were simply a breathed whisper.

"Stunningly beautiful."

"Yes, I believe so." I turned to find Edward's staring not at the water, but me. Smiling shyly, I turned my attention back to the gently rolling ocean before me. Edward grasped my hand and pulled me toward the rocks. "Sit here."

I sat and he immediately knelt and removed my shoes. He was already removing his own and it was only a moment before he stood smirking and barefoot before me, holding my shoes just out of reach as I tried to retrieve them.

"No, no. You cannot stand on the shore without feeling the sand in your toes. I insist." I stood and took his hand in my own, following as he led me closer to the water. The sand became more dense and wet as we walked to the water's edge. Edward leaned forward and pulled my skirts up and away from the love waves washing over my toes. I could not help but giggle at the strange sensation. Edward smiled and chuckled at my mirth. Nodding his head in the direction of the rocks, he bid me follow him.

When we reached the outcropping of grey stone, he pulled me under the edge and toward the back. The walls were curved and we could almost stand upright, but even in the bright sunlight of the morning, it was still dark and damp. Edward was scanning the walls as though he had memories imbedded there somehow. Turning his eyes back toward the opening of the cave-like structure, he became reflective.

"I used to come here as a child. When Emmett frustrated me to fury, or Alice was beyond bearing, I came here to hide. To think. To have solitude. It felt safe here."

"It is beautiful."

"It is a cave, Bella. There is nothing of beauty in cold, grey stone."

"It is beautiful because it means something to you. Thank you for sharing your memories with me."

"Thank you for coming here with me. Without your shoes."

We both laughed and the sound was wondrous in the small cave. He had shared something of himself with me. Something personal and precious. I knew in that moment that there would be no more secrets between us. No more fears or doubts. He loved me and for the first time, I felt truly secure and safe in that knowledge. Even if I never gave him a child, he loved me. Regardless of the estate issues, he loved me.

"Bella?" I lifted my eyes and found Edward watching me with a worried eye. He brought his hand up to wipe away tears I had not known were falling. "What is it?"

"They are happy tears, Edward. I have never been more happy than I am in this moment. My life is perfect and you love me."

"Truly, I do. _Our _life is perfect, Bella. We have the world before us and I intend to give it to you."

We stood for some time wrapped in each other's arms, enjoying the closeness and privacy. All too soon, however, my belly growled causing a fit of laughter from my husband. We left the security of our cave and began the walk back to the house.

Many of our days here were spent enjoying long walks on the beach, collecting small shells and stones that I intended to place in the rose garden upon our return to Collingsworth. Edward spent the better part of an afternoon attempting to teach me how to dig for clams. I was extremely hesitant in the beginning as I could not bring myself to wiggle my toes down into the sand, especially not knowing what might lie buried there. However, once I grew comfortable with it, I consistently unearthed more of them than Edward, to his dismay. It became a game of sorts, with him rushing over and digging his feet under mine when I found one, claiming it for his own. On more than one evening, we carried a basket full of them back to the house where Mimi created the most wonderful meals with our harvest.

It was after one of these feasts, on an unseasonably cool evening, that Edward lit a small fire in the hearth before excusing himself from the room. In his absence, I tossed the pillows and cushions on the floor before the fire, creating a cozy place for us to recline. He returned with a book of sonnets and the small box from the confectionary in Paris.

"What have you there, Mr. Cullen?"

"Ah, but if I tell you, it will ruin the surprise of it." He seated himself on the floor, reclining on the cushions and inviting me to sit on the floor between his outstretched legs. Once we were comfortable, he leaned in close, whispering in that deep, quiet voice that I loved so well, "Close your eyes, Isabella."

I did as he asked and felt a slight pressure against my lips. His fingers gently slid a small, smooth bit of heaven into my mouth. My eyes popped open and met his as the flavor exploded on my tongue.

"Mmmmm… that is glorious. What is it?"

"Chocolate with orange oil. You enjoy it, then?"

"Very much. Did you taste it?"

"I believe I will." His mouth consumed mine then. His lips insistent and his tongue sliding, probing as his hand came up to cup my cheek, holding me to him. I was overwhelmed with sensation as he pulled me closer against him and moaned softly into my mouth. He broke the kiss and pressed his face into my shoulder as we both worked to slow our breathing. Once I was able to form a coherent thought, I asked him the obvious question.

"You enjoy it as well? The chocolate?"

"Hmmm… very much."

"How many of them did you purchase?"

"Not enough, my love, not nearly enough." He smiled wickedly at my wide eyes before shifting me and urging me to stand. "You have another surprise on our bed. Well, in truth, I believe it is more for me than you, but I believe you will be pleased with it as well. Go. I shall join you in a few minutes."

I rose and made my way to our room where I found the pink box from the dress shop resting on the bed. A single red rose lay across the top.

Laying the rose aside and lifting the top, I was not expecting what I found inside. A white silk and chiffon nightgown and matching robe lay softly wrapped in muslin. They were trimmed with the exquisite embroidered lace that I had admired in the shop, as well as the tiniest of pearls and satin ribbon. It was more beautiful than anything I had ever owned and I stood staring at it in awe for some time before removing my clothes to put it on.

I felt like royalty, draped in the soft, flowing fabric. However, there was nothing that could have prepared me for what I felt when Edward entered the room. I felt beautiful as his eyes took me in from head to toe. He closed the distance between us, reaching up to caress my silk covered shoulder. Licking his lips, he spoke in a gruff whisper, "Bella, I have no words."

Leaning down toward me, he placed a warm, wet kiss on my shoulder where silk met skin. Sadly, as beautiful as it was, I did not wear my new nightgown that night.

* * * A H R * * *

"I do not wish to leave."

"I know, love. We will return soon. I promise."

I lay cradled in Edward's arms, my back against his chest, as he lazily stroked his fingers across my belly and hip. We were leaving in the morning to return to Collingsworth. In the many weeks that we had been gone, the harvest had begun and Edward would need to oversee the completion of it and the sale of the grains, as well as meeting with the farmers to determine when the fall planting would begin.

I had grown to love it here where we could be relaxed with one another. As though he were able to read my thoughts, Edward spoke, "Promise me something in return."

"Anything."

"Promise me that we will remain as we are now. You have grown so comfortable with me, Bella. You are able to speak your mind when you disagree or are angry with me. You are no longer hesitant to tell me what troubles you. You allow me to care for you, body, mind and soul. Promise me that this will continue when we leave here."

Turning in his arms to face him, I held his eyes as I gave him my simple answer.

"I promise." I no longer had any struggle or worry with Edward. I knew he loved me, treasured me as much as I did him. I had come to understand how it hurt him for me to hold all my difficulties inside. We carried one another's burdens now as much as we shared our happiness.

Pressing a soft kiss to my forehead, he tucked my head under his chin. "Thank you, love. Sleep now, we have a long day tomorrow."

I woke to a dark room, save the moonlight coming in the windows. Edward breathed evenly beside me and I knew he slept still. Confused for a moment about why I had awoken, it became clear when my belly grumbled. I had eaten little at dinner, being exhausted from packing and a final walk on the beach. Rising from the bed, I determined to get some bread and perhaps some milk.

Not wishing to wake Edward while stumbling around in the dark, I pulled the sheet from the bed, wrapping it around my body and tucking it in on itself to secure it to me. I quickly made my way downstairs and into the kitchen. Pulling out some bread left from dinner, and gathering a cup of water and some cheese, I stood beside the work table, nibbling in silence. The room was quiet and dark, the only light shining from my candle before me on the table. I was startled when I heard the creak of the door and the soft illumination of another candle. Edward entered the room, standing silently across the room wearing only his trousers. He walked slowly toward me as he spoke.

"Bella? Are you well?"

"I was hungry. I did not mean to wake you."

"Hungry?"

"I was. I think I am satisfied now." His eyes darkened as his eyes roamed to where the sheet covered my chest. He was standing close enough that I could feel the warmth of his breath on my cheek. He moved slowly, removing the remnants of my late night meal from the table, placing them on the counter behind him. Turning again to press against my back, he pulled the hair from my shoulder, exposing the length of my neck and shoulder to his lips, tongue and teeth. Working me gently with his mouth, his arms wrapped around me, one at my waist, the other at my chest, slipping his hand inside the sheet, loosening it from my body.

"And are you willing to satisfy me now?" I shivered at his words, attempting to turn to face him. He held me firm, my back against his chest as he brought his lips to my ear, sucking the lobe into his mouth before biting gently. "No, Bella. I want to take you like this, right here."

"Edward, I…I" I felt my body tense at his words, not knowing exactly what he wanted or expected of me. We had always held each other, face to face, to make love. I was unsure how this was to happen.

"Shhh, Bella. Trust me." I did trust him. He would not hurt me. I relaxed back into him as the sheet covering my body fell to the floor. His hands blindly explored my body as his mouth sucked, licked and kissed my back, shoulders and neck. As he kissed across my jaw, I turned my face to him, kissing him deeply as he pressed his fingers into my body. I rocked my hips, pressing against his hand as my head fell back against his shoulder.

"God, Bella, how I love your body." I nearly collapsed forward at his words, catching myself with my open hands splayed out on the table. Edward brought his hands to my hips to steady me, then sliding them down my legs as he lowered himself behind me. He placed wet kisses to my lower back, trailing them down my spine and onto my backside. Reaching my ankle, he lifted it and placed my foot on the workstool beside the table. Kissing his way back up my body, I registered the sound of his trousers falling to the floor as his lips once again found my neck.

Smoothing his hands down my arms, he pressed my hands to the table, while pressing his foot against my ankle, widening my stance as I felt him sliding against me, hot and slick. Using the leverage of my hands on the table, I pushed back against him as I begged, "Please, Edward, I need… please."

"I know, baby, I know. Lean forward." Using one hand, he pressed my back, urging me to lean onto the table, while he used the other to guide himself as he pressed into me from behind. Edward stilled as I sucked in a sharp breath. "Bella?"

"Yes, please. Yes." With a groan, he braced one hand on the table as he pushed into me, bringing himself flush with my backside. In all of the times that our bodies had been joined, never had he been so deep within me. Never had I felt him entirely surrounding me and possessing me as he did now. He pulled away, then thrust forward once again, grunting softly in my ear. Reaching back, I ran my fingers up into his hair, tugging gently as he rocked steadily into me. "Oh…so much, Edward…oh…never knew…"

My thoughts were tumbling from my lips as the pleasure built in my body. Edward had moved to brace one hand on my hip and the other wrapped around my breast to the opposite shoulder, pulling me back onto him as he thrust forward. The sweat glistening from our bodies in the candlelight caused our bodies to slide together smoothly and the only sounds in the room were my random utterances and Edwards soft grunts and occasional moans. I felt as though I might fly apart at any moment as my entire body began to shake and my hands flailed about, searching for something to hold onto.

Edward's hands caught mine, entwining our fingers as he thrust harder and faster into me. "Let go, Bella. I want it." Crying out, shaking, and gasping for air, I felt my body lock down on him as pleasure overtook me such as I had never known. Edward thrust twice more before he groaned in release, burying his face between my shoulders.

When I regained the ability to speak coherently, I turned my head, meeting his eyes. "I did not know you could join that way. How did you think of it?"

Edward chuckled at my naïve thoughts and answered with a question. "Was it pleasurable?" I nodded and he continued, "Our bodies can join any way we are willing to try, so long as it is comfortable and pleasurable."

"I am willing to try that one again."

Edward laughed loudly at my answer and pulled me to stand, wrapping me once again in the sheet before leading me back to our bed.

* * * A H R * * *

"Bella, sweetheart, I need you to open your eyes." I fought to open my tired eyes as I felt his fingertips trace gently along my cheek. Slowly rolling my body toward his side of the bed, I was struck by two things as my eyes finally opened and focused. One, he was not in the bed, and two, I was very disoriented. Lifting my gaze, I found Edward fully dressed, sitting on the edge of the bed as he stroked his hand up and down my arm.

"How long have you been awake?"

"For some time, love. I could not bear to wake you after keeping you up so late last night. Are you well?"

"I am a bit lightheaded, but perhaps that is because I have overslept."

"I must see to the carriage. Mimi has something ready for you to eat in the kitchen. Perhaps that will help you feel better." Pressing a kiss to the top of my head, Edward stood and left the room as I rose to wash and dress for our trip.

Some time later, after our goodbyes to Mimi, we were settled into the carriage and traveling at a good pace. I had felt a bit better once I had some food in my belly and came to the conclusion that I must simply be exhausted. Even now I struggled to keep my eyes open. Of course, Edward noticed and pulled my head to rest in his lap. It was only moments before sleep found me once again.

The carriage lurched forward, startling me awake. No, that was not right. Something was not right. The realization of what was about to happen caused me to jump up, reaching for the door of the carriage.

"Stop the carriage, please!"

Edward rapped sharply on the side of the carriage and it came to a sudden halt. He grasped my arm as I pushed open the door.

"Unhand me, Edward!" Shrugging from his hold, I stumbled from the carriage, onto the side of the road where my body heaved and shook as my belly expelled it's contents into the grass.

EPOV

"Unhand me, Edward!"

Stunned, I watched as she all but fell to the ground in her attempt to leave the carriage. Stumbling just off the road, she retched and heaved, dropping to her knees and vomiting repeatedly as I stood horrified and helpless.

Reaching into my coat pocket, I pulled out my handkerchief. Kneeling beside her, I held it within her sight as I brushed the hair from her face. "Bella?"

Turning her eyes from mine, she sniffled, "Please do not look at me. I am mortified, Edward. Please return to the carriage."

Looking up to gain Eric's attention, I asked him to bring a flask of water, then turned my attention back to Bella. Placing my hand against her cheek, I lifted her face and turned it to face me. She was crying and was so pale that her reddened eyes were a shocking contrast to her damp skin. Using the cloth, I gently wiped her eyes and cheeks. Eric stepped forward with the flask, which I opened quickly, pouring some water on the cloth before handing the flask to Bella, encouraging her to rinse her mouth. I pressed the cool, damp handkerchief to the back of her neck before once again wiping over her face. After a moment, she seemed a little more composed.

"I am sorry, Edward."

"What a silly thing to apologize for. You cannot help being ill, Bella."

"I meant for speaking to you in such an abrupt manner. I did not wish to be sick in the carriage."

"Think no more of it, love. Has your belly settled? Do you wish to continue, or would you prefer to rest a while?"

"No, let us continue. I think I should like to get some more sleep."

* * * A H R * * *

We had been traveling for days and there was no end in sight. As a man, my frustration stemmed from needing to accomplish this goal. As a husband, my frustration was entirely founded in my helplessness to alleviate Isabella's suffering. She slept for much of the travels. The difficulty occurred when she woke. She had been unable to retain anything she had eaten since we left Cullen Cottage, and I was determined that we would see a physician if it persisted. She argued in the beginning, but as she continued to heave with sore muscles, she finally relented.

We were waiting in the small outer office of a local town doctor, hoping he might be able to right Bella's body once again.

"Mrs. Cullen?" Bella lifted her head from my shoulder, rising from the chair to follow an older gentleman into the next room. A few minutes later, he stepped into the room once again, asking his wife to join him with my Bella. I began to pace the length of the room as I waited.

She had become my entire life and I found myself at a loss as to how to assist her when she was so ill. My mind was racing, trying to determine what might be wrong and what must be done to fix it. I did not hear the doctor until he was standing before me with a hand on my arm.

"Mr. Cullen? Are you well, sir?"

"Yes, thank you. Forgive me, I was lost to my thoughts. Have you determined the cause of Isabella's illness?"

"I have. You should go to your wife, sir. She will explain it."

"The illness will cease?"

"Unfortunately, no, it will not. There is nothing to be done. Go to your wife, sir. She wishes to see you."

His cryptic words were alarming and I took a moment to bring myself under control before entering the room. Bella sat on a small sofa, sipping some tea that smelled strongly of ginger. The doctor's wife stood to one side of the sofa, teacup in hand.

"Bella, you have to talk to me, love. What has the good doctor told you?"

Her eyes met mine and immediately filled with tears, causing alarm to well up inside me. Kneeling before her, I took her hands in mine, keeping my eyes locked with hers. As tears spilled over pale cheeks, she brought my hands to rest beneath hers on her belly. Smiling widely through her tears, she spoke the words that would forever change our lives.

"Edward, I carry your child within me."


	35. Passing Time and Pressing Forward

**I don't own anything.**

**Sorry it has taken me so long to update. I could tell you all the reasons why, but really, I know you just want the chapter. Thank you so much to those of you who have reviewed and left me such great words of encouragement. I appreciate it more than you could ever know.**

EPOV

"Thank you, Mrs. Cope."

Relieving her of the tray, I crossed the room to the bedside where my Bella still slept. It had been a peaceful night for her, which had been a rare occurrence as of late. She seemed to be hungry only in the middle of the night and would most always go in search of some sustenance in the kitchen. It would not hold, however, and by the time she found her way back to our room, she would be ill and expel all she had eaten before falling into a fitful sleep once again. It was a vicious cycle, and when my mother learned of it, she had been appalled.

"_Has no one explained this to you, Isabella?"_

"_No, I have not had the comfort of a woman's knowledge for this. I do not mean to be a trouble, Esme."_

"_Nonsense. I should have seen to it earlier. Forgive me, Isabella, for neglecting to remember that you would not have benefitted from a mother's knowledge."_

"_I have that now, though, haven't I?"_

My mother had been reduced to tears at Bella's acceptance of her as a mother, especially when her grandchild was involved. She was quick to instruct Bella as to how to care for herself and our unborn child. She was to always have salted wafers and ginger tea in the morning before even rising from the bed. She was to have several small meals throughout the day, keeping something in her belly at all times. She was to sleep as much as needed.

There were a multitude of instructions, rules and guidelines to follow and I wondered at how we were to remember all of them. They did, however, seem to work magic and after a few weeks, Bella had begun to look herself. Her color returned and she was able to keep her meals down. In fact, she seemed to glow as her skin had become rosy and luminescent. She was beautiful.

Pouring her tea, the aroma reminded me of the moment we learned of her pregnancy. She had been sipping this same ginger tea in the old doctor's sitting room and I was filled with fear for her health. When she informed me of the cause of her illness, I was overcome with emotion.

"_Edward, I carry your child within me."_

_I stared at her a moment before dropping my gaze to where our hands were pressed against her belly. Where she carried our child. Our baby._

"_Please, say something. Are you pleased?"_

_Lifting my gaze to meet hers, I swallowed the thickness in my throat as I fought the tears that tried to escape._

"_How could I not be pleased? You offer me what no one else ever has or will. You offer me the chance to be a father, to have life beyond my own. I love you, my Bella."_

_Grasping her face gently between my hands, I brushed my lips across hers before kissing away the remnants of her happy tears. The doctor's wife had kindly left us alone for a while as we reveled in our joyous news. When she returned, she made the offer of lodging with them for the night so that Bella might rest and I might secure some ginger tea for the remainder of our trip._

I had tried unconvincingly to persuade Bella to stop our travels until she felt better, which the doctor claimed would be no more than a few weeks. It seemed as though our child had been conceived before we even began our travels and we had both been thankful that she had not become ill earlier in the trip. Bella would not be persuaded, claiming that she would much rather be in the comfort of our own home. Our travels were slow and at times even tortuous as the constant motion of the carriage did nothing to alleviate her nausea. We stopped often and took twice the number of days on the return as we had on our departure.

I had sent letters to the estate to inform my family of our happy news and to inform my father of the lateness of our arrival. He was more than happy to attend to the harvest in my stead. I would be home in time to see to the markets. Jasper and Alice had returned home with Anna and Emmett and Rosalie would be visiting once again when the harvest was complete at her parents estate. They would be traveling throughout the fall, so this would be our last visit before they returned to Collingsworth for the Winter Ball.

I reached out to gently brush the hair from her face, "Bella, wake up sweetheart."

She drew in a long slow breath before opening her eyes and fixing her gaze on me. Smiling, she reached up to grasp my hand, bringing it to her lips. "Good morning, husband."

Standing, I arranged her pillows as she sat up and leaned back into them. Placing the cup in her hands, I urged her to drink as I began to give her news that I knew she would be excited to hear.

"Jasper has secured a tutor for us. He was recommended by Pastor Webber and comes with letters of commendation from his last post. It seems that he intends to settle here as he has formed an attachment to Miss Webber as well as the local town. His name is Benjamin Cheney and he will arrive this afternoon to make our acquaintance."

Her smile was radiant. "We will have a tutor and a betrothal! Will you inquire whether Angela will accompany him? It has been so long since I have seen her."

"I will inquire and offer to send a chaperone if that will assist her to visit. Now, tell me, how are you and our child faring this morning?"

"I am well, Edward, thank you." She continued to sip her tea slowly as I told her of all that had been done to ready the cottage for the lessons that would begin when the fall planting was complete.

When she finished, she washed and dressed for the day as I finished up some paperwork in my study and prepared some correspondence that would need to post in the next few days. With the harvest at completion, there was little for me to oversee until we went to the markets in only a few days. My father would be here so I had no worry for my Bella's safety, but I did not relish the thought of leaving her throughout those days.

By the early afternoon, my mother had taken the carriage to bring Ben and Angela to Collingsworth for our visit. Bella was beyond thrilled to see her friend and Ben seemed a kind and patient man. I could see where his chosen occupation would be a well suited one for his temperament. Leaving the ladies to their tea and giggles, Ben and I toured the cottage where he would spend most of his days as well as the surrounding areas. He did indeed confirm to me that upon his employment with us, he intended to seek Miss Webber's hand. I congratulated him on his good fortune at having found his wife and employer in one attempt.

After a pleasant meal with our friends, my father and I accompanied them back to the Webber home as my mother and Bella continued their enjoyable task of creating a tiny wardrobe for our child. Upon our departure from the Webber's home, my father chuckled lightly, breaking the silence between us.

"What amuses you, old man?" I smirked at him, waiting for the teasing I believed would come.

"You. You amuse me, Edward. It was merely a year ago that you refused to consider a wife. I believe you claimed it was 'too great a responsibility' to care for another person. I wonder if that is still your assessment."

"I think we both know it is not. I will gladly admit that I was sorely mistaken. I have found no greater joy than I have with Isabella. I was a fool to believe otherwise."

"You are content."

"I am."

"You will be a fine father, Edward. You have become a kind, generous and fair man. Your child will be blessed to have that example. I am proud of you, son."

"Thank you, sir." I was humbled by his words and if anything, they inspired me to become more like him. I wanted to be the man he believed me to be and that he could be proud of. To hear him offer his affirmation was something I did not take lightly.

The remainder of our ride was in quiet contemplation. It was only when we turned onto the lane leading to the manor that he spoke again, "Emmett will inherit the estate of Rosalie's parents. They have named him as their sole heir."

"He spoke of it when they were here. I am not surprised."

"Edward, you will inherit Whitfield."

I was stunned and immediately began to object on Emmett's behalf. My father held up his hand to bring a halt to my words, "I have already spoken to Emmett at length regarding this matter. His wealth will be extensive and he fears that Whitfield will not have the attention it needs. He is content with my decision. I speak of it only so that you will know our intentions. I will begin to include you on the workings of the estate so that you will not inherit unaware."

"I do not know what to say."

"Nothing needs to be said, son. I know you will handle it wisely."

We were lost to our thoughts as we arrived, excusing ourselves to our wives for the night. I did not intend to speak of it to Bella that night as I still struggled to comprehend what I had been offered and she had already settled into bed for the night when we arrived home.

* * * A H R * * *

The next several weeks passed quickly as the sale at market was settled, the tutor settled into his home and began purchasing supplies he would need to begin, and we prepared to oversee the fall planting. There had still been no information regarding James Smith. It appeared that he was staying clear of the area for now, but of course, we could not be certain. We had received word that Garrett and Kate Denali had collected Tanya from the convent and were attempting to console her as her infant son had died due to complications from his premature birth. This bit of information had upset Bella immensely. Upon learning of the child's death, she had been devastated and wept intermittently for days. My mother had encouraged me to be a comfort to her and to not be alarmed as her mood would be affected by the pregnancy. It was her sudden changes in mood that left me reeling and somewhat dizzy on most days.

My favorite occurrence during this time was the outward changes in my Bella. It had been several weeks since we had been intimate with one another as her health had made it difficult. So it was somewhat startling when I found her in bed one evening waiting for my arrival with nothing between us but the sheets. Her beautiful body was now glorious. Her breasts were a bit larger and more round, her skin was fairly glowing and her hips were more full and had a fine curve that begged to be caressed. She was kind enough to allow me the pleasure of exploring her newly acquired curves as often as I wished. Her overly sensitive body would provide her with much pleasure as well.

However, it was the area between her hip bones that enthralled me more than any other. The slight swell that indicated our child was real and growing held my attention more than any other part of her body – which in and of itself was a surprising revelation. I found myself gently caressing her gently swelling belly on most nights as I fell asleep. We had once again taken to sleeping skin to skin and my hands would always find rest – one on her breast, the other on our child within her.

As my mother had predicted, her emotions seemed to run wild most days. She would laugh one moment and weep the next. She was prone to be red with anger at times as well. I found it best to go for a walk or ride in those moments while waiting for her mood to alter once again.

The weather was changing once again as the days began to grow shorter. The fall planting was to be completed this week and the education of the tenant children would begin early next week. All preparations had been completed and Bella was beside herself with excitement over the prospect of providing a better life to those who chose to take advantage of her kindness. We were expecting a visit from Emmett and Rosalie as well. They were to arrive this afternoon and stay for a week before returning to their home for the winter months. Bella woke this morning feeling well and in a pleasant humor, so it was with no small amount of concern that I found her in the sitting room, weeping quietly as she clutched her sewing to her chest.

"What has upset you, love?" I sat beside her on the sofa, gently taking her hand in mine.

"I – I…" Try as she might, she could not bring herself to speak as she continued to weep. I wrapped her in my arms and held her as she cried softly. Glancing down to the fabric she held, I knew at once what had caused her distress.

"These were your father's shirts?"

Lifting her face to me, I was broken by the utter sadness I saw in her eyes. "I miss him so much. I will birth a child who will never know him. A child he will never hold in his arms."

"Oh, Bella. I am so sorry, sweetheart. I had not considered your grief for him as it concerned our child."

I knew there was nothing I could do to ease her pain, so I continued to hold her as she slowly regained her composure. After a moment, she sat upright and wiped the tears from her cheeks, reaching forward to grasp her scissors. She quickly began to shred through the soft blue cotton shirt. Alarmed, I grasped her wrist to still her hand.

"What are you doing?"

She startled me somewhat as she smiled up at me with her reply, "This was always my intention for these garments. It is why I chose to keep them. My father will not see his grandchild, but it will feel, to me, as though he is able to hold the child in his arms if he is wrapped in a quilt made from the cloth of my father's shirts." She lowered her eyes to the cloth in her lap, seemingly embarrassed by her admission. "Does that sound silly to you?"

She truly was an amazing creature. My thoughts of her immediately brought to mind images of steele draped in silk. She was unfathomable strength wrapped in delicate softness.

"No, love, it is not silly. I think it a brilliant idea." Her smile was glorious and I could not help but be overwhelmed with tenderness toward her. Cupping her chin in my hand, I brought my lips to hers for a chaste kiss. "Now, I have some things to discuss with you. First, I must ask why you referred to our child as a male. Have you some mother's knowledge I am unaware of?"

She seemed confused for a moment before understanding dawned and caused a shy smile to grace her features. "I have no such knowledge. I simply see a son in my arms when I think of him. Have you a preference?"

"I do not. I would be content with either a son or a daughter. Have you considered a name at all?"

"I assumed you would wish to name your firstborn son. I will agree to whatever you choose so long as it is reasonable, of course."

"Of course." I could not help but smile at her sweet expression. It quickly turned pensive as she averted her eyes before speaking.

"I have considered a name for a daughter. I will, of course, be willing to entertain any names that you wish to consider."

"And what is it you would like to call our daughter?"

"Elizabeth. We could call her by her full name, or Lizzie, or even Beth. I have been partial to that name since I was a girl. What are your thoughts?"

I considered the name for a moment. "Elizabeth. Well, it does roll gently from the lips. I should enjoy calling after our daughter by that name. Elizabeth it is." She grinned widely and leaned in to press her lips to mine for a quick kiss. "However, that does leave me with the added responsibility to choose a name for our son. Will you allow me some time to consider a good choice?"

"I assumed you would wish to give him your name. Is that not what you desire?"

"Hmmm. Well, that is a definite possibility, however, I wish to consider it further before settling on it." In truth, I knew exactly what I wished to call him, should it be a boy, but I would wait for the opportune moment to reveal it to her. I did not believe she would disagree with me, but I would need to be careful how I offered it to her. For now, I had another matter to discuss.

"Isabella, I need to be away from the estate for a couple of days. I must sign some legal documents that Jasper has prepared for me concerning property issues. He cannot leave as his workload is overwhelming at the moment and has asked me to come to him. I will stay with Alice and Jasper and return to you as quickly as possible. Emmett's arrival this afternoon has given me the opportune moment to travel as that would leave you with protection while I am away."

I watched for a moment as she processed what I had spoken. After a bit, she nodded decidedly. "Of course, Edward. You cannot halt all of your business dealings and responsibilities to stand guard over me at all times. I will be fine and I will heed any instuctions given by Emmett or your father that concern my safety. Go, and return to me quickly."

BPOV

Truthfully, I dreaded his departure more than I would ever say. I had become so accustomed to his presence with me that it was difficult to imagine him being away from me even for a couple of days. I could not allow him to see any affect it had on me, so I smiled and put on a brave face.

"How soon will you go?"

"I will leave this afternoon if you are willing. I will attend to all business matters tomorrow and return by the mid-day meal the day after tomorrow."

I gave him a wide, genuine smile, "Very well then, husband. Go and return to me quickly."

A few hours later, Emmett, Rosalie and Emma arrived and the house was filled with joyful greetings as Emma squealed with delight about the pending arrival of another cousin. She placed her tiny hands on my belly before frowning up at me, "Your baby will be much smaller than Aunt Alice's baby. Her belly was so big!"

We all shared a laugh at her sweet innocence. I knelt down, meeting her eye to eye.

"It will be a few more months before my baby will come. By then, my belly will be as big as Aunt Alice's."

Her eyes widened for a moment before her entire face fell and her lips formed an adorable pout. "I wanted to play with the baby. It takes too long!"

Once again we could not contain our laughter at her expense as Rosalie stepped forward, ushering Emma upstairs to settle in and change from her traveling clothes. After their departure, Emmett embraced me before placing a kiss on my cheek. "You look well, sister."

"Thank you, Emmett. It is good to see you."

"Of course it is!"

I had missed his jovial spirit and did not realize until this moment how much I looked forward to his visit. After a few more minutes of greeting and laughter, Emmett excused himself to change and prepare for the evening meal. Edward grasped my hand in his and led me to the conservatory. I knew what was coming and worked desperately to stifle the tears I could feel coming.

Closing the door behind him, Edward immediately pulled me into his arms, claiming my lips with his own in a passionate kiss. I responded instantly, threading my fingers into his hair, holding him to me as though we would be separated for months rather than a few days. Pulling his mouth from mine, he pressed his face into my neck, inhaling deeply as he placed one hand on my belly and the other on the small of my back, holding me tightly against him. Try as I might, I could not keep silent.

"I do not wish you to go. I will miss you terribly."

Edward groaned against my skin before leaning back to face me. Placing his hand against my cheek, he smiled sadly, "I do not wish to leave you either, love, but I must go. I will return to you quickly. Tomorrow, if I am able."

I felt terrible for pressing him to feel as though he would need to shorten his trip. He would be exhausted to travel so much in only one day. "Please do not exhaust yourself. Keep your plans and return to me safely, Edward."

"I love you, my Bella."

"As I love you."

Kissing me softly once more, Edward then knelt before me, pressing his lips to my belly as he caressed it gently with his hands. "I love you, my little one. Behave yourself and cause your mother no discomfort." He turned his smile up at me as I ran my fingers through his hair.

Suddenly his eyes widened as he turned them back to my belly. I had felt the movements of our child for a couple of weeks now, but Edward had yet to feel the evidence of the life I carried. Apparently, he had felt something as he spoke to my belly once again.

"Please do it again, little one." Glancing quickly up at me, he asked, "Tell me what it was I felt, Bella. Please tell me that was our child." As if he heard and understood, our baby moved once again under Edward's hand. He turned his awestruck eyes up to me once again, "I will return tomorrow. I do not wish to miss a moment more than I must."

He kissed me once more before turning to go. I followed him to the front of the manor where his horse waited. He mounted and gave me one last gentle smile before setting off down the road away from the house. I watched until he was gone before retuning to the house.

After the evening meal, Emmett excused himself to see to some correspondence as Rosalie, Emma and I settled in the sitting room. Rosalie was teaching Emma some simple embroidery stitches as I worked on the baby's quilt. The squares had all been cut and I was piecing them together. Emma watched with rapt attention as I laid it out and prepared the pattern. Rosalie told me of the changes that were coming for them as they would move to her parent's estate in the spring. Her father was in poor health and wanted the transition to occur while he was still well enough to ensure everything was as it should be.

"Will it be difficult to manage your parent's estate as well as Whitfield Hall?"

Rosalie looked at me as though I had sprouted another set of arms. Her expression turned speculative as she asked, "Has Edward spoken to you about his inheritance?"

"No. We have not discussed property at all."

She simply nodded before turning her eyes back to her needlework. "Perhaps you should ask him about it, especially with a child coming. You will want to make certain that documents are in place to guarantee your child's inheritance. So, tell me of your preparations for the Winter Ball."

Her sudden change of topic was startling. I knew there was something to her words other than concern for our child's inheritance, but I also knew she would not discuss it with me as that was a matter between Edward and I. Bringing my thoughts back to the question at hand, I shared with her all that we had done.

"The invitations have already been printed and will be sent in a few weeks. We have settled the menu and decorations as well. Tyler has been given the responsibility to hire the extra staff needed for the preparations as well as the Ball itself. I really have very little left to contend with as Esme has been an invaluable help to me."

Rosalie nodded quickly, "Yes, she is truly amazing where matters of social function are concerned. How will you get along without her?"

Edward's parents were planning to leave when Emmett and Rosalie left at the end of the week. They would return the week of the Ball just as they had last year. We had teased them often that they should just stay as they had been with us for so many months already. They were insistent though, that they needed to get back to handle issues at their own estate. Carlisle had laughed and said that his employees would think that his overseer had become the new owner of Whitfield. They had decided also that Edward and I needed the remaining months alone before our child arrived. They would all come for the Ball, staying for the week of the event only.

"I have already begun to miss them. I cannot bear the thought of them leaving."

Rosalie gave me a knowing smile before glancing over at Emma, who had fallen asleep on the sofa. "I suppose I should get her to bed. I am certain she is exhausted from her travel and adventures today."

I smiled and nodded while watching the sweet child sleeping peacefully. I had hoped to spend some time with her in the morning and was worried that Rosalie would be nervous about allowing Emma to be alone with me after what had occurred last winter.

"Rosalie, I was wondering if you would allow Emma to help me tomorrow morning. I was hoping to spend some time in the rose garden to prepare it for winter. Do you think Emma would join me?"

Her smile was blinding. "I think Emma would be thrilled. Thank you for thinking of her." I blew out the breath I had been holding and smile gratefully back at her.

"Isabella, please know that I trust you implicitly with my daughter. You need never worry about my response to you for I have come to love you as a sister. In any case, Emma would never forgive me if I did not allow her to spend time with her favorite aunt." She reached out to grasp my hand, squeezing gently before releasing it and grinning widely, "But if you repeat that information to Alice, I will deny it entirely. She believes she is Emma's favorite."

We shared a laugh as she lifted Emma and carried her from the room. Placing my needlework in it's basket, I rang for Tyler, letting him know I was retiring for the evening.

As I settled into bed for the night, I realized it was the first time I had slept without Edward in the room since the night of the Winter Ball. I missed him terribly and fell into a fitful sleep.

When morning arrived, I rose and dressed, having slept only a couple of hours. I had not had nightmares in months, yet each time I closed my eyes in the night, the same horrifying dreams would come. I could only guess that it was my unconscious sadness at my husband's absence that was the cause.

The morning meal was a noisy affair as Emma was practically bouncing in her seat with excitement. She was anxious to explore the garden. The roses had long since ceased to bloom, but some of the other summer flowers had continued to bloom into the fall and made for a beautiful setting.

Carlisle and Esme were taking a carriage into town for some shopping and Rosalie had yet to decide whether she would go as well. Emmett would be using Edward's study to complete some paperwork, leaving Emma and I to explore and play. As I stood from the table, she grasped my hand and followed me to the small room beside the kitchen where I kept a basket full of gardening implements. I helped her find the smallest set of gloves and pruning shears. Gathering up the basket in one hand and grasping hers with the other, I led her out to the garden.

"I like the red ones, Aunt Isabella." Emma's little fingers were careful as she brushed them along the tops of the flowers.

"Hmmm. I like them too. Are they your favorites?"

"No. My favorite ones are the purple ones." I could not help but smile at her serious expression, as though the declaration was the most important of the day. Perhaps it was.

"Well, then, I suppose we should choose the most lovely red and purple ones to cut and bring inside. I am certain your Mommy would enjoy some fresh flowers for her room. What do you think?"

Her little face lit up and she vibrated excitement. "Yes! Yes, please. Mommy loves pretty flowers. May I bring her some now?"

I giggled at her eagerness. "I think she may have gone into town with your grandparents, but if you step inside and find Mr. Tyler, he can tell you for certain."

She jumped up, gathering the handful of flowers we had already cut and ran to the door. I could hear her shouting for Tyler as soon as it opened. Shaking my head, I hoped her mother did not hear her shouting as it was sure to earn her a scolding.

I continued cutting the tender blooms and placing them in my basket while waiting for her return. Looking up, I noticed the graying sky and the darkening clouds. We had been spoiled with pleasant weather for some time, but if the sky were any indication, we were in for quite a storm.

Placing my shears in my basket and removing my gloves, I stood and brushed the dust and grass from my skirt. I had not heard Emma when she left the house, but the sound of the garden gate behind me indicated she had returned.

"Well, well, Mrs. Cullen. I believe we are overdue for a little chat."

I could almost feel the blood in my veins run cold as I heard his voice. I did not need to turn to know exactly who had entered the garden. Taking a deep breath, I turned slowly and came face to face with a slightly emaciated, wild-eyed James Smith.

**Okay, I am going to duck now while you throw things…. **

**I promise not to take so long to update. As a matter of fact, the next chapter is almost complete and I plan to post it immediately once it is done. I am going out of town on Wednesday, so I plan on posting it by then, if not before.**

**Let me know what you think.**


	36. Fear and Tenderness

**I own nothing.**

**I am riding on a charter bus with a bunch of middle school music students for an end of the year trip out of state. Several hours on the bus has given me tons of time to write! **

**Thank you so much for reviewing and giving me your thoughts about this little tale. And thank you for being understanding when I don't get the chance to respond to very many of them. I am sure you would rather have the new chapter anyway. You guys are amazing and you make me smile every time my phone chimes with a new review/favorite/alert!**

**Okay, deep breath….**

BPOV

"Mr. Smith, I think it unwise for you to be here."

"Come now, Isabella, I think we are past such formalities. Surely you feel comfortable enough to call me James by now."

I had no idea what he might be capable of, so I kept still, waiting for him to make a move. I held my basket directly in front of me, hiding my belly from his view. I was unsure if he knew of the child I carried, but did not wish to bring his attention to it, in any case. I watched him cautiously as he walked slowly toward me, rubbing his chin with his right hand as though he were considering what he might say or do next. Determined to show him no fear, I sought to keep him talking, hoping I would not anger him. I only had to hope he would not notice the shaking of my hands as they gripped the handle of the basket, nor the trembling of my legs as they fought to hold me in place rather than run from the danger he posed.

"I believe you have some explaining to do, Isabella. I have waited quite some time to have the opportunity to speak with you privately. Although, I suppose I should be pleased that our moment came before winter. The woods can be a terribly cold place when the winter snows arrive. Of course, you know this already, so I will get to it. I must admit, I am rather disappointed that you have not chosen to honor our agreement."

"I did not agree to anything, Mr. Smith. If anything, you threatened me and conspired to destroy my husband's reputation before taking his life. There was nothing of honor in it."

"Well, there is some fire in you after all. Perhaps I have underestimated you, my dear."

He continued to circle, keeping his eyes on me the entire time. I turned my body as he moved, always keeping him in front of me, hiding behind my basket, watching his every move. Reaching a stone bench, he seated himself upon it, leaning forward and scrubbing his hands over his face.

"You leave me with a dilemma, Isabella. You see, I have no issue taking the life of any man who stands in the way of what I want. However, I have never ended the life of a woman, or an unborn child for that matter. I am uncertain as to how I must proceed."

He knew of my child. I could only hope that if there were any shred of decency within him, he would be swayed by that knowledge. Drawing in a breath, I pressed him a bit.

"Do you mean to say that you do not intend to end my life?"

"No, no, no. You misunderstand me. I fully intend to kill you. The struggle I face is not if, but when it should occur. You see, the child you carry presents me with some rather interesting possibilities. I have the option of killing you now, waiting for your noble husband to find your body, and easily taking his life as he is overcome with grief. Cleanly handled and finished. The estate is left in turmoil and mine for the taking. However, I am not certain that is the most profitable option any longer."

He stood and began pacing once again. Slowly, methodically as though he were trying to keep me on edge, just as a predator would stalk his prey.

"For you see, Isabella, now I have a more enjoyable option, and perhaps a more profitable one as well. You may have heard that I had a brush with fatherhood myself recently. Of course, it turned out for the best as I have no wish to be a father. The benefit to my keeping you alive for the foreseeable future is that I would have unending access to a warm body whenever I chose to use it for my pleasure without the concern of an unwanted pregnancy. Once you deliver your child, I would have a commodity that many would be willing to pay excessive amounts of money for – the healthy child of handsome, wealthy parentage. Poor child, being orphaned at birth, would need a good home. What do you think, Isabella? Would you be agreeable to an option that would allow your child to live? Of course, I would have no mercy as I used your body, so it is likely that it would come early if it did survive. Well, in any case, I would like to hear your thoughts on the matter."

I was sickened by his words. I feared I had no hope of this ending well. I had no way of knowing who was still inside the manor, or if they were even still alive. Had he taken their lives before confronting me, or were they blissfully going about their morning unaware of the terror I was facing? He stopped moving and brought his eyes back to mine.

"You seem a bit pale, Isabella. Perhaps you should sit."

I did not move or give him an answer. We stood, facing one another, unspeaking for some time. Finally, he shook his head, chuckling at some unknown joke as he began once again to spout his vile musings.

"Perhaps you have less fire in you than I thought. You have nothing to offer? No negotiation on behalf of your husband? Your child?"

"Would it bring any good? You have already stated that you intend that none of us survive unless it brings you a profit. What use would come of my pleading?"

His maniacal laughter unnerved me. He threw his head back and let out a bellowing laugh, holding his hand over his chest as though he were trying to control himself. In that moment, my eyes flicked up to the window of the conservatory where I saw Rosalie, staring wide-eyed and panic stricken at the sight before her. I quickly turned my eyes back to the madman before me while relief flooded me at the knowledge that no harm had come to my family inside the manor.

"You are wise, I give you that. What you assume is true, I have no use for you aside from what I might gain. I simply hoped to find amusement in your begging." His head dropped as he began to shake it. Turning he took a few steps away, sighing loudly before turning once again to face me, holding a firearm in his hand.

"Ahh, well, I must live with the disappointment then. Since you refuse to plead for your life, I do not wish to prolong this chore. Have you anything you wish to say. I might be willing to impart your words to your husband before I take his life. Of course, that would depend on whether or not he chooses to beg."

He looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to speak. I simply held his cold gaze, knowing that he would only make sport of me for any words I spoke. I suppose after a bit, he became bored and impatient. Lifting the pistol in his right hand, he held it level with my chest, offering me an evil, crazed grin. Closing my eyes, I tilted my face toward the sky and allowed the basket to drop from my grasp and placed my hands on my rounded belly. For just a moment, I could feel the soft rain beginning to fall, running down my cheeks, mixing with the tears I knew were falling. I had only enough time to register the cool breeze on my skin before I heard the explosion of the firearm.

I waited to feel something, anything. There was nothing. No pain, no burning, nothing. Slowly opening my eyes, I was startled by the sight before me. Not James Smith, but Rosalie. She stood, shaking, grasping a large pistol in her hands, as she held my gaze. As my eyes began to drift from hers, in search of James, she cried out.

"Do not look away, Isabella. Do not look at him, please." Tears were streaming from her eyes and she made no effort to wipe them away as we continued to stare at each other. It seemed hours, but was surely only seconds until I felt my legs begin to shake and my head began to spin. I could hear voices and realized that Emmett and Tyler had entered the garden as well. My knees buckled as I heard them shouting and felt a strong arm behind my shoulders and under my knees as I was lifted from the ground.

EPOV

My business with Jasper was completed quickly and for that I was thankful. I certainly did not enjoy being apart from my Bella, but it was especially difficult now with her current delicate condition. I had complete trust in my brother and father to care for her in my absence, I simply preferred to see to her needs and protection personally. Of course, the knowledge that Smith was still at large did nothing to set my mind at ease.

Jasper understood my concern and was efficient in his duty. My father had transferred the inheritance of Whitfield to me and the paperwork was simple to ensure the consistent operation of the estate should something happen to him. I also had requested a transfer of a portion of the property at Collingsworth be transferred to my Bella. She would not stand for the transfer of the entire estate to her ownership, but I knew she would be willing to accept the area of the estate that she had designated for the education of the tenant children. It would be hers regardless of whether the current attempt was successful or not.

In any case, we had the pertinent paperwork completed and filed in short order last evening and after a quick morning meal with Alice and baby Anna, I found myself pressing toward home, hoping to arrive before the evening meal. The morning sun had disappeared and I was now faced with impending rain. I could only hope that the storm would not burst forth before I had reached home.

When I had just passed halfway through my journey, I pulled up short at the sight of a rider speeding toward me at an alarming rate. As he neared me, I recognized Eric, my driver, and was immediately on alert that something was amiss.

"Mr. Cullen!"

"Eric, what is it?" I knew by his countenance that the news was bleak. His face was solemn and full of sorrow as he slowed to face me.

"Sir, Mr. Smith has shown himself at Collingsworth. There was a confrontation – "

"Isabella?" I felt as though my insides were caught in a frozen grip and my lungs could capture no air as he spoke.

"She is well, sir, but there was a confrontation. Mr. Smith has – "

I waited no longer for his explanation, but rather spurred my poor horse at a speed guaranteed to cause him illness once we stopped. I rode into the rains as they poured from the heavens, having no care for the state of my own body or the animal that carried me. My only thoughts were of my sweet wife confronted by that evil wretch in our own home.

Arriving at the manor some time later, but much sooner than I would have expected, I dismounted my horse, leaving him unattended as I bounded up the front steps and through the door.

"Tyler! Emmett!" Calling out for them as I ran for the stairs, I was brought up short by my father's voice.

"Edward. This way, son." Turning toward his voice, I noticed my father and Emmett standing across the room near the entrance to the dining room.

"Would either of you care to tell me what happened today? Where is my wife?"

My father quickly grasped my arm and pulled me to face him. "I will tell you the whole of it, but you must calm yourself, Edward. Isabella is delicate at the moment and you will upset her further. Now, come with us and let us explain."

Scrubbing my hands over my face, I ran them through my hair in an effort to gain control of my emotions before turning to face Emmett. "Tell me."

"It appears as though he was waiting to gain access to her at the opportune moment. She had been in the garden with Emma most of the morning and once the child left her side, he approached. Rosalie saw it from the windows of the conservatory and ran to retrieve your firearm from the study. We only heard the gunfire and I ran toward the garden. Tyler ran from the house as well, and we found them both standing over his body."

My father stepped forward and placed his hand on Emmett's shoulder while he struggled to maintain his composure. It only took a moment for him to recover himself before continuing.

"We brought the ladies into the house, then, and Mrs. Cope assisted Rosalie to clean herself up. Isabella, however, will allow no assistance."

"What do you mean? What assistance? Will she not be comforted?"

"Edward." My father's calm voice and gentle presence caused me to settle a bit as I struggled to keep myself from running to my Bella immediately. "She is distraught, and has retreated into herself. She is in the pump room beside the kitchen and your mother is with her. She has yet to change her clothing or wash herself."

"I cannot understand your meaning. Will you simply allow me to go to her and see for myself?"

Placing his hand on my arm just above the bend, he met my eyes as he described the state in which they found my wife. "Son, she has yet to tell anyone of the words he spoke to her, but they caused such terror in her that she lost the ability to control her bladder. I am certain the pregnancy did little to prevent this occurrence. You need to know, however, the worst of it is that she is covered with blood on her front side."

I am sure he saw sheer panic and fear on my face as he quickly grasped both of my arms in his hands, holding me in place as he continued, "It is not her own. Rosalie fired that weapon while he stood only a short distance from Isabella. It was inevitable that she would end up soiled as a result. I simply ask that you rein in whatever reaction overtakes you when you see her. I suspect she is holding on just enough to find her strength and comfort in you.'

Giving him a simple nod, I closed my eyes and worked to calm my breathing. It occurred to me that I owed a debt of gratitude to Rosalie, and yet I had no idea of her condition. Lifting my eyes to Emmett's, I inquired about his wife.

"Rosalie is unharmed?"

"She is well. She is understandably upset at the knowledge that she has ended a life, but she does not regret it. I have sent her to rest as her nerves are a bit jumpy."

"Yes, I can imagine they would be. Please relay to her my gratitude. I will speak with her when she is feeling better."

"She has come to love Isabella very much, Edward."

"And for that, I will be forever grateful." Nodding once in agreement, Emmett turned and gestured for me to go ahead of him through the door. We walked in silence to the small room beside the kitchen that housed the water pump and drain. Taking a deep breath, I slowly pushed the door open to reveal my mother just inside and to the right. She was holding a cup of water and her red, swollen eyes snapped immediately to mine as I entered the room. Steeling myself for what I might see, I cautiously brought my gaze to my wife on the opposite side of the room.

My father was correct in assuming her appearance would be alarming. Her hair and dress were wet, I assumed from the rain. The front of her dress, her face, and neck were all splattered with blood, though where it stained her skin was somewhat smeared. I was certain this was due to my mother's attempts to wipe it from her. Bella stared at the floor in front of her, only shifting her gaze when I stepped across the room and knelt before her.

"Bella." Her name was but a whisper as it fell from my lips, as though I feared she would startle if it were any louder. When her eyes met mine, she offered a sad smile and whispered, "You have returned to me."

"I promised that I would." She simply nodded, never moving her gaze. I held out my hand, offering it to her gently, "Will you come with me, Bella? We should get you into some dry clothing."

She stared at my hand for a moment before meeting my eyes once again. "The constable has come. I feared they might arrest me. Or Rosalie. Has he spoken to you?"

I glanced back over my shoulder to where Emmett stood in the doorway. Emmett shook his head, "We sent for him immediately. He has removed – it has been taken care of. He will contact you later to speak with Isabella when she is feeling up to it."

Nodding, I turned back to my Bella. "All is well, love. Come, let me assist you." Taking my hand, she stood slowly from the stool where she had been sitting, but took only a couple of steps before stopping and pulling her hands from mine. Shaking her head, she wiped her hands down the front of her soiled dress.

"I do not wish any part of him to enter our home. Please."

I understood her intention immediately and turned and sought help from my mother. "Will you ask Mrs. Cope to bring a tub of heated water and some soap and linens? Perhaps you could bring her a clean dressing gown and some dry clothing for me as well? I will assist her here."

Reaching out to grasp my arm, she gave it a gentle squeeze before leaving the room, pushing Emmett and my father out in front of her. When the door closed, I turned back to Bella, gauging her health. She was pale, but did not seem ill. I urged her to sit once again. When she was settled, I removed her shoes and set them aside. Moving behind her, I opened the buttons on her dress and slid it forward from her shoulders, noticing her slight trembling as I did so. Standing before her once again, I slid the dress from her arms, allowing it to drop to the floor at her feet. I continued to undress her until all that remained was her chemise, damp and stained a lighter shade of red by the blood that had saturated her clothing.

She said nothing, nor did she move as the door opened and my mother entered, followed by Mrs. Cope and Rachel, our new maid. They carried tubs of water, linens and soap. Mother draped the robe across a stool and offered Bella some tea, which she quickly declined with a slight shake of her head. All three ladies quickly exited after a quiet reminder from my mother that my Bella had not had anything to eat since the morning meal. I assured her I would take care of it and then ushered them out of the room.

Returning to my wife, I retrieved a cloth and dipped it into the warm water before gently wiping it across her cheek. Closing her eyes, she leaned ever so slightly into my hand with each pass of the cloth over her skin. I continued on this way for some time – wringing out the cloth, applying the soap, washing her face, neck, arms, and hands before gently removing the stained chemise from her body and bathing her tenderly. As the cloth made its first pass over her swollen belly, she sniffled slightly. Looking up at her from where I knelt, I watched as her hand covered mine as I wiped the cloth over her skin. When she finally spoke it was barely a whisper.

"I feared he came to me after ending your life."

"Is this what he led you to believe?"

"No. I only feared it. He told me he would kill you as you grieved over the body of your dead wife and child. He intended I would die as I would not beg for my life. In truth, I feared he would not kill me.

I struggled to understand her words. Why would she resign herself to die? What had been his threat that she would rather die than endure it? I felt my stomach churn with dread as I considered how she might answer, but knew I must ask anyway.

"What do you mean, Isabella?"

She said nothing for a time as I continued bathing her. As I reached for the linen to dry her, she began to tremble and her tears were more insistent. Pulling her arms into her robe and wrapping it around her shoulders, I turned her to face me and lifted her eyes to mine with my fingers under her chin.

"Tell me, love. He can harm you no longer."

Turning her head to avert her eyes, she spoke the words that both enraged me and broke my heart for her fear and pain.

"Were I to beg him, he intended to keep me alive, using my body for his pleasure until I delivered our child. Having no further use for me, he would orphan our child then sell him as though he were a commodity in the market."

By the time she managed to speak the last, she was sobbing, grasping at my shirt, attempting to bring me closer. Crushing her to me, I held her as tightly as I was able. "Shhh, my Bella. He cannot harm you. We are safe and our child is well."

It took some time before her cries and trembling had subsided. When she was finally a bit calmer, I loosened my hold on her, leaning back so that I could see her face. "You need to rest, love. I do not wish you to be ill."

She nodded and glanced down at the pile of clothing on the floor. Before she could gather it, I shook my head and pulled her forward, "Do not trouble yourself. I will have Rachel see to it."

"No. I want them burned." Her eyes were full of fire and determination. There was to be no argument.

"I understand." And truly, I did understand. I had no wish to see any trace of this day ever again. I led her upstairs and into our room before ringing for Tyler and my father. Upon their arrival, I gave Tyler instruction for the removal of Isabella's clothing as well as arrangements for a light meal to be delivered to the room. My father informed me that both he and my mother and Emmett and Rosalie had requested the same. Tyler assured me that the gardens had been cleared and that any remnants that the rain had not washed away would be dealt with tomorrow. After a little more discussion regarding simple estate matters, he left my father and I to tend to my Bella.

She was exhausted and after a simple examination by my father, I placed her in the bed to rest for a bit. Joining my father at the hearth, we began to build a fire as the sun had set and the room was becoming chilled. After a few minutes of silence, he turned and studied me before finally speaking.

"You have controlled your anger exceptionally well today, son. I cannot fathom what you must be thinking."

Giving a bitter laugh, I threw the small bit of wood into the hearth before settling on my knees on the floor. "I will be indebted to Rosalie for all eternity for rescuing the life of my wife and child, but I would be lying were I to say I did not wish him still breathing so that I could shred him with my bare hands. I fear that should I see his corpse, I might be driven to accomplish it regardless."

"I understand your rage. I can only imagine to horrors she spoke of." Placing his hand on my shoulder, he squeezed gently before continuing, "You are a good man, Edward, and you are becoming a fine husband. You have placed your wife's needs above your own today and have shown yourself to be a man of character and compassion. Isabella will need that strength to draw on. Do not allow your rage to rob her of the gentle man that you are."

He stood then and watched the fire build for a few minutes before quietly leaving the room, leaving me to the silence. After a while, Bella's soft voice broke me from my angry thoughts.

"Are you angry?"

I was a bit startled by her question and for a moment I did not have an answer. I was angry. Very angry. But it had nothing to do with her. I decided that honesty was the simplest and best route. "I am angry, though my anger is not toward you. Why do you ask?"

"I worried that you were angry with me, but I reasoned you could not have cared for me as you did this afternoon if you were truly furious with me. I am not sure why I am asking, I simply need to know that we are alright." Her honesty was humbling. As I neared the bed where she sat, I could feel the tension radiating from her and I was certain she could feel the same from me. I crawled up beside her and pulled her into my arms, kissing her forehead as I did so.

"I am angry that you were ever placed in these circumstances, sweetheart. I am angry that you had cause to fear for your life. I am angry that you were forced to watch a man put to death mere paces from where you stood." Taking her face in my hands, I brought her to face me. "I am angry about a great many injustices that occurred today, but more than all else, I am angry that once again I have failed to protect you."

"Emmett, Carlisle and Tyler were all here and they could not protect me, either. He had been hiding in those woods, waiting for his moment. It might have been years, but he would have waited. You have nothing to be upset about. If anything, I am relieved it is over and grateful to Rosalie for her quick response. I cannot comprehend the risk she took for me, for us."

"I told you before, Rosalie is extremely loyal to those she loves. You have won her over just as you have everyone else that meets you, love. At any rate, you did no less for her last winter."

She sat for a moment, considering my words. When she finally spoke, her wisdom and determination were evident.

"I no longer wish to dwell on this. I no longer wish to give that man any more of my strength in worry and fear. I will speak to the constable tomorrow morning and put this in our past. We will open the cottage to the children next week, continue planning for the Winter Ball and enjoy our lives with no fear and worry clouding over us."

Grasping my hands and bringing them to her lips, she placed a soft kiss on each of my open palms before holding them to her chest. "Will you let this go as well? He can do us no more harm other than the anger and bitterness that will destroy you if you hold onto it. He did not lay so much as a finger to my flesh today, and I am unharmed and no longer afraid. Please, Edward."

I could not deny her. Pressing my lips to hers in a tender kiss, I made my vow. "I will let this go. For you, my love. Will you promise me something as well?" I waited for her nod of agreement. "Eat something and then rest. I will not have you ill and I am concerned for our child as well."

She smiled a genuine, sweet smile and agreed quickly.

After a small meal, I settled her back in the bed, climbing in beside her and holding her to me as I opened her favorite book of Shakespeare's sonnets, reading until she drifted to sleep. I had planned to attend to some things in my study once she was resting peacefully, but found I could not bring myself to leave her even for an hour.

Several hours later I was thankful I had not left her as her sleep had been fitful at best. She had consciously chosen to move forward, but her mind at rest had other plans. She cried out several times in her sleep and twice had to be restrained as she swung her little fists at me as her body tensed and jerked. I could only imagine what her dreams held to upset her so severely. Each time it occurred, I held her tightly as I whispered assurance of her safety or hummed softly until she settled.

I had no illusions regarding exactly how frightened she was and I knew it would take some time for her to recover, whether she would admit it or not. I could only hope that the courage and strength that had upheld her so well in the past would assist her in this as well.


	37. Justice and Celebrations

**I own nothing.**

**I am so sorry for being so late with this update. I teach and we are in a testing window. I have been completely covered up in the last couple of weeks and have found it extremely difficult to write. I know that there have been so many of you who have just recently found this story and have reviewed. I also know that there are many of you who have been with me for a loooonnnng time and continue to review. To all of you, let me say thank you so much! I am posting this chapter rather than responding to reviews, but I didn't think you would mind.**

**Thank you!**

EPOV

The next morning was a flurry of activity. I rose early and as loathe as I was to do so, I left my Bella sleeping as I sought out Eric to send him into town to find the constable. He arrived some time later and interviewed first Tyler, then Rosalie with Emmett by her side. I stayed upstairs with Bella through most of those conversations. She woke feeling a bit ill and was violently sick when she rose from the bed. I was concerned as it had been some weeks since she had experienced this difficult symptom of pregnancy. I was certain it was her nerves, fear and worry that had caused it.

Tyler brought in a tray that Mrs. Cope had prepared, containing ginger tea and some toast. Bella sipped a bit of the tea before again attempting to dress herself. I offered her the only reprieve I could.

"Sweetheart, there is no reason for you to trouble yourself. I will simply inform the constable that you are unwell."

"No, Edward. I wish to put this to rest. I will speak to him today and be done with it."

She was determined and I knew better than to continue this line of reasoning as it would only upset her further. Instead, once she was presentable, I took her hand and led her to the library where my father was conferring with the constable and Justice Clearwater who had just arrived. My Bella immediately fell into her role as mistress of Collingsworth.

"Good morning, gentlemen. Can I offer you some refreshment?" Both men declined her offer and she sat facing them before speaking once again. "I am certain you have some questions for me and I am more than ready to finish this, so please, proceed you're your inquiry."

As always, I was stunned by her strength. She stoically answered their questions and recounted the frightening event. While I had prepared myself to stop the interview at the first sign of her distress, she did not falter once. It was only when Justice Clearwater spoke that she showed any frailty. Her hands covered the roundness that held our child and her chin quivered with her struggle to contain her tears.

"Mrs. Cullen, I wish to extend my sincerest apologies at our inability to protect you from his madness. The thought that Smith could cause such terror to a woman in such delicate condition is beyond appalling. Please forgive my lack of protection in this incident."

"Justice Clearwater, I do not hold anyone responsible for Mr. Smith's actions other than Mr. Smith himself. I never feared his ability to take my home. He was clearly delusional in his reasoning. Even if he had succeeded in removing my husband and myself, he would never gain access to the estate as it would pass to Edward's family. I believe his actions were caused by his mental instability. It was that instability that worried me. He was so singularly obsessed with gaining this property that it overruled his judgment and made him dangerous. As much as I hate that Rosalie was forced to take his life, I will be grateful for her courage for as long as I live. Please tell me you have no intention to arrest her."

The constable was quick to answer, "Of course not, ma'am. We only needed to document the event as it ended in a death. We will bring no charge against Mrs. Cullen."

The interview lasted only a few more minutes and it was obvious that Bella was exhausted. My father noticed her pale countenance as well and was quick to address it.

"Edward, I would be happy to see our guests out as I am certain you would rather stay with Isabella." Turning toward the men, my father made the easy transition to lead them from the library. "Gentlemen, this way please. Justice, my son tells me you enjoy the hunt. Perhaps we could find a time…."

My father's voice drifted away as he led the men from the room, leaving me alone with my wife who sat silently staring out the windows. Her right hand was rubbing absently across her belly as she seemed lost in her thoughts.

"Bella?" She did not respond, so I walked to her, kneeling at her feet and pressing both of my hands to her belly. Her eyes immediately found mine. "How is our little one this morning?"

The hazy look in her eyes seemed to clear as she smiled and covered my hands with hers, moving them to a different spot on the left side of her belly. "Very busy. He is awake and wishes to play."

We sat for some time, simply enjoying the movement of our child, resting comfortably and safe in Bella's womb. The gentle flutters and bumps bringing a calm to Bella's face and causing her to finally relax. I rose from the floor and seated myself beside her, drawing her into my side and holding her close. It was only moments later that I felt her breathing deepen and her head dropped onto my chest. It was an easy decision to lift her tired body and carry her to bed to rest.

BPOV

I woke to the afternoon sun shining brightly into the room. I could tell from the angle of the light coming into the room that it must be close to the evening meal. Turning my head, I fully expected to see Edward resting beside me, but was instead met by a peacefully sleeping Rosalie.

"She wanted to see you. Emmett said she was beyond exhausted but refused to rest until she saw you. This seemed to be the easiest solution."

I lifted my head in the direction of Edward's voice and found him seated in his chair near the fire. He held a book in his lap and a cup of tea in his hand. Smiling gently, he rose and poured another cup, bringing it to me as I sat up and rested against the pillows. Glancing back at Rosalie, I worried for her state of mind.

"Edward, is she well?"

"She is. She was simply worried about you and wished to see for herself that you were alright. The last she saw you was yesterday in the pump room."

"I must have looked a fright." He did not answer, but his furrowed brow and clenched jaw were enough to indicate that I had indeed been in a poor state yesterday afternoon. Placing the tea on the bedside table, Edward glanced at Rosalie before squeezing my hand and taking a step back.

"I have need to finish my book before dinner." He released my hand and smiled softly as he turned and strode back to his chair. I was puzzled for a moment until I felt movement beside me. Turning my head to face her, I was met with Rosalie's tear filled eyes.

"I am glad you are better today, Isabella."

"I am glad you were here yesterday."

"We are family. Even more, we are sisters, Isabella. We need speak of it no more."

* * * A H R * * *

Emmett, Rose and Emma stayed a few days longer than they had planned, giving Rosalie and I time to strengthen our relationship. There was a bond between us now that not even Edward could understand. He was never far away, but he did allow me all the time I wished to spend with Rosalie as he knew I would be upset when she left. When the day arrived, it was made less difficult with the knowledge that they would return soon for the Winter Ball. A few days later when Carlisle and Esme left, it marked the first time since our marriage that Edward and I were alone in the manor.

The weeks passed quickly then, as the cottage school opened and we were nearly overwhelmed with the number of children who attended. Mr. Cheney was an excellent tutor and it was obvious that the children were enjoying their new endeavor. He and Angela had, in fact, been betrothed and were planning to wed at the new year. I was thrilled to have her moving closer to me and looked forward to spending more time with her once my confinement was finished.

The days grew cold and short and I was reminded of the past winter when I worried about whether we would have enough candles and grain to see us into the spring. I would never have considered that my life would change so drastically in only the span of a year. Now I was preparing for my second Winter's Ball as mistress of Collingsworth while carrying my first child. It would be a highly irregular event for an expectant woman to be present, much less act as hostess for a Ball, but then, very little about our lives over the past year had been normal. For the most part, the townspeople were curious about the events surrounding Mr. Smith's death as well as the arrival of the heir of Collingsworth. I had less than a month to prepare and had yet to determine what I would wear to the event. Most of my dresses had been let out to accommodate my expanding belly, but I had nothing that would pass for a ball gown. As it happened, I had no need to worry.

Edward had just left for town when Tyler informed me that Angela Webber and Lauren Mallory had come to visit. Entering the sitting room, I found both ladies giggling and highly excited.

"Lauren, Angela, what a grand surprise!" Both ladies were quick to rise and we embraced as though we had not seen one another in years. I turned and asked Tyler to have some tea and cakes sent in. He strode quickly from the room, leaving me to visit with my friends.

"Isabella! Look at you! You fairly glow with joy." Lauren seemed truly sincere in her appraisal and I was quick to remember that it had not been Lauren, but her mother that had shunned me when we left Collingsworth. Lauren was still as kindhearted and loyal as ever. I could not help but wonder if her mother was aware that she was here or if she perhaps sent Lauren here to renew our friendship in hopes of gaining the approval of my husband, Either way, it held no importance to me. I was only thrilled to have my friend in my home.

"Thank you, Lauren. I feel very well today."

Angela spoke up for the first time. "I am glad to hear it, as we have much to accomplish today."

"What is your meaning? Are you not here for a visit?"

Both ladies simply smiled at me and grasped my hands, pulling me forward toward the door. Stepping just outside of the sitting room, I was startled by the sight of Tyler, who held no tea but instead had my cloak at the ready. Addressing Angela, he placed it around my shoulders, "The carriage stands ready Miss Webber."

"Thank you, Mr. Tyler. We will ensure that Mrs. Cullen is home before the evening meal."

My plea for information went unanswered as both Angela and Lauren were being secretive and clearly had a plan. We rode to town giggling and gossiping like old women and it felt as though my friends had never been missing from my life. I was grateful for the companionship and the joy that I knew the afternoon would bring.

Arriving in town, we were assisted from the carriage by Eric and Angela clasped my hand in hers, leading me directly to the dress shop. Mrs. Crowley looked up from her needlework and a wide smile graced her excited face.

"I have been expecting you! I can hardly wait to show you the gown. Come, I have everything ready." Reaching out, she grasped my hand and pulled me toward the back of the shop. I was certain my confusion was evident on my face as I struggled to understand what was happening.

"Mrs. Crowley, I have ordered no gown. I am uncertain what preparations you…."

"Tell me, Mrs. Cullen, what is it you were intending to wear to the Ball if not a gown?"

I had been uncertain as to what I would wear. I had been busy with preparations and overseeing the cottage school and had neglected to consider my need for a gown. It was apparent that someone had considered it for me. Turning toward my friends, I intended to discern their part in this when I was brought up short by the sight of Lauren and Angela holding the most stunning gown I had ever seen.

It was made of a golden champagne chiffon with delicate blue embroidery covering the bodice. The sleeves were a sheer cap with the same blue needlework. The skirt was full and flowing and would drape beautifully over my growing belly. The hemline was also adorned with the ornate embroidery and I knew it had been a tedious labor for Mrs. Crowley to complete it. As if the gown were not enough, it had been presented with satin slippers to match. I was overwhelmed as Mrs. Crowley stepped toward me to offer an explanation.

"I do hope you are pleased. I suggested perhaps a ruby color, but Mr. Cullen was insistent that you would prefer a gown that would showcase a particular piece of jewelry."

"Edward did this?" At first, I was stunned by this revelation, but as I considered his thoughtfulness, it made perfect sense.

"He did. Are you unhappy with his choices?"

"No, not at all. It is the most beautiful gown I have ever seen. It must have consumed many hours of your time, Mrs. Crowley."

"It did, but it was surely worth it to know that you are pleased. Come now, you should try it on so that we may set any alterations."

I allowed her to lead me to a dressing area as Lauren and Angela followed behind with the gown. It truly was stunning and needed only a few adjustments in fitting. Mrs. Crowley made the markings and guaranteed delivery of the gown to Collingsworth the following afternoon.

We spent the remainder of the afternoon in the markets, picking up items that we fancied as well as some time at a local restaurant for afternoon tea. As the day grew late, Lauren excused herself to return home for the evening meal and Angela journeyed with me to return to the estate. Upon our arrival, she was quick to state her need to return home and refused my invitation to stay for the meal. She abruptly turned and reentered the carriage, leaving me with a promise to return in a few days. I stood baffled at her quick retreat, hoping I had done nothing to offend. Shaking my head, I opened the door and entered the manor, confused that there was no one to greet me as there usually was.

"Tyler?" My voice echoed in the entry hall and it was clear that there was no one to hear me. I removed my cloak and draped it over a chair as I continued into the house. Entering the dining room, I was startled to find it empty and void of any meal preparations. I contemplated where I might find someone home when I heard a door close somewhere behind me. As I exited the dining room, I was surprised by the presence of rose petals scattered in a pattern along the floor of the great hall. They were specific enough to follow and I carefully stepped over them so as not to slip as I followed the path they directed.

After a brief walk, I found myself silently twisting the knob attached to the door leading into the conservatory. Pressing it slowly open, I entered to find Edward standing in the center of the room, wearing formal dinner attire and holding a single rose in his hand. The room was softly lit by candles scattered throughout and a table set for a meal was prepared near the window.

"Edward?" I was overwhelmed at such a romantic gesture and was unsure what his immediate intentions were. He smiled and stretched out his hand toward me.

"Come, my Bella."

I closed the distance between us and was immediately wrapped in his arms. I gazed up into his warm, gentle eyes and could not help but smile back at him.

"Do you have any idea what this day is, my sweet wife?" At my blank stare, he pressed his lips gently to mine then met my eyes as he spoke, "It was but a year ago this day that we were wed. You slipped from that ladder and I caught you in my arms. It was a fortunate event, as I have thoroughly enjoyed the feel of you in my arms ever since. I love you, my Bella."

"As I love you."

We shared a meal together. The very same meal we had shared the night he brought me to Collingsworth as his wife. I had fought tears that evening as I had been without a good meal for so long, but this night there were no tears as we dined together.

"Have you any regrets at all?" He seemed thoughtful for a moment before he met my eyes once again and answered sincerely.

"Only one. I regret very much my anger the night we were wed. It was all so sudden and shocking that I could not grasp any feelings but my own. I know that my anger caused you to be fearful and I will always regret that you were afraid and upset when you returned to Collingsworth. Have you any regrets?"

"I regret only that I was not more forthcoming regarding my feelings for you. I was afraid to lose my heart to you and not be loved in return. You were clear in your intent, but I struggled to believe it."

"I had to earn your trust. You could not feel safe to declare your feelings until you could trust me. I will be forever grateful for the gift of your heart, my Bella."

When our meal was complete, we strolled for a bit in the garden which Edward had lit with lanterns. Most of the flowers were dormant for the winter, but the evergreen plants and trees were beautiful in the soft firelight. When we retired to our room for the night, a bath had been prepared with lavender oil and vanilla. Though it was becoming a snug fit with my belly, we nestled into the tub together before reclining on blankets and pillows before the fire. Edward recited romantic, and sometimes erotic, passages from my favorite poets as he alternated feeding me my favorite French chocolates and tasting those same chocolates from my lips and tongue as he kissed me deeply. It was the early hours of the morning when he finally carried my exhausted, but well loved body to the bed and wrapped himself around me snugly. The weight of his arms and the warmth of the room was quickly bringing sleep, but I had yet to thank him.

"Edward?"

"Yes, love?"

"My gown is beautiful. Thank you."

"You are more than welcome. I am happy you are pleased with it." His lips pressed softly against my temple.

"Edward?"

"Hmmm…."

"Our life is perfect. Thank you."

"You are more than loved, my Bella. I am happy you are pleased with me."

"I love you, husband."

"As I love you. Sleep now, love."

* * * A H R * * *

EPOV

A light snow began to fall on the afternoon of the Winter Ball. My family had arrived only a few days before and the house and staff had been well prepared for the event. My Bella had created a stunningly beautiful atmosphere for our guests and had left me speechless and breathless when she had descended the stairs only a short time ago.

On the evening of the last Winter Ball, I had sworn there would never be a lovlier sight than that of my wife adorned in her blue gown, blushing as she shyly walked toward me. However, her beauty on that night paled in comparison to the vision she was this evening. Draped in that golden color with a delicate hint of blue and bejeweled with her mother's pendant, she was indeed lovely. But the sight of her adorned this way while round with my child had stolen my thoughts as well as my breath and I found myself mumbling incoherently as she met my eyes and walked confidently into my embrace. It took every bit of willpower I possessed to escort her into the ballroom rather than carry her quickly back to our rooms and have her repeatedly.

I was, after all, a gentleman. I could certainly hold off my urges for a couple of hours. At most.

Isabella truly had become the mistress of the manor. She was a warm and gracious hostess and was concerned for the needs of every guest. I was so proud of her and proud that she was mine. Our guests were eager to visit with her and to offer their congratulations on the impending birth of our child. Several of the ladies even brought her gifts for the child as well as some words of advice that seemed to encourage my sweet wife. Of course, there were some who offered her information that made her pale with discomfort as she worried privately about the actual birth. I knew she was a bit fearful concerning that event, but she remained ever the stoic hostess even though I could see her doubt in her eyes.

When the last carriage departed, we escaped quickly to our rooms where I once again placed my Bella in my favorite chair and removed her slippers before massaging her feet and legs. However, this time she did not wait for me to remove her gown, but rather, she found her way out of it quickly and waited for me in our bed. We had begun to explore several different options to keep her comfortable as her belly continued to grow. On this night, as had become our favorite, I held her from behind as we lay on our sides with her leg draped back over my hip. It was a gentle push and pull, punctuated by heavy breaths and quiet moans as I moved within her and my hands played over her body. Her body was easily stimulated as of late, making it a quick climb to her pleasure. It was only moments before she was trembling and crying out my name, causing me to follow her immediately into that bliss.

"Mmmm… I much prefer this dance to those we shared earlier this evening, Mrs. Cullen."

"Edward!" Her shocked exclamation was quickly overtaken by her giggles. "How bold you are, husband! I will never be able to share a dance with you again that I do not think of this moment."

"Which is exactly what I intended, love."

"You are a sly creature, Mr. Cullen, but I will gladly dance with you at any time you feel the desire."

"At any time?"

"Any but now. I am exhausted husband, and blissfully satisfied at this moment. I wish to sleep."

"Then sleep, my love. There is always tomorrow." I gathered her into my arms and brought her back snugly against my chest. Placing my hands over her belly, I gently caressed her skin where she carried our child as I felt her relax and her breathing slow and even out.

Our lives had changed dramatically in the course of a year. My wife had learned to trust me and had become the confident, joyful, and competent woman I knew she was from the beginning. I was learning to be the husband she needed, to be understanding and patient with her and to be attentive to her needs and encourage her hopes and dreams. We had overcome great threat and rumor and would soon be blessed with a child. I slipped into sleep that night knowing that I had more than I ever thought possible within my arms.


	38. Inheritance and an heir

**I own nothing.**

**You humble me with your support for this story. Once more chapter after this one…makes me sad to think about it.**

BPOV

"I am expecting a gentleman this afternoon for the purchase of a couple of horses, but I have no other appointments."

"You will be working in your study today?" I shifted uncomfortably on my chair as I picked at my morning meal. I had grown so large in the last few weeks that I found comfort fleeting and sleep all but impossible.

Edward nodded as he sipped his tea, "Yes, I prefer to remain close to the manor, for obvious reasons." He smiled gently at me before leaning forward to grasp my hand. "You did not rest well last night. Perhaps you can find a quiet hour for a nap today?"

"It will not matter. Your child seems determined that I should be awake and ready for his arrival at any moment."

"Promise me then, that you will find something restful to occupy your time. Some needlework perhaps? You could work on the swaddling quilt."

"It is complete and has turned out beautifully. I need only a child to wrap in it."

"Soon, love. Very soon." He lifted my hand to his lips, kissing my fingers gently before rising from his seat and kneeling next to my chair. Placing his hand on me, he caressed my swollen belly as he pressed his lips softly to mine. "Even uncomfortable and exhausted, you are beautiful, my Bella. You cannot know what a vision you are, carrying the evidence of our love and passion in your body for all to see."

"Hmmm… spoken by either a proud man or a lovesick fool."

He chuckled lightly at my observation, "I am certainly both, sweet wife. And surprisingly happy about it." His face grew serious once again, "Give me your promise, Bella. Nothing strenuous."

"Will you allow me a turn in the garden if the weather is pleasant?" At his affirmative response, I smiled and gave my vow, "Then you have my word that I attempt nothing more strenuous than a walk through the garden in full view of the manor."

We had repeated this conversation each morning for the last couple of weeks. The more poorly I slept, the more worried he became. Seemingly satisfied with my response, he returned to his chair and resumed his meal. It was only a moment before he broke the silence once again.

"What would you think of a visit to Whitfield?"

"Whitfield? I understood that your parents were to arrive here on the day after tomorrow. Have their plans changed?"

"Not at all. I am suggesting a trip in the late spring, once you have recovered and would be comfortable traveling with an infant. Would you consider it?"

"I – of course, I would." My mind began spinning with the possibilities of this suggestion. Rosalie had mentioned Whitfield and something of Edward's inheritance, but had not answered my questions. She would only suggest that I speak with Edward regarding that information. I had not done so as I was uncertain what it might mean.

"Bella?"

I busied myself with the tea in front of me, adding honey and a bit of lemon, hoping he would not press.

"Isabella, look at me." Apparently, he would press for an answer. He regarded me carefully as I met his gaze, "What troubles you?"

"Nothing, I am simply tired."

Heaving a sigh, he sat back against his chair, dropping his hands to his lap. "I thought we were past this."

"Edward, I –"

"No, Bella. Make no excuses. Stop hiding from me behind your doubt and worry and tell me what is troubling you. You limit my capabilities as your husband as I can do nothing to repair it if you do not tell me."

He was right. I had not considered this truth. I only considered that he might be angry were I to question him regarding money and property. Taking a deep breath, I met his eyes once again.

"Forgive me, Edward. I did not consider that it might upset you in this way. I only worried that my question might anger you."

"I am certainly intrigued, my Bella. What on earth could you ask that might have me angered at the woman who is heavily pregnant with my child?"

"Do you intend for us to take up residence at Whitfield?"

He regarded me carefully for a moment, bringing his hand up and drawing his finger across his lower lip slowly as he watched me. Finally, he cocked his head to the side as he spoke softly, "No, I had no such intention. Why do you ask?"

Dropping my eyes back to my teacup, I answered quickly, "Rosalie indicated that you had information regarding your inheritance and Whitfield. I thought perhaps you were planning to move from Collingsworth. I would – I was wondering."

"What were you going to say? You would… what?"

Keeping my eyes on my cup, I found I could only whisper, "I would like to stay. Certainly, I will go where you go, but if you were to offer, I would like to stay at Collingsworth."

"Sweetheart, look at me, please." When our eyes met, he continued, "Thank you for telling me what you desire. I have no intention of removing you from Collingsworth. I would never make a decision of that magnitude without discussing it with you. This is our home and I wish to raise our children here."

Leaning over, he grasped my hand. "I have spoken to my father regarding the matter of inheritance. He has chosen to grant future ownership of Whitfield to me, as Emmett will inherit the property owned by Rosalie's family. I was unaware that Rosalie knew this or I would have clarified this to you long ago. Truthfully, it means little now and will only mean that I will have more to manage in my later years. Perhaps by then our little one will have married and settled and will be willing to take one of them off of our hands."

He winked and smiled then, and I could not help but giggle a bit at his boyish expression.

"Alright, off with you to the gardens then, I have work to be done." He stood from his chair and kissed my cheek before leaving the room. I shook my head and smiled to myself at his easy manner. Why I worried over his responses, I will never understand. He was ever patient, always willing to hear me out before making a decision when it affected both of us.

Leaving the table, I went to the library in search of a book to bring to the garden. As I walked, I pressed a hand to my lower back trying to relieve a dull ache from having sat too long in one place. I knew I was amusing to watch as I made my way down the hall. This was confirmed when I heard Edward chuckle as I passed the open door of his study.

Retrieving my book, I soon found myself reclining on a bench in the garden. The morning was unseasonably warm and was pleasant after so many cold months. I found that I only needed a light shawl as I enjoyed the morning sun.

"Mrs. Cullen?" Glancing up, Mrs. Cope stood only a short distance away and was holding a tray. "I thought you might prefer your mid-day meal out here in the sunlight. You seem to be enjoying it today."

"Yes, thank you. It was kind of you to bring it out to me." I placed my book on the bench beside me and shifted my body once again, wincing slightly and pressing my hand once again against my lower back. Mrs. Cope noticed immediately as she placed the tray beside me.

"Have you some discomfort, Mrs. Cullen?"

"I am well. Perhaps I have been sitting too long in one place."

"Very well. Please ring should you need anything. I am going into town for some necessities, but I will return shortly. Tyler will attend you should you need anything."

"Thank you, Mrs. Cope. You are very kind."

She excused herself and left me to my book and my meal. After finishing my tea, I shifted my position once again as my back continued to ache. Perhaps if I were to lie down for a while it might alleviate some of my discomfort and I might even be able to sleep for a bit. Closing my book, I leaned forward, shifting my weight to stand and nearly fell to my knees as the ache that had been present all day seemed to spread immediately down my legs in sudden, sharp pain.

Dropping back onto the bench, I sat motionless for a moment as I caught my breath. Once the discomfort had eased, I considered what might be wrong. Had I been sitting that long? Carefully, I stood to my feet and took a cautious step forward. There was no sharp pain, just the ever present unease in my lower back. I decided to leave the tray behind and ask Tyler to retrieve it later. Lifting my book, I slowly began to walk toward the manor when another sharp and shooting pain overtook me. This one began in my back and spread toward the front of my body as well as my legs. I realized immediately what it was and drew a deep breath as I waited for it to pass.

As I was able, I continued toward the manor and through the door into the kitchen where I was brought up short by another stab of pain. Grasping the work table, I held fast until it eased.

"Tyler! Tyler, please!" I called out for him as I worked my way toward the stairs, seeming to stop every few minutes to deal with birthing pains as they came. When I entered the great hall, Tyler came running down the staircase.

"Mrs. Cullen? Are you well?"

"Edward. I-I need –" I was unable to finish as I held my breath through more discomfort. They seemed to be consistently coming only a few minutes apart. At this rate, I feared I might birth this child on the staircase.

"Let me assist you upstairs, ma'am." He reached out and grasped my hand as if to lead me up the stairs.

"No! Edward! Please, Tyler." I hoped he would heed my wishes. I could not seem to think past my need for Edward in this moment.

"He is in the stable. I will go, please just rest here for a moment." Tyler released my hand and ran out in the direction of the stables. I began the slow ascent up the stairs as I waited for my husband. It took only the span of two pains for him to come tearing through the manor. I was attempting to catch my breath, my eyes tightly shut, grasping the railing as pain seemed to roll through my midsection.

"Bella!"

His strong arms came around me and lifted me as I opened my eyes and met his worried gaze. "Why did you not send for me, love?"

"It has only just begun, Edward. But it does seem to be happening quickly."

He crossed the distance from the stairs to our room in a rush. Assisting me to undress, he was growing increasingly worried from the consistent discomfort that had overtaken my body.

"What can I do, love? Tell me what you need." His worried and fearful expression was heartbreaking and endearing at once.

"I wish to lie down. Will you send for the midwife?"

"I sent Tyler. She will be here soon." Lifting me in his arms once again, he placed me gently in our bed before drawing a chair over and sitting as he grasped my hand. I was more than a little embarrassed at my appearance as I struggled with the pain that consumed my body, but could not bring myself to care enough to send Edward away to spare him. Truthfully, I do not believe he would leave me be even if I begged. He sat dutifully, holding my hands and pressing a cool cloth to my brow.

Some time later, Irina, the midwife arrived and began issuing orders and instructions as she prepared her supplies. Turning to Edward, she waved her hand in the direction of the door, "I will care for her now, Mr. Cullen. I will send for you when the child arrives."

I felt panic at her words. "No! Please, Edward, do not go."

Irina shook her head and spoke sternly, "It is not done, Mrs. Cullen. Women see to the birthing of children. It will not do for him to see you in such an indelicate state."

Regardless of her reasons, I knew I would not accomplish the safe arrival of our child if Edward were to leave in that moment. I grasped his hand tightly in mine, enduring another pain and struggling against the fear I felt.

"Edward, your mother and Alice were to attend me when my time came. I have no one here with me. Please, I know it will be uncomfortable for you, but I do not wish to do this alone. Please."

Irina heaved a sigh before finally agreeing to my wishes. "Very well, you may stay. But understand that you will do exactly as I say and you must not look as it will be unseemly."

Nodding in agreement with her, Edward once again took his place at my side as Irina made a quick examination and seemed pleased.

"You will deliver soon. This is an impatient child."

As it turned out, the laboring did progress quickly. It seemed only a short while before Irina wrapped the sheets around the bedposts, placing the knotted ends in my hands. Edward's face was full of confusion as he watched the preparations. I briefly remembered my own curiosity as I had watched the same process when Alice had birthed little Anna. However, my remembrances were short-lived as another pain wracked my body.

Leaning me forward with her arm supporting my back, Irina instructed me on how to push when the next pain arrived. Edward was patient with me, offering comfort and encouragement as I struggled to push our child from my body. He had adjusted his position, sitting on the edge of the bed and holding my hands as I grasped the knotted sheets. I did just as Irina asked for the next couple of hours until I felt as though I could no longer hold my body up.

"I – I cannot do anymore. Please." I was exhausted and wished only to sleep. Edward immediately leaned forward and kissed my forehead, whispering, "You are doing so well, my Bella. Just a little longer."

Shaking my head, I looked up and met his eyes, "No more, Edward. I cannot." Another pain gripped my body as Irina watched me closely, but I could not pull myself forward to push against it. When it passed, Edward placed his hands on either side of my face, wiping my tears with his thumbs and holding my gaze as he spoke softly, yet sternly.

"Bella, I wish to hold our child in my arms. I will do all I can to help you, but only you can give him to me, love."

He did not wait for a response. He released me and rose from the bed only to lift my shoulders with his arms, sliding behind me and leaning his body against the headboard. When the next pain and pressure came, he leaned forward, lifting my body with him as he covered my hands with his own, gripping the sheets along with me. He held me in this position through each of the pains, allowing me to use all my efforts to push against it.

It only lasted a few more minutes as I had renewed strength. Where I had been nearly too exhausted to birth the baby for myself, I was determined to do it for Edward. I could picture him in my mind, cradling our tiny baby in his arms. I could find the strength to do it to see the adoration in his eyes as he looked upon our child.

"Aaahhhh!" A sudden rush of movement and burning sensation caused me to cry out as Edward tightened his grip on my hands before pulling me back against him at Irina's instruction. I heard him whispering in my ear to relax for a moment. Closing my eyes, I drew a deep breath and let my body go limp for a moment.

Seconds later, my eyes shot open as I heard my child's first cry. It was but a tiny whimper which quickly turned into a wail as Irina lifted and placed the tiny, squirming child on my belly.

Beside me, I heard Edward's sharp intake of breath. He whispered the words as my eyes met with the proof of his statement.

"A son. You have given me a son."

Tearing my eyes away from the tiny boy, I met Edward's eyes which were full of tears. I found there the same expression I had pictured in my mind's eye. Adoration. However, they were not focused on our child, but on me.

"I love you, my Bella. Thank you."

I closed my eyes as he pressed a gentle kiss to my lips. Then turning our attention back to the baby, we watched as Irina rubbed him briskly with a soft cloth before wrapping him in swaddling and lifting him into Edward's arms.

"You hold him snugly, Papa. Mama and I have some things to finish up. Sliding his chair closer, Edward sat and stared in wonder at our son. While Irina guided me through what was left of the birthing process, I focused my attention on my husband and my son. My family. I now had a blood relative once again and I was forever tied to Edward in a way that no one else could be.

When all was finished and Irina had bathed our son, she excused herself from the room to give us some time alone. Edward brought me the quilt I had made from my father's shirts and draped it in my arms. He then gently placed my son in the swaddling and watched as I wrapped it around our little boy. Tenderly stroking the tiny bundle with his hand, he took a deep breath and spoke.

"I believe this would be the perfect moment to inform you of the name I have chosen for our son."

EPOV

I had been amazed for the last several months as I had watched her grow our child within her. I had no doubt that she would be an amazing mother and I could hardly stand the waiting as the time grew closer for her to be delivered.

On this day as I had watched her labor and struggle to birth our child, I was alternately excited, scared, worried and in awe of her strength. Where she found the determination at the end when her body was so exhausted, I will never comprehend.

Now, watching her swaddle and gently rock our son in her arms, I knew I had made the right choice in a name for him. I knew it would be his name from the moment she had offered to let me choose it. I could only hope that she would be pleased.

"I believe this would be the perfect moment to inform you of the name I have chosen for our son."

She nodded at me as I took a deep breath. I wrapped my hand around hers, which was resting over our son and met her eyes.

"His name is Charles. Charles Edward Cullen."

Her eyes were wide and quickly filled with tears. "You wish him to have my father's name?"

"I do. He will carry my surname, but needs a given name to aspire to. Your father was a kind, honorable man, Bella. I wish to honor his memory and his place in our son's heritage."

I waited for a moment for her response. She simply allowed her tears to fall and whispered a nearly silent 'thank you' as she cradled our son. Irina soon returned and I excused myself to make our announcement to the staff as well as make arrangements for a meal for my Bella. Irina stayed with Isabella as she brought Charles to her breast to nourish him for the first time. My departure from the room would spare us both some embarrassment and discomfort until she grew more comfortable with this aspect of parenting.

I was a parent. A father. Isabella and I had a son. The reality of it was overwhelming and I was at once filled with great trepidation as well as all encompassing love for my wife and child.

Returning to our room some time later, I found my sweet wife sleeping soundly with our son nestled in his cradle beside her. The room had been returned to it's previous state with no remaining signs of the events of the day. Removing my clothing, I carefully lowered myself into bed beside Bella, hoping to get a bit of sleep before Charles woke for a feeding. Almost instantly, Bella shifted and cuddled into my side. Wrapping her in my arms gently, I drifted off to sleep with the image of my wife holding our son in her arms and the anticipation of introducing my son to his grandparents when morning arrived.


	39. Growing and Hope

**I own nothing.**

**I must say, that I am sad as I write this. When I began this story 6 months ago, I never dreamed that you would support it (and me) the way that you have. You have offered kind words and encouragement. I will be forever grateful to those of you who have reviewed and recommended this story to others. I am humbled. Thank you.**

**Thank you for reading and as always, please let me know what you think. To those of you who have been with me from the beginning, please take a moment to let me know what you thought of the story as a whole and whether you would be interested in reading anything else as I have another story that is taking shape in my mind and I would like to share it.**

**This chapter is short, but it says what it needs to and I felt it was where it needed to end. **

**Let's enjoy Edward's happiness.**

EPOV

"Good morning, husband. Did you enjoy your ride?"

"I enjoyed it immensely, love. The new additions to the stable have proven a wise investment." I leaned forward to press a kiss to her cheek before stroking a finger across the cheek of the babe who nursed greedily at her breast. My Bella had taken to mothering as though she had practiced it for years. She was patient and loving and all that a child could wish for in a mother and I grew more proud of her by the day.

"I have sent Rachel for our morning meal. It should arrive once you have cleaned up."

"Are you insinuating that I need to bathe?" I dropped my jaw in mock horror as I pulled my shirt from my body, dropping it to the floor. Glancing back up at my wife, I was more than a bit pleased to find her staring unashamedly at my bare chest. "Something you fancy, Sweetheart?"

Her cheeks blushed a delicious pink as her eyes met mine, but her words were playful.

"I do not deny that I always fancy you, Edward. I would enjoy nothing more than watching you undress for days on end." Given the newness of the child in her arms, I was a bit shocked at her words.

"Hmmm… perhaps we should consider giving your poor body a rest for a bit, love. But for your knowledge, I enjoy watching you reveal your body to me as well."

She laughed then, a hearty, melodious laugh. The babe in her arms startled and whimpered as she shook her head, "Well, at the moment, your body smells of sweat and horses. Perhaps we should have this particular discussion once you are clean."

I smiled and nodded in agreement and excused myself to the water closet. I could hear Rachel's arrival with our meal as well as Isabella's gentle voice as she sang to the baby. It took only a few minutes before I was presentable and I quickly joined her for our meal.

Just as I reached my chair, the door flung open.

"Papa!" My son's small feet pounded across the wooden floor as he raced to my arms, flinging himself forward with a squeal of delight. Lifting him against my chest, I tickled his belly, eliciting another squeal and giggles that were nearly identical to his mother's.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Cullen. He saw you return and was beside himself to see you." Rachel's eyes were full of worry, for what reason I could not comprehend. I had never denied access to my son and was never upset when he sought me out. I waved her off, smiling at Charles as he babbled incessantly while reaching for a pastry.

"He is fine, Rachel. Thank you for caring for him while Mrs. Cullen was indisposed."

She simply nodded and retreated from the room, closing the door behind her. Bella and I ate our meal with few words, listening to our son chatter on and glancing occasionally at our daughter who slept silently in the cradle beside us.

Much in our lives had changed over the past few years. The estate had become extremely prosperous. Many of the investments and improvements we had made had proven to be profitable. The farming was as strong as ever and the horses that were bred and sold from our stables were among the best in the area. The manor had become a social hub as well. Isabella had assumed her role as mistress of the manor and had just recently completed preparations for our fifth Winter Ball which would take place in just over a month. There seemed to be an endless stream of visitors to the estate as well. Bella had proven herself to be the gracious host, even offering our home up for many dinner parties and gatherings.

The education of the tenant children had grown so that we were faced with the dilemma of overpopulation. I hired a crew of men from town and once again renovated the cottage to include two more classrooms. After hiring two more tutors, many of the less fortunate families in town had sought us out to inquire whether we would be willing to accommodate their children as well. My compassionate wife had immediately agreed and we were once again considering the need to expand our facilities.

At the same time, our families seemed to be expanding as well. Alice had given birth to another daughter, Sarah Lynn, only a year after Anna Grace was born. Jasper was severely outnumbered by females and we teased him mercilessly that he would need to father a boy soon or we would purchase a bonnet and petticoats for him as well. For some reason, he did not find this amusing.

Emmett and Rosalie had taken on the management of her family estate and had happily welcomed a son only a month ago. Emma was overjoyed to have a brother and Rosalie was surprisingly healthy and strong throughout her pregnancy. Emmett Carlisle Cullen was the joy of his father's life and Rosalie would often remark that she was only permitted to hold the boy when she was feeding him. To which Emmett would respond that were he equipped, he would provide that for the child as well. While I loved being a father, I cannot say that is something I had any interest in whatsoever. The thought of a baby sucking on any part of my body was a bit unnerving.

That particular duty had been difficult for my Bella in the beginning. The midwife had returned daily for the first week or so, trying to assist her, but she became swollen and Charles had struggled to get milk. I watched in horror one morning as Irina had placed ice packing around Bella's breasts to decrease the swelling and ached for the discomfort it must have caused her. In the end, it had worked and Charles fed well and slept for several hours that night, providing my Bella with the best sleep she had enjoyed since birthing our son. When our daughter arrived three weeks ago, it had been much easier.

I was present for that birth as well. Having been by my wife's side as our son entered the world, I would not be persuaded to leave her when our daughter came. When I told Emmett and Jasper about the events surrounding Charles' birth, they were at first horrified, but as I described the joy and closeness that had come from it, they were envious. Both of them had insisted on being present at the births of their second child.

My parents had been with us to visit with their grandchildren and had departed only yesterday after securing a promise from us that we would visit in a couple of months. I believe my mother was thrilled with the prospect of spoiling her grandchildren and presenting them proudly to her friends. For now, we were enjoying the quiet peacefulness of our morning.

Charles had finished his meal and was playing quietly with wooden blocks on the floor near the hearth. Bella had worried he might press in to close to the fire and had placed a rug on the floor, instructing him that he could not go beyond the edge of it while he played. He did not like the heat and kept well away. He was a pleasant child and often rode with me in the mornings. He enjoyed the outdoors and Bella insisted he was aptly named as he seemed to share the same interests that her father had enjoyed. He favored me through the face and eyes, but had Bella's brown curls and gentleness. We had yet to discover what temperament our daughter held, but seemed to already be a bit more vocal when she was hungry than Charles had been at the same age.

"Edward?"

Looking up from where Charles played quietly, I met my wife's gaze. "I am sorry, did you address me, love?"

"I did. You were lost in your thoughts. All is well, I hope?"

Reaching over to take her hand, I squeezed gently before pulling her fingers to my lips and kissing them gently. "Forgive me. All is well, I was simply reminiscing about how our lives have changed. What is it that you asked of me?"

"I wondered if you had the opportunity to look in on Ben and Angela while you were out this morning."

Ben and Angela had been married not long after the Winter Ball before Charles was born. She had been a great help to him in managing the cottage school. Within a few days of their wedding anniversary, Angela had given birth to twin boys and now was expecting another child.

"I did. The midwife had been to see them yesterday and felt that the child would come within a day or two. Angela looked well. Tired, but well."

"I am glad to hear it. I have felt horrible that I have been unable to see her these last few weeks. Perhaps as soon as the child arrives we could pay a visit to offer our congratulations."

"I would be happy to take you to visit." Shifting forward in my chair, I lifted my sleeping daughter into my arms as I had not yet held her this morning. Gazing at her tiny pink face, I quietly spoke, "Bella? We have a circumstance to overcome."

My wife glanced up quickly, meeting my eyes with a worried look. I immediately smiled to put her at ease. Were I able, I would never allow worry or fear to enter her life again. I had seen it mar her features far too many times as it was. Her nightmares had returned when Charles was a few days old. Her mind would play scenes of James Smith returning to cause harm to me and our son while she was unable to stop him. She would wake shaking and weeping until I placed the child in her arms and held them close while she calmed. Thankfully, the nightmares had not returned after the birth of our daughter.

"I did not mean to alarm you, my Bella. I simply wanted to draw your attention to the fact that our little Elizabeth is still in need of a complete name. Have you come to a decision or is she destined to hobble along with a partial moniker?"

Bella's face grew tender and she looked away for a moment before standing and walking toward me. Kneeling beside my chair, she placed her hand over mine where it rested on our daughter. She brushed her finger over Elizabeth's tiny fingers where they were wrapped around the ring finger of my right hand. After a moment, she looked up and met my gaze. When she spoke, her words were but a whisper.

"I have chosen a name. I suppose it was born out of what I want for her more than anything. What I suppose my parents wanted for me when I was newly born. What you have renewed for me many times over, Edward. Hope. Her name is Elizabeth Hope Cullen."

Her eyes were filled with joyful tears and I could not help but claim her lips with my own in a gentle kiss. It was true. I had seen it grow within her. Hope that had been taken from her with her home and her father's health had been restored to her with kindness and love. She had become the woman she was always meant to be – loving, compassionate, kind, confident and full of hope for the world around her. It now overflowed out of her life and into others. She had given hope to my parents when they believed their son would never choose a wife. She had given hope to my brother and his wife when they feared for the life of their daughter. She had offered hope to desperately poor children, and by extension, their families. I had no doubt that she would continue to impact the lives around her by virtue of the love, kindness and hope she offered freely to all.

"Elizabeth Hope." I felt the weight of her name on my lips as I watched her sleep. After a moment, I met Bella's eyes and was in awe of the love I found there. "Hope is perfect, Bella. I love it."

"I love you, Edward."

"As I love you, my Bella."


End file.
